Richelle Mead owns the VA and Bloodlines series.

This one shot is actually a deleted scene from Of Magic and Misery (which I swear I WILL update soon). It's from Chapter 8, if you've read that story it's where Sydney and Adrian are doing a spell to locate Marcus. The scene in the story is the one I originally planned out, but while writing it... well, Adrian went a little spirit crazy on me and I ended up with this. And I turned it into a one shot. There are bits and pieces of a kissing scene from later on in here also (because they weren't supposed to kiss until MUCH later in the story), so if some stuff seems familiar it's because it was recycled.

Anyway, let me know what you think!

I hadn't thought my night would go like this.

When Adrian had first suggested I use the location spell Ms. Terwilliger had taught me in order to find Marcus Finch I'd been excited. I'd be able to find Marcus directly, instead of asking around or searching the Alchemist database. I hadn't been having much luck with either, so Adrian's suggestion was almost a relief. But, I'd figured Ms. Terwilliger would be the one to help me cast it, not Adrian.

Unfortunately, Ms. Terwilliger had a teacher's conference this weekend and couldn't make it. The only other person in Palm Springs who knew about my magic was Adrian, so I'd been forced to call him for help.

We'd been setting up everything we'd need for the spell, but it was still half an hour until midnight. Half an hour until the spell could be performed. Adrian had suggested sitting in the car, seeing as it was so cold out.

It wasn't that I wasn't grateful for Adrian's help, or even uncomfortable around him. Actually, I was glad things were getting better between us. We had even been joking around with one another. Things had been so difficult lately that it had felt nice, like it used to. Ever since the kiss he'd avoided me. But we'd only just started fixing our relationship, so sitting in his Mustang, late at night, in the middle of the desert, just the two of us, may have been a little more than either of us could handle. The tension in the air was apparent, even to me.

So when Adrian had innocently reached out to warm my hands in his I think it had taken us both by surprise.

His larger hand swallowed mine, instantly warming it from the cold that I'd just felt from setting up the ingredients for the spell. But before I could even think enough to say something or pull my hands away, Adrian was already doing both.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, sounding as if he truly were sorry. He sounded so distraught I turned to look at him. He leaned his head back and looked at the ceiling. "I didn't mean to... No touching. That's what we said."

We had said that. If our new relationship was going to work, then boundaries had to be set, for both parties. But he just looked so upset...

"It's okay," I said, feeling a deep need to comfort him. "Nothing happened. Nothing's wrong. We're okay."

He shook his head gently. The leather of the seat groaned with the movement. "I don't think we'll ever be okay, Sage. Not while you keep denying—"

"I'm not denying anything!" I interrupted, suddenly angry. Why did he have to start? We were having an okay time, we were friends again! Why did he have to ruin it?

Adrian tilted his head so he could see me. "Okay, so let's talk about what you're not denying, then."

I opened my mouth, but nothing came out at first. Finally, I shook my head. "I should never have asked you to come along. I can do this spell myself."

"Why?" Adrian asked, sitting up. "Because you don't want to talk about us? You'd rather be out here all alone then talk to me about whatever this–" he gestured between the two of us "–is?"

"There is no us, Adrian!" I hated him. Why couldn't he just leave it alone? "There can never be an us! No matter what you want. Okay? Please! Let it go."

He laughed, but there was no humor in it. "I want to, Sage. I really do." The ugliest sneer crossed his beautiful face and it broke my heart that I'd put it there. "Do you think I like being the idiot who keeps falling for unavailable girls? Do you think I do this to myself on purpose?"

"Adrian—"

"Don't Adrian me! Talk to me." He reached out to touch my shoulder, but thought better of it. "Please? Just this once. We're all alone, middle of the desert. No one will hear and tattle on you. Please, just talk to me."

"What do you want me to say?" I asked, helplessly throwing my arms up and letting them fall back into my lap. "It won't change things."

His soft, kissable lips pressed into a thin unhappy line. "I don't know what's worse," he muttered. "Loving Rose, who never loved me back at all and used me anyway, or loving you, and knowing that the only reason we're not together is because of what I am."

"Adrian." I could practically see the spirit darkness beginning to swirl around him. I wanted to comfort him, to say it didn't matter what he was, didn't matter that he was Moroi. That it didn't bother me anymore. But that was a lie. Him being Moroi was the only reason we weren't together. I knew in my heart that if he were some human guy, we'd be happy right now instead of fighting. "I'm sorry," was all I could tell him.

He gave me a tight smile. "Will you at least do me one favor?" He reached out and cupped my cheek, the one with the lily on it. Heat licked up my body as he traced the lines of my tattoo. "When you find a guy you do like, someone you love... Love him with all of your heart. Please don't let the Alchemists dictate your life forever."

The entire time he'd been talking I had already known what I was going to do. I'd known since the moment he'd reached out to touch my cheek. Part of me wondered if I'd known since I'd asked him to help me with the spell. It wasn't a smart decision, it wasn't the right decision. Neither of us were in the right state of mind for this. But the second Adrian's lips stopped moving I took my chance.

I leaned forward and touched my lips to his.

Little electric jolts shot down my spine, warming me from the inside out. Instinctively, I moved my lips on his, pressing harder when he failed to respond. I wasn't thinking, I had stopped thinking the moment his fingers touched my face. Now those fingers started moving, tracing the curve of my jaw before tangling in my hair. His mouth parted slightly and he sucked my bottom lip in between his lips. I would've been embarrassed of the way it made me moan, but he was already pressing into me, leaning me back against the passenger side door.

I wasn't sure how he managed it with the console in between us, but he'd somehow found his way from the drivers seat halfway into the passenger seat with me. His hands skimmed down my arms and back up again, then moved to my sides. Up and down, up and down, finally grasping my waist and pulling me closer.

I loved the way this felt. The fire burning inside of me at his touch, the way my lips tingled from his kisses. The utter rightness of his body next to mine. How had I denied myself of this for so long?

I ran my hand down his back, tracing his spine with my fingers. He sighed against my lips, and my tongue darted into his mouth. I hadn't done this with Brayden. We'd kissed, but it was never this intense. Never this passionate. But somehow my tongue sought Adrian's out, wrapping around his like it'd been doing this forever, and Adrian's responded. The feeling was incredible. This was why everyone went on and on about how great kissing was. This was what Julia and Kristin, even Jill and Angeline, meant when they talked about how much fun making out was.

After another minute Adrian calmed down and pulled away, but only enough so that we could both breathe. His forehead was still touching mine. He was breathing heavily and I was surprised by how smug I felt at that. I shouldn't have felt that way. I should have felt disgusted, or at least terrified by what I'd just done. Instead I just felt... satisfied. A few weeks ago I'd been completely baffled by hand holding, now I was kissing well enough to leave Adrian Ivashkov breathless.

I knew I couldn't live in this moment forever, though. I'd have to open my eyes and face the daunting truth sooner or later. I opened my eyes and found myself staring into Adrian's big green ones. His hands cupped my face once again, but he didn't look enthralled or dreamy or even plagued by spirit anymore. His eyes were clear and serious.

"You're going to say that didn't change anything, aren't you?" It was a question, but his stony tone made it seem more like a fact. "Why can't you just admit how you feel? You just had your tongue shoved down my throat, I'm not going to buy that bullshit about you not wanting me."

I pushed him away and sat up. He was right. I couldn't deny how I felt, not to him, at least. But how I felt really didn't change anything. "It was never about me not wanting you. The Alchemists won't allow it. You have to understand, it's like the ultimate sin in their eyes. I won't go against that. I can't."

"Why not?" he asked. He didn't seem angry, more curious than anything else.

"Because," I said, "I'd be turning my back on everything I've ever known. On my family. My father would disown me! I'd never see my mother again. Or my sisters. I'd have to disappear or the Alchemists would send me away." I sighed. "I like you, Adrian. But it's not that simple in my world. Liking you, being friends with Jill, Eddie and Angeline? I almost got sent away just for helping Rose prove she was innocent. What do you think they'd do if they knew that I was here with you right now?"

He was silent for a few minutes. I took that as a good sign. He was starting to understand just what was at stake here. Eventually he sat back and shook his head. "I always knew the Alchemists were strict, Sage, but that seems more like a cult than a job. I mean, they don't like Moroi or damphirs, I get that. We're unnatural, evil, whatever. But they'd remove you from Palm Springs just for being friendly?"

I smirked and wondered briefly if maybe some of Adrian's personality was rubbing off on me. "Sticking my tongue in your mouth qualifies as a little more than just friendly, I'd say."

He smiled. "Yeah. You're definitely the friendliest Alchemist I've ever met." His smile faded and turned regretful. "Sydney, I'm sorry. I don't mean to be pushy. I would never ask you to choose between me and your family. I don't want you to ever have to make a choice like that. I just don't want you to feel bullied by the Alchemists. This is your life and you should be able to make your own decisions."

"Thank you." I smiled, grateful that he cared so much, but unable to give him what he wanted. "Unfortunately, dating a vampire is not a decision I can make right now."

He looked like one of Mrs. Terwilliger's cats when they heard a can of cat food pop open. He perked up and studied my face. "Right now?"

I shook my head. "That's not what I meant. Or... I don't know, okay?" I gestured around the car, indicating our situation. "It's not like I'm having the easiest time staying away from you. But we can't kiss anymore, okay? We can't. If someone saw, if the Alchemists wanted to check up on me... I'd be sent away faster than you could blink."

"I don't know, Sage. I'm a pretty fast blinker. " He fluttered his long, dark eyelashes at me like girls did in those old black and white movies Carly used to love so much and I couldn't help but laugh. He smiled, but his tone was serious. "I don't want to do anything to get you in trouble. I just want to be on the same page. I like you, you like me, but we're star-crossed lovers who will forever be torn apart by circumstance. Got it."

I laughed. I wasn't sure why, but hearing him say it like that, like we were Romeo and Juliet, fighting our families wishes so that our love could burn bright, it just sounded so funny. It was true to an extent, we came from two different worlds and our people didn't want us to be together. Thinking about it, we were actually a lot worse off than Romeo and Juliet. They were at least both human. But I had a hard time picturing Adrian and I in a tomb somewhere committing suicide because the Alchemists and Moroi said a relationship was forbidden. It was all very melodramatic. Adrian must have agreed because he had started laughing, too.

"Sage," he started to say after we'd both calmed down, but right then my alarm went off.

I looked down at the time and felt the oddest mix of relief, annoyance and anxiety.

"It's time to do the spell," I said and got out of the car.