Chapter 30

APOV

It's Sunday afternoon and I have finally stopped crying. I am trying to quiet myself so I read a favorite book of mine, 'Persuasion' by Jane Austen. I've turned my cell phone on but the only missed messages I have are from Kate. A little while later my phone rings and it's her. "Hello."

"Ana, how are you?" She can't disguise the concern in her voice.

"Well, I have been better but I've stopped crying at least. I'm going back to work tomorrow. I think it will help me keep my mind off things."

"Good. You need to get out. Why don't you come to Bellevue on Saturday to the Grey's Coping Together masquerade ball?"

"Kate, you can't be serious. I am not going to a ball where I will most definitely see Christian."

"No, Elliot said Christian isn't going. Come on. It'll be fun."

"Why isn't Christian going?"

"I don't know. Elliot just said he wasn't going and his parents were upset about it. So, are you going to come?"

"I don't know. I'm still not sure it's a good idea."

"Just think about it, OK?"

"I'll think about it but don't get your hopes up."

"I'll check in on you later."

"Thank you, Kate. You really are a best friend."

"Oh, Ana, I love you."

"I love you too, Kate."

Monday morning I arrive at work. I sit down at my desk to get ready for the day. "Ana, how are you feeling?" Mary asks me.

"I'm on the mend. Thank you for everything you've done, Mary. I really appreciate it."

"Ana, I meant it when I said you are the best assistant I ever had. You're a wonderful and bright young woman and I hate to see you in that way."

In an uncharacteristically move, I leap up from my seat and give Mary a hug. Mary hugs me back and laughs.

The day is going smoothly considering I haven't been here for a week. Mid-morning I check my cell. I have two missed calls and one voicemail from Christian. I delete the voicemail without listening to it. I have barely eaten anything for a week so at lunchtime, I head down to the corner cafe to get a salad and some soup. I don't really feel like eating but I know I need to. As I sit at the cafe table a text comes through. It's Christian.

*Ana, I need to speak with you. Please, can I see you?*

Seeing his text makes my hands shake and I have to hold back the tears that threaten to fall. I turn off the screen and ignore his text. I finish my lunch and head back to the office. About an hour later I receive another text.

*Ana, please give me a chance to explain.*

He isn't going to give up and I won't give into his games. Who the hell does he think he is that he can just play with someone's feelings like this? Does he think I'm stupid enough to fall for his perverted scheme? I block his number so I don't have to deal with him anymore. Luckily the rest of the day is without drama but I am exhausted from faking a smile all day. I lie down on my bed and fall fast asleep without waking until my alarm clock goes off.

CPOV

I tried to call and text Ana yesterday so I can explain everything to her. But she won't answer me. Of course, I don't blame her. Maybe this is my punishment. I finally fall in love with someone who loves me back and I ruin it. If I could only tell her I didn't mean to, if I didn't have to hurt her, I wouldn't have done it. I never wanted to wound her.

I've made plans to meet Elliot for lunch today. I don't feel like it but he is my brother and I promised him. I'm sipping my sparkling water and have already ordered by the time my lackadaisical brother decides to show up at the Metropolitan Grill.

"Hey there, little brother. What did you order?" He asks as he sits in the booth.

"Eight-ounce filet, medium, with the house fries."

"That sounds good." He calls the waiter over. "I'll have what he ordered." The waiter nods and goes back to the kitchen.

"So…. Christian. How are you doing?"

"Fine. I'm doing fine." I know where he is going with this and I really don't wish to discuss this.

"Really. So then you won't have a problem telling me what happened between you and Ana."

I pause and look at him. "Like I said. She bored me. You know the women who interest me."

"Maybe if I wasn't your brother and saw that you really cared for Ana, I would believe you. But you are lying and I can tell you are miserable. So, why don't you just tell me what really happened?"

"I did it for Ana. To protect her."

"Why would you need to break up with someone you like to protect her? You're not telling me everything."

"Since when did you become so observant?"

"Since I married a journalist. So tell me." He places his napkin down.

I take a deep breath, partly because I'm frustrated with my brother and partly because I am trying to prepare myself to actually say the words out loud. "A former submissive threatened to kill her. We couldn't find her so I thought the only way to protect Ana is to break up with her."

"Why didn't you just tell the cops?"

"If I did that, I can only imagine what the tabloids would say. You know about my past; can you imagine what everyone else would think, especially Mom and Dad?"

"Dude, I'm sorry. That really sucks. So you really did care for Ana?"

I look him in his eyes and I decide I should just be honest. Plus, he's known about my BDSM lifestyle for years and has never uttered a word to anyone about it. "I'm in love with her. The look on Ana's face when I was breaking up with her will forever be seared in my brain."

"So where is the former submissive now?"

"She's at a psychiatric hospital. My psychiatrist is taking lead on her case."

"Well, then I guess we should start working on a plan."

"Plan? A plan for what?"

"To get you and Ana back together you dumbass."