Hey, guys! Thank you so much for the follows and reviews and for your constant, unfaltering support. I couldn't possibly write without you. Here's Chapter 17. I hope you like it. Heed warnings!

WARNINGS : Under- age relationships, child abuse, rape, swearing, smut, self harm, substance abuse., etc

"You know what we need?" Elena whispered to Damon. She was sitting between him and a suspiciously composed Ric on their flight back home.

"A miracle?" Damon teased.

She paused and glared at him, "A new plan."

"What are you two mumbling about?" Ric interrupted.

Elena could've handled some amount of rage on his part, but his cool detachment was damning. "Ric, we were going to tell you-"

"You couldn't have thought I wouldn't find out," He said deadpan. "And you couldn't have imagined I'd be pleased about it either. He's almost nine years older than you-"

"Eight," Damon chipped in.

"-And he has a girlfriend."

"You- what?" Elena turned to Damon.

"Woah, hey, you know that's not true!"

"You know very well what a shallow bastard he can be."

"Uh- Ouch?"

"I figured you were brighter than this," He went on. "Damon can be-"

"A real dick, right. So how am I the one who's getting lectured? Why don't you hassle him instead?"

"Thanks, really," Damon scoffed.

"Done that. Intend to. But he can do whatever the bloody hell he wants. You on the other hand, can't."

"I can so!"

"You're having some sort of a fling with an older man," He said as he flicked through a travel magazine. "Of course you can't and, oh, you're grounded."

Elena's chagrin turned to anger. "You-"

"Can we not do this here?" He cut her off. "I'd rather do it when we're at home. Alone."

"I say we do it right here, right now," Elena cast Damon a meaningful look.

"We're on a moving plane," Damon stated the obvious. "As much as I'd like to escape this incredibly awkward conversation, I can't."

"So put on the headphones," Elena glowered at him until he conceded. "Now talk," She snatched Alaric's magazine from under his nose.

He sighed. "You've had your say about my mistakes, now I'm having mine about yours. Fortunately, in view of your age and the situation, my say carries more weight."

"Why are you so convinced that this is a mistake?"

Alaric leaned towards her. "How far has this gone?"

Elena blushed. "As if I'd tell you that."

"Then tell me this. Who are you going to run to when he dumps you? And who'd bail you out if you got pregnant? Somehow, I don't think it'd be him."

"Pregnant?" She cried. "I'm not that stupid!"

Damon shot them a keep it down look and went back to staring at the screen in front of him. The woman sitting directly across from them looked up from her Scottish magazine. Understood English, apparently. If there was one thing Alaric loathed about being the single guardian of a teenage girl, it was the incorrect assumptions he so often read in people's eyes.

He lowered his voice. "You might not be that stupid, but you could get your heart broken. Messing around with someone like Damon… Honestly, you must've run into this blind."

"I did not! I've wanted this to happen for ages!"

Alaric slumped back. "So that's what happened to poor Ben. How did I miss that?"

"I made sure you did," She said sheepishly. "I was never with Ben."

"Charming."

"Why can't you just be happy for us?"

Alaric's eyes narrowed. "Listen to me, Elena. You're leaving yourself wide open. You may think that the age gap makes no difference, but I'm here to tell you that it does. He's experienced, and you're not-"

"Yet."

"That's not funny," He scowled. "I just don't want to see you get hurt."

"You were the one who told me to open up and let people in," Elena reasoned. "If I get hurt, I get hurt. I'll at least know I tried."

Alaric looked at Damon and then back at her. "How serious are you about him?"

"Pretty damn," Elena said decisively. "And so is he."

"I know," He groaned. "But I have to at least attempt to talk you out of this. It would be negligent of me not to."

"And I love you for that," She smiled. "And everything you're doing for me. It's been a hard year and you've helped me through it and I finally feel like I'm in a good place now, but Damon is a big part of it."

"I understand," Alaric agreed in a soft voice. "But you need to understand that I can't condone this, at least not for the next two years."

"What if we promise to- uh, wait?" Elena glanced at him.

Alaric looked startled. "What are you saying? You mean you never-"

Elena giggled. "Ah, that's shocked you."

"You mean Damon-"

"I wanted to, but he wouldn't let it happen."

"Wow."

"Well, can you really blame me? He's the most unbelievably sexy man I've ever-"

"Alright, I get the picture. Stop panting."

"But I don't want to be just another conquest to him either. It gives me some sort of…" Elena trailed off, unable to find the right words.

"Power," Alaric deduced. "Huh, as long as you're playing nice, I don't think I can really whine. And I know you'll be safer with him than with any of those douche bags from school. He values his life too much."

"Is that a yes?" Elena asked warily.

"You're still grounded," Alaric pointed out.

"Thank you!" She squealed in glee.

"I think he said you're grounded," Damon's amused voice came as a surprise to her.

"You were listening?"

"Of course he was," Alaric shook his head.

"Most unbelievably sexy man, huh?" Damon smirked.

"Ugh, can you tone down on the yuck- fest?" Alaric shuddered. "It's making me nauseous."

"You can have our barf bags," Damon said smugly.

Elena sunk back into her seat. This was going to take some getting used to, but she couldn't bring herself to complain. For the first time in a long time, she felt buoyant. The secret was out and she could finally breathe.

"Oh, don't be so bitter," Damon was still jeering. "Now that you're free from the she- devil-"

"What about Miss Sommers?" Elena cut him off. "I've noticed the way she looks at you."

"I haven't called her back since our first date," Alaric mused. "That is if she even wants to go out with me again."

"So call her and get married and have babies and live happily ever after!" Elena exclaimed.

Alaric laughed. "You don't ask for much."

"It should've been you getting married," Elena shrugged.

"I've had my turn," Alaric sounded beat. "It's Nik's go. Hopefully he makes a better job of it."

"It's all over now," Damon said seriously. "All this stuff that's been hanging over you since the breakup has been dealt with. Now, it's time you really move on."

Taken aback by Damon's abrupt insightfulness, Alaric automatically chose to second- guess. "I sense a ploy in there somewhere."

Damon and Elena exchanged mischievous looks.

"I was thinking more 1950s with a pinafore and frill around the collar, but it might clash with the whole thing this place's got going on," Caroline Forbes said scribbling something in her planner.

"Lose the frill," Elena was already regretting asking Caroline to help set up the bistro, but her assistance was crucial if the place wasn't to end up resembling a scene from The Shining.

"What do you have in mind?" Caroline poked her head around a heap of magazines and Elena's laptop. The counter was now doubling as her makeshift fashion and décor agency.

"Anything that doesn't involve cosplay," Elena examined the display menu one last time before ducking out to dispose of the garbage.

"Nah, I'm thinking more 90s," Caroline called out.

As Elena shut the trash can, Damon's car pulled into the curb. He got out juggling Chinese take- out in one hand and a huge bouquet of roses and dahlias, all bright red and pink, in another. She sprinted forward, offering to carry the food and instead got a lopsided smile from him.

"Here," He propped the flowers in the crook of her arm. "Doesn't do you nearly enough justice, but still."

"This is beautiful," Elena breathed in the intoxicating scent, loving the sound of cellophane crinkling.

Damon threaded his fingers through the hair above her neck and kissed her with more tenderness than she'd ever felt in her entire life.

"Why does my place look like something that came from the rear of a unicorn?" He said as they stepped inside.

"That's because most people prefer colour as opposed to the gothic- emo vibe you were trying to sell," Caroline retorted bluntly.

"Go easy on the sparkle, jailbait. We're not targeting nine year olds either."

"Stop calling me that!" Caroline said indignantly.

Damon's new found form of amusement was to drive Caroline to her limits and ever since she had blatantly suggested that Elena started dating one of Matt's buddies from the lacrosse team, he had made it his life's purpose.

Elena grabbed a spherical glass bowl from the cabinet and filled it with tap water, busying herself with the flowers.

"Here's the deal, sweetheart," Damon pulled out a hundred dollar note from his pocket and snapped it out straight. "Put everything back the way it was and I'll give you this."

"Dump that bowl of water over his head and I'll give you this," Caroline shoved a fifty dollar bill at Elena.

"Then the French maid costume goes," Elena said. "Let me wear a t- shirt and we have a deal."

"No!" Damon and Caroline protested in unison. "Absolutely not."

"Look at you two getting along," Elena picked up the last of the waste bags and headed out.

"What the-?" Caroline exclaimed, her stare trained on Elena's laptop.

"Caroline?" Damon tensed, noting the sudden change in her expression.

"Hmm?"

"Huh?"

"Huh?" Caroline said flustered. "Nothing!"

"What are you hiding?" It took him all of two bounds to get beside her.

"Stop!" Caroline's face was flushed. "It's none of your business."

Damon ignored her. Elena's wallpaper was a bunch of ravens perched upon a fence. One program was running- Firefox. He maximised it and the window exploded across the screen.

"I'm sure Ric will understand if I'm a few minutes late," Elena tried to reason as Damon sped through the darkening streets, loud bass blasting the stereo.

He hadn't said a word to her the entire ride. The angry music was the opposite of silence, but she felt even lonelier somehow. Every now and then, she snuck glances at Damon's profile, barely visible in the fleeting street lights.

Elena gave up on trying to read into Damon's mood swings and decided to acknowledge Caroline's incessant texting instead.

I'M SO SORRY. YOU FORGIVE ME, RIGHT?

Elena replied, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

WELL… I ACCIDENTALLY OPENED YOUR MAIL IN FRONT OF DAMON?

Elena let out a loud gasp, drawing Damon's attention.

He slowed the car and turned down the music. "What's going on? Who are you texting?"

She sat frozen, staring at her laptop on the dashboard. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see him move closer to her.

"Hey," He squeezed her arm. "Look at me. What is it?"

"You- you read my mail?"

A beat passed, then two, but he didn't say anything.

"Damon?"

"You still write to him," He paused. "To Aaron."

"I do," Elena swallowed. "I mean, he does. I haven't written back to him since the night I- I got that video."

Another beat passed. "Where is he?"

"I wish I knew," Elena frowned at her lap. "He's out of the system, out on his own. He moves around a lot. He was somewhere in North Carolina last time I heard from him. Scares the hell out of me, picturing him all alone on the road."

"How often do you write to him?"

"About once a week?" She looked at him as if waiting for his disapproval, but Damon said nothing. "It makes me feel better. Like I'm keeping him close. Like I'm-"

"What?"

"Like I'm keeping him alive. Like our e-mails are lifelines." Elena knew how insane she sounded. She had said too much already, so she kept quiet.

Damon waited and finally said, "Not my business, but you know, Elena… Aaron's not the only person you can talk to."

"Damon-"

"I didn't go through your mails," His gaze was on the road. "But I have a pretty good idea what they must be about. If you can't talk to me, talk to Caroline… or Ric. Anyone. A therapist if you must."

"But not to Aaron, is that what you're saying?"

"I didn't say that," Damon sighed.

"I'm okay," Elena faced away, lowering the window as they entered her street. Her hair blew all around. "It doesn't matter."

"It does," Damon pulled into the driveway. "Please, if not for you, for me."

Elena felt the overwhelming urge to throw herself at him, to bury her face in his shirt and tell him everything- about Mason, about the Detective, the flashbacks that were keeping her up at night- but she couldn't. She just sat there, making no move to get out.

"I could stay over if you want," Damon said, concerned. "Ric will throw a fit, but just say the word."

"No, you're opening in two days," Elena said without meeting his eye. "Go. I'll be fine."

"You don't always have to put on a brave front," Damon unfastened her seat belt. "It's alright to- What happened to your neck?"

"What- uh, it's," Elena's hand automatically flew to the patch of red skin on her left collar bone that she was hoping no one would notice, but Damon did. Damon always did. "My uh- curling iron. It slipped."

Damon leaned in for a closer look. "That's not a burn mark," He scowled. "They look like scratches."

"What are you, an expert on burn marks now?" Elena let out a nervous laugh. "It was an accident, Damon."

The darkness and the porch light made his face glowy and shadowy at the same time and his eyes narrowed in a way that made her chest heavy with guilt. "You promised."

"What are you talking about?" She resisted the urge to drop her act because she knew she wasn't fooling him, but she couldn't admit it. She couldn't admit that her promise to him was trivial compared to her nightmares. To Aaron.

Damon shook his head, disappointed. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Elena's heart squeezed at his caustic dismissal, but she made no sign of it. Gathering her things, she got out of the car and waved to him, but he was already pulling away, his face hard and impassive.

She made no effort to strike up a conversation with Ric and instead went to bed early. Her body was tired from all the work at the bistro and sleep claimed her almost instantly.

Elena smiled as she felt Damon's lips on her neck. She was still in bed, under her duvet. He slowly lifted her shirt making her heart flutter. She wanted him to keep going, further, further, further, but she couldn't bring herself to say anything. He figured it out anyway and slid his hand down- way down, setting her whole body on fire.

She tugged on his pants and he sighed, the breathy sound starting her awake. Heavy breathing. A trace of cologne. Darkness. It was real. It was all happening, but not with Damon.

She reached out for her night lamp, but he stopped her. Pinning her arms above her head with one strong hand, he gently fingered her with his other. Soon, he'd be gone and this would be nothing but a bad dream.

She shut her eyes and held her breath as he took her over to the precipice and then, she came crashing down.

Damon, Damon, Damon! It was Damon. The strength of her belief would make it real.

She was a shaking mess when his weight finally crushed her into the mattress. Her tears streamed down her face, dissolving into her hair.

"Do you love me?"

She shivered at the strange, yet familiar voice. She hated him for asking her that, but she nodded silently. In spite of everything, it was the truth.

"Elena?" Alaric opened her door a crack, hesitant to wake her.

She peeked at him from under her blanket, her eyes red from sleeplessness. "I'm awake."

Alaric turned on the light, making her squint. "There's someone here to see you."

Elena looked at him questioningly.

"Detective Parker," He explained. "He helped you in Glasgow?"

She darted out of bed. "What the hell's he doing here?" She threw on a hoodie over her tank in a second.

"He says he has something important to discuss with you," He sounded anxious. "But I could get rid of him. You don't have to-"

"I want to." Elena knew she did. The Detective had some serious explaining to do.

"Elena Gilbert," Detective Parker greeted her on her way down. "I'm sorry to disturb you so early in the day."

"Hello," She returned, holding back the hostility in her voice.

"What's this about?" Alaric asked impatiently.

"I'd just like to talk to her, Mr Saltzman. Alone if you would."

"No chance of that," Alaric stood with his arms folded. "Anything you want to say to her, you can say in front of me."

Elena glanced at him. "Why don't we sit down?"

They moved to the living room. "Do you need a minute, Elena? You don't look so good."

She ran her fingers through her uncombed hair, wondering what the hell he was getting at. She knew she couldn't ask him anything with Ric breathing down her neck.

"Ric, could you make me some coffee?" She gave him a weary look. "I have an awful head ache."

Alaric studied her with raised brows, curious. "Sure, excuse me."

As soon as he was out of ear shot, Elena decided to assault the Detective with the questions she had been struggling with for the past couple of days. "What the hell did your sister do to me?"

Detective Parker seemed to be examining the place. "Nice little home you've got here. Are you happy here, Elena?"

She frowned, unable to comprehend why he was making small talk. "Okay, cut the crap, Kai. Why are you here?"

"Cream or Black?" Alaric's voice came from the kitchen.

"Black, please," Detective Parker called. "And no sugar."

Elena blew out an exasperated sigh and grabbed him by his sleeve. "Come on. Out."

"I doubt your guardian would take this very well," He said, but followed her out the door without much protest. "Beautiful day for a stroll, huh?"

Elena disagreed. The sky was overcast and the air was icy cold. "I'm seeing things that never happened," She hissed. "You have to help me."

"Nah, that's not possible," He said coolly. "If you're seeing something, it must have happened. Anyway, I'm not here for a jaunt," He continued. "I'm here to talk about Aaron Whitmore."

Elena's heart skipped a beat, but she kept walking with her head down and hands tucked in her hoodie.

"I take it you know him from one of your former homes?"

"What about him?" She snapped.

"When's the last time you saw him?" He asked.

Elena's stomach dropped. A draft of cold wind blew her way, making her shiver.

"Elena?"

"I- I don't remember," She answered.

"You don't know?"

"I don't remember," She repeated. "I don't-"

"Did you know he was here in Mystic Falls?"

Oh god. She shook her head vigorously. The mere thought of Aaron being so close to her made her heart heavy with guilt. She was panting so hard, she thought she was going to pass out when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

Elena spun around, disconcerted and found herself facing Damon. He was in a hooded leather jacket, his face barely showing. Despite the hood, she could make out thin veins along his jaw and red rims under his eyes. He looked like he hadn't gotten much rest either.

"Damon, what are you doing here? How did you-"

"I came by the house and Ric told me you had taken off with Detective Parker," He nodded at him. "Nice seeing you here."

"Same," Detective Parker nodded, but Elena could see he was miffed for having been caught off- guard.

"So, what's going on?" Damon looked between the two of them.

"We're talking about Elena's friend, Aaron Whitmore," Detective Parker clarified. "Do you happen to know him?"

Elena looked at Damon imploringly, hoping he wouldn't say anything.

"You wouldn't be asking the question if you didn't already know the answer," Damon said knowingly.

Elena's eyes shot to him. What was that supposed to mean? "Where's this going?" She disrupted the disquieting silence that followed Damon's cryptic statement. "Is there a point to these questions?"

Detective Parker turned his probing stare on her. "Can you tell me where you were yesterday, Elena?"

"Where I was?" She asked confused. "Why?"

"Don't answer that," Damon ordered. "This conversation isn't going any further until we know what this is about."

Detective Parker nodded like he had expected the interruption. "Aaron Whitmore was found dead last night."

Elena stepped back, colliding into Damon's chest. A creeping fear gripped her heart as every nerve ending tightened with terror. Her breathing accelerated ten- fold, shock coursing through her body like acid.

The Detective started saying something, but Damon cut him off. "We're done here. If you have any questions, you can make an appointment for Elena to come in with counsel."

How she got to the couch after was a complete blur. She knew she was in Damon's arms. She hung on to him, limp and catatonic as he carried her home.

"Grab the blankets, will you?" She heard Alaric fuss over her. "Aspirin is in the right cabinet. Jesus, that was completely out of line. I'm calling Liz."

"He breached a dozen laws questioning a minor like that," Damon's voice came from the stairs.

"Aaron's- he's- Aaron's dead-" Elena's voice came out as a sob. "Ric-"

"I'm right here, Elena. It's alright. You're fine."

"He's dead-"

"Damon!" Alaric yelled.

There was a shifting under her, followed by the warmth of her blanket and the scent of Damon's jacket. "I got her, I got her."

"Why did you take off with him?" Alaric was frantic. "I should've been with you!"

"I should be with you, don't you know that?"

"Elena? You're hyperventilating," Damon held a paper bag to her face. "Breathe into this."

"We belong together, you and I."

"Her pulse is well over two hundred, Damon!" Alaric was gripping her hand tightly. "We're taking her to the hospital! Now!"

"Do you love me?"

"Calm down, you'll make her worse," Damon said, cradling her. "Elena, listen to me. You need to breathe into the bag. You're sucking in too much oxygen. Breathe into the bag, that's it. There you go. Try to slow your breathing down. It's just a panic attack. You're going to be fine."

Elena watched the bag bloat and shrink in front of her. Bloat and shrink, bloat and shrink, the crumpling sound of paper strangely comforting her.

"It's alright," Alaric got on his knees. "But you'll have to be very careful with the police, Elena. Next time he gets anywhere near you, you tell me. We'll get a lawyer."

"Why?" Damon said irritated. "She didn't do anything wrong."

A horrible sound escaped Elena's throat. She couldn't even begin to picture Aaron's lifeless body sprawled across some back woods alleyway. She just couldn't. She stifled a painful scream by biting into her lip.

"Baby, no," Damon urged her gently off the couch and onto the floor where he could rock her gently. "Shh. It's okay. It's not your fault. It's not your fault."

She curled into his lap, sobbing, realizing it truly was her fault. Aaron had lost his childhood, his happiness, his everything for her and now, she'd lost him to Mason. The amount of self- loathing she felt at that moment couldn't be weighed against anything else. How could she live with herself? How could she?

Alaric's hand stroked over her hair, "You're safe," He hushed her, his voice shaking. "You're safe. We won't let anything happen to you."

Eventually Elena had no more tears left in her. She was hollow and with that came new clarity. She couldn't change what had happened, but she could at least make sure no one else she loved suffered. She sat up and wiped at her eyes, snot dripping from her nose.

For some reason she found that hilarious. She tried to hold it in, but a snort broke free.

"Elena Gilbert!" Alaric looked mildly mystified.

She thought his face was funny too. She laughed some more and once she started, she couldn't stop. Damon joined in and they laughed until their sides hurt.

"Oh, stop it!" Alaric shoved at both of them. "It's not that funny."

She laughed until she was not able to and then broke for air.

"Elena, really!" But Alaric was starting to smile despite the fear in his eyes.

She took a heavy breath and blew it out. "We need to give him a proper burial."

Damon exchanged an uncertain look with Alaric. "Elena, I don't think they'll let us-"

"I'll see what we can do," Alaric gave her a tight smile and got to his feet. "You should rest. You hardly got any sleep last night."

Elena lugged herself to her bathroom and locked herself in. She jumped at her reflection in the mirror. Her messy hair, red eyes and tear- streaked cheeks made her look alien. She couldn't recognize the person blinking back at her.

Stripping out of her hoodie and sweat shirt, she could see the fresh cuts by her collar bone. They were barely scratches, but were visible nonetheless. Disgusting. She was a disgusting girl who had no respect for her own skin. A girl who lied to everyone she cared about. Hurt, betrayed, let them down.

Mason was coming for her, but why let her know first? Why make her anticipate? Perhaps that's exactly what he wanted. For her to live in fear of her impending death, helpless and vulnerable.

She made a fist and rammed it into her cheek, fresh tears pooling her eyes. Unable to look at herself for another second, she flipped the light switch and slumped down. Feeling around for a lose tile, she found it and dislodged it enough to retrieve the untouched satchel of pills she had hidden in there months ago.

Detective Parker found himself in the most exclusive nightclub in Mystic Falls, but flashing his badge got him immediate access. He wondered briefly if the place was appropriate for a formal meeting as an attendant ushered him to a corner booth, away from the packed bar. In between checking his watch every few seconds, he took in his surroundings. The lighting was muted and the furnishings were dark. The dance floor was overcrowded and so was the bar which made sense given they were in the middle of holiday season.

"I'm waiting for someone," He said when a young woman came to take his order and as if on cue, a tall leggy blonde approached him.

She looked very attractive in lose velvet pants and a champagne hued silk blouse. He stood as soon as he met her eye.

"Ms Pierce, thank you for seeing me."

"Detective Parker," Her voice was sharp, but her smile was polite.

"Sorry about the rush, like I said it's an emergency," He gestured for her to sit.

"Ah, I'm in town to see a friend," She waved a hand at the waitress. "I'd suggest champagne. The crystal here is delicious."

"I'll have a beer," Detective Parker said in a no- nonsense manner, getting rid of the waitress who looked like she was about to start reciting the whole menu.

"So, what can I do for you?"

"You interned as a child psychologist in New York a couple years ago, or so say my sources," He looked at her for confirmation and continued when she nodded. "I take it you're at liberty to discuss old patients then?"

"Old patients, yes," She dragged, her eyes a little wide "I'm sorry, could you be more specific?"

"An Elena Gilbert," He said, his voice just audible enough to reach her. "Ring a bell?"

She nodded, gazing down at the table. "I remember her. I supervised a few sessions."

"More than a few according to my intel," He smiled.

"I guess," She answered cautiously. "Why? Is she in trouble?"

Shrewd and manipulative, Detective Parker deduced. "That's what we're trying to prevent from happening. Would you mind telling me about the nature of your sessions with Ms Gilbert?"

"I'm not sure I can," She looked uncertain. "Ms Gilbert's file was sealed soon after she was adopted. Even if I could discuss our sessions, disclosure of her condition is simply not an option and there's also-"

"That seal was broken last night," Detective cut her off. "We know everything there is to know, so it's all a matter of public record really."

She fiddled nervously with a few strands of her hair. "So why am I here?"

"To make your version of the truth plausible," He smirked when their drinks arrived. "Make it good."

Ah, so... Intense? Thrilling? Confusing? Let me know your theories and suggestions as always. PM me if you want to talk about anything at all. Thank you again, guys, without your motivation this story would probably be lost in the drafts. Love you all. Cheers! XD