CHAPTER 12- A Nightingale Means Longing

The sunlight's warm rays peeked through the low-hanging boughs of the trees and chased the darkness away. It warmed my black pelt as I hurried after the warriors on the dawn patrol.

The attack from the foxes was still fresh in my mind, and Bramblestar had taken precautions to make sure that they didn't harm another cat: no kit was allowed out of camp, every apprentice must be accompanied by two warriors, and the elders had to stay in their dens for the majority of the time. I was with Lionblaze and Brackenfur, but still, I was wary.

I felt invisible eyes stare at me from the cover of the undergrowth. Their gazes bored into the back of my head. Yes, there's someone behind me, I would think, but whenever I turned around to look, there would be no one there.

Dewpaw huffed, "Scaredy-cat. If the foxes had been chasing me, I would have clawed their noses off then and there."

I paid no attention to his crude remarks. I had gotten used to them, and had learned to ignore him whenever he was around. His words were nothing but empty air and white dust.

The dawn patrol continued to mark the borders.

Snowpaw's ears suddenly pricked up, and he dove underneath a bush. I opened my mouth to ask what he was doing, but quickly, he reemerged. He had a mouse hanging from his jaws.

Brackenfur nodded with approval.

I ducked my head in embarrassment and looked away. When was the last time I had caught a mouse? Since never. I really was the worst hunter. We continued on in silence.

A rotten stench wafted towards me and I wrinkled my nose. Lilypaw said jokingly, "Hey, Dewpaw, I think you've got too much gas."

Dewpaw hissed, "Shut up."

Lionblaze mewed calmly, "We're just nearing the ShadowClan border. Don't worry, we'll leave after we've remarked our territory."

The horrid smell strengthened as we stepped closer and closer. My mind reeled and I choked back the urge to gag. So this was what ShadowClan cats smelled like.

I hurried away, anxious to leave, and nearly tripped over the carcass of a rabbit.

I leaned down to examine it. Had a fox been eating it? But no, the teeth marks were too large and ragged. Flies buzzed around the dried blood and tickled my eyes.

Lionblaze noticed me and trotted forward.

He narrowed his eyes when he saw the half-eaten, mangled corpse.

"So the ShadowClan cats have been stealing our prey, eh?" he growled. His fur began to bristle, and there was a dangerous gleam in his eye. I began to back away slowly.

I mewed, "We don't know for sure if it's ShadowClan. It could be a fox, or a dog, or something else."

Lionblaze nudged the dead rabbit in disgust. "Of course it's ShadowClan," he growled. "It's lying so close to their border. And their scent is all over it."

He looked up and called, "Brackenfur, come look at this!"

The elderly tom bounded forwards and sniffed at the carcass. He rumbled, "This is ShadowClan's doing, for sure. I'll tell Bramblestar right away."

I asked, "But it's only one rabbit. I don't think we should make such a big fuss over it."

Lionblaze and Brackenfur looked surprised. Dewpaw rolled his eyes, as if I had made a dumb statement.

I looked down and shuffled my paws as I felt their stares searing into me.

Brackenfur meowed gently, "Of course. I forgot. You're not a natural born forest cat, so of course you don't know."

I blinked in confusion.

He continued, "Every wild creature in the forest has the will to move on and continue living. It's the first rule of the wilderness. Everything has to live and push on until the very end. And sometimes, that forces us to do whatever we can to survive, even if it means risking lives and stealing prey.

"Food must be scarce in ShadowClan's territory, so that might be the reason they're stealing our prey. If we don't stop them, they'll take more and more until there will be no food left for ThunderClan."

I spoke up. "But it's just one little rabbit they took. Can't we just share it?"

Brackenfur sighed in exasperation.

Dewpaw meowed, "That's not the way the forest works, mouse-brain. Only the strong can survive, and they have to do anything they can to keep their rights, prey, and territory. It's either kill or be killed."

He added tauntingly, "Of course, you wouldn't understand, since you weren't forest-born."

I looked away shamefully.

Lionblaze slowly stood up and mewed, "That's enough, Dewpaw. Well, we'd better hurry up on the patrol and then tell Bramblestar about the prey-stealing. Come along, now."

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As soon as we finished our tasks for the day, Snowpaw and I hurried to our secret place. The sun was just going down, but still, the earth held in some of the warmth.

The long grass tickled my nose like green fingers, and I breathed in the warm, dusty smell of the land. A nightingale perched on a slender branch and sang the last notes of its dream song. It sounded melancholy and melodious at the same time, and its singing wrapped itself around us.

Snowpaw settled himself down next to me, and I looked up at the first stars appeared in the darkening violet air.

The sunset was so beautiful. It painted the orange sky with fireworks, with pink hues and reds, greens and purples.

Snowpaw murmured, "Hey, Ashley…I just want to let you know, if there's anything troubling you, you tell me, okay?"

I was surprised for a moment. "Sure."

The white apprentice mewed, "And don't listen to Dewpaw. His words are meaningless and his head is empty."

We watched the stars for a while in silence. They twinkled up there with a magic of their own. There were thousands of them, more than a thousand, more than a million. If they had voices, they would be singing a liquid song.

"Do you think we'll have to go to war with ShadowClan?" I asked uncertainly.

Snowpaw shrugged. "Maybe, if they don't stop stealing our prey." He didn't seem at all bothered by it. Maybe it was another instinct of wild cats, to not feel any fear during battle.

Of course, what was there for him to be afraid of? He had the best fighting skills, and whenever he was in trouble, he had a whole army of Clanmates to back him up and aid him.

Here, I had no one. My fur prickled at the feeling of a possible war. I was certain that I would be the first to die.

The stars harmonized, and before long, Snowpaw had fallen asleep. I let him lean on my shoulder as I felt his warm breath on my chest.

He was so fluffy and cute. I always had a soft spot for kittens. A human fetish, I guess.

I sighed with the wind and felt my mind wander to other places.

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I was dreaming that I was a star. I twinkled high up above the trees, up to the far off borders of the sky and beyond.

Down below me, I saw all the paths that I had crossed, all of the highways and hilltops, and the Lake. It glimmered in its depths like a mirror, and I admired my reflection.

I heard familiar voices echo from far away.

You shine brighter than any star, said Capella.

You smell like a bird of paradise. That's my favorite flower! chirped Snowkit.

Millie mewed quietly, I welcome you.

The prophecy says that a cat will arrive…and that she would come and help us all. You came. You came! the lost spirits whispered.

I looked down and saw my home, my real home, with my parents and family and friends.

The front lawn was lush with the short green grass, with tiny yellow flowers that nestled in between. A large bush with bright red blossoms nearly covered the entire wall. The pale shingles on the roof overlapped like fish scales, and the front door was unlocked and opened. Yes. It was just how I remembered it. And if I happened to take a peek at the backyard, there would be a swimming pool, and a scraggly orange tree, and roses and daises and hollyhocks bobbing up and down in the breeze.

My home, I thought. I willed myself to float down and down towards it. It was so close, I could almost touch it.

The open door began to close, very slowly. No! Wait for me! I'm almost there!

Something grabbed my arm, and I looked to see what it was.

It was Snowpaw, and he blinked at me with amber eyes. He mewled, Ashley, don't go. I'd miss you too much.

Capella was hanging on my other arm. Mistress, you must stay.

A cold wind brushed against me, and there was a very faint cat face. It was hardly there at all, and it was thin and transparent like a cloud. It rasped in a needling and almost forgotten voice, You must save us! Help us!

Another spirit wound its way across my arms and held me tight. Thou must stay, fair maiden. The prophecy says that a savior will come, and you came!

The third sighed, Stay. Stay.

Slowly, the front door of my house creaked closed, until only a thin strip of hope was left.

"No!" I yowled.

Snowpaw mewed, "Stay."

Capella rasped, "Stay."

The three lost souls whispered, "Stay with us."

The front door shut entirely.

I felt the tears move silently down my cheeks.

Snowpaw buried his face in my chest and sighed.