I just want to start off by saying I'm really disappointed in the reviews I've been receiving. I'm all for constructive criticism that can help my writing in any way and trust me I've received it over and over again but these recent reviews I've received are anything but constructive. Telling me that I've over done a scene and made it too dramatic? The whole point was supposed to be dramatic. It's a story first of all. Second of all its Ashley… when has she ever not been dramatic. People over react when they are angry all the time and their first reaction is to get mad and say things they don't mean. Nobody really thinks clearly when you're told that the person you are in love with betrayed your trust. If you're disappointed in the way it's going I can understand. Nobody wants to see their favorite characters break up but keep in mind not every relationship is perfect and things like this will happen. That's all I have to say about this. Thanks to the ones who are continuously supporting me and giving me constructive feedback whether it's good or bad to improve my writing. I greatly appreciate it. On with the story.

Who would have possibly thought that I'd be sitting on my couch in my underwear sobbing uncontrollably after seeing Ashley? Not me. The moment I saw her I had never been happier. She came back to me and I screwed it up. My feelings throughout her getting this record deal have never changed. Not only am I still so deeply in love with her but I'm still addicted to her. Being away from her months at a time has really taken a toll on me. There are nights where I want nothing more than to take a handful of Xanax and sleep away the pain. I just wanted her back and in return I ended up losing her. My whole world was falling apart and there was nothing I could do to stop the earthquake. I felt sick to my stomach at the thought of never getting to speak to that beautiful, loving, sexy woman again.

I no longer had the same option in high school where I could just go buy some pills off of Carmen like I used to do. So I did the next best option. I had gotten a bottle of vodka and started doing more shots. My whole body felt numb and my world was spinning. I felt a warm pair of arms wrap around me causing me to gasp.

Ashley?

I turn to see Brooke standing behind the arm rest and her head on my shoulder. I turned to her and pulled her on the couch with me before letting the sobs take over my body.

"Spence, what happened and why are you in your underwear?" She asked softly with her raspy voice.

"Sh- she came back for me. I told her about the k-kiss and she left me." I could barely breathe let alone speak. She ran her fingers through my hair trying to soothe me as I laid my head against her chest.

"Fuck Spencer." I hear her let out a frustrated sigh causing me to look at her.

"What?"

"Ashley left you for kissing me and the first thing you do is call me? Do you really think that's going to look good?" She was right. If I even had a chance of getting Ashley to come back to me I doubt the first thing she wants to hear is that Brooke came over after she left.

"I didn't know who else to call." I mumbled before pulling out of her embrace. I hugged my knees to my chest before resting my chin on them.

"In most cases I would be more than happy to be here for you but this is the wrong time to ask that of me. Ashley is upset because we kissed and she's not going to be happy that you turned to me for comfort as soon as things get rough with you guys."

"She told me that I didn't love her, Brooke. I love her so much and I can't live without her. I went through a lot of stuff in high school and she never left my side. She's my everything. I just can't do it." I ran my hands through my hair as I sighed out.

"Then you're going to have to prove it to her. Let her blow off some steam and let things settle and try to talk it out with her. In the mean time you're done drinking and you need to go sleep this off." She replied before standing up and grabbing the bottle off of the coffee table. I watched her go pour it down the drain before walking back to me. She held her hand out to me causing me to take it and I followed her to my bedroom. "Let's get you into some clothes." I sat down on my bed as she pulled a t shirt and some shorts out of my drawer. She helped me into the clothes before laying me back into my bed and pulling my blanket over me.

"Thanks, Brooke." I whispered as I felt my eyes go heavy.

"You're welcome, Spencer." Were the last words I heard her whisper as she ran her fingers through my hair.

I awoke with a pounding headache that caused me to groan. I winced as I opened my eyes and placed my hand over my eyes as the sun blinded me. I took my time getting adjusted to the light before rolling over. A cup of water was on the table next to a couple of aspirin. Brooke must have left it for me which means that last night really did happen. I wanted to cry but I had cried myself out and there was nothing left. I sat up slowly and popped the pills before taking a large gulp of water.

"You should have known better than to drink after I left." My head whipped over to find Ashley sitting in the chair that sits in the corner of the bedroom. I moved so fast that nausea swept over me and I began running to bathroom to empty the contents of my stomach. I felt her hands pull my hair off my shoulders so I didn't get anything in it. After my stomach calmed down she flushed the toilet and sat me down on the floor. I watched as she got a wash cloth and wetted it before handing it to me. As I wiped my face off she got a toothbrush and tooth paste before handing it to me. I quickly brushed my teeth before she helped me up to rinse my mouth out.

"I didn't think you would come back." I whispered as she walked me back to the bed.

"At first neither did I. I don't want to lose you Spencer. I thought we could talk it out. I know I over reacted a bit last night and I had all night to think about it as I watched you sleep." Her words melted my heart and I quickly jumped into her arms causing her to cradle me on her lap. Her scent soothed me as I nuzzled my face into her neck.

"I'm so sorry, Ashley. I was just hurting so much and I know it's not a good enough excuse. It just kind of happened and I wish I could take it back. More than anything I wish I could take it back."

She was quiet and I know she was thinking about what I said but the fact that she was stroking my back gave me some hope that she wouldn't leave me again. "Why'd you do it?"

Why'd I do it? That's a good question. Is it because I'm attracted to Brooke or was I just seeking comfort? "I did it because I wanted to feel wanted. I have felt so alone these past couple of months and I guess I felt like I mattered when she kissed me. I also realized that a kiss from anybody but you doesn't mean anything to me because only you matter and you're the only one I want kissing me."

She clasped my face in her hands before pushing it back so she could look at me. She slowly leaned forward and pressed her lips against mine. My heart fluttered as we fell into our familiar rhythm. Her lips were perfect and it's like they were made to mold with mine. I never wanted to lose this feeling. We had to pull away after we ran out of breath and she pressed her forehead against mine.

"I don't want anyone else's lips touching yours again. Ever." She mumbled causing me to nod frantically.

"I promise it won't happen again, Ash. I love you so much and I can't live without you." I stopped as I thought about me calling Brooke last night. "I have something else to tell you and you're probably going to leave me again." I muttered out as tears finally filled my eyes.

Her body tensed against mine and I didn't want to tell her but I knew I had to, "What is it?"

"I called her last night, after you left. She came over and nothing happened I swear I just—"

"I know." She knows? She knows I called Brooke last night and that she came over and she's still here?

"You're not mad?" I ask as I look at her in confusion.

She rolls her eyes at me and shakes her head, "I didn't say that. I was fucking livid when I came back and Brooke was walking out of our apartment. I had a few vulgar things to say to her but she was quick to stop me and told me that she was just there to make sure you were okay and that you kept saying that you loved me and didn't want to lose me. I didn't say anything else to her I just came in and slept on the couch until this morning and then I watched you sleep and I realized the kiss didn't matter. I don't know if you could ever do anything to make me really leave you. I love you too damn much."

The tears fled my eyes and I grabbed her as tight as I could as I sighed out in relief. "Do you have feelings for her?" I froze before pulling back and looking at her and I could see the fear in her eyes.

"Of course I don't. She's been here for me these past couple of months and it was really nice to have someone to lean on. I just let it get too far but no I don't have feelings for her."

"Good. That's all I needed to hear. I promise I'm going to be here more Spence. I don't want you to feel alone or feel like you need to lean on anyone but me. You're mine and you always will be." She mumbled before pressing her lips against my forehead. "This smart mind is mine." She then kissed my right above my eyelids. "These beautiful blue eyes are mine to get lost in." She moved down to my lips and placed a chaste kiss. "These lips that I love kissing are mine." She moved down to my chest before placing a kiss on my chest before placing one more kiss. "This heart belongs to me."

"Always." I sighed out at the sensation before running my fingers through her hair and pulling her back up to kiss me. "Ashley make love to me. I want you to touch me and make me yours."

"It would be my pleasure."

She leaned forward and pressed her lips against mine. It was soft and slow and we were enjoying the moment. I felt her fingers skim down to the bottom of my shirt before slowly sliding it up my stomach. We parted long enough for her to pull my shirt over my head and throw it to the floor. We fell back into rhythm as she unclasped my bra and let it go in the direction of my shirt. She pushed me back on the bed and I pulled her with me. Her hand slid up to my breast as she cupped it with her hand causing me to gasp and push myself into her. She was on her knees bending over me as she slid her hands down my arms before placing them above my head.

"Don't move them." She whispered huskily causing me to feel the wetness between my legs.

I gave her a nod as I stared into those dark chocolate orbs of hers. I wanted to cum for her and let her know I belonged to her and only her. She pressed her lips against mine but quickly placed chaste kisses on my cheek down to my neck before making her way to my breast. I closed my eyes as her mouth latched onto my nipple causing me groan. I went to move my hands to grab her hair but she bit down on my nipple causing me to let out a yelp.

"I said don't move." I was beyond turned on and she knew it. She moved from my breasts down to my stomach and to the top of my shorts before placing kisses at the edge. I bucked my hips up but she was quick to push me back down. Her fingers slid into my waistband before sliding both my shorts and underwear down my leg.

"You're mine Spencer. No one else is ever going to make you cum the way I do. You only belong to me. Do you understand?" She said as she lifted my leg and nipped and sucked on the inside of my thigh.

I had never seen her like this. She was so dominating and possessive. It was such a turn on. I looked down at her and could tell she was leaving marks on my body from how hard she was sucking. She was branding me and I didn't care. I loved every bit of it.

"I'm all yours baby. Only yours." I sighed out and then moaned as she blew on my center. I was burning with desire and badly needed release. "Make me yours, Ashley."

That set her off and she swiped her tongue against my clit causing me to yell out. I was so sensitive I almost came from that one touch.

"You're so wet for me, Spence. Do you want to cum?" Holy fucking shit! Yes! I wanted to cum so badly! Hell I just wanted to be able to move but she wouldn't let me.

"Yes! Please, baby! Make me cum for you!" I felt her grin against my thigh but that seemed to do the trick because she started sucking and licking my clit.

"Fuck! Oh fuck, baby. Fuck me!" I screamed out causing her to slam to fingers into me. "Ugh! Faster!"

She quickened her pace as she bit down on my clit and that was all it took for me to scream her name and cum for her. My walls convulsed for what seems like forever as she cleaned me up with her tongue. After I calmed down she slowly pulled her fingers out causing me to gasp. I was so sensitive from that explosive orgasm and she made sure not to touch my clit. She slowly crawled up to me before pulling me into her embrace.

"I love you so much, Ashley." I whispered as I felt myself falling asleep.

"I love you too, Spencer. So much." Were the last words I heard as I drifted off.

We woke back up later in the afternoon. I had woken her up in a really good way. Let's just say she woke up moaning my name. I had missed this, her touch, her lips, her voice, her scent, among other things. I never wanted her to leave me again. Moments like this where I am cuddled up into her side with her playing with my hair as we watch movies in bed makes me wish we could stay like this forever.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked as she ran her fingers up and down my back.

"I just wish you didn't have to leave again." I whispered not daring looking her in the eyes. I knew if I did I would start crying and I didn't want to ruin this moment.

"Just three more shows and I'll be home for a few months." The whole point is that after three months it's going to be like this again.

"Ash, I just want a normal relationship." I started to say as I sat up and faced her. "I want to come home and be able to tell you about my day and vice versa. I want to be able to make dinner with you and decide what nights we will go out and what nights we will stay in. Most of all I want to be able to kiss you good night and wake up to your face every day." I was clearly upset and she was quick to place a hand on my cheek which instantly soothed me. It's amazing how one touch can calm me down.

"I want all of the same things, Spence. I just—I want to make my dad proud." The last part was whispered and I was shocked. I didn't ever think about that.

"That is why you are doing this, because you want to make your dad proud?" I asked causing her to nod. "Baby he is going to be proud of you no matter what you do."

I could tell she was trying to process what I was saying but the tears were brimming and it broke my heart. "I have to finish the tour but once I'm done I'll be back for good."

Holy shit. She's not going to leave again? Should I feel bad she's giving everything up for me? Why does everything have to be so hard?

"I don't want you to do this and end up blaming me or have regrets." I whispered in fear.

"Baby I won't have any regrets. I want all the same things you do. I want to be home with you again."

"Promise?"

"On my heart."

Maybe things will get better. Only time will tell.

Thanks for the reviews guys! Just wanted to get this posted with a quickness but I appreciated the reviews for the last chapter!

shoutout to rain- You keep me sane with your words. Thank you for always inspiring me to better myself and making me feel worth it. I love you.