Ch 14
Daniel and Sam were bored. They were sitting side by side in the front of the cart, legs dangling but feeling very confined.
"I don't like that," Daniel complained as Jack added several bags of frozen vegetables to the cart's contents.
"You'll like my special secret recipe," Jack promised.
Sam swung her legs impatiently, accidentally kicking Jack in the leg in the process as he tried to push the cart.
"Sam," Jack complained. It was the fifth time. He was losing his patience.
"Sorry, Colonel," she apologized. "But it's just so boring in the cart. Can we please get down and walk?"
"We can help! You can tell us what to get and we'll bring it!" Daniel said quickly.
Jack shook his head firmly. "I'm not having you both running all over the store."
They both pouted.
"All right. Fine. You can get out and walk. But you both hang onto the cart at all times."
They nodded eagerly - anything to get out of those baby seats in the cart!
Being allowed to walk was marginally better… and Daniel managed to sneak a big bag of cookies into the cart while Jack was busy tying Sam's shoe into double knots for her.
Finally, the cart was completely full and Jack was convinced they wouldn't have to come back here for at least a week. He was hoping he could get the kids to eat at least half of what he'd bought, despite the fact that all Sam claimed to want was marshmallows and peanut butter and Daniel kept sneaking things into the cart when he thought Jack wasn't paying attention.
It was near lunch time already and the store was packed. As Jack picked the shortest line he could find, he groaned to himself. There were seven people in front of him, even though he was in the self-check lane. This was going to take forever.
Sam and Daniel felt the same way seeing the length of the line they were expected to wait patiently in. looking around, bored, Sam spotted something quickly and grinned.
"Colonel O'Neill, are those games?" she asked, pointing to the row of video games and claw machines against the front wall of the store.
Jack nodded warily. "But…"
"Please can we go play?" she asked immediately.
Jack felt around in his pockets and fished out a few quarters. "Okay," he said, satisfied that they couldn't last very long on games that were foreign to them with only a few quarters apiece. He could easily see them from the line. "Stay together, and come back over here when you're out of quarters. Don't talk to anybody."
They nodded eagerly and took off, holding hands and weaving through the sea of adults easily.
Once Daniel and Sam reached the bank of games, they stopped and stared, trying to figure out exactly what to do. An older boy went over to the farthest game. They watched him put some quarters in the right slot and hit a button, then start playing with the joystick and buttons.
"I can't see this one," Sam complained, trying to see the screen of the first game.
"Me either," Daniel said. He turned his attention to the claw game. "Let's do this one."
"Okay," she agreed, sticking a quarter in the slot. The game started up. She watched as the claw moved around, assuming you were supposed to try to grab one of the toys below. Moving the joystick experimentally, she saw that it controlled the claw.
"Go back!" Daniel instructed.
Between the two of them, they played the game until all their quarters were gone and still hadn't managed to actually grab anything. Disappointed, Daniel asked, "Got anymore quarters?"
Sam felt around in her pockets and shook her head, but pulled out a crumpled dollar. "But I got some of our swear dollars," she grinned.
"I don't see a spot to put in dollars," Daniel frowned, examining the machine.
"Let's do that one! That old lady put a dollar in it before and she won candy," Sam pointed to a vending machine nearby.
"Do you think Colonel Jack will let us eat candy? Doctor Janet told him not to," Daniel remembered.
They tried to see him, standing on their tiptoes and craning their necks in his direction. They couldn't see him amongst all the adults. "My brother teached me this when he was trying not to get caught throwing water balloons at cars," Sam said, getting down on her hands and knees. "Stand on my back but don't fall and be real still."
Daniel grabbed the joystick of the claw game for balance and did as instructed, jumping off quickly once he spotted Jack. "He's at the checkout, he's busy with all the stuff swiping it through the thingy."
"It's called a scanner," Sam informed him bossily, getting to her feet and brushing her hands off. "Okay, good, then he's not looking. Come on."
She hurried over to the vending machine in what she thought was a sneaky manner, Daniel following and trying to spot Jack. Between the two of them, they figured out how to get their dollar in and press the buttons that matched the letters and numbers next to the candy they wanted. Fishing in Sam's pockets yielded three dollars, so they ended up with a KitKat, a Snickers, and a bag of M&Ms, which they decided to share. They quickly crammed everything in their pockets and tried to look innocent as they headed back over to Jack.
He glanced at them as he continued bagging groceries. "No luck with the claw game?"
They shook their heads, trying to look disappointed.
"Well, we're almost done. We'll go home, have lunch, and play."
Jack buckled them into their seats and then turned his attention to loading all the groceries into the bed of the truck. While he did this, the kids were in the back seat eating candy as quickly as they could.
"He's coming!" Daniel exclaimed as they heard the gate slam shut. They both shoved a handful of M&Ms into their mouths just in time, quickly pocketing the rest of the candy as Jack climbed behind the wheel and started the car.
He turned to look at them. "All set?"
They both nodded, unable to speak. As eager to get home as they were, Jack put the truck in reverse.
He frowned as he pulled onto his street. Not only did he now have a headache, because Sam and Daniel had suddenly burst into loud and repeated choruses of "Row Row Row Your Boat" halfway home, and could not be stopped or deferred to another song, but he recognized Janet Fraiser's car parked in front of his house.
"What did we do to deserve a surprise house call?" he muttered to himself as he pulled in the driveway, wondering if it would be too rude to get the diminutive doctor to help him bring in the groceries.
She was waiting at the front door with a worried look on her face and her cell phone in her hand.
"What's up, Doc?" Jack asked, eliciting enthusiastic giggles from the kids for the little joke.
"General Hammond and I have both been unable to reach you today. He was concerned and asked me to come check on you all."
Jack shrugged. "We were at the grocery store. I couldn't find my cell when we were heading out the door."
Sam and Daniel exchanged guilty looks at that, which he filed away to address later, and then promptly started chasing each other around the yard at top speed.
"What's got into them?" Janet asked, watching the frenetic four year olds with the critical eye of a doctor.
"Nothing," Jack said defensively. "They're four."
"You didn't give them coffee for breakfast again, did you?"
"I never GAVE it to them in the first place! You're the one who left an unattended coffee pot within reach."
"Hmm. Well, anyway. Hammond wants you at a meeting at 3 to go over what they've learned about the egg. You can bring the kids with you or if you want, I can take them to my house. I have the afternoon off and Cassie gets home at 3:30. I know she would love to see them."
"Thanks… but they've been asking for Teal'c all day. I think it's time to let Uncle Teal'c fulfill some of his babysitting duties."
Janet shrugged. "All right. I'll have an airman drop him off here after two."
"Thanks. You want to stay for lunch to make sure I'm not poisoning them?" he asked a bit sarcastically, handing her a lightweight bag of groceries and taking the other three himself.
"I don't think that's necessary," Janet said mildly, following him inside.
"Oy! Inside, you two!" Jack called, unwilling to leave them alone in the front of the house, so close to the street.
The kids ran inside, past both adults, screaming and still chasing each other.
"Good lord, they're like windup toys," Janet said, as they disappeared down the hall that lead to their room.
Jack nodded and started unpacking the groceries somewhat self-consciously, knowing the doctor was scrutinizing his choices critically.
A loud crash from the back of the house drew their attention, but Daniel quickly called, "We're okay! Sam just fell off the bed is all!"
"Oh brother," Janet said, hurrying off to check for herself.
Jack thought to himself that Sam couldn't have fallen off the bed unless they'd been JUMPING on the bed, and had to admit to himself that they did seem even more crazy-energetic than usual all of a sudden. He pondered this while he quickly put the rest of the groceries away and started making them all sandwiches for lunch.
The reason became clear a few minutes later when Janet shepherded them into the kitchen, a hand on each little shoulder. Each kid had chocolate remnants on their faces and was clutching empty candy wrappers.
"Where exactly did all this candy come from?" Janet demanded. "Do you know what this much sugar does to such tiny bodies, Colonel? I'm getting tired of having this conversation with you…"
"It's not his fault," Daniel interrupted quickly.
"We were sneaky," Sam added, looking down at her shoes. "The Colonel didn't know. We got candy at the grocery store."
"You STOLE candy?" Jack demanded, forgetting to curb his angry, harsh tone.
Sam's eyes welled up instantly at his tone, and he felt terrible when she shook her head, sniffling, crying, and tried to explain in the middle of her sudden fit, "W…we didn't steal it."
"We didn't," Daniel echoed, rubbing his nose and crying a little too. "We used our swear dollars."
"I had some of em in my pocket," Sam said. "We got the candy from one of the games. You push the right buttons and candy comes out."
"A vending machine?" Janet asked.
"I dunno," Daniel said, as Sam shrugged.
Jack sighed. "Sorry, guys. You shouldn't have bought candy without asking, or eaten it without asking, but I'm very glad you didn't take it without paying. Come here."
They both approached warily, but he just plopped them gently on the counter next to the sink and carefully wiped off their faces, removing all traces of tears and chocolate with a damp wash cloth.
"Now, do you have any room for lunch or are you all full of candy?"
"Full of candy."
"Okay. Go play outside then, and we'll eat later. Run off the rest of your crazy sugar highs." He set them both back on the ground, ruffling their hair affectionately as they ran off.
"Well, I'd better be off," Janet said. "I have some errands to run before Cassie gets home and…"
The kids ran back inside at full speed, looking very worried about something, and both suddenly stood in front of Jack, building a little wall between him and Janet.
"What's going on, guys?" Jack asked, puzzled.
"We don't want you to get in trouble," Daniel said.
"Nobody's in trouble," he said, confused.
"Colonel Jack DID RICE his knee just like you said, Dr. Janet," Sam said quickly. "Don't make him go back to the infirmary, please!"
Jack laughed.
"Why would I…"
"We helped him, he almost forgotted but we helped him!" Daniel insisted.
"Yeah, about that. You owe me, Doc," Jack said lightly.
"What on earth are you three…" Janet started.
Jack explained the whole misunderstanding, about the kids thinking he needed dry rice poured onto his knee as a result of overhearing her. She was laughing heartily by the end of the story, and the kids were contributing their own versions of the story every now and then too.
"Then Colonel O'Neill explained the rice wasn't real rice, it was just a anagram," Sam said.
"That's when the letters stand for something," Daniel added proudly.
"Actually, that's an acronym," Janet corrected.
"It is?" Jack, Sam, and Daniel all asked together.
Janet gave Jack a strange look, and he shrugged. "Oops."
Daniel and Sam scowled at Jack for several moments, as though he had intentionally told them the wrong word to make them look foolish, but quickly forgave him in favor of asking, "What are we doing next?
TBC