New chapter. In which the assignment is completed... And Marinette finds out what Lila can actually do.

Chapter 03: Truths and Lies

Marinette was glad it was meditation day, as they had taken to call the day of the week Bustier would help everyone with meditation exercises – as easy as beating Rose Bride was, she was maddening enough that she suspected Papillon was trying to get her or Chat angry enough to Akumatize. The meditation sessions, thankfully, were excellent at calming everyone.

And then, of course, as they were at her home to work on the assignment Lila had to ask exactly the wrong question: "Is it just me, or this meditation is very similar to Neigong?" How?! How did Lila know of that?! One thing was Bustier having everyone do the same "Internal Skill" meditation her mother had her do since she was a child, another was Master Fu telling her they could legitimately help unlocking her qi and get rid of the timer (they were only part of the equation, and Master Fu had taught Chat and her the rest so they could do it and teach the others), but Lila of all people knowing them?! What was she hiding?! And why is she showing her phone showing she downloaded the volume 1 of "Beware of Chicken", the famous Xianxia novel?

"I know that qi may or may not linked to Miraculous magic, I don't ask those things to Ladybug, but I got interested in it after my father showed me this novel a few years ago." Lila said. "And yes, I was too young, now I get it."

Oh. That explained it. Though Lila's dad sounded like a weirdo.

"She goes to a weird Savate gym that offers Neigong courses on the side." Sabrina explained. "The teacher there is a rather… Strange guy. Not that kind of strange, just so greedy you'd swear he's a killer for hire and with a weird sense of humor, but when it comes to martial arts he's a serious guy. He even called the police on one of his teachers when he tried to get too close to Rose, though dad was surprised by that…"

"That may be due the rather hostile past Paris' Savateurs and the police share." Lila volunteered.

"Anyway, that was why Marinette was having a weird-out. Not the magic thing, just trying to keep you away from the weirdo that made Rose so weirdly aggressive at times."

That wasn't the truth… But then again, if that place had turned Rose in a violent angel she didn't want to imagine what it would do to Lila.

"So that's why Rose wants me to try it out." Lila had to say. "We got in a discussion, Boxing versus Savate, and she wants me to come to that place and try it out."

"Just promise me you won't enroll…"

Lila had the audacity of showing Marinette her crossed fingers before promising.

Surprisingly enough for Marinette, the work proceeded without issue, and they actually managed to complete it. While Sabrina had to leave to save Alya from the consequences of choosing the wrong book while working with Chloè, the others, on Lila's suggestion, went out for ice cream at Andrè's (orange and vanilla for Lila), that day at the Champ de Mars. And just as they were finishing, a stereotypical American tourist of the wealthy type, spray tanned and vaguely familiar, came with a pair of bodyguards and asked where the city hall was so he could buy the Eiffel Tower.

"But it's not city property yet, we, the Eiffel family, have maintained ownership the entire time." Lila replied, in fluent English but affecting a heavy French accent in place of the very light Italian one she normally had.

"Yet?" the tourist asked.

And then, as Marinette, the bodyguards, and a few passerbies looked in shock, Lila proceeded to spin a sob story about how the city wanted to steal the tourist revenue and so had come up with trumped up taxes and could well seize it, and was scaring away every potential buyer. And the tourist not only bought her story, he bought the Tower and cut her a check of one million dollars as advance payment, even signing the contract Lila "casually" had. In two copies.

Then, after the tourist left with his copy of the contract, Lila turned to a passerby and asked where she could find a Red Cross donation boot for the check, and once she knew there was one the other side of the Tower she went and covertly gave them the check alongside twenty Euros of her own money and left, followed by her bewildered classmate.

"What." Marinette asked when she recovered the ability to speak.

"Nobody will ever believe you." Lila replied with a grin.

Marinette agreed, she had seen it happen and could scarcely believe it herself. Still, she had to ask: "Why did you do that?"

"To ruin his presidential campaign, of course. He's going to realize he got scammed and void the check before the Red Cross can cash it, and when it bounces they'll make a stink over it. And then, he'll have to owe up to scamming the Red Cross as a tourist or say he got scammed by a teen that for some reason donated the loot to charity, and he'll be believed to have scammed the Red Cross and tried a stupid excuse to justify himself. Either way, his image will be ruined, and he won't recover before the election."

Oh. Now Marinette recognized that annoying orange. "Wait, you think he has any chance to win?"

"Hombee is a shit politician. Good president, just look at how she managed to leave a working government where even Mays, Mays, had failed, but when it comes to talking to her constituents... Well, I'm not sure she'd have won the primaries, let alone the actual election, had her being Victory not been leaked to the press, and the novelty has worn off. They're even using it to attack her, given how many times she has blown off her presidential duties to go heroing. And that Florida Man, he can talk to people."

Marinette blinked as she realized that Lila was genuinely trying to be helpful… With the biggest lie she had ever witnessed.

"Also, I'm proving a point: lies are a tool, neither bad nor good, just dangerous." Lila continued with a smile. She was going to continue when her phone played Volpina's Mirage music, that the Italian was apparently using as her SMS notification, and after looking at it the monument salesgirl beamed and hugged Marinette, repeating "She'll be here!" in Italian again and again.

"Who are you talking about?" Marinette asked.

Noticing her position, Lila jumped back with a blush and explained: "Mom bought the Disneyland tickets for my birthday, on September 24. Well, my birthday is on the 20, but it's a school day, and with how busy she is it's been a few years since we last celebrated my birthday together."

"Oh. Wait, what about your dad?"

"He's got limited visitations, and Mom tricked him into using them early to keep him from doing a mess. Again."

At this point Marinette wanted to know. She expected some lie, but with the build up it would be entertaining.

"And no, I'm not telling who he is. Not now and hopefully not ever." Lila proclaimed. "He's always been an "interesting" guy, and got worse after the divorce, and dealing with him is worse than Chloè could ever be."

"And the only character who realizes is slavery is presented as a weirdo! She doesn't get the culture! Because there's nothing to get!" Chloè shouted in class as she presented the work she and Alya had done on the one children's book Chloè had a personal vendetta against since her father made her realize who exactly they depend on. "Do you have any idea why the staff at Le Grand Paris is the best in the country and beyond? Because they're paid what they're worth! Their starting pay is twice the minimum wage, they get everything the law says they deserve and more, and Daddy doesn't try to screw them over, so they put the proper effort and don't spit in anyone's meal! But this supposed author instead has slave labor, and the guy who wants to be paid at least a pittance is the weird one!"

As Chloè started rambling on how everyone in the world used the same eurocentric magic system and somehow nobody else had developed their own, Marinette gave a look at Lila, the only one aside for Alya to have no experience with Chloè's more righteous side. The poor Italian looked like she'd prefer an Akuma attack to that.

Notes

Neigong (Inner Skill) is a general term for various Daoist schools of meditation, breathing and exercise practices aimed at self cultivation for better health, that in the Wuxia and Xianxia genres is often a method to cultivate qi. The more famous Qigong can be classified as a subset of Neigong with a more martial focus.

In this universe, the web novel series "Beware of Chicken" is already complete and famous. And not something for a child.

During the Belle Epoque, the streets of Paris were controlled by various gangs that outnumbered and outclassed the police by far… Leading to many Parisians learning and improving the martial art of La Savate to pick up the slack, and the gangs doing the same to compete.