Chapter 4

It was a minute or two more before Jarrod felt up to walking to the house unaided. He didn't want Maggie to see him coming back from town with an angina attack, or she might never let him go out on his own again. Heath walked along beside him, but he didn't stay long inside, just long enough to bid Maggie good-bye, and then he was off.

"Things go well in town?" Maggie asked.

Jarrod leaned in to kiss her. "Very well. Got what Nick wanted from the army, and I won a hundred dollars at poker."

Maggie laughed. "Don't go turning into a professional gambler on me."

"Not a chance," Jarrod said. "Did you have a nice visit with Heath?"

"Brief, but nice. He told me a bit more about his history, where he came from."

Jarrod nodded. "Well, I've always thought that was for Heath to talk about, not me."

"I understand. He was very sweet about it. He just wanted me to know how welcoming a family you have, that once a Barkley, always a Barkley."

"He must have been listening to us on the back porch the other night."

"Maybe, or maybe our moving just prompted the same thoughts in them as it did in us."

Jarrod looked at his wife and kissed her again. And he felt ashamed about his tantrum in the barn. How could he ever curse his fate when Maggie was part of it? "I expect we'd better have a serious talk with them before too much longer. I need to settle my mind – I know you do, too."

"Tomorrow," Maggie said. "We'll go over for drinks and dinner tomorrow, and we'll tell them everything – how our finances are, and our wills. I suppose we'd better talk about godparents for Jarrod Jr. too. We should really work everything we can out before this baby gets too much closer."

Jarrod nodded and took Maggie into his arms. She was absolutely right, they should discuss everything, open and honestly, with his family. "You need to know that I don't feel like I'm anywhere near leaving you yet, but I did have another angina attack in the barn."

Maggie smiled. "I know. It always shows in your eyes, Jarrod."

"My eyes?"

"That and the fact that your knees are dirty and you have hay on your butt. You can't keep any secrets from me."

Jarrod chuckled. "Never again, my love. I had a pretty good temper tantrum, too."

"It's about time," Maggie said.

Jarrod chuckled. "Heath said the same thing. But I'm ashamed of it. It hurt, it didn't help."

"I'm not surprised."

"I won't let it happen again."

"That's a promise you won't be able to keep. It's natural to be angry."

"Still, I don't like it."

"Neither do I, but if it happens, it's probably best if you don't fight it. And getting back to the other subject, it is time we did the responsible thing. We need to plan for any contingency we can – even the possibility that I might be leaving you."

"No," Jarrod said flatly, looking very seriously at her. "No, that isn't possible."

"It is," Maggie said. "A lot of women die in childbirth, Jarrod."

"Not you," Jarrod said, shaking his head. "Not you." He pulled her close. "But you're right. If we're going to be responsible, we'd better be as responsible as we can get."

Maggie chuckled at a thought. "We should be responsible about being responsible?"

Jarrod shared her smile. "The most responsible responsible people who were ever responsible."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Well, looks like everybody's here!" Jarrod said cheerfully, tossing his hat on the table in the foyer and leading his wife by the hand into the living room.

"Jarrod!" Victoria said and stood up from the settee.

Audra had been sitting beside her, with Carl behind them and Nick and Heath at the refreshment table. Many handshakes and hugs followed at Jarrod and Maggie's surprise visit, and Nick poured scotch for Jarrod and a bit of wine for Maggie. Maggie sat down gingerly into one of the armchairs – sitting down was beginning to be a chore. Jarrod stood behind her, his hand on her shoulder. She could feel him trembling a bit, and he could feel her doing the same. They gave each other reassuring smiles.

"So, how do you like The Grove?" Audra asked. "Are you settling in?"

"As soon as I remember where we keep the coffee cups," Jarrod said.

"Thanks for taking care of those talks with the army, big brother," Nick said. "You got a good deal."

"I'll bring the paperwork by tomorrow," Jarrod said. "I'll meet with the army representative the day after, so be sure you can be here around lunchtime, all right?"

"I'll be here," Nick said. "And how is my favorite sister-in-law feeling these days?"

Maggie smiled. "Big. This baby is going to be a whopper."

"He's a Barkley," Nick said.

"He's a Barkley and a half," Jarrod said. "Carl, how are you enjoying life with our spoiled little sister?"

"I'm not spoiled!" Audra protested.

Carl said, "She's probably a little more spoiled than she already was, but she takes good care of me, too. And I never ate so well."

Nick nearly choked on his drink. "Audra can cook?"

"You just never appreciated me," Audra said.

They exchanged lots of chit-chat for the next half hour or so, until Jarrod and Maggie exchanged looks and decided it was time for that serious talk. They wanted to do it once and be settled with everything they could think of forever. Since Carl and Audra were also here, this was the ideal time. They said all that to each other through their eyes.

Jarrod said, "Maggie and I have been feeling a lot more like responsible adults now that we're in our own home. We won't be moving again. We're settled into our accommodations, and we've been talking about other things. We'd like to discuss some things with everybody."

Unease went around the room, but Jarrod and Maggie both smiled at everyone.

Jarrod said, "We have a baby coming. One of the things we wanted to talk about was who Jarrod Jr.'s godparents are going to be."

Smiles went all around then.

"Audra, Nick," Jarrod said. "Will you consent to be his godparents?"

Smiles grew. "I'd be thrilled, " Audra said.

"Me, too," Nick said.

"Well, keep in mind, he's going to be a handful. He already is. But that leads us into the more serious responsible part of our thinking."

Jarrod took a deep breath. Maggie squeezed his hand on her shoulder.

Jarrod went on. "Maybe we've avoided the truth among all of us, but Maggie and I have had some thorough discussions about it. I'm doing quite well, but it won't last. I don't know how long I'll be able to share our baby's life, and it would settle my mind a lot if I could know that his life and Maggie's life have at least some certainty about them when I'm gone."

The smiles faded, but no one dodged the discussion. Victoria looked at Nick and Heath, and their eyes told her to go on, to talk about what they had talked about privately. Victoria said, "It's something we've talked about, too – Nick and Heath and I. Before I talked to the two of you about it, I needed to be sure we were all together on this, and we are. Maggie – you're a part of this family forever, no matter what happens. If the day comes that you'd feel more comfortable moving back into this house, you are most welcome. If you want to stay at The Grove, we'll do everything we can to make you feel comfortable and safe there. Even if you decide to go back to San Francisco, you will always be one of us. Whatever you want, whatever you need, we will take care of you and the baby, for as long as you need us."

Jarrod and Maggie both felt tears coming. Jarrod squeezed Maggie's shoulder, and she squeezed his hand. "Thank you. Thank you so much," Maggie said. "But, you know, childbirth can be difficult for a woman, and there is a possibility that Jarrod will be trying to raise this rambunctious little man on his own."

"Well, I don't know about taking Jarrod back – " Nick said quietly, letting his eyes sparkle at his older brother.

"He's welcome here, too," Victoria said, "and if for some reason you wanted it, we'd take you both back."

Jarrod said, "Thank you. You should also know that as far as money goes, Maggie and I are well situated with the bank in Stockton. And our wills are drawn up and on file with the Clerk in town. We've put together written instructions I have in my desk at The Grove, for other things, like details about things. We've tried to take care of as much as we can so that no matter what happens or when it happens, we'll all know what to do."

"You know," Carl said, looking at his wife, "these are things we ought to be thinking about, too."

"You should have new wills, now that you're married," Jarrod said. "Your old ones are no longer valid. We can get together sometime next week and I'll draw them up for you."

"Just like a lawyer," Heath said. "Always on the lookout for business."

A bit of laugher finally came through. "You get the family rate," Jarrod said, "which is zero, I might add."

"Well, since I'm about to become a grandmother," Victoria said, "I might want to revisit my will as well."

"We might as well all do it," Heath said. "Keep Jarrod busy and out of trouble for a few days."

Jarrod raised his scotch. "Then it looks like it's settled. Any other legalities we need to talk about, we can take care of next week. Now, let's toast all the responsible adults gathered in this room."

"Here, here," Victoria said.

XXXXXX

As they left in their buggy to go home after dinner, the last light fading in the sky, Maggie let her head rest against Jarrod's shoulder. "That went pretty well, didn't it?" she asked.

"Mm-hmm," Jarrod said. "We probably should have known Mother had already taken the bull by the horns with Nick and Heath and that she wanted to talk about it, too."

"Quite a woman, your mother."

"Yes, she is," Jarrod said. "And my wife is quite a woman, too. I can't believe how lucky I am."

"I can't believe how lucky I am," Maggie said.

"We're going to be all right, you know – you, me, and Jarrod Jr. We're going to be all right for quite a while."

"I know," Maggie said.

Jarrod kissed her on top of the head.

Suddenly, Clara just stopped, the buggy jerking to a stop with her. Just before Jarrod could snap the reins again, Clara fell over dead in the road, and twisted the buggy with her.

Jarrod pushed Maggie and jumped. They never even had time to scream.