I am finally happy with this chapter. I absolutely love writing the SQ family. I have also written some more beautiful moments between Mommy Regina and Charlie, as my gift to you :) A word of WARNING: something scary is going to happen…nothing graphic. But, I will say my writing description of FEAR did cause me to have a panic attack. I had to wait almost an hour before I was able to resume writing. If you suffer from panic attacks, like me, you may not want to read when you come to: %%%%%%%. Once you see this indicator again I believe that it safe to resume reading. I hope that you will all continue to read until the end of this chapter. I believe the ending is very satisfying, it's something that many of you have expressed hope for. I am so proud of Emma. This is not the end of the story, just a turning point.
Emma awakens the next morning to the sound of her daughter crying. This takes her a minute to register, because she had been in such a deep sleep. Once she realizes that the sound she hears is her child, she goes into panic mode.
"Regina!" Emma startles the older woman, who had also been in deep slumber, awake. "Something's wrong," she says, jumping up from her reclined position.
Somehow, Regina is the first one in Charlie's bedroom. "Okay, sweetie, it's okay," Regina attempts to calm the upset child. She gently presses her lips to the tiny girl's forehead, a trick she learned when Henry was little; that's how she was always able to tell when her son had a fever. "Emma, she's burning up."
"I'll get the thermometer," Emma confirms, before exiting the room.
The blonde woman is on a mission. She rushes to the bathroom where the thermometer is normally kept, in the medicine cabinet above the sink. After locating it, she returns to Charlie's bedroom. Regina is sitting on the bed, holding the crying child to her chest in an attempt to comfort her. "Hey kid, I need you to hold real still for just a minute." Emma places the sensor just inside Charlie's ear. At that, Charlie starts crying again. Her blonde mother reacts without thinking. "Shit!"
"Emma!" Regina scolds.
"I'm sorry," Emma responds. She feels embarrassed for using profanity around a toddler.
Regina inquires, "What is it?"
"One hundred and three," Emma answers. "I'll get her a cold wash cloth and something to reduce the fever."
"My poor girl," Regina says, as she rocks her unhappy daughter in her lap.
"'Gina," Charlie quietly says. She feels better, or at least more comfortable, just being in her brunette mother's arms.
"I'm right here sweetie, I've got you." Regina thinks to herself: I will never let you go again.
Emma returns with the promised medication, plus crackers and ginger ale. "She can't take it on an empty stomach. Can you..?" Emma is clearly panicking; this is evident in her voice and her movements.
Regina knows that her daughter needs at least one of her mothers to remain calm in this situation. She evenly states, "I'll take care of it."
Relieved, Emma responds, "Thank you. I'm going to call her pediatrician's office." Emma exits the room.
Expert mommy, Regina calmly explains to her daughter, "Charlie, I need you to eat a few of these crackers so you can take your medicine. Okay?"
"I don't want to," Charlie whines.
With unwavering patience, Regina continues to calmly explain to her daughter, "I know, sweetie, you're throat is probably very sore, but you need to eat so you can take some medicine. This is very important."
"That's my girl," Regina says, with a smile, when Charlie begins eating the first cracker. "Just one more, Charlie, and then you can take some medicine to make you feel better," Regina encourages. As she opens the child-proof cap on the bottle of Children's Tylenol, she asks, "Do you like cherry flavor?"
The little girl nods in response.
"I do too," Regina admits as she pours red liquid into the accompanying small, plastic measuring cup.
Emma re-enters the room with some news. "I just spoke to the receptionist at her pediatrician's office."
Regina inquires, "What did they say?"
"They said they could fit her in this morning. We should probably leave now."
Regina redirects her attention to her daughter. "Okay sweetie, we need to get you dressed so you can go see the doctor."
"No, 'Gina," Charlie cries. The little girl's anxiety breaks her brunette mother's heart.
"I'm sorry, baby. Mommy and I just want to make you feel better and we need your doctor's help."
Emma admires how naturally Regina reassures their daughter.
The pitiful child honestly asks, "Do I have to get a shot?"
"Probably not." Regina is not going to lie to her clever child by telling her that she definitely will not have to get a shot. She decides to try a different tactic to earn her daughter's trust. "But, if you have to get a shot, then I will get a shot too."
That is so sweet, Emma thinks to herself.
"And, so will Mommy," Regina adds, making eye contact with Emma.
"Hey!" The blonde woman fakes offense by being included in the shot scenario.
Regina smiles playfully at the blonde woman she's grown to adore.
This makes Charlie giggle. "Okay," she agrees and lets Regina dress her.
They are now sitting in the exam room, waiting for the doctor. Emma and Regina are seated side by side in adult sized chairs. Charlie decided that she didn't want to sit on the exam table or the child sized chair. She is currently curled up in her new favorite spot, in Regina's lap.
An unwelcomed text message interrupts the comfortable silence. Emma, feels a wave of panic rip through her as she glances at the new message from Chris.
Where are you?
Regina, seeing how suddenly pale her girlfriend had become, asks, "Are you alright?"
Emma decides to ignore the fact that Regina is probably referring to the text message. She keeps the focus on their daughter. "It's probably nothing. I just want to make sure that it's nothing."
She types back a response.
I'm at the pediatrician's office with Charlie. I'm sorry I forgot to let you know. I left in such a hurry this morning.
Regina attempts to comfort her clearly nervous girlfriend, "I'm sure it's just a cold. But, you're doing the right thing. She could have an ear infection, in which case she needs the doctor to prescribe her antibiotics."
Another text from Chris arrives.
When will you be home?
She had not yet allowed her mind to contemplate returning to her existence with Chris. She had been so content, staying in the present moments, with Regina and Charlie. She feels herself start to cry as she repeats in her mind: I don't want to go back. I don't want to go back. I don't want to go back. Numbly, she types out her response.
I'm not sure how much longer this will take, maybe an hour.
She really doesn't want to go back, ever.
Emma attempts to ignore the bile rising in her throat and focus on the vision sitting next to her, Regina with their child in her arms. "I'm really glad you're here." That was actually a very loaded statement. Emma had longed for her partner's presence since their daughter's conception.
"Everything's going to be alright." That statement also holds a deeper promise. Regina desires, more than anything, to make things right in Emma and Charlie's life from now on.
The doctor enters. She is about Emma's age, but the glasses make her look younger. She has light brown hair, pulled back in a loose pony-tail and she greets the family with a smile. "Hi, Charlie," she warmly addresses the child. "You're not feeling well?"
Charlie ignores the young doctor.
"She's just being shy," Charlie's, slightly embarrassed, brunette mother responds.
Charlie just buries her face further into her brunette mother's chest.
"Let's get her on the exam table, so I can take a look at her." The young doctor readies her stethoscope as Regina attempts to place her daughter on the table.
"Okay, sweetie, I'm just going to put you down for one minute," her brunette mother explains.
"No," Charlie whines as she grips her mother tighter.
"I won't let go, I promise. The doctor just needs to examine you. I'm right here," Regina reassures.
Emma is so moved by the tenderness Regina shows their child, she almost has to leave the exam room. Desiring to not cause a scene and worry Regina, Emma remains and lets her gorgeous, composed girlfriend continue to talk to the doctor; she feels incapable of handling a situation that requires rational thought at this moment. Luckily, Regina is too distracted with Charlie to notice how emotional her girlfriend had become.
After the doctor has completed the exam, she addresses Regina; Emma remains hiding in the background. "There is built up fluid in her ear, which would explain the pain, but I see no sign of infection. Just continue the Children's Tylenol every four hours to keep her fever down, and let the cold run its course. Also, make sure she drinks plenty of fluids. Has she had any diarrhea?"
"Yes, this morning," Emma pipes up.
Regina turns to look at Emma, immediately concerned about her girlfriend's well-being.
The doctor continues, "Even more important to make sure she doesn't become dehydrated. You did the right thing bringing her in. Just continue monitoring her and call me if there are any new symptoms or if her current symptoms worsen."
"Thank you, Doctor," say Regina, scooping her sick child into her arms.
"Thank you," Emma says, following Regina's lead.
"You feel better Charlie," says the young doctor, gently patting Charlie's back.
"I'm going to take this one home and make up a bed for her on the downstairs couch. She loves sleeping down there; she can watch her favorite movies on the big screen," Emma says, opening the door to her yellow bug, so Regina can put a very sleep little girl in her car seat.
"You're a natural mother, Emma."
"Well, I do have your memories from when Henry was a toddler."
There is a moment of awkward silence.
Regina can sense that something is unquestionably bothering her girlfriend. "Sweetheart, are you alright?"
Emma looks up with watery eyes and says, "I really hate this part."
"Hey," Regina softly says as she lightly cups Emma's face in her hands. "I'll see you tonight. Right?"
The blonde somehow manages to control her tears and nods.
"What time do you want me to be at your house?"
"Four o'clock?"
"Okay. I'll see you in less than six hours."
"I'll make us dinner and you can spend time with Charlie."
"You? Cook?" Regina is thoroughly amused by Emma's ambition.
Feigning offense, Emma responds, "Yeah. Why?"
Regina plays along. "Nothing, it's just that according to our son you can't even make scrambled eggs."
Not missing a beat, Emma responds enthusiastically, "Hey, I do just fine in the kitchen now."
Does Emma realize that she set herself up? Regina cannot let this opportunity pass. She reminds her girlfriend, "That's only because of the false memories I gave you, dear."
Damnit. I set myself up for that one. Deciding to let her attractive girlfriend win this round, Emma says the classic word of defeat, "Whatever."
"I'm cooking." She really wanted to respond, 'I win.'
"Fine."
Regina pulls her adorably frustrated girlfriend in for a kiss. "You can do the dishes."
"Wow, thanks." It's official, Emma loves sarcasm. Luckily, she has met her match in Regina Mills.
Regina breaks their kiss before the two women forget that they are in a public parking lot. "I'll see you tonight," she breathes.
Emma is not surprised to see that Chris is still awake when she returns home, just before eleven. Charlie had fallen asleep on the car ride back, so her mother has to carry the unconscious girl inside.
"Is she alright," a concerned Chris asks when he sees his wife carrying the seemingly lifeless child.
"It's just a cold. She fell asleep on the car ride home. I told her that I'd let her sleep on the couch downstairs until she feels better."
Emma carefully carries her sleeping daughter downstairs. She gently places Charlie on the couch, wraps her in a blanket, and kisses the child's forehead. She, then, regretfully heads back upstairs.
%%%%%%%
"So, she has a cold?"
Emma enters the kitchen, where Chris stands going through mail on the counter. Emma really doesn't want to, but she removes her jacket anyway and drapes it over the back of a chair near the kitchen table.
"She probably picked it up at the park yesterday from one of the other children. I was worried that it might be something worse. She woke up crying and was running a high fever this morning." Emma moves to the other side of Chris, where the drip coffee pot is located. She grabs the glass pot and begins to fill it with water.
"I'm glad she's alright," Chris says as he watches Emma fill the reservoir with water.
"I thought you'd be asleep." Emma gets out the coffee grounds, keeping her back to Chris, in an effort to avoid eye-contact.
"I can't sleep." Chris moves and stands behind his distracted wife.
"I was waiting for you to come home," he says in her ear. He pushes blonde hair out of the way and begins kissing her neck as he snakes his arms around her waist.
"Chris, don't. I'm not in the mood." It takes a great deal of effort for Emma say this; she is absolutely petrified that this might set Chris off.
Ignoring his wife's protest, he moves his hands up her shirt to grope her breasts. "Let me get you in the mood," he whispers creepily into her ear.
To say that she is extremely uncomfortable would be an understatement. She is in full-blown panic attack mode. She squeezes her eyes shut and begs. "Don't."
He continues to fondle her as he says, "You did leave in a hurry this morning didn't you?"
It is becoming difficult for her to breathe.
"Easier access for me," he says, grabbing the hem of her shirt.
She feels like her heart might pound out of her chest.
She stiffens completely when she feels her shirt being removed and thankfully, finds her voice. "Stop." She can only manage a strained whisper.
He holds her arms, tightly pinning them to her sides, completely disabling her. She cannot defend herself. She begins to cry.
"Emma, we've discussed this. You're not going to fight me are you?" He shakes her to make sure she's paying attention. "Are you?"
She just wants this to be over, so she shakes her head quickly from side to side.
His tone is forceful. "Now, stop crying." He makes another attempt to remove her shirt, allowing Emma to break free from his tight hold. She elbows him in the face and yells, "Stop!"
"Stupid bitch!"
She falls to the floor with a hard smack. That is definitely going to hurt tomorrow.
He turns her over on her back and pins her hands above her head.
"Please, don't! Please, don't!" She is crying audibly now.
He presses his face against hers. "You really don't want to fight me, Emma. It will only hurt more."
Her head is spinning out of control. "Please don't do this," she desperately cries. "Please! Please!"
Miraculously, he doesn't continue his assault. Once he moves off her, all she can do is lay there and cry. She curls into the fetal position and covers her face, wishing that she could just disappear. She's so scared to even entertain the thought that he might come back and rape her.
%%%%%%%
How did it get to this point?
She never believed that it would happen to her. The first time he hit her, after they were married, didn't come as a shock. But, she didn't leave. Emma believed that she'd be able to avoid Chris's temper as long as she didn't do anything to upset him; that meant stifling her true self. She walked on egg shells around this man. She learned never to speak if she had an opposing opinion and if she was sad, she had to hide it around him or she would pay dearly for it later. She began drinking, daily, just to survive. She realized that she could tolerate sex when she was drunk, she would be with him willingly. Chris even commented to her once that he liked her better after she'd had a few drinks. She wasn't really living; she was barely existing. Her entire persona had changed. She carried herself differently. She lost all sense of self until…Regina showed up on her doorstep.
Regina gives my heart strength. She reminds me who I am.
Emma can hear Chris moving around the house, it sounds like he's gathering some things in a bag. After a few minutes, he is once again standing over her. She prepares herself for the worst.
She flinches when she hears him say, "If you try to fight me again tonight, you will be very sorry." Then she hears him walk away and the front door slam behind him.
The blonde is too shaken to rise above a seated position.
She remains sitting on the floor and allows herself a minute to focus on her breathing. Once regulated, she reaches a trembling hand for her canvas jacket on the back of the chair. Next, she locates her phone in the jacket's left pocket.
Before she is able to dial the number, she suddenly becomes aware of a tiny figure standing in front of her.
"Mommy," Charlie timidly asks. She is hugging her stuffed lamb close to her body.
The blonde woman is not prepared for this. The thought hadn't even crossed Emma's mind that Charlie had heard the recent commotion in the kitchen.
"Hi, kid," Emma manages. Charlie begins to cry quietly. Emma gently takes the tiny child's hand and guides her into her lap. Emma protectively wraps her arms around her frightened child and kisses the top of the little girl's head. "Shhhh…baby, it's okay…it's okay. Mommy's okay." As she attempts to soothe her crying child, she realizes that she is also trying to convince herself that she is okay.
"Daddy hurt you," the little girl cries.
Shit, she heard that. There is no point trying to convince her otherwise. "Yeah, kid."
"Where's 'Gina?" She had said the magic word.
Regina is in her hotel suite, sitting on the bathroom floor, with her back propped up against the wall for support; trying to recover from a recent wave of nausea. That was unexpected. She hears her phone, which is sitting on the sink, begin to ring. She feels horrible; in no mood to talk to anyone…except this person.
"Emma?"
The relief she feels from just hearing this woman's voice causes Emma to break down immediately.
"What happened?"
Barely able to catch her breath from crying so hard, the blonde woman is unable to answer.
"Sweetheart, you're scaring me." Alarmed, Regina also begins to cry; as she pleads for her girlfriend to talk. She is unable to wait another agonizing minute. Regina announces, "Hang on Emma, I'll be there soon." She rises, with the phone still next to her ear.
A very weak voice asks, "Regina…" The brunette woman stops in her tracks. "Can Charlie and I come stay with you?"
She definitely stopped breathing. Regina can only imagine what horror Emma experienced just moments ago. The brunette's legs suddenly give out from underneath her and she collapses to her knees. She dreads hearing the answer, but she asks the question anyway, "Are you hurt?" The silence sends a shiver down Regina's spine. Voice trembling, she pleads, "Please talk to me."
The blonde woman inhales deeply and announces with absolute certainty, "I need to get out of here. I need to get Charlie out of here."
Regina struggles to keep the bile down. Rage building, she asks, "Did he…hurt Charlie?"
"No," Emma evenly states.
Instantly, the rage subsides. She calmly asks, "What happened?"
"Do you want to talk to her?"
"Give her to me," Regina numbly demands. She can hear her little girl crying quietly into the phone. Regina immediately softens. "Charlie?"
"'Gina."
Regina has to stop herself from losing all composure, realizing her responsibility to comfort her frightened child. Determined to calm her baby girl, she closes her eyes and imagines her daughter in her arms, rocking her as she says, softly and evenly, "I'm here, baby. I'm here. Everything's going to be okay, sweetie. I'm going to take care of you now, you and Mommy. I love you, Charlie." When Regina opens her eyes, she makes the realization that she had been rocking herself.
They must have a spiritual connection. At the same moment, when Regina was imagining rocking Charlie in her arms, Emma was rocking the tiny child and kissing the top of her head.
"'Gina."
That's all the confirmation Regina needs, she can tell that her soothing words affected her beloved child.
Once Regina senses that Emma has taken the phone back, she shifts her tone and firmly instructs, "Get her out that house right now, or I'm coming to get you both."
"Okay." Emma admits, she can't argue with that.
Realizing she can't possibly be upset with Emma, Regina changes her tone completely. "Emma?"
Hopefully, Emma asks, "Yeah?"
"I am so in love with you, Emma. Please, get back to me safely."
The blonde woman smiles to herself. "I will. I love you, Regina."
That phone call gave her all the strength she needs to finally leave.
"Okay baby girl, we're going to stay with Regina," Emma says, hugging her daughter tight and kissing the top of her head once more.
She helps Charlie off of her lap and attempts to stand. Her legs are extremely wobbly, still recovering from the latest panic attack.
Once she has regained balance, Emma moves quickly to gather a few essential items from the house. She digs her way to the back of the master closet and dons her signature red leather jacket that she hasn't worn in almost four years, yet could not bear to part with. Her next stop is Charlie's room. Charlie is seated on the bed, clutching her much-loved stuffed animal. Seeing this, Emma begins, "We need to take Lambie, don't we?"
"How about, Teddy?" Emma picks up a worn teddy bear.
Charlie nods her response.
The concerned mother asks, "Who else would you like to take with us?"
Charlie doesn't have to think before answering, "Kitty."
Actually, the stuffed animal to which Charlie is referring is a moose. Perhaps, Emma thinks to herself, this makes her a bad parent for not correcting Charlie about the misidentification of species. But, she admits, she doesn't care; it's too adorable.
"Of course! Kitty has to come with us!" Emma enthusiastically picks up the stuffed moose and places it in the bag, with Teddy.
Emma takes a moment to check-in with her daughter. She crouches down to Charlie's level. "Hey."
Charlie meets her mother's eyes.
Emma lightly rubs Charlie's tiny cheek with the backs of her fingers. "It's you and me kid. We got this, right?"
Charlie nods happily and throws her arms around her mother's neck. "I love you, Mommy."
Emma kisses the little girl and confirms, "I love you, Charlie." She continues to hold the tiny child as she rises from her crouched position. "Alright, baby girl, are you ready to go?"
Charlie nods her confirmation.
Emma picks up her packed bag, takes one last look around, and walks out the front door with her child.