The conversation some of you have been waiting for! Enjoy!

Thanks again to my fab beta, CoppertopJ :)

The next few weeks sped by quickly. It was amazing to have Edward back in my life, and though it wasn't all plain sailing, we were getting on well. We spent time getting to know each other again, hanging out with the family and, well, enjoying each other.

We had spent hours talking about how we had felt without each other, hating to think about the other in pain, but needing to talk it all through so that we had no secrets between us. Edward was keeping his word and treating me like his equal, not making decisions without talking to me, like he had been prone to doing before.

The topic of my change hadn't come up again since that first day, although I thought about it often. I always chickened out of bringing it up, as I didn't want to start an argument. Although Edward had agreed to at least talk about it, I knew his stance on the matter and it wouldn't be an easy conversation. I had been thinking hard about it, knowing that it was a serious decision to make, and I had decided that it was definitely what I wanted. I had been waiting for the right time to talk about it with him, but the right time never seemed to come up. My nineteenth birthday was only a week away and I felt like I was running out of time, so I had decided that I was just going to go for it.

One sunny afternoon, Edward had taken me to the forest where he and his family went hunting, having found an area similar to our meadow back in Forks. He had brought along a picnic for me, which I had just finished and we were sitting on a blanket enjoying the warmth of the early autumn sunshine.

I sat with my back against Edward's chest, holding his hand in mine, turning it to watch the sun reflecting off his skin in a spectacular way. The sight of him in the sun would always take my breath away. Prisms of rainbows danced in front of my eyes and I wondered how he couldn't see the beauty in it, remembering that first day in our meadow.

"You're very quiet today," he whispered in my ear, "Something on your mind?"

"Yes," I said, still looking down at his hands, "But I'm a little worried to bring it up with you."

"I thought that was the case," he muttered, "I think I already know what it is, but please tell me. I don't want us to keep things from each other."

"I want...to be like you," I said, after a few moments of silence, "I've thought about it a lot and I want to be a vampire." I didn't look at him, worried about his reaction, but confident in what I wanted.

"I knew that's what it was," he sighed, breathing in my scent, "I have been dreading this conversation."

"You promised that we could talk about it," I reminded him.

"I know," he sighed, "And I suppose now is as good a time as any." He turned me round so I was sitting facing him, taking my hands in his.

"So...you don't want me to be like you?" I said tentatively, tears beginning to well up in my eyes at the thought of him not wanting me.

"Oh, love, please don't cry," he said, "It's not that I don't want you. I just don't want this life for you. You deserve so much more. You are an angel, not a monster. You deserve light and happiness. All my world will bring you is darkness and sadness."

"I don't believe that," I told him, "You are not a monster. You fight against what you really are to keep from killing humans. All of your family do. Do you really think Carlisle is a monster?"

He shook his head, looking down at our joined hands, "No one could say he is a monster, but Carlisle has never killed a human. I have killed many."

"Well, what about Esme?" I countered, "She has slipped and killed humans. Does that make her a monster?"

"They were accidents," he replied, "I hunted humans freely, by choice."

"Criminals," I said, "Humans that were out to harm or kill other humans. I am sure you saved more lives than you took."

He looked up into my eyes, seeming to search for something, "You really mean that, don't you?"

"Yes," I said, "You are not a monster. And as for happiness. That's what you bring me. I've never been happier in my life than when I'm with you."

"You don't think Carlisle and Esme are monsters," I continued, "But you think that I will automatically become a monster if you turn me?"

"No, I don't. I suppose you are right," he conceded, "But what about your soul?"

"I've never been particularly religious, so I'm not sure I even believe in souls," I told him, "However, if souls do exist, I can't believe for a second that you don't have one. Or the rest of your family, for that matter. You all love so intensely, not only your mates, but each other. You all have such a strong family bond. They are not the actions of soulless monsters." I looked deep into his eyes as I spoke, trying to convey this to him. I hated that he thought so lowly of himself. If only he could see himself as I saw him.

"That's not the only thing though," he sighed, "You have to give up so much. Your family, your friends, your future. With me, you can't have children. That's the thing that my mother and Rosalie regret most about this life."

"I am not Esme or Rosalie," I told him, "I have never wanted children. I will never want children. It's just not something that I have ever wanted and I know that I would never change my mind, even if I did stay human. I spent my whole like looking after my mother. I don't want that for my life."

"And your family and friends?" he asked.

"My mother and father have always done what suited them best in life," I told him, "I would only be doing the same thing. I'm not saying that it will be easy to leave them, but I know how hard it is to be away from you. I don't ever want to have to leave you. If I stay human, then something is going to take me away from you. A car accident, an illness, old age. And then what?"

"Then I would find some way to follow you," he muttered, so quietly I'm not sure he meant for me to hear.

"No!" I screamed, standing up. I needed to move, to try to shake the thought of him no longer existing out of my head. Edward was on his feet in an instant, pulling me into his arms.

"You can't, Edward!" I exclaimed, "If something ever were to happen to me, you can't do that. I can't stand the thought of you no longer existing. And your family, they need you."

"Shhh, I'm sorry," he said, running his hands up and down my back to try to comfort me, "But if you were gone, I wouldn't have anything else left to live for."

"That's why you need to change me," I said, tears spilling over and running down my cheeks, "We need each other and the only way to ensure that is for you to change me."

"But, Bella, you don't know what you're asking of me," he groaned, sitting back down on the blanket, pulling me onto his knee.

"Then, I'll get Alice to do it," I whispered, hating to pull that card, but knowing that I would if I had to. He gasped, pulling back to look at me.

"She already said she would," I continued, "She doesn't want to lose her brother if something happens to me. Besides, you promised that you would stop making decisions about my life. This is my decision to make, not yours, and if you won't do it, I'll find a vampire that will."

Edward huffed a sigh and ran his hands through his hair, a sign that he was frustrated, but he didn't say anything. We sat in silence for a few minutes, though it felt like hours, and I wished I were the mind reader so I could know what he was thinking. I fought with my curiosity to know what was going on his head, knowing that he needed time to think.

"No, I won't let Alice do it," he said finally. I pulled away from him, tears filling my eyes once again, annoyed that he was still trying to make decisions for me, but he held me tight.

"Let me finish," he said, and I settled down in his arms to at least hear him out, "Alice won't change you. If this is the decision you have made, then I want it to be me." His voice was barely a whisper.

"Really?" I gasped, looking up into his eyes, "You mean it?"

"Yes. You're right. You usually are," he chuckled lightly, "This is your decision alone. If this is truly what you want, if you're going to go through with it no matter what, then I want to be the one who changes you. I want it to be my venom in your veins, though I hate that you will have to go through that pain."

"Thank you, Edward," I gushed, throwing my arms around his neck, "I want it to be you, too. I want to be connected to you in that way."

"Never think that I was ever against this because I don't want you," he said, "I want you. I want you like me, indestructible, immortal. I really do. I just think you deserve better than this half life. If there was any way on this earth that I could become human for you, I would do it in a heartbeat. In truth, there's nothing I want more in the world that to have you by my side forever. It just feels like the most selfish thing I have ever wanted. But, you've convinced me that it is your decision and yours alone, so as long as you are sure, as long as you have thought it through, then I will do it."

With that, I kissed him. I'd never really believed that I would convince him to change me. He had always been so adamant before, never really even talking about it with me, just shutting the conversation down before it even started. The fact that he had listened to me and was letting me make my own decision about this, meant the world to me.

I turned my head, deepening the kiss between us, my hands resting on his neck as his roamed up and down my back. I adjusted myself so I was straddling his legs and I could feel him begin to harden beneath me. There was nothing sexier than feeling what I did to him. Before he left, he was always so careful not to let me feel that. I moaned as I moved against him, grinding against him trying for find some fiction.

I moved from his mouth to catch my breath and his lips went straight to my neck, kisses trailing down my neck to the spot just behind my ear. I flung my head back, my eyes closed, as each kiss sent tingles through my body, right to my core. I shivered when his kisses trailed from my neck, down my collar bone to the top of my breasts just visible above my top.

Slowly, I moved my hands from his neck, opening each button on his shirt, exposing his sparkling skin. I was still amazed at how beautiful he was every time I saw him. Once I had removed his shirt, I pushed him down so he was lying on his back, watching as the sun glittered off his sculpted body. I continued down his body, opening the button at the top of his trousers and pulling them down his legs.

I sat back on my knees, enjoying the view of him naked before me, before leaning over him placing open mouthed kisses along his chest as I worked my way towards his arousal.

"Bella, no," he said, sitting up slightly as he realised what I had planned, "You don't have to. It's demeaning."

"I want to," I said firmly, sitting up on my knees to look him in the eye, "Lie back, baby."

He lay back down, though I could tell that he was still conflicted. I licked my lips when I came face to face with his erection, hard and already leaking. I hadn't been lying when I said I wanted to do this, but I had never done anything like this before. Leah talked about all sorts of inappropriate things. Even when I put my fingers in my ears, she just said, "This is what girlfriends talk about, Bella." I tried to remember everything she had told me, as I tentatively licked the bead of liquid that was gathering on his tip. I moaned at the flavour of him, surprised that I actually enjoyed the taste of him. It was like the taste of kissing him, but tangier and intoxicating.

I grasped the base of his length in my hands and lowered my mouth over his tip. He groaned as I engulfed him in my mouth, the warmth of me contrasting with the iciness of him. I moved my lips down his shaft, taking as much of him in my mouth as possible, before pulling back up again. When I reached the top, I swirled my tongue over his tip, hoping to get some of his amazing taste on my tongue again. I continued in that rhythm, up and down, thinking that I must have been doing something right as he was moaning inarticulately with every movement.

"Oh, God, Bella," he moaned, "You.. should move. I'm gonna..." I knew what he was trying to tell me, but I wanted to taste more of him so I continued my ministrations and just as I lowered my head one last time, he growled and I felt his seed hit the back of my throat. I pulled off him, swallowing immediately, licking my lips at his amazing concentrated flavour.

"Wow," I whispered, staring down at him.

"Shouldn't that be my line," he chuckled, sitting up and pulling me towards him so I was straddling him again, "That was amazing. Thank you."

"That was my pleasure," I whispered, "Trust me!"

I never thought that performing oral sex on someone would have been such a turn on, but I was so wet and swollen. I needed some sort of release and I began to grind on him, moaning as I realised that he was once again hard beneath me. He kissed me hard, his tongue demanding entrance that I gladly gave. As we kissed, he picked me up and lay me down on the grass beside him.

He carefully removed my clothes, so I was laying bare before him. He kissed every inch of my skin, worshipping my body until I felt like every nerve was pulsating with need. I could feel my thighs wet with my arousal and when his hand brushed lightly against my sex, I moaned.

"Please," I begged.

With that his fingers pushed through my folds and I gasped when his fingers came into contact with my swollen nub. He pushed two fingers deep inside me, pumping them in and out, his thumb swirling around my clit.. His fingers curled, hitting some hidden spot inside me causing my body to buck involuntarily. His thumb continued circling tortuously until I was panting with the need to come. With one final curl of his fingers and swirl of his thumb, I fell off the edge of the abyss, screaming his name.

By the time my head cleared and I opened my eyes, he had settled himself between my legs, his hard length sitting just on top of my mound. I readied myself for the overwhelming feeling of having him inside me, nodding my head as he looked down at me, his eyes asking if I was ready. He lined up with my entrance, my legs hitching up around his hips and he pushed his length deep inside me in one fell swoop.

I moaned at the feeling of him stretching me, filling me as he completely surrounded me, taking over all of my senses. At that moment, there was nothing else in the world. No family, no friends, no vengeful vampires. It was just the two of us. I stared into his eyes as he loved me, the pressure building up within us both until we both exploded, each others names on our lips.

I've had a few reviews wondering whether all these lemons are going to end up leading to a hybrid baby. I'm not sure what everyone thinks of Renesmee in the original stories and, while I liked the story line way back when I first read the books, I now much prefer stories without the hybrid baby. Pregnancy and babies are somewhat of a sore subject for myself and so there won't be any of that in my stories x