Disclaimer: I do not own the rights for the characters. I thank L. J. Smith for creating this beautiful books, Julie Plec for creating the show and TheCW for showing it.
Sorry I didn't made it to upload the chapter yesterday, I was a bit distracted. Mainly by twitter ;D But yeah, here it is. I hope you like it ;D
Somewhere just beyond my reach
There's someone reaching back for me
Racing on the thunder and rising with the heat
Isn't there a superman to sweep me off my feet?
I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night
He's gotta be strong
And he's gotta be fast
And he's gotta be larger than life
- Ella Mae Bowen Holding ou for a Hero
24/11/2012, 6:13 pm, Damon's house
'' There's more?''
I think Damon couldn't believe how much I told him and still wanted to tell him in just one evening. I've never talked that much about me before. But then I recognized we didn't talk about his past either. We just talked about school, our friends and light topics. I would have to ask him about his past later.
'' Yes there is. I have a lot of relatives, but I'm not really close with them. And after my parents death noone really wanted to take care of me. I have to admit, it wasn't easy for them, because I refused to move out of the house, because that would have meant I would have to sell it and that I couldn't do. My aunt Jenna, she's the sister of my Mom, tried everything to persuade me to move in with her. She really wanted to take her of me, but because of my little cousin Margaret she couldn't move in with me, because she and her husband Alaric didn't want Margaret to change school and everything for me. And I really understand that. But there still wasn't anyone to take care of me and I'm only 16 so they wouldn't let me live by myself. They nearly forced me to move out, when my cousin, Matt, came up with something. He proposed to share the guardianship with my aunt and he would move in with me. The others didn't really like the idea because he's only 23, but my aunt agreed and so the deal was settled. But I have to admit, I didn't really notice most of that. The days after the accident I was in a really bad shape. I hated myself because of the guilt I felt and I missed them so much that I couldn't deal with it. I didn't leave my room, didn't eat, didn't talk. I just lived in my little cocoon. My cousin then moved in and tried everything to cheer me up or at least to get me to eat something. And then I did and everyone thought I was getting better. But in reality I wasn't and I think that was why everyone was so surprised about what happened next. It was in the night and I hadn't slept properly since the accident. My body couldn't handle all of it anymore and I only saw one solution. So I took a painkiller. But that didn't help and I took another one and so one until I blacked out. My cousin then found me and I was brought to the hospital. But when I was laying there I thought about everything I still had and I realized that I had to fight for it. You have to believe me, I never planned on killing me, it was more an accident. But that was what it took me to be shaken awake and I decided to change my behavior.''
I stopped again. There were tears again, but somehow I could manage not to sob. Damon looked shocked. He definitely hadn't seen that coming. But somehow he also seemed hurt and I really didn't know why.
I stared at him, ready for him to say something, but he didn't. He didn't even look like he was present. Maybe he was just progressing everything.
But then he school his head and looked at me.
'' You nearly died?''
I nodded.
'' That's what you told about earlier. About pain showing that you're still alive. You didn't feel it for a moment, did you?''
I nodded again. He looked at me with eyes wide open in panic, like he couldn't bear the thought of me being dead. I didn't know why, but I didn't want him to tell me, so I asked.
'' There's still a bit more. Or aren't you curious how I landed here?''
Now he nodded.
02/09/2012, 9:47 am, boarding school
I had the feeling I forgot something. Something really important. But that's how it's always been when I packed for vacation. And boarding school was somehow like vacation. But only somehow. But I'd still packed half of my room into bags and cartons and loaded everything in Matt's truck. He and my aunt divided their driving time so that I could sleep the whole 11 hours of the drive. And i have to admit, I really preferred the plane. But if we'd flown I couldn't have taken all my stuff and so we decided to drive here once. The problem was, Matt and Jenna were now sleeping in the car while I had to carry all my stuff into my room myself.
I just picked up another bag when someone stopped in front of me.
'' You don't have to carry that all in your room by yourself, do you?''
The guy was tall and not that bad looking, if you liked blonde hair and green eyes, which I normally didn't.
'' Actually yes. I have to carry it on my own.''
'' That's not an option. A girl like you shouldn't have to do that. Let me help you.''
He then took the bag out of my hands and also tool another one out of the truck. I also took a new one and we walked together to my room.
'' Thank you. I really appreciate it. Otherwise I would've walked at least twenty times. So really thank you.'' Normally I didn't like people to help me, but I really wasn't keen on carrying all by myself and he did it to flirt with me.
'' By the way, I'm Elena.''
I smiled at him. Yeah, he really was cute, but not my type. He was the usual all-American boy, even a bit more like my cousin.
'' I'm Finn. And I'm glad I can help.''
He smile back at me. We walked a bit more and were then standing in front of my room. We had to walk five more times, although Finn always carried at least two bags or cartons. I really would have walked twenty times.
'' Thank you again Finn. I didn't know what I've done with out you. My cousin and my aunt were supposed to help me but they blacked out in the car so thank you.''
'' It was really no problem. I hope to see you around. Bye Elena.''
I waved at him and he then left. I turned around to unpack and was now standing with my back to the door when I heard it open.
'' Did you forget something Finn?''
But when I turned around I didn't see Finn. There was a blonde, blue eyed girl, with two large bags in every hand.
'' I'm not Finn. I'm Caroline. And I didn't forget anything I live here.''
She put down her bags.
'' You have to be Elena then. Principal Lockwood informed me that I would share a room with you. It's going to be so cool. We can make our hair, talk about guys and everything. My last roommate was a bit weird, so I couldn't do that with her. But I can feel it, you are different and we're gonna be great friends.''
She never stopped talking, not even to breathe. But she was such a positive girl. Maybe that was what I needed. She walked in my direction and I thought she wanted to shake my hand, but to my surprise she hugged me.
'' I'm so happy you are here. I think this year will be great.''
She freed me of her embrace and smiled at me.
'' Can you please help me get the rest of my stuff? It's not that much, because I left most of it here over the summer. And on our way you have to tell me, how you got Finn to carry all your stuff in here. He never does it when I asked him.''
I smiled at her and we walked out to get her stuff. And like she demanded I told her about Finn.
24/11/2012, 6:25 pm, Damon's house
'' When I woke up in the hospital I was really shocked. Everyone was really shocked. And because I was 'suicidal' I had to talk to a psychologist and had to stay in the hospital a bit longer. I even missed the funeral. But even if I didn't like my psychologist, she really helped me deal with everything. I didn't blame myself or Bonnie or anyone for the accident anymore. I took it just like it was, an accident. And because I made a lot of progress I could go home. But there it was hard. I had to go back to school immediately. I don't think they knew about the pills, but they all knew about my parents and brother's death and that I wasn't at their funeral, so they all talked about me. And I didn't have left any friends. Maybe Bonnie, but I don't know that.
In the house it was worse. Everywhere were memories of them and I couldn't let go. I started to blame me again and the guilt made it worse until I didn't leave the house anymore. I felt guilty and thought everyone talked about me, so I just stayed at home. But my psychologist recognized it. She tried to talk with me again to convince me that it wasn't my fault. But I shut her out this time. And I also shut out my family. So they talked with her and they decided something had to change. Decided to send me away. They found this school and forced me to go. I really didn't want to at the beginning, but their wasn't an alternative, so I landed here. And it wasn't that bad.''
I smiled at him. He got the hint and smiled back.
I didn't cry this time. I think there weren't any tears left. But I also felt safe. I knew he wouldn't judge me and no matter what he would still be here when I'd finished. And that was one of the things I'd feared before.
'' I'm glad they forced you to come here.''
He again smiled at me
'' But why did you made out with all the guys?''
Like Caroline he didn't understand that. But I hadn't really explained it to him. So.
'' Like I said, I wasn't that good when I came here. I felt alone and unloved. After my family left me, the bit of family that I had left sent me away. They didn't want me. At least then I thought that. And when I got here there was this cute guy, who helped me carry my stuff and flirted and it felt good. When I wanted to thank him again later, we kissed and then started to make out. I wasn't like that before, but when we made out, I didn't feel that emptiness for a moment and that I liked. But I wasn't ready to sleep with him and he got angry. So I just told him he can tell everyone we'd sex and yes he did. But I feared to got to attached to him, to care about him, so the next day I made out with someone other. And after just a few days, I got my reputation and it got easier to get a new guy everyday. I told each of them, they could tell the whole school whatever they wanted. I didn't care. And now everyone just thinks of me as a slut. Until I met you. You were different. You didn't see me like that and I liked it. And I liked spending time with you. And when we got carried away at the pool and I forgot about practice I realized I cared. And I was afraid you'd leave me, like my parents left. For me it was better to push you away than to let you leave. But than Caroline screamed at me and you looked so disappointed and it was all to much. I broke down again, unsure what to do. So I called Dr. Fell and she told me it was okay to let you in. It was a risk I had to take.
I told everything to Care, because I couldn't leave her. And then I came here.''
I looked him in the eyes.
'' And when I got here, I knew I made the right choice. It had only been one day, and I already missed you. And so we got here.''
He hugged me again.
'' I'm really glad you came. Thank you. I understand you now. And just that you know, I'm not planning on leaving soon.''
I still wanted to tell him so much more. How I felt about him and what I wanted.
But it wasn't the right time now and I knew that. So I had to wait for a bit.
First of all I am so sorry. I just re-read the other chapters and found really a lot of spelling mistakes. I have no idea why I haven't seen them the first time I re-read the chapters. But I tried to correct all of them and I also updated the corrected versions. So again I'm really sorry for that.
So Elena finally told Damon. I know some of you expected it to lead into a kiss or something like that, but for me it just didn't feel right. She was vulnerable in that moment and Damon would have taken advantage of that. So no kiss. But it's a DELENA story. So a kiss is coming :D The question is just, when is it coming? ;D
Thank you for the love 3
R&R as always.
Love PrincessNeens
And follow me on twitter if you like my story: PrincessNeens