Thomas finished his work early. It is quiet in the hospital so he decides to go home early today.
On the way home, he thinks of his life nowadays. How is it possible that he, a simple boy from Glasgow, has achieved this. He can't still imagine, he survived the war, made a career. He's married to the sweetest woman in the world and there's a baby on the way.
Marriage has changed him. He is less impatient, more relaxed. He's happy with Kitty.
It hasn't always been easy. He even recalls the shock when he found out how Kitty was haunted by the shades of her past. The nightmares, the poor sleep, the memory of her first husband. He wished he could change it to something better and he tries to protect Kitty as much as possible. And who knows, maybe, if the baby is born, the memory of that creep will fade away.
Then he arrives at home and opens the door. Kitty is busy in the kitchen and that pulls a quick smile on his face. He thinks back and remembers how much effort it took her to run a decent meal together. How his mother came to her aid. How those two, his mother and Kitty, got along so well with each other.
He enters the kitchen and sees Kitty, standing at the stove. She stirs with a ladle in a pan and has a deep wrinkle on her forehead.
He walks over to her, standing behind her and while placing his arms round her, he kisses her neck and says, "Mmmm, smells good sweetheart".
Kitty reacts quasi wronged: "It will burn though, if you keep holding me so tight."
"Didn't mean the food," Thomas responds with a straight face.
"Oh Thomas, " Kitty tries to turn around, giggling.
He cannot keep his face straight and laughs with her, turning her around.
"But, you know what, you'll burn it, I'll eat it."
Kitty waves the ladle towards him whilst she says: "I thought you had a better opinion of your wife. I would never give you burnt food, at least, not nowadays."
Thomas grabs the ladle, hold it firmly, saying: "No one has a higher opinion of your cooking skills than your loving husband." He chuckles while Kitty rolls her eyes.
"Give me that spoon," she requires.
"Only if you ask it nicely ," Thomas responds.
"Dear loving husband, would you be so kind and give me back my spoon? Please?" Kitty asks and she stands, waiting and laughing.
"Oh well. But first a decent welcome, " he replies.
She looks at him, laughs and then kisses him. "Welcome home, dear."
After their meal, they are still at the table, Kitty tells that she today encountered Matron Carter. Matron had told her that she is soon going to India for a year.
"Really?" Asks Thomas.
"Yes, and she had a request for me, " says Kitty.
The fact is that Matron has always stayed in contact with Joan Livesy. Joan is still imprisoned and Matron visits her as much as she can, which practically is once a month.
"Oh, " says Thomas. He rubs his hand over his forehead and frowns, he has an idea of where this conversation is going. He thinks that he doesn't like it.
"Matron asked if I would visit Joan in her place. Otherwise, she will get no visitor." says Kitty. "Joan will probably set free soon, but in the meantime, it would be so annoying if no one visited her," talks Kitty further. "I'd like go, I found Joan a nice girl. What do you think?"
Thomas is silent. He thinks that it is a very bad idea. He is searching for the words when Kitty looks at him and says: "You don't like it, do you?"
"No, I don't like the idea of you visiting Joan" he responds.
"Why not?"
"Because she brought us all in danger back then, because" and then Kitty interrupts him, her cheeks flaming red.
"That's not true, that's a ridiculous thing to say" she says. "What danger was there, really? She only went to see her fiancé."
"Yes, and that fiancé happened to be a German. And in case you've forgotten, we were at war with Germany at the time."
He feels the anger rising through his body. He doesn't want to be angry with Kitty, but he has never understood the compassion she showed towards Joan.
"I don't want you to..." and Kitty interrupts him again.
"Do not tell me what I should or should not do, Thomas Gillan. Don't try to forbid me to do something you don't approve."
She suddenly falls silent, like she scared herself with her harsh words.
He looks at her, she is very angry too. Fierce, stubborn, with red cheeks and flickering eyes. God, he loves her, even if she's angry. He softens and speaks with a calm and low voice:
"I would never ever forbid you anything. I won't."
She is silent for a while, looks into his eyes and eventually, with a wobbly voice, she says:
"I won't visit her if that's a problem for you. But lets talk about it. Never ever try to forbid me something. I can't bear that.
I will not do it behind your back, I want to be honest with you. But you have to give me some space, you know."
She thinks back, remembering how things went on when she was married to Elliot. He often forbade her the things she wanted to do and so she did it secretly, hiding it from Elliot. She doesn't want to do that now, she wants to be clear with Thomas.
He leans over to her and caresses her hand. "I'm also worried," he explains. "You're pregnant. The prison is not a place where I like my wife to go, you see," he points out, looking suddenly very vulnerable.
"But well, why do you want to see her?"
Kitty thinks and then she formulates her words carefully. "I guess she must be really lonely there, inprisoned. I do not think she still has friends after that adventure. It must be awful for her. And I know how it feels when your whole environment and all your friends are turning their backs on you. I learned what it's like to be alone. That's why I want to see her, to let her know she's not entirely on her own."
Thomas suddenly understands that this, for Kitty, isn't only about Joan. It's also Kitty herself, struggling with her past, trying to do the right thing.
She looks at him with big, bright eyes and continues:
"I could have been a social outcast myself as well. A shamed woman, the risée..."
Thomas stops her by putting his hands on her cheeks. He pulls her head closer to his, looking into her eyes. Then he says: "There's nothing ashamed of you, darling. Nothing at all."
Kitty pulls her head back, looking at him while she says: "I would have done the same thing, you know. I mean, if you were a German, I would have gone through anything to hear something from or about you."
He looks at her an mutters: "I'm a Scot."
Kitty smiles: "Yes, I know. " She gives him a quick kiss and then she rises up to clean the table. Meanwhile, she says, "Let's both think about this, Thomas. "
He nods and stands up to help her with the dirty dishes.
The next day on his work, Thomas runs into Miles. Miles knows Thomas so long, he knows exactly when something is wrong and so he asks: "What's going on with you? No quarrels with the lady I hope?"
"Well, kind of," Thomas blurts out, immediately cursing himself. Why the hell does he say that against Miles?
"O, poor chap, the blessings of marriage, tell me all about it. Relieve your soul." Miles responds with a grin.
And Thomas tells him. About Joan, about Kitty and about her wish to visit Joan.
"I don't see the problem, I really don't, " says Miles.
"What?"utters Thomas. "What kind of a man do you think I am, to let my wife go to a place like that? I mean, it's not a pleasant place to be. And now, in her state." He falls suddenly silent, realizing that Miles is unaware of Kitty's pregnancy. Not that it's a secret, but he simply doesn't know yet.
Miles, of course, is alerted by the sudden silence of Thomas. He looks quizzically at Thomas's face and asks: "What is wrong with Kitty? Which state do you mean?"
"She's pregnant," responds Thomas.
"Well, congratulations," smiles Miles. "That's nice." He grins and says: "Father Tom. I guess I need some time to become used to the idea."
"Yes, it's wonderful. But it concerns me too," sighs Thomas.
"Well, you'll go with her, " says Miles. "Accompany her. Keep her safe. And I think it's a good thing to visit Joan. Send her my regards."
Thomas is flabbergasted. Why didn't he not get that idea himself?
"You see, you can't do without me, "says Miles proudly.
"Oh, stop it Miles," Thomas sights. "But thanks, it is really a good idea."
Thank you for reading. I really hope you'll like this. As always, comments, questions, suggestions, all your feedback is very, very welcome!