First of all, thank you. Your response to my last update was incredible! I hope you will enjoy this chapter as much as the last ones. I just needed a little more Emma and Regina togetherness before re-introducing the rest of the family, starting with the kids. On that note, Chapter 15 is complete. I plan to have it polished and posted before the end of the week. But, I don't want to keep you wonderful people waiting any longer. Thank you for sticking with me and for loving this story. I hope this chapter makes you smile. Be prepared though…there may be some tears ahead.
It's too early to be awake. Emma wonders how it is even possible that she is up this early. There is no way she has been asleep that long. As much as she tries to fight it, her body is being guided into a conscious state by a delicate hand massaging her shoulder. Upon opening her eyes, the young woman begins to panic when she doesn't initially recognize her surroundings. Thankfully, all of her fears are calmed as she becomes aware of a tranquil, familiar voice whispering, "Emma? It's time to wake up, my love." Normally, the blonde woman would be irate at being woken up prematurely. But, if this is how she is being roused, she decides that she would welcome it every morning for the rest of her life. Upon regaining consciousness, Emma's head is already pounding. The events of the previous day and night had taken their toll on her and she has yet to recover. She turns her head toward the comforting voice, rolls onto her back, wills her eyes open and, progressively, the image of a smiling brunette comes into focus.
"Hi," the delighted woman softly greets. Evidently, Regina has been awake for some time.
"Hi," Emma's sleepy voice responds as she attempts to rub sleep from her eyes.
When the younger woman yawns and stretches, the queen instinctively covers Emma's bare chest with the palm of her hand and gently begins to massage her. Gazing upon the groggy blonde in adoration, Regina voices the contented thought running through her head. "I forgot how beautiful you are first thing in the morning."
Though the younger woman believes the comment is entirely unnecessary, it is, however, appreciated. Resting her arms above her head in encouragement, Emma flirts, "Regina, I already said 'yes' when you asked me to marry you. You don't need to say things like that."
"Yes, I do. I will never take another day with you for granted, ever again."
This comment is not taken lightly. The most beautiful words Emma Swan has ever heard have just been uttered by the woman she loves. And, what's more, these words are meant for her. The younger woman's body responds instinctively. She captures Regina's lips in passionate kiss, wrapping her arms around the older woman's neck to keep her as close as possible.
The kiss naturally intensifies as the queen desires more contact and her hand becomes involuntarily bolder.
Relishing the older woman's touch, Emma voices her current state of bliss. "I missed this."
The queen smiles contentedly against the younger woman's lips. "Me too," she whispers in response. What she originally intended to be a display of affection, quickly escalates into something more. Her body seems to be acting independently of her will.
Perceiving Regina's intentions, the younger woman voices her observation, "So that's why you woke me up." Admittedly, if she hadn't been only half-awake, she never would have made such a thoughtless comment.
The older woman abruptly halts her movements and her eyes widen in horror. The queen wonders how she could be so careless, knowing what this woman has endured.
Incredibly confused as to why Regina has suddenly withdrawn her advances, Emma inquires, "What's wrong?"
Just a moment before Regina succeeds in removing herself from the bed entirely, she is gently stopped by a mild hand on her forearm.
"Regina?"
Ashamed by her actions, the older woman attempts to keep her face hidden from her concerned lover. "I-I-I'm sorry."
Inching closer to Regina, so she is now almost on the edge of the bed, Emma encourages, "Hey. It's okay. Whatever's wrong, you can tell me."
Sensing Emma's close proximity to the bed's edge, Regina braces the younger woman to keep her from falling. "I just…knowing what you've been through…"
A startling realization hits. The comment that Emma intended to be flirtatious, Regina had taken to heart. "What?"
"I didn't mean to…make you feel like…you have to…"
"Wait." Emma wonders if it is possible that Regina is comparing herself to a man who took advantage of her time and time again. There is no way that she will allow the woman who takes her breath away every time she sees her to beat herself up over a misunderstanding. "Regina…how can you? You never…" But, her emotions overtake her before she can finish her explanation.
"Emma?"
She decides to speak from the heart. The woman who is her everything deserves to know. "I have never felt this way with anyone, the way I feel when I'm with you."
Regina immediately grasps the younger woman's hands in her own, demonstrating her support.
Still unable to meet Regina's eyes, Emma makes the next admission. "I don't hate myself anymore." She begins to cry. She wasn't expecting to make this admission today. She wasn't even aware of the truth until this very moment.
The queen intuitively clutches the emotional woman's face, in an effort re-establish eye-contact.
"I did for a long time," the younger woman continues as she struggles to come to terms with her recent realization.
The queen responds by gently wiping away Emma's tears with her thumbs.
Noticeably, the younger woman is soothed by her lover's comforting touch, enough to meet her eyes as she makes the next confession. "I can heal now, because the most amazing woman in all the realms loves me."
Now, the queen is outwardly crying; she is not even going to try to hide it. She kisses the blonde woman in confirmation and secures her in her in a comforting embrace in understanding.
Clinging to the older woman, Emma finds the courage she needs to continue. As she feels herself being rocked, Emma explains, "When you touch me…it feels right. Because of you I can live again. You make me whole."
When Emma straightens up to meet Regina's glassy eyes, the queen effortlessly tucks rebellious blonde hairs behind the younger woman's ear. "How do you do that?"
"What?"
"Just when I think it's not possible for me to love you any more, you make me fall more in love with you."
"Thank you for loving me so much."
"It's impossible for me not to love you. You are my life, Emma Swan."
"Regina."
"I can't wait until we are married."
"We are, Regina. I don't need a piece of paper to tell me that you're my wife. I'm already married to you, in my heart." The vow is sealed with a chaste kiss. Relaxing, once again, in her lover's arms, Emma voices something that has been on her mind since she drifted off to sleep, less than six hours ago. "You were incredible last night."
"You were magnificent."
The older woman's comment is met with uncertainty. Emma's questioning gaze is unmistakable. The younger woman's insecurities won't let her accept the sincere compliment.
The queen attempts to solidify her previous conviction, as she searches her vocabulary for the appropriate word. "I'm serious, Emma. You were…"
Sensing Regina's loss for the adequate term, realization hits. Emma affirms the adjective that essentially describes her state the previous night. "Comfortable." The younger woman re-directs her attention toward the stunned brunette. "I have always felt comfortable with you, Regina. And because I was comfortable, I could be confident. You make me feel confident." She is on a roll now. "Because of you, I finally feel comfortable in my own skin. I'm not afraid to be who I am anymore…because I'm with you."
The queen is noticeably struggling to get a handle on Emma's most recent confession. For a moment she is silent, once again searching for the right words to express the gratitude in her heart.
The shocked silence overtaking the woman she loves gives Emma grounds for great concern. "Are you okay?"
The astonished woman finds her voice. Though her words are trembling, she responds truthfully. "You have no idea what that means to me."
If that wasn't enough, Regina's vulnerability inspires Emma to make an even braver confession. "I never…" Emma pauses temporarily, uncertain if she should continue. She has already started, Emma thinks, might as well continue. "I never thought I'd be able to enjoy sex again." When Regina expression contorts in confusion, the younger woman fears that she has said too much. "I'm sorry. I just made it weird."
Regina shakes her head in an attempt to clear it of the multitude of emotions overtaking her. She inhales deeply before speaking. "No you didn't."
If Emma didn't know any better, she might have mistaken Regina's tone as one of revulsion.
Thankfully, Regina puts a stopper on any doubts overtaking the younger woman by enveloping Emma in a desperate embrace. "My darling, I love you! I love you so much!"
With her arms wrapped securely around the older woman's shoulders, Emma speaks softly through unshed tears. "I love you too."
The two women continue to hold each other in contented silence for another minute before gradually separating, but still maintaining contact. The queen is the first to speak. "You really did enjoy it?"
"Yeah," Emma whispers, and offers a warm smile. Unexpectedly to both of them, the older woman breaks and buries her face in her hands to quiet her sobs. "Regina, don't cry." The younger woman soothes as she swaddles a doubled-over Regina in her arms. "I'm an idiot."
"No," Regina protests. Watery, blood-shot eyes meet blue. "Emma, no. You're not." The queen lightly cups Emma's cheek in her tear soaked hand. "I was so afraid..."
The sincerity in the older woman's eyes and in her voice causes a few tears to fall from blue eyes.
"I want my wife to enjoy sex," Regina announces.
The younger woman only beams at Regina in response. Her smile could outshine the sun.
Wiping a few stray tears from Emma's face with the pad of her thumb, the queen acknowledges, "Thank you…for telling me."
"I just thought you should know."
"I'm just relieved that you're alright." She offers Emma a tender kiss in grateful response. The emotionally exhausted woman nestles in her lover's arms and joins her hand with Emma's, lacing their fingers together. "How did you sleep?"
"I think I slept okay…but I'm still exhausted."
Completely content, watching their fingers dance together, the queen informs, "You only got six hours, at most."
The younger woman halts her movements. "Whose idea was it to wake up this early?"
"Yours," Regina, hesitantly, answers.
"Aghhhh," the blonde woman complains.
"Come on, we're going to see Henry today," a giggling Regina urges. "I can't wait to tell him our news."
"Do you think he'll be happy to see me?"
"I know he will." The sincerity in the older woman's tone is instantly recognizable.
Re-joining their hands and holding her lover's gaze, Emma makes a sincere request. "Can we just stay like this? Just you and me…for a little while?"
Avoiding eye contact and with noticeable regret in her voice, the queen attempts to let the younger woman down easy. "Emma…"
"You're right. The kids."
"Our children are waiting for us."
"And now we're about to add a third."
"Do you feel pregnant, yet?"
"It's still too early to tell." Emma watches her lover's face fall. "But, I wouldn't be surprised if I have a tiny bun in the oven soon."
The queen noticeably brightens. "My tiny bun," she whispers.
"I know we did things backwards, Regina…having kids first, I mean. But, I wouldn't want it any other way."
"I wouldn't want it any other way, either." Regina confirms her statement with a tender kiss. "Are you feeling alright?"
"Honestly? I feel awful…and I have a massive headache."
"You need some caffeine."
"Shit."
"What's wrong?"
"I'm trying to get pregnant. I should probably stop drinking caffeine."
"I don't think one cup would hurt."
Making sure to look Regina directly in the eye, Emma declares, "I am so in love with you right now."
The queen smiles playfully, gives Emma peck on the lips, and immediately springs out of bed.
"Where are you going?"
"To make some coffee," Regina announces, retrieving her robe that is draped over a nearby chair and donning it. "You stay in bed, I'll be right back."
The amorous younger woman's eyes travel with her lover to the kitchen area. "Is this what my life is going to be like, married to you?"
"You mean am I going to spoil you? Of course I am," Regina replies as she fills the reservoir of the coffeemaker with water.
Returning to the bed that they share, the older woman holds her lover's gaze as she removes her robe. The blonde woman verifies, "I could get used to this."
Regina carefully settles herself as close to her fiancé as physically possible. "You need some breakfast too."
"I have to agree with you there, I think I just heard my stomach growl."
Filled with thoughts of her unborn child, the queen comfortably rests her hand on Emma's abdomen. "I think I still have a bagel in the fridge, or I could run downstairs and get you something," she suggests.
"Regina, relax. I'm fine."
"Are you sure?"
"This is all I need right now."
Regina gives herself permission to rest her head against the younger woman's shoulder. "I never dared dream that I could be this happy," she openly admits.
"How did you sleep?"
"Actually, I didn't get much sleep last night," the queen sheepishly confesses.
"Damnit. Was I snoring?"
Classic Emma, Regina recalls fondly. "Maybe a little bit. But I thought it was cute."
"I'm sorry. Did it keep you up?"
She is caught. No matter how she answers this question, it will be a lie. Even though she knows all too well that Emma will call her on it, the queen proceeds with the lie of omission anyway. "No. Your snoring didn't keep me awake."
"You're doing that thing again."
Busted. "What?"
"You're not telling me the truth."
"That was the truth. Your snoring didn't keep me awake."
"Regina…"
The queen repositions herself; sitting up straight this time, and completely averting her eyes. "After we got back last night, I couldn't relax enough to sleep."
"Why not?"
"I was worried that…you might stop breathing."
"Regina! Why didn't you just wake me?"
Becoming agitated, the queen hastily admits, "I thought I did wake you once, by accident, when I checked you because you stopped snoring."
"That was you! I thought it was a dream," Emma replies, becoming entirely too excited.
Attempting to real the conversation back in, Regina softens her tone. "I'm sorry, Emma."
The younger woman calms slightly and approaches Regina with sincerity in her manner. "You were worried sick." The concern is obvious, which is what allows the queen to make an incredibly vulnerable admission.
"Now that we're finally together I have something to lose." Her eyes betray her, filling with un-shed tears and she can barely continue the rest of her confession before breaking. "I just love you so much." This time, Emma recognizes, that she needs to be the strong one.
Catching Regina in a secure hold, Emma confirms what Regina already knows to be true. "I love you too."
"Emma, I'm scared," she wails.
Reducing the volume of her voice to barely above a whisper, the younger woman soothes, "It's okay to be scared. I'm scared too. But, you are not going to lose me, Regina…ever. I promise."
"I can't," the older woman continues to cry.
Emma hugs the older woman tighter before speaking. "You won't. We will always be together, from now on." When she feels Regina nod her understanding, Emma slowly breaks the tender embrace, separating their bodies enough to meet the other woman's eyes. "It means everything that you feel comfortable sharing your fears with me. I know that's not easy for you."
"Except it is…because it's you. I feel an overwhelming compulsion to be honest with you."
Cradling the older woman's face in her hands, the younger woman offers some reassurance, "I swear to you, I will never betray that trust."
The queen nods her understanding. "I know."
Emma brings her hand down to join it with Regina's. Holding both of the older woman's hands in a show of support, Emma expresses genuine concern. "Are you okay?"
"I'm okay," Regina sniffles.
"You don't need to worry any more, Regina. Because of you, I'm safe. Nothing bad is going to happen to me." She was planning to stop there, but she recognizes that wouldn't be sufficient. Regina's fear runs far deeper than that. Though it pains her to admit to herself that her actions have caused Regina the most pain, she decides to address the injury she has caused. "And, I am never leaving you again."
"My love." The older woman quickly wraps her arms around Emma's shoulders, desperately needing to keep her lover close to her heart.
Content to hold Regina in her arms for the rest of her life, Emma concedes, "I'm yours, forever."
They just continue to hold each other for another minute. Neither woman is ready to lose the life-saving contact.
Though she feels drained after their latest discussion, the queen has also never felt more relieved.
"You must be exhausted," Emma observes.
"I'll be fine…once I've had some coffee," the older woman replies, as she casually wipes away her tears.
Remembering the coffee, Emma adds enthusiastically, "I bet it's ready."
"I think you're right." The hopeful woman rises out of bed and, once again, dons her silver robe. "I'll be right back."
"Okay." The younger woman smiles in contentment and watches the remarkable woman drain the contents of the ridiculously small coffee pot into two cups, walk over to the fridge to retrieve what appears to be creamer, and add that to the brew before returning.
Accepting the offered beverage, the younger woman expresses her gratitude. "Thank you for making it."
The older woman sets her cup on the nightstand. "You are very welcome, my love." She removes her robe and carefully settles next to the blonde woman.
"What time is check-out?"
Regina takes a sip of the life-giving liquid before answering. "Noon. But, we need to be out of here well before then."
It becomes clear in Emma's expression that she has other ideas, though she is too embarrassed to come right out and say it. She attempts to subtly make her proposition. "Maybe…we could…have a little fun first."
The queen gulps down her current sip of coffee. Of course she knows what Emma intends, but she decides to make her work for it...at least, a little bit. "I thought you had a headache."
Exhaling a deep breath, the younger woman decides to be direct in her proposal. "Regina, we are currently sharing a hotel room, without any kids, it's only a little after eight a.m., and…I have never been more attracted to you than I am right now."
The queen raises an eyebrow at the prospect. "I see your point."
"Besides…" The younger woman inches closer and whispers in the older woman's ear. "I still owe you for last night."
The queen blushes and a goofy grin spreads across her face. "Emma." Adopting a serious tone, the queen assures. "You don't owe me anything."
Without meeting Regina's eyes, Emma begins. "Okay, how about this?" Reclaiming eye contact, the blonde woman makes a bold proposal. "I am going to blow your freaking mind, Regina Mills." When a wide-eyed Regina doesn't respond, Emma tries a different tactic to gain confirmation. "Sound good?"
Apparently, that was direct enough. "Uh-hu," is all the older woman can manage; plus, a nod.
Emma captures the stunned woman's lips in an enticing kiss and purrs against them. "Care to join me for a shower?"
Without waiting for a response, Emma promptly climbs out of bed and saunters to the bathroom; leaving the still stunned brunette in her wake. She is thoroughly satisfied with herself and, more importantly, she feels like herself again.
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The pair has been sitting in a parked Mercedes, unable to leave the lot for nearly ten minutes.
In between smothering kisses, the queen attempts to remind the blonde woman of their reason for being in the vehicle. "Emma…I have to drive…and so do you."
"I thought you liked fogged windows," Emma breathless reminds.
"Honey…we have to go."
Since Regina is so intent on speaking, Emma decides to focus her attention on the older woman's neck instead. "But, I don't want to take separate cars."
Regina's eyes automatically close in ecstasy and she instantly becomes mindful of the moisture accumulating between her legs. "I know, my love." She has to stifle a moan. "Believe me, I know. I never want to be separated from you again," she pants.
"Please, don't make me let go of you." The younger woman buries her face in Regina's neck and holds her tightly around the waist.
"Sweetheart," the panting woman gulps. "We need to get your car back to Storybrooke."
Sobering slightly, Emma pulls back. She has to make a decision quickly. "Maybe I could just leave it here."
"Emma, you love that car," Regina asserts.
"I love this one more. My favorite memories were made in this car."
Regina moves in slowly, stopping only a centimeter from the younger woman's lips, and proposes; in between feather kisses, "Maybe we could make another one…in your car…when we get home."
Emma pulls back to meet the older woman's hazy eyes. "Why do I get the distinct feeling that you've been harboring a secret crush on my yellow bug all these years?"
Resuming her previous position, the older woman utters sensually, "I believe you wanted to be on top this time. Correct?"
Emma presses her lips firmly against the older woman's. "You really need to stop being so sexy or we're checking-in for the night."
"I can't believe how much I missed kissing you." The older woman's lips are slightly swollen and she honestly doesn't know why she bothered to apply lipstick this morning. It didn't even last the elevator ride to the lobby this morning.
"Okay, seriously. You need stop saying things like that." Emma captures supple lips once again.
"Emma…Emma," the queen half-heartedly protests.
The blonde woman breaks the kiss, only long enough to speak. "And, my name. You should probably stop saying my name."
"I'll see you in less than an hour," the queen breathlessly interjects.
"That's too long."
"Honey, we have to go. It's almost eleven and we still need to drive to Sylvia's. We should have left over an hour ago." Regina attempts to compose herself. She starts by pulling down the sun visor and examining her make-up in the mirror.
"But, I enjoyed taking advantage of that huge suite and putting the Do Not Disturb sign to good use. Admit it, you had fun."
Refocusing her attention on the younger woman, Regina affirms, "You have no idea what you do to me."
"Trust me Regina. I know exactly what I do to you…if the shower was indication." She fondly recalls excessive, high-pitched moaning, that if she wasn't there to witness it, she never would have believed such sounds came out of Regina Mills.
Apparently, Regina has the same realization in this moment. Emma Swan is the only person who has ever or could ever get that kind of response from the queen. "Damnit, we're never getting out of this parking lot." The regal woman grasps Emma's face with both hands and kisses her with unbridled passion.
"Good. I'm nowhere near ready to let go of you."
"I didn't even want to put clothes on this morning."
"You look amazing in this dress, by the way."
"Thank you. I hoped you'd like it."
"You want me to find you irresistible."
"Mmmm…maybe."
"Are you sure you're not trying to kill me?"
Regina only smiles against Emma's lips in delight.
Another minute goes by and the queen reluctantly reminds, "You're going to forget all about your coffee again."
"Ugh, you're right." The younger woman unwillingly takes a minute to catch her breath and re-directs her attention to the thermos Regina so conveniently provided, resting in the cup holder.
"Is it cold?"
Emma takes a careful sip, fully expecting the coffee to be an undesirable temperature. "Surprisingly, no." She takes a second sip of the warm beverage. "I still can't believe you brewed a second pot."
"It was only fair since I distracted you this morning," she says, as she meticulously reapplies her lipstick.
"You are too good to me."
Flipping the visor to its previous position, Regina asserts, "I only treat you the way you deserve to be treated."
"You spoil me."
"Is that okay?"
"I love you."
"I love you."
Their lips naturally find each other, connecting in a tender kiss.
"Do you still have a headache?"
"Kind of. It's moved," the younger woman adds, massaging her left temple. "I'm worried that it's going to turn into a migraine."
A look of deep concern immediately overtakes Regina's expression. "Maybe we shouldn't go to New York today."
"No, we have to go! We told Henry we would be there. I won't let him down again."
"He would understand."
"I am going to see my son today." She quickly corrects herself. "Our son."
The thoughtless comment obviously stung, but Regina decides to let it roll off. She is so secure in her relationship with Emma that she doesn't even have to wonder if this comment holds any bitterness.
"I'll just take some aspirin and I'll be fine," Emma offers as a temporary solution.
"I don't want you to push yourself." The look of concern is back.
"Regina. I'll be fine."
"Okay." Though she still thinks it's a bad idea, the queen accepts Emma's decision. "I think I have some aspirin," she adds, rifling through her purse. "Would you like one or two?"
"Just one for now." She takes the offered aspirin. "Thank you."
"You're welcome."
"This coffee is actually pretty tasty. I'm surprised. I usually don't care for the coffee they have in hotel rooms. What did you put in it?"
"I actually brought this coffee from home. I like this brand. And, I added a little French vanilla creamer for flavor."
"I thought I recognized it," Emma reacts with a childlike enthusiasm. When she catches Regina staring at her in adoration, the younger woman suddenly becomes aware of the silliness of her own response. "What?"
The queen beams at the younger woman. "You're adorable."
"Regina. Stop, you're making me blush."
"That was my goal."
"To make me paranoid?"
"No, silly. To make you smile."
"I love your smile."
"Emma…"
"Seriously, Regina. When you smile…just please don't ever lose that smile."
"I have you back. I'll never lose this smile again."
"I missed you."
"I missed you too. We should leave now. Once we're back home, in Storybrooke, we never have to be separated again."
"You promise?"
"You sound like our daughter."
"That makes sense."
"I promise. Everything's going to be alright. Is your phone fully charged? I can talk to you the whole drive to Sylvia's." Regina watches the younger woman's face fall.
"Okay," she timidly replies.
"It's alright, Emma. I'll be right behind you." The queen only hopes that her words are re-assuring.
Just as the younger woman opens the passenger side door to exit the vehicle, she is stopped by the most beautiful voice she has ever heard. "Emma?"
"Yes?"
"Remember to wear your seatbelt."
Only, these words hold so much more meaning than what is actually spoken, for both women. Thankfully, Emma understands with only a single look into Regina's warm brown eyes.
"I will."