Disclaimer: Star Wars Belongs (unfortunately) to Lucas Arts.
Author's notes: Mmm... Yeah, blame Fosfor, MageOhki and Skelethin for this.
-o-o-o-
"Look, isn't there anything you can do?" The pair of human men were seated alone, almost completely ignored by the rest of the cantina's inhabitants as one pleaded with the other. "I mean, come on, they haven't been this bad since..."
"Last week?" The second countered with a roll of his eyes and a slight smirk across his lips before he took a sip from his drink and his face wrinkled in distaste. "Really, it's your own fault for letting it get this bad."
"Well, excuse me, I didn't really have much of a choice in the matter with the bonds and what not." The first man countered with a grumble as he took a drink of his own.
"You're the one that made them, remember?"
"I didn't mean to though!"
"Well, that's hardly an excuse." The man paused a moment, before glaring back at the second. "And, it's YOUR fault that I ended up in the situation I'm in."
"Well, how was I to know they'd bond to you? Hell, you were already bonded to your wife!"
"Yes, and need I remind you, that wasn't anything I did." The first responded with a sour twist of his lips before shaking his head. "I still can't believe I let that damned twi'lek convince me to do the bloody bond after her Wookiee decided he had to stay with his people."
"Well, could be worse." The second man answered back with a slight twitch to his face. "Only one of us could have been stuck with that damned Mandalorian."
"Might I remind you, you ARE stuck with a damned Mandalorian I'm not."
"The male one." The correction was quick with a shudder as it left his lips, before his eyes blinked slightly as he caught sight of an unusual sight. "Wait, is that a...?"
Turning his head, the first man glanced over his shoulder and just stared at the sight before him. An old Jedi, dressed in the traditional robes, light saber in hand standing over a rather armless alien of a species he didn't really bother to note. "Well, that explains why there are so few of them left. If they're that bloody..."
"He's coming this way... Huh, interesting." The second man sipped at his drink again before glancing at his friend as he noted the Jedi moving to sit in the table next to theirs. "You know, we really shouldn't."
"The girls will kill us." The first man quickly agreed with a sage nod of his head as he took another tip and grimaced more than slightly.
"Slowly, and painfully."
"In inventive and creative ways."
"And yet, we're still going to do it, aren't we."
"Well, depends..."
"On?"
"Have you been as bored as I have?"
"Well, to a new bit of fun then." The second man raised his glass before taking a slug as he listened in.
"Han Solo, I'm the captain of the Millennium Falcon." The man already at the table stated before he gave a calm nod towards the Wookiee at his left. "Chewie here tells me you're looking for passage to the Alderaan system."
"Yes, indeed, if it's a fast ship." The old Jedi agreed with a careful wariness in his eyes.
"If it's a fast ship?!" There was an incredulity in the man's eyes before he leaned forward and offered them both a smirk. "You've never heard of the Millennium Falcon?!"
"Should I have?" There was a skeptical undertone to the old man's response as he studied the rogue in front of them.
"It's the ship that made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs." There was a pause as the man offered another curling smirk as he leaned forward on the table. "I've out run Imperial star ships. Not the local bulk cruisers mind ya, I'm talking about the big Correlian ships now... She's fast enough for you, old man... What's the cargo?"
"Only passengers, myself, the boy, two droids... And no questions asked." The last was said with a kind of emphasis as the Jedi's eyes hardened.
"What is it, some kind of local trouble?" There was another, knowing smirk on the man's lips as the Jedi could practically see the mental tally working behind his eyes.
"Let's just say we'd like to avoid any Imperial entanglements." It was a vague, simple answer, but the predatory way Han's eyes lit up said it all.
"Well, that's the real trick, isn't it? And it's going to cost you something extra.... 10,000 All in advance." That smug finality in Han's voice immediately made the young boy with the Jedi bristle.
"10,000? We could almost buy our own ship for that!" The anger flashing in his eyes the boy turned his head and looked imploringly to the Jedi.
"But who's gonna fly it kid, you?" The snide smirk on the man's face made the boy tense even further.
"You bet I could, I'm not such a bad pilot myself. We don't have to listen to this..." The boy stood as if to leave, before the Jedi's hand touched on his arm.
"We can pay you 2,000 now, plus 15 when we reach Alderaan." The Jedi cut in with a simple finality.
"...17 huh?" The man looked impressed for a moment, before finally nodding his head. "Ok, you guys got yourselves a ship. We'll leave as soon as you're ready: Docking bay 94."
"94." The Jedi repeated back with a nod of his head.
"Looks like somebody's beginning to take an interest in your handy work." Han spoke up suddenly before where a group of storm troopers were talking to the bartender.
Nodding without a word, the Jedi took hold of the young man's shoulder and quickly melted into the crowd. A moment later, after the storm trooper patrol had walked past, Han was just about to give instructions to Chewie before two men slid down into the stable the Jedi and the boy had just vacated. Giving them an apologetic look the man quickly spoke up.
"Sorry guys, I already have..."
"We know." The first man quickly cut him off, a grin on his face. "To Alderaan, right?"
"You see, we find ourselves in a bit of trouble..." The second picked up.
"We?" The first countered with a mild glare at his friend. "I don't recall being the one with two women fighting over him."
"But you're not going to leave me to them, are you, old buddy, old pal?" The second one looked imploringly towards the first.
"Fine." The man grudgingly agreed before looking back towards Han. "Look, my friend's in trouble two women, both rather... aggressive, to say the least and both interested in having him as all theirs." He took a moment, letting his friend wince and nod in agreement before continuing. "Which leaves us wanting to take a quick trip for a bit of a time."
"Which then, in turn leads us to you." The second one agreed with a nod of his head. "Since you're already heading out, in a quick and avoiding the authorities type fashion..."
"We were wondering if we might be able to purchase passage on the ship as well." The first man quickly supplied with a nod of his own.
"Look, guys, I appreciate the situation, I really do..." Han spoke up as he started to gesture heplessly.
"We'll pay you 1,000 credits apiece now, and another 4,000 a piece when we get to Alderaan." The first man supplied smoothly.
"...So I'd be more than happy to help you out." Han finished with a flash behind his eyes and an eager smile on his face.
"Delightful." The second man nodded before pulling out cred stick and twirling it around his fingers. "Our down payment then and we'll meet you at... what was it again?"
"Docking Bay 94." The first man noted agreeably with a smile of his own. "Just have to get a few supplies first, you know how it is."
"Of course." Hand agreed with a nod, as he quickly took the stick with a broad, growing grin on his lips, before he watched the pair walk away and he grinned over at his Wookiee companion. "Well, what do you know, Chewie, I think things are finally looking up."
Once they were a safe distance away, second man grinned over at the first. "That rogue has NO idea what he's getting himself into, does he?"
"The Force works in mysterious ways...." The first answered vaguely before his lips twitched just a bit. "Oh, how I hated it when they used to tell us that."
"I know, always felt like a cop out to me too." The second agreed as they vanished to collect their gear.
-o-o-o-
"Who would are they?" There was a note of careful caution in the Jedi's voice as he noticed the two individuals walking up the Falcon's ramp. "And why are they boarding the ship."
"Well, you see Messers..." Han paused a moment, before glancing towards the two gentlemen. "What were your names again?"
"You can call me... Carth." The first man from the cantina answered after a moment's thought, before breaking into an amused smirk. "Carth Onasi."
Rolling his eyes a bit, the second man smirked back at his companion, 'Carth.' "Just call me Atton Rand."
The first man paused a moment, before smirking in amusement back at his friend in an apparent private joke before Han spoke up. "Yeah, but we are in a bit of a hurry, so, if you don't mind?"
"Ah, but of course, of course." 'Carth' agreed with a nod as he bowed slightly and gestured towards the ramp, where Atton promptly walked up with an amused chuckle.
"I... see... I had thought..." The Jedi spoke up carefully before frowning as he suddenly clicked his mouth shut as his eyes glanced towards the dock entrance. "No, I suppose you're right, we are in a bit of a hurry."
And with that the Jedi led the boy and the two droids inside past 'Carth' who chuckled a bit and then smirked towards Han, then looked past him and a slight frown appeared. "Um, I don't mean to be alarmed but... I do believe we've got incoming."
Han started as he saw a group of storm troopers suddenly file into the dock, weapons trained on them. "Oh... Chewie! Get us ready to get out of here!"
As Han immediately unholstered his pistol and began to fire back at the group, he blinked slightly as he almost missed the hand sized sphere being tossed into the Imperial squad before suddenly a sonic explosion knocked the squad into a disoriented mess. Turning his head, the captain stared incredulously at where Carth stood with his best expression of innocence. "Hmm.. Oops. Now, I wonder how that grenade got there."
"Riiiiiiight." Han drawled before nodding his head. "How about we get out of here now before their friends show up?"
"Wonderful idea that." Carth agreed with a nod and a cheerful smile on his lips as he quickly ran up the ramp, followed by Han.
As Carth strolled into the ship's hold with a cheerful whistle on his lips, Atton raised a brow casually back at his friend. "You went and had fun without me, didn't you."
"Well, need I remind you, this whole thing is for your benefit." Carth chided lightly with an innocent smile on his face. "Besides, do you know how long it's been since I got to throw a grenade at people?"
"Yes, I was there." Atton agreed and sighed slightly at the odd looks the pair were getting. "You'll have to forgive my friend. He's spent entirely too much time around Mandalorians."
"Do recall, technically we're BOTH Mandalorians." Carth cut in with amusement as his eyes twinkled a bit. "Though, for entirely different reasons."
"Hence, why I don't drag around that pesky armor like you do." Atton supplied with a nod of his head.
"You know, I think I'm going to, ya know go see what that space pirate of a captain is up to." Luke spoke up quickly before vanishing towards the front cabin.
"The pair of you are certainly… interesting." The old man allowed before he turned and began to follow Luke.
"Coming from the Jedi who doesn't know how to hide himself, I'll take that as a compliment." Carth noted dryly, a smirk curling over his lips as he watched the man stiffen slightly in response before looking back at the pair warily.
"A Jedi? What makes you think…?"
"What, you mean besides the Jedi robes, light saber and that ever so annoying kind, benevolent wise man act?" Atton answered with a sarcastic drawl and a roll of his eyes."Gee, I don't know."
"You'll have to forgive Atton. He has… issues with Jedi." Carth spoke up with no small amount of amusement in his eyes.
"And you don't?" Atton countered as his arms crossed about his chest.
"Do remember who I married." Carth shot back with a chuckle before grinning back at the utterly confused old man. "So, got a name, or do we just call you the senile Jedi?"
"I vote the senile Jedi." Atton spoke up quickly, before grinning at the series of chirps that came up from the astromech droid that had been almost unnoticed.
"Really R2! There's no need to be rude! I'm sure that Master Kenobi is hardly senile!" The shining, gold protocol droid spoke up, scolding its smaller companion.
"Hmm… Protocol droid?" Carth paused a moment, before frowning just a bit. "Dammit, I knew we forgot something!"
"Well, we have a protocol droid here, so there isn't any need for us to bring our own." Atton countered with a slight grin on his face.
"Hmph." Carth almost seemed to pout slightly at that. "I still say we could use him."
"Well, I'm sure the girls will bring him and T3 when they show up. Then you'll have to deal with his whining about being left out." Atton paused a moment before shaking his head. "Really, why you haven't just put him in a museum yet…"
"Because, he can still run circles around most every droid out there currently?" Carth shot back.
"Only because you and your crazy twi'lek keep tweaking and upgrading him." Atton muttered slightly before shaking his head slowly. "And, seriously… How many galactic treaties does he break?"
"I'm sure there's one or two he doesn't completely and utterly violate with glee." Carth answered back cheerfully with a happy nod of his head.
"I think… I will join Luke, checking up on our captain." The Jedi Kenobi answered as he slowly backed up and carefully made his way towards the cabin himself.
"Was it something we said?" Carth asked almost innocently before looking at the protocol with a gleam in his eyes. "Saaaaaaay… When was the last time you were upgraded?"
"Oh, dear." It might've been a trick of the light, but the golden sheen of the droid's chassis seemed to pale slightly as the astromech droid at its side let off a frightened trill.
"Don't worry, you're droids! You won't feel a thing!" Carth offered with that growing grin on his lips as his hands rubbed together, before suddenly the ship began to shake in a violent, familiar shaking rippled through the ship.
"Heh, lucky droids, saved by the turbo laser fire." Atton noted as he lightly closed his eyes for an instant before smirking. "Besides… You don't even their specs for upgrading."
"Hence why I would have to properly dismantle them first." Carth agreed with a quick and eager nod of his head.
"… Bad Carth, bad." Atton shook his head and sighed slightly. "Really, think of how jealous he'll be. I imagine he might go so far as to completely scrap our shiny friend here."
"And I'd be happy to put him back together again." Carth agreed a bit too quickly with an eager gleam to his eyes.
"I really have to protest this! I quite like my components where they are!"
"Humph, coward." Carth grumbled sulkily.
The sad, affirming beeps from astromech droid caused the protocol droid to turn and glare lightly at the robot. "R2D2! How can you just take that… that menace's side?" A series of beeps and chimes sounded. "Well I don't care how accurate he is! You don't just…"
The rumbling finally stopped and the sudden smooth shift let them all know that they'd suddenly entered hyperspace.
"Well, now that THAT bit of excitement's passed…" Atton spoke up before suddenly grabbing Carth's shoulder. "Why don't we go and do some maintenance on our equipment?"
"But…" Carth immediately protest, before pausing and frowning. "Fine… But I'm working out here. I wanna be able to bug the Jedi."
"Must you do this?" Atton sighed slightly as he glanced at his friend. "Really… I mean…"
"You say it like you don't love it yourself."
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Atton insisted.
"Right, suuuuure." Carth smirked back at his friend and rolled his eyes slightly. "I mean, really, we always bring those advanced training remotes with us. You know, the ones I made to be extra difficult for Jedi to deal with."
"Of course we do." Atton insisted with a quick nod of his head. "We don't want to get rusty after all."
"Right." Carth agreed with a knowing smirk on his lips. "Rusty."
-o-o-o-
"You know, it's really not a good idea to beat a Wookiee in chess." Han noted with a slight little smirk on his lips as he saw Carth calmly decimating his partner in chess.
"Really now? And why would that be?" Carth asked half curiously as he moved a piece into place. "Check."
The angry growl that left Chewbacca's mouth made Han's smirk grow a bit more smug. "It tends to upset them."
"Well, losing tends to upset a lot of people." Carth agreed with a shrug of his shoulders.
"Yes, well most people don't pull other people's arms out of their sockets when they lose… Wookiees are known to do that." Han drawled out with a smirk.
"Please, Wookiees are hardly THAT temperamental." Carth snorted slightly as he watched Chewie move, before moving his own piece without even a moment's consideration. "And mate. Really, you should save the jokes for the wide eyed farm boy. He'll actually believe you."
Chewie seemed to half pout before he let out a rumbling sound as he crossed his arms about his chest.
"Oh, don't give me that look. It's hardly MY fault I've actually been friends with Wookiees before." Carth rolled his eyes and smirk a bit. "And yes, I do know Shryriiwook, as well as Thykaran and even Xaczik."
"Wait, Xaczik?" Han blinked slightly before looking in confusion towards a wide eyed Chewie.
"Coastal dialect." Carth waved his hand negligently "Picked it up when I was on Kashyyk a while back. So, another game?"
"I really wouldn't recommend it." Atton spoke up with a bemused smirk as he casually looked up from the adjustments he was making to a blaster. "About the only person that can beat Carth at chess is his wife, and that's only because she cheats."
"She only wins because I let her." Carth defended quickly and firmly with an offended look on his face.
"Like I said, she cheats." Atton agreed with a grin before he watched the farm boy, Luke, awkwardly waving around a lightsaber a training remote floating about, trying to block the stinging blasts. "Geez, kid, you really do suck at that. I know a blind girl who could do better than you."
When Luke glared at the man, the remote took advantage of his momentary distraction to hit him again. "Ow! Dammit, if you think this is so easy, let's see you do it!"
"Relax, kid. What he's not telling you is that the blind girl is one of the women who he's running from." Carth cut in with a grin on his lips as he let the protocol droid take over the chess table. "Though… he is right, you really do suck at that."
"It's my first time doing this! I'd like to see you do better!" The boy shot back challengingly.
"Carth… No." Atton spoke up quickly.
"What? He challenged me, you heard him." Carth answered back with a positively predatory grin on his face.
"Just… No. Remember what your wife would say." Everyone's attention was riveted firmly on Carth at that, so much so that they never saw Atton sneaking up, disabling the remote and replacing it with another, identical droid.
"Oh, come on…" Carth almost seemed to pout, before suddenly sighing once Atton was back in place. "Fine… Why don't you show us how it's done then, old man?"
The Jedi Knight arched his brow for a moment, before calmly shrugging his shoulders as he walked over and took his light saber from Luke and readied it. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt."
He completely missed the look of predatory anticipation that flashed in Atton's eyes as he readied himself before closing his eyes and focusing himself on the remote. "Begin."
The Jedi blocked the first blast with a calm, fluid efficiency, then the second with a similar ease. As he moved to the third, things quickly shifted. Suddenly the remote was spewing out a near constant stream of short, weaker, stinging little blasts that targeted every part of the man's body, seemingly targeting opposite portions of his body at the same time. The end result, was a number of startled yelps as blast after blast penetrated his defenses and struck his waiting body.
"Huh… that was rather… anticlimactic." Carth noted almost lamely as he lightly shook his head and watched the way the Jedi, Kenobi twisted and wroth beneath the remote's assault before he finally took pity on the man and snatched the remote and deactivated it.
It took the Jedi a moment to realize that the barrage had ended, before he lay there a moment, taking a deep, steadying, calming breath before slowly he turned his eyes around the room, and made note of how Atton was struggling not to laugh. As a look of realization slowly dawned across his eyes, Carth smirked at the man and shrugged his shoulders. "Well, I did warn you, he really doesn't like Jedi."
Snickering softly, Atton innocently held up the original, now deactivated remote before tossing it back and forth between his hands. "Hey, I thought someone as old and experienced in the force would be able to handle that routine, honest!"
"…" Obi-wan stared at the man, as he struggled to come up with a proper response, any response really. When that failed he slowly took a deep, calming breaths before releasing it. "And exactly WHAT routine was that?"
"Mmm? Oh that? It's… a secret of course." Atton shrugged his shoulders and smirked just a bit.
"If you don't mind returning the actual remote?" Obi-wan spoke up in a more than slightly stern voice as he lightly glared at the man, before suddenly he, Atton and Carth stiffened together, though with everyone's attention focused on the old Jedi they never noticed the other two's reaction.
"Ben?" Luke spoke up, a touch of uncertainty in his voice. "What's wrong?"
"I felt… a disturbance in the force, as if millions of voices had cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced." The man leaned back in his seat on the ground, his eyes distant as he slowly shook his head. "I… have never felt anything like that before."
Atton and Carth both met one another's eyes, before nodding their heads in unison as Atton set the remote down on the floor in front of Ben and moving back to immediately begin efficiently reassembling his blaster. As Atton went to work, Carth pulled out a suit of Mandalorian armor he quickly began to pull on with a practiced efficiency. When the eyes were turned onto him, he merely shrugged in response.
"What? I did mention I'm Mandalorian." As he carefully fitted the armor into place, he almost smirked as he saw the way the Jedi's eyes widened in almost disbelief.
"Expecting a fight?" Han asked with a note of amusement on his face as he rolled his eyes at the pair's actions.
"Again, Mandalorian. I always expect a fight." Carth agreed with a nod as he casually adjusted the various plates of armor.
"Huh… Ya know… that armor kinda looks like the one a bounty hunter who's come after me a couple of times wears." Han noted as he studied it a bit with narrowed eyes. "Only, Boba Fett's is green instead of the red and black."
"Ah, yes, Jango Fett's 'son' as it were." Obi-wan's head nodded slightly in thought as he briefly remembered the infamous bounty hunter's final battle against Mace Windu. "He too wore a similar armor."
"Again, Mandalorian armor. The design's been around for thousands of years now." Carth's lips twitched just a moment before he slowly shook his head. "Ever since the founding of the clans, since long before even the Mandalorian Wars and Exar Kun and Ulic Qel-Dromas."
"What? Who?" Luke spoke up, confusion written on his face and he glanced between Carth and Obi-wan.
Carth stared at the boy for a moment, before shaking his head with a look of annoyance on his face as he resumed strapping his armor into place.. "Damned ignorant farmboys."
"Hey!" There was a flash of anger across Luke's eyes as he glared back at the man.
"What'd the boy say this time?" Atton spoke up as he shifted his attention back to the two, his pistol reassembled and settled into place at his side as he started to strap a second one into place before pulling out a rifle.
"He doesn't know about the Manadorlian Wars, Exar Kun or Ulic Qel-Dromas." Carth spat back as he grumbled.
"And neither does the Jedi apparently, your point?" Atton shrugged as he pointed out the vague look of incomprehension on Kenobi's face.
"It's disgraceful." Carth's face twisted sourly as he shifted his glowering from Luke to his friend.
"Not everyone can be a historian you know." Atton pointed out with a chuckle.
"I'm going to guess it had something to do with Mandalorians?" Luke finally spoke up, before his voice carefully drawled with sarcasm. "What with the obsession you seem to have with all things Mandalorian."
"Oh, you have NO idea." Atton agreed with a quick nod of his head and a slow, visible shudder. "When he gets with the other two… Well, generally it either involves a lot of drinking and reminiscing or…"
"Or?" Obi-wan put forth, curious in spite of himself.
"A lot of property damage." Atton finished with a smirk as Carth pondered the words for a moment.
"Well, true enough." The admission was said with a cheery smile and a nod. "Then, my wife yells at me and your Echani pouts that we didn't invite her along for the fun."
"Yes, well your wife should've known the trouble she was signing up for when she married you." Atton agreed with a sage nod of his head.
"You'd think that, wouldn't you?" Carth pondered a moment, lightly rubbing his chin for a bit before grinning slightly as he shrugged his shoulders all the same. "Still got your generator?"
"Of course." Atton actually looked offended at that. "Do you have yours, or do I need to tell your twi'lek your head was filled with bantha poo again?"
"I will not deign that worthy of an answer." Carth huffed slightly and crossing his arms about his chest. "And she's not my twi'lek."
"Well you are her Mandalorian." Atton countered back with an innocent grin on his face.
"And see if I help you out again the next time they're fighting over you." Carth shot back with a glare and a shake of his head as he pulled his gauntlets on.
"…Crushgaunts?" Atton blinked slightly before giving the man a look. "Aren't those rather… illegal these days?"
"I do not recognize the laws of any Mandalore that does not bear the mask." Carth shot back haughtily. "Especially ones that started from the pawn of the True Sith in the Great Galactic War…" He paused then, before glaring Luke and Obi-wan. "And I swear, if you don't know about the Great Galactic War..."
"That one I know about." Luke responded defensively, his hands raising up quickly. "Big, bad empire came in, tried to conquer, we fought, and eventually beat em."
"The last major offensive of the Old Sith Empire." There was a slight nod from Obi-wan. "The one that lead to their extinction."
"Extinction, riiiiiiight." Atton drawled out with a roll of his eyes as the sarcasm dripped off his words. "Because, we all know, the Republic wasn't conquered by a Sith."
"You're only saying that because the blind girl was insufferably smug for a week instead of just her usual annoyingly smug self." Carth shot back and smirked just a bit before sighing slightly as he lightly pinched at the bridge of his nose before glancing into his pack as a visible debate crossed his face.
"Oh, just put it on already." Atton said in disgust. "The only ones who might recognize it anymore are Mandalorians anyway. Besides, it's not even the original."
"I know I know…" Carth muttered a bit before brushing the dark, wine colored armor set on a flexible black weave. "But, you know me."
"Do you two always talk in riddles?" Luke asked half curiously as he glanced between the pair.
"Nope, but it's fun to leave the Jedi guessing." Atton admitted with an unabashed grin on his face. "They take entirely too much pleasure in their riddles to be honest. Makes it sooooo satisfying to be the ones riddling them."
"You two speak so freely of Jedi… As if they weren't almost extinct." Obi-wan shook his head with an air of almost insult as he lightly glared at the two.
"Heh." Carth smirked softly at the man and shook his head. "Jedi and Sith are like cockroaches. You can never get rid of them all."
"No matter how much you might want to." Atton agreed with a grumbling mutter.
"Again, I point out you're unduly biased against Jedi." Carth countered for a moment, before pausing and considering his words. "Well, not unduly. You have very, very good reasons to be biased against Jedi…"
"I still don't understand how you can just get over what they did to you." Atton countered back as he huffed just slightly. "What they did to you was just as bad as what they did to me."
"True." Carth agreed with a knowing nod of his head. "But, I got my wife out of the deal, so…"
"True." Atton grudgingly echoed as he nodded back to his friend. "I suppose she would make up for it."
Obi-wan just stared at the two men, his mouth opening now and then as if to interject before shutting on its own as they continued. Finally he just reached up, pinching at the bridge of his nose and let loose as slow drawn out sigh. "And I thought Anakin was frustrating."
"My father?" Luke spoke up, suddenly rather curious as he looked eagerly at the old Jedi, who immediately fought back a groan.
"Yes… He could be… impulsive." Obi-wan allowed with a careful selection of his words.
"Ooooh. One of THOSE." Carth nodded his head as he jerked his head towards his companion. "Sounds like Atton. He used to have a problem following plans."
"A problem following plans?" Atton lightly glared at his friend. "I'll admit I did used to think with my heart more than…"
"Do recall the events that lead to Vrook and the rest of the blowhards exiling you." Carth pointed out, his face going strangely hard as he crossed his arms about his chest as he lightly glared at his friend.
" Oh… that." The words came almost blandly past the man's lips as he lightly nodded his head in acquiesce. "Yeah…"
"Yes. That." Carth agreed with a hardened glint to his eyes and a slow and deliberate nod of his head as he carefully pulled out a helmet and mask as he pulled it on his face and secured it into place as he glanced towards Han. "So, Boba Fett, the infamous bounty hunter."
"Yeah, met him a couple of times, escaped him a couple of times… you know how it goes." Han shrugged his shoulders almost negligently as he waved his hand.
"I suppose." Carth agreed, nodding his head quietly before settling into an almost grim silence.
"Don't mind him, he really doesn't much care for Fetts." Atton spoke up before shrugging as the expressionless mask turned onto him. "What? You do. Only Juhani disliked them as much as you do."
"And the rest like her." Carth countered with a grunt and a grumble before shaking his head as he carefully adjusted even more sections of the armor and began to add more and more pieces.
"Geez, what're you, expecting a war?" Luke stared at the man, who simply seemed to cock his helmeted head to the side as he regarded him for a moment.
"Well, he does have a good point…" Carth's voice was positively cheerful as he looked back at Atton and it took on an almost hopeful expression. "Do you think we'll get to have a war?"
"Well…" Atton paused a moment as he responded, eying the worried looking Jedi for a moment before shrugging his shoulders. "Sure, why not?"
"War is hardly something to look forward to." Obi-wan spoke up as a stern frown crossed his face. "War is…"
"Fun." The man in the Mandalorian armor cut in happily as they could hear the smile on his face.
"You'll have to forgive my friend. He is, as you might've noticed, a Mandalorian." Atton shook his head as he carefully began to double check his equipment. "You know how they are."
"He's a Jedi." Carth pointed out with a slow amused snicker. "And not just that, he's from one of the idiot incarnations of the Jedi."
"… Idiot incarnations?" Luke spoke up with a look of curiosity in his voice.
"Oh, you know, the whole make no attachments, let go of your emotions, become a mindless drone under strict and inflexible teachings that prohibit growth and hid the discoveries of the past." Atton noted with a bemused smile even as he never looked up from his equipment. "Also known as the reason that they get their asses handed to them by such a small number of Sith."
"Well, let's be honest." Carth cut in with a soft sigh. "The Sith are just as bad. All darkness and hatred and surrendering to your emotions and desires."
"This is true." Atton agreed with a sad nod of his head. "Not to mention how little self control they can end up having. I mean, look at this 'Emperor' that's out there. He does his big reveal, and then after years of playing things carefully, he immediately goes on a Dark side binge and over indulges like crazy."
"He did actually win though." Carth pointed out as he would stick a vibro knife into his boot. "Sent the Jedi packing."
"Not like it was the first time it's been done." Atton countered with a shrug of his shoulders.
Carth's voice took on an odd, almost dreamy quality as he answered. "Yes… I know."
"... I fear I don't want to know why his voice is like that." Obi-wan muttered softly as he slowly shook his head, watching the two with even more wariness than before.
"I thought the Jedi taught that fear lead to the dark-side?" Atton spoke up before glancing towards Carth. "Bad Carth, bad! You promised your wife you wouldn't send anymore Jedi onto the path to becoming Sith."
"No." The Mandalorian shook his head, giving the impression he was smirking beneath his mask. "I promised her I wouldn't go out of my way to turn anymore Jedi to the dark-side. I NEVER said I wouldn't drive them there by just being me."
"Ah, right, forgot about that." Atton paused a moment before considering his words a bit more carefully. "All right. Just remember you're the one that will have to deal with her."
"Please, like I haven't endured her tantrums before."
"I'll tell her you said that."
"Go ahead, I've still got plenty enough dirt on you to bury you so far in Coruscant that, well...."
"Hmph." Atton glared slightly back at the man before sighing just a bit as he holstered his blasters and raised his hands in surrender. "Fine, fine. I won't tell her about your illicit attempts in subverting poor, innocent..."
"Jedi? Innocent?" The disbelieving snort was followed immediately by a wry observation. "This coming from YOU of all people."
"You're right." Atton agreed after a moment's thought before he turned his head and glared at the thoroughly disturbed looking Kenobi. "Foul Jedi! Trying to drive a perverse sense of pity for your miserable existence onto me!"
"Miserable existence?" Luke spoke up, clearly confused as he glanced at the odd pair. "What would be so miserable about being a Jedi?"
"They look down on certain... practices." Atton confided in a rather loud, stage whisper. "Certain, rather... enjoyable practices."
"Yes, they try to avoid fights all the time. Where's the fun in that?" Carth agreed with an eager nod of his head.
"A Jedi seeks peace, not conflict." Obi-wan cut in as he crossed his arms about his chest. "They promote justice and seek to protect the weak..."
"Thank you." Atton cut in with a look of obvious relief on his face as he released an audible sigh. "You had me worried there for a second."
"The Jedi, Luke, have long been a force for..." The old man continued, before he was interupted for a moment.
"I thought for a second there, I had run into one of the few Jedi out there that didn't spew that hypocritical stream of runny bantha shit." Nodding his head sagely, Atton turned his head purposely ignored the laugh that escaped their captain's mouth as he turned his attention to Luke. "Now, you see kid... To be a 'proper' Jedi, they expect you to give up certain things."
"Like being able to enjoy a good fight." Carth put in quickly.
"Now, really, gentlemen..." Again the Jedi attempted to cut in only to be once more summarily ignored as Atton continued.
"Yes, like a good fight. A good drink. Gambling, Jokes, Pranks, Show original thoughts, any and all types of a family. But, all of that pales compared to one of the biggest, most important of things..." Atton paused a moment before he shuddered once more. "They expect you to give up... sex."
"Well, they do get them young, so they have enough time to beat it out of their minds before they even reach puberty." Carth pointed out with a slight quirk of his lips. "Why do you think so many of the attractive female twi'lek Jedi turn to the dark-side?"
"Personally, I always thought it was because they realized that too many of those dirty old Jedi Masters were hoping to get themselves some hot young twi'lek lovin.'" Atton supplied with a sudden smirk at Carth. "So, really, we should just have YOU be a Jedi Master. After all, you've had enough practice avoiding amorous twi'lek..."
"Wouldn't that just mean they'd be running away even more according to him?" Han observed with an amused smirk curling onto his lips.
"Very much so, hence why it's a horrible, horrible idea." Carth agreed with a quick nod of his head. "Not to mention, those robes chafe something fierce."
"True enough." Atton agreed with a reluctant nod of his head. "Not to mention the Sith have always had so much better fashion sense."
"Just don't let my wife hear you say that." Carth paused a moment, before pursing his lips softly. "Never once have I ever regretted winning her in that race."
"... You won your wife in a race?" Luke's eyes bugged out at that, staring incredulously at the Mandalorian.
"Well, I didn't ever mention it until I was convincing her to have a bit of... fun." Carth admitted and again, you could hear the broad smirk in his voice. "Turned out, a little bit of... reinventing of the second time we met was very... stimulating."
"Yes, and please don't remind me about the times the two of you reinvented the FIRST time you met." Atton made a face and shuddered softly. "You gave the girls... ideas." He paused, before adding a sudden, wicked smirk. "Not to mention you left your poor, poor little twi'lek so very, very frustrated."
"I still maintain that she isn't MY twi'lek, dammit." Carth grunted softly before shaking his head and glancing towards a wide eyed Luke. "Bottom line, kid. Being a Jedi sucks. Besides, if you weren't such a damned naïve farm boy, you'd realize that."
"Dammit, will you quit calling me that?!" Luke spoke up, his eyes flashing as he growled at Carth.
"Hmmm... Nope!" Carth responded with a pleased tone to his voice. "Fraid I just can't do that, kid."
"Great." Luke's face twisted sourly as he sighed and shook his head.
"Tell you what, kid. How about we find someone better than this old party line to teach you the ways of the force, without throwing in all that Jedi party line nonsense?" Atton spoke up with a smirk as he watched the kid with a twinkle in his eyes.
"I don't know... He says my dad was a Jedi..." Luke spoke up reluctantly as he glanced over towards Obi-wan, almost apologetically.
"And yet... here you are." Carth noted with a chuckle of amusement. "He must not have been very good at being the kind of Jedi they wanted."
For a moment, Obi-wan stayed silent, before a flash of pain rippled across the man's eyes as a soft admission left his lips. "No... He wasn't."
-o-o-o-
"So, what're we staring at." Atton spoke up curiously as he watched the looks of pure disbelief on the faces of the four people crowded into the cockpit before glancing around. "Huh... Someone feels the need to overcompensate."
"I think we might want to turn around." Obi-wan noted as the massive image of the Death Star loomed ever closer.
"You know, I think you're right." Han agreed even as he started to pull back on his throttle, only to immediately frown as the entire ship began to shake roughly in protest.
"Um... I'm going to guess that means something's wrong?" Atton ventured casually before smirking softly towards Han. "Ha! You owe Carth 10 credits!"
"Could we do this, you know, LATER?" Han barked out as he glanced over at the Wookiee. "Chewie! Pull up reserve power!"
As the Wookiee howled back at him, Han did his best to wrest the controls to pull back and away. "It's not working! They've got us in some kind of Tractor beam!"
"So, sounds like we're storming the castle?" Atton asked curiously before grinning and nodding his head. "Ah, fun!"
"Perhaps something a bit more... subtle?" Obi-wan put for the hedgingly.
"Oh, infiltration and demolition? Sure." Atton nodded his head with a sudden, odd gleam in his eyes. "Carth's gonna enjoy blowing up something THAT big."
"Force preserve us." Obi-wan muttered quickly before finally offering up a plan. "I was more thinking we could jettison some escape pods, and make use of the smuggler compartments Mr. Solo most assuredly has."
"Well, not as much fun as what I had planned, but I'm sure we can make it work." Atton agreed with a thoughtful nod of his head.
"… Why do I suddenly have a feeling I'm really, really going to regret ever agreeing to deal with this?" Han muttered softly as he glanced towards Chewie.
"Only for a short bit." Atton correct and grinned back at the man. "You'll be having too much fun by the time we're through with you."
-o-o-o-
Glancing down at the ambushed gantry officers laying unconscious in front of them, Carth was carefully adjusting something on his belt before he glanced towards the Jedi who had just spoke. "Mmm… Nah, I'm gonna head with the Jedi to make sure he stays out of trouble."
"I have the best chance of disabling the tractor beam's generator without being caught. Without being able to cloak yourself in the Force…" Obi-wan immediately began, only to blink and stare as the Mandalorian flicked a switch on his belt and suddenly faded from sight.
"There are other ways of not being caught, you know." The utterly amused quality of the man's voice made Obi-wan start, especially when it came from directly beside him instead of in front of him as the man had been previously.
"A stealth generator?" Obi-wan stared incredulously at the man before slowly shaking his head in disbelief. "How…? That's lost tech…"
"Nah, not lost, merely misplaced." Atton disagreed with a grin of his own as suddenly he too shimmered out of sight. "I'll stay with kiddies while you two run off and make sure that the tractor beam is down." He paused a moment before glancing at Carth's direction. "Still have those…?"
"Heh heh heh." The slow deliberate chuckle sent a shiver down Obi-wan's spine as the Jedi stared at the slight distortion in the air that gave away the only indication of Carth's presence.
"You know, normally I'd say I knew you were gonna volunteer and call you an old fool." Han noted as he carefully studied the pair. "But, to be perfectly honest? I find it far, far more believable that you'll get something done with the crazy, invisible Mandalorian along with you."
"I can assure you, I can do this on my own." Obi-wan protested once more as he looked reprovingly towards Carth.
"And yet, I'm still going with you. Imagine that." Carth responded with an audibly cheeky grin.
"Really, how about we have the little droid finish telling us what we need to know first?" Atton spoke up with a lazy drawl as he shimmered back into sight and gestured towards where R2D2 was accessing the terminal and bringing up the station's schematics. "Instead of just blindly rushing off."
"Well, I suppose a plan would be better." Carth admitted as he glanced down at the droid. "Pretty good slicer are you?"
The chirping beeps that answered him made the Mandalorian nod agreeably, though no one could quite see the motion. "I'll have to introduce you to T3 sometime. So, what've you got for us?"
An instant later, a view of the station sprouted up, and a explaining series of beeps met him back before a route was highlighted in red. After a moment's study, he quickly glanced at the droid once more. "And tell me, is there a route that wouldn't take us TOO far out of the way that would allow for a choice bit of… sabotage?"
After a moment listening to the droid, he nodded agreeably while the droid beeped back at him and another, slightly different path was shown, with glowing dots appearing at certain points. "Hmmm… Yes, that could work."
Suddenly, the droid began to make an excited series of chirps that caused Carth, Atton and C3PO to blink while the robot was the first to respond. "What do you mean you found her? Found WHO, R2?"
"Well, THAT is interesting." Carth smirked beneath his helmet before nodding towards the Obi-wan. "Well, old man, let's get going. We need to get a good distraction going."
"A distraction? Why?" Again there was confusion written on the man's face as he stared at the two.
"So the rest of us can rescue the princess, of course." Atton responded amiably as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
"Hold it, rescue the princess? What?" Han cut in quickly as he lightly glared at Atton. "Hey, I'm not going to just go risk my neck because someone wants to play the gallivanting knight."
"Wait, princess? As in Princess Leia?" Luke spoke up quickly before he was given a confirming nod from Atton, who grinned cheerfully back at the boy. "We have to rescue her! They'll execute her."
"Well you heard the kid." Atton agreed with a quick nod and a grin as he glanced over at Han. "We HAVE to save the princess."
"I've risked my neck enough already, if you think I'm going gallivanting around…" Han immediately began to protest once more.
"Well, she is a princess." Carth noted neutrally. "And you know, generally princesses do have deep pockets."
"Yeah, the reward would be…" Luke added agreeably with an eager nod of his head. "Well, more than you can imagine."
"I don't know kid, I can imagine a lot." Han argued back even as a slight gleam began to flash across his eyes.
"This is getting wholly too complicated." Ben muttered softly as he sighed in annoyance.
"So, we'll go save the princess, you two will deal with the tractor beam, and the droids… will hold down the fort." Carth noted agreeably before pausing as he grinned at R2. "I'm sure the little fella can amuse himself with some slicing while we're busy."
The sly series of beeps that escaped the astromech droid's speakers brought a happy little smile to Atton's face.
-o-o-o-
"He is here…" The imposing figure of Darth Vader paused a moment, his dark mask turning as he beheld the Grand Moff. "And… There is something… different. Something subtle I can't quite make out."
"Really, you can't honestly believe that Obi-wan Kenobi is still alive." Tarkin shook his head with a look of slight exasperation. "I mean, really… Surely he's dead by now."
"Do not under estimate the power of the Force." Vader turned his attention to the man, a glare suddenly felt, penetrating into the other man. "The Jedi once said the same of the Sith. Look where they ended because of it."
"The Jedi are extinct. You, my friend, are all that's left of their foolish religion." The Moff scoffed softly and shook his head dismissively before a quiet buzz rose up on his com link. "Yes."
"Governor Tarkin! We have an emergency in detention block A A-23… Wait… and we've got a series of conduit overloads across the station! Registering fires on levels…"
"The Princess! Put ALL sections on alert!" The man quickly snapped back with a flash of panic rippling across his eyes as he turned his attention towards the Sith.
"Still so certain that the Jedi are extinct, Tarkin?" There was a tone of mocking triumph in Vader's voice as the man slowly shook his head.
"If you're right… If you're right then he, and any of his compatriots must not be allowed to escape." Tarkin's imperious declaration fell flat with the panicked fear in his eyes.
"Escape is not his plan." There was a pause, before the Sith Lord seemed to still. "And yet.. I sense anxiety, frustration… uncertainty. Something has thrown him off. Curious…"
"Find out what's going on then."
"I plan to, Governor, I plan to."
-o-o-o-
"So, didn't you geniuses have an escape plan for this?" The Princess Leia asked with a sarcastic bite to her words while she glared at the three men and their Wookiee.
"Yes, I did." Atton agreed with a nod of his head before nodding towards Han. "Then the brainiac here decided to panic on the com link before I could take over."
"And what would you have done differently then?" Han shot back sarcastically as he glared at the man.
"Asked them to send a med team to handle a weapons misfire from when a transfer prisoner acted up." Atton shot back before shaking his head and rolling his eyes as he seemed to ponder visibly. "Hmm… I wonder if we've got enough cover for me to use a thermal detonator."
"You've got a thermal detonator?!" Han just stared at the man for a moment before shaking his head incredulously. "Why the hell do you have a thermal detonator on you?!"
"Because we're storming a space station that's the size of a moon?" Atton countered back as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
"What are you even DOING with a thermal detonator though!? You're supposed to be running from a pair of girls! What kind of man carries around a thermal detonator, but runs from a pair of women?!"
"You know, instead of taking it to being a statement about me cowardice, you could take it as the simple fact the girls are just THAT scary." Atton responded with a completely reasonable tone as he slowly shook his head. "Gimme a Sith Lord over them any day of the week. The Sith Lord I actually CAN use the thermal detonator on."
Han paused a moment, opening his mouth to answer back before the princess grabbed the blaster out of his hand and shot a nearby grate before growling out. "Never mind! Since we can't go back out that way… through the garbage chute!"
"Well, you all have fun with that." Atton agreed with a cheerful smile on his face before he walked over to the door and started to place a mine a short distance from where the troops would be entering. "You have a fresher on the Falcon, right?"
"You're not coming?" The Princess asked incredulously at the man. "You don't think you can take the entire…?"
"Well, I might, but no." Atton agreed readily as he finished setting the mine, before standing up and thumbing the controls at his waist, causing him to immediately vanish. "I have other tricks though."
"I don't suppose you can fit more than one under there?" Han asked hopefully as he eyed the destroyed grate with a look of disgust on his face.
"Fraid not. Besides, this way it'll take em longer to chase after you." Atton grinned back at the group. "I'll find out where it comes out and meet you there."
"Great," Han said sourly as he shook his head in mild disgust.
"Are you coming or not?" Leia demanded as she shouldered the rifle and dove down into the chute.
"Wonderful, either I'm going to kill her, or I'm beginning to like her." Han muttered before he heard Chewie let out particularly distressed sound. "I don't care what it is you smell down there, get your big furry…" And with that he gave the Wookiee a light kick on his ass and watched him disappear down the chute as rifle fire began to pour down the hallway.
"And that's our cue!" Luke shot off a few more rounds down the hallway, before he jumped into the grate himself.
Han continued to fire off at the stormtroopers for a few moment's longer as he steeled his nerves, before finally muttering angrily under his breath. "Dammit, I really, really hate this!"
And with that, he dove down the chute himself, leaving the hallway quite for a moment, save for an occasional, probing burst of fire. Finally, a few moments later, the group of storm troopers converged en masse towards the holding cells. The forerunners had just cleared the hallway, when they stepped into the proximity of the stealthed mine. What followed was less than pretty, but it allowed Atton to quietly slip past the soldiers in the resulting confusion.
-o-o-o-
"Must you cause chaos wherever you go?" Ben sighed with a slight tremor of frustration in his voice as he lightly glared back at the masked man who gave off every indication of smirking proudly at the various acts of sabotage he'd left their wake.
"Well, look at it this way, they'll be so busy with everything we've done to get here, they won't pay as much attention to something as simple as a change in settings to their generator." Carth shot back before shimmering into his stealth field once more as they entered the thrumming chamber. "Hmm.. Let's get this set properly."
"Yes, yes." Ben agreed as he walked up to the controls after a moment's observation of the room around them before carefully making a few, minor changes that brought things to change from blue to red.
"Mmm… not bad, not bad… but…" Carth slipped in and carefully made a few redirections in the controls himself.
At the curious look on Ben's face caused the Mandalorian to snicker just a bit. "Just redirecting the power demands through some of the couplings I already damaged. Should cause for some… spectacular results if they try to grab us again."
"Right…" Ben reluctantly agreed before he gave the man a curious look. "You seem to have some very… powerful opinions on Jedi."
"I know what they liked to forget. I know what they chose to ignore." The man responded with a sudden steel in his voice. "And I know a lot of the mistakes they chose to sweep away instead of learning from them. Your Order isn't as clean as you think it is."
"The Jedi Order has been defending the Republic for centuries." The man known as Ben insisted fervently.
"Right… Defending." The sarcasm was thick on Carth's voice as he shook his head. "We can argue this later, we've got incoming."
And as the two moved towards the edge of the room and carefully began to head towards the door, a group of storm troopers and an officer marched into the room.
-o-o-o-
"Man, do you four stink." Atton noted as he shimmered into view in front of the changing group, an amused smirk curled over his lips. "Glad I didn't have to take that route."
"Well, if we can just avoid taking anymore female advice, maybe we can get out of here without needing to burn everything we touch." Han growled out as he lightly glared at the smug looking man.
"Heh." Luke grinned a moment back at Han and Atton before shaking his head. "Come on, we can have fun later, let's get moving."
"Fun? FUN?! You call diving into a disposal chute, getting attacked by whatever the hell that thing was, the almost being crushed alive, FUN!?" Han stated with an incredulous glare back at Luke.
"Well, other than the disposal chute part…" Atton spoke up cheerfully, his eyes twinkling.
"Not a word out of you." Han growled and shook his head before pointing his finger at Luke next. "And YOU! I am NEVER listening to you again!"
"Was it something I said?" Luke asked almost innocently
"Maybe there's hope for you yet, farm boy." Atton chuckled softly and shook his head in amusement before glancing around.
"All right, I don't know who you all are, or where you came from, but from now on, you do as I tell you. Okay?" Leia finally spoke up as she glared at the four males and growled softly.
"No, not okay." Atton answered back with a smirk.
"Sorry, not really." Luke agreed as picked up where Atton left off.
"Excuse me? Look, your worshipfulness, take that stick out of your ass and get one thing straight. I take orders from ONE person. ME!"
"Then it's a wonder you're still alive." Leia shot back before glaring at the Wookiee in front of her. "Will someone this mangy walking carpet out of my way?!"
"Princess… I'm going to be nice and let you in on a little bit of advice." Atton was still smirking as he slowly shook his head. "If you suddenly stop making it worthwhile for him to rescue you, he will probably just leave you to the Imperials while the rest of us get out of here. After all, it's HIS ship."
"Yeah!" Han spoke up in quick agreement and a firm nod of his head as his arms crossed about his chest. "So get off your high horse or go back to your little cell and looming execution."
"… Let's just get out of here already." Leia ground out with a huff as she shook her head and started marching down the hallway.
"Lovely girl that." Atton noted with a slight smirk and a shake of his head. "Kind of reminds me of Carth's wife."
"Really?" Luke asked curiously as he glanced towards the Princess they were trailing behind. "That's kind of surprising."
"I said kind of for a reason. Carth's wife is a helluva lot scarier." Atton shot back with a bemused grin and a twinkle in his eyes.
"Then remind me to be long gone before she shows up." Han stated simply as he shook his head. "The princess is bad enough.