Chapter 6

Obi-Wan swore that this was the absolute last kiss. Of course, he had thought that after the first one. And the second. And the third. And then he'd lost count entirely and just surrendered to the sensation reveling in the feel of her lips against his. He just couldn't seem to stop himself! At first the kiss had been soft and sweet, but it quickly deepened into something much more passionate. Electricity crackled between them and the training bond they had formed sang with pleasure. They finally broke apart to catch their breath.

"Oh, Ben." Luna sighed. Her eyes were slightly unfocused. Somehow she had ended up in his lap, her arms around his neck. Her head dropped to his shoulder. "I've never felt anything like that. How did you…?" She seemed at a loss for words. He had rendered her speechless! Him! His heart swelled enormously along with another part of his anatomy.

"I'm not sure. It must be the connection we share." The kisses had been unlike anything he had ever experienced either. He could feel her pleasure reflecting back at him while feeling his own at the same time. It was intense to say the least.

Later that night, he laid awake processing what had happened. Technically kissing wasn't an attachment, but he knew in his heart this was far more than just a kiss. He knew he should feel guilty, but he didn't. How odd!

He was suddenly reminded of something Qui-Gon had said. "Search your feelings. You will know in your heart what is right." This definitely felt right. Nothing had ever felt so right in his entire life. However, he didn't want to rush into something and risk hurting sweet, beautiful Luna. Then the second part of his Master's instructions came back to him, "Remember, the Jedi order with all its rules and regulations is gone for a reason. You must find a way to avoid the mistakes that were made by those who came before." Could it be that the rule about attachments was one of those mistakes? He had better decide where he stood on the issue before things went any further.

The next morning he was making breakfast when he felt Luna's arms slide around his waist. She looked at the scrambled eggs he was cooking then stretched onto her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. "Good Morning" she purred into his ear her voice rough with sleep. It sent shivers down his spine. He put his arm around her and affectionately pulled her closer. Then he noticed she was wearing his tunic.

"Good Morning." He raked his eyes over her body. What she was doing to that tunic was sinful. How had this happened? It seemed like only yesterday he was living the life of a hermit without a friend on the planet and now there was a beautiful woman in his hut coming on to him while wearing his tunic and not much else.

"I wondered where that had disappeared to." He smiled and wiggled his eyebrows at her.

"Oh,I'm sorry! Do you want it back?" She reached for the top button, her eyes meeting his with feigned innocence. This was getting out of hand fast! He had to do something!

"No, you keep it. It looks far better on you anyway." He turned back to the stove suddenly remembering the eggs. "Luna, I need to talk to you about something."

"Yes?"

"It's about yesterday. I…There are some things about myself that I haven't told you." He shook his head. "It's rather hard to explain." He could tell he was making a mess of this whole conversation.

What things?" Her eyebrows drew together.

He had to say something to reassure her. "What I mean to say is, my life before we met was quite a lot different than it is now. I have a few things I need to work out before we do anything else like yesterday again."

"Do you wish we hadn't…" She stopped, looking at the floor.

"No, of course not! Luna, I will never forget that kiss if I live to be 100. I just want to make sure I have things clear in my head before we go any further. I couldn't bear it if I hurt you."

She pondered this for a few moments. "Well, we certainly have plenty of time. If you need to figure things out then you should do that." Then her eyes met his. "But whatever it is Ben, I hope you know I want to help you. I can feel how sad you are sometimes. I don't know what happened, but whatever it is you deserve to be happy. Even if we don't…well, you know…again."

…

Luna paced back and forth in front of the hut. After their conversation she had tried unsuccessfully to meditate while Ben had gone for a hike.

Over and over his words repeated. "There are some things about myself that I haven't told you." What things? While she'd already guessed he was hiding something, she couldn't help but wonder exactly what he was talking about.

There were thousands of possibilities. Maybe he was on the run because of his Force sensitivity. That seemed to make the most sense, although he was so powerful he could probably have hidden his abilities easily enough. Maybe he was a criminal. No, that couldn't be it. She couldn't imagine him stealing or doing anything else illegal.

She thought back on yesterday and the incredible kisses they had shared. Pleasure coursed through her body at the memory. Last night when they parted she was sure he wanted her. She could feel it! But this morning he had reconsidered. Why? Was he somehow unavailable? Could there be someone else? This brought her up short. Could he be married? She didn't think so, but she had been wrong before.

Back on Corellia Luna had gone out with several men, but only a few had ever developed into anything serious. A dark haired sophisticated lawyer named Mason had been the last. He was devilishly handsome, charming, and much older. He had come along at a time when she was particularly vulnerable. Both her parents had died about a year before they met and she was still reeling from the loss. She was lonely and sad and he had known just what to do to help her forget. Looking back over that relationship she should have seen the signs. He never invited her to his home, he frequently cancelled plans at the last minute, and he always seemed to have one eye on his com link.

They had an intensely passionate affair for a while spending weekends in the country and meeting for dinner in secluded little cafes. She was on top of the world! Then one day, he canceled their plans because of an emergency at the office. Left on her own, she decided to visit the Zoo to start planning a field trip she wanted to take with her class. It was a beautiful day. The zoo was full of families and children and as she watched them she found herself imagining what it would be like to have a family. She loved children. What kind of a father would Mason be?

Just then she noticed a group by the Rancor enclosure. The man had a little boy on his shoulders. Next to him was a blond woman holding a little girl by the hand. The Rancor was asleep. Apparently this wasn't exciting enough for the boy.

"This is boring! I thought he'd be eating somebody."

The man replied, "They can't feed him all the time."

"Why not?" said the boy.

"Well," the man said thoughtfully, "He'd get fat. Who ever heard of a fat Rancor?" The boy giggled.

Something about the man's voice was very familiar. Could it be? No. He was working. But then they had turned around and it was Mason. Their eyes met across the viewing area and an understanding passed between them. He looked away. Just then the blond woman, who hadn't noticed their exchange spoke up.

"Come on honey, Uma's getting tired. We should be heading back."

"Right."

Off they went towards the parking lot leaving Luna too stunned to move. She sat on a bench beside the Rancor for over an hour until finally she found her way home and quietly went to pieces in her apartment. The next day he had called, apologizing profusely and told her he was leaving his wife. Luna hung up on him and they never spoke again.

That had happened two years ago. Ever since then, she had been paranoid about the men she dated. She tried not to be suspicious, but it was always in the back of her mind. Suddenly she had to know. If there was someone else Ben was involved with it was better to find out now. Surely he could answer that much. Decision made, she started off across the sand in the direction Ben had taken

….

Everything seemed to be fine at the Lars farm. Obi-Wan hadn't been going to check on them as frequently now that Luna had arrived, but everything was peaceful and quiet at the moment. Luke and Beru were outside playing. She sat crosslegged in the sand with the the boy in her lap, his white blond hair shining in the sun. He babbled earnestly and clapped his chubby hands together as if telling her something very important. A few moments later she pulled a toy starship from behind her back. He shrieked with delight, a huge smile lighting up his adorable face as he reached for it with both arms outstretched. He was Anakin's son alright.

Luke was remarkable. His Force signature shone brightly around him like a halo of purity and innocence. Love radiated from him like the rays of the sun. He was going to be incredibly powerful one day. And yet, if Anakin had followed the Jedi teachings and never gotten involved with Padme, this beautiful child would never have been born.

All of a sudden a thought of occurred to him. Suppose Luke and Leia had never bee born. What if Anakin hadn't married Padme and had followed the Jedi code to the letter? Would he still have been vulnerable to Sidious's evil seduction? Obi-Wan had never considered this. Looking back, it was hard to tell.

Anakin was a complex person. He was smart and kind, funny and charming, and loyal to a fault. He was also proud and arrogant, headstrong and stubborn, and prone to fits of anger. He had an explosive temper. Even if he had never met Padme, these were serious character flaws that could just as easily have been exploited. Maybe it wasn't the attachments, he thought.

The next logical question then was if attachments didn't cause someone to fall, could they have prevented it? Padme had told him a few things that surprised him on their way to Polis Massa. He had been unaware of Anakin's nightmares and visions about her dying. It seemed that this had been the catalyst that had sent him in search of a way to save her. If they had been able to live openly as husband and wife, perhaps Anakin would have confined in him and they could have found a solution together.

Also, if Anakin and Padme hadn't been forced to hide their relationship, they would have spent much more time together which would have left much less time available for Palpatine to influence them. It was becoming very clear to him that Jedi's views on personal attachments were something they had gotten wrong.

Obi-Wan wrapped his binoculars in a piece of cloth and put them in his bag. Just as he stood to leave, he felt Luna approaching. She was upset.

"Ben? What's going on? Who are they and why are you spying on them?"