A.N: Hey guys. Here's the next chapter. Hope you like it. Thanks as always to all readers, and reviewers, as always, special thanks to you.
Just a quick note for those of you worried about Brooke being a rebound for Luke, she won't be. I don't want her to be a rebound either, or even seem like a rebound, which is why I have them progressing so slowly. Just thought you should know.
...
Nathan quirked a brow and a smile twisted his lips at the name he was pretty sure his little niece had just called him.
He'd been playing with her on the floor when Lucas announced that dinner was ready so he'd scooped his niece up high in the air and brought her to the kitchen to set her in her booster seat at the table. However, Sawyer didn't want down and she let him know it, both vocally and by clinging to his shirt, his arms, his hair, whatever she could snatch with her little hands and hold onto.
It was, surprisingly, quite the battle, considering the incredible size difference between the two—and, of course, for the fact Nathan didn't want to hurt her—but finally he was able to free himself and take his own seat at the table.
And that's when the two year old angrily hurled the name at him.
He glanced at Luke, still not certain he'd heard correctly. "Did she just...?"
"Call you a poo-poo head?" Lucas completed, a half smile on his own lips. "Yep. She's been saying that. Just ignore it."
Nathan chuckled softly, highly amused.
"Where did she pick that up?" Haley asked, as humored as her husband.
Lucas looked at Brooke who looked almost embarrassed. "Mommy and me class, if you can believe that. Another kid was saying it and she picked it up."
"That happens," Haley said, Lucas nodding in reply.
"You go to Mommy and me classes?" Nathan asked, a teasing note in his tone.
"No, but Brooke has been," Luke answered. "She's been taking Sawyer a few days a week."
Nathan's gaze narrowed. "Brooke has?" he questioned a little flatly.
Brooke didn't miss the not-so-subtle sneer on his face, and neither did anyone else, with the exception of Jamie.
"How come, Aunt Brooke?" Jamie asked innocently. "You're Sawyer's God mother, but you're not her real mom."
Exactly, Nathan thought. It should be Peyton.
"Well, it's just called that," Brooke began to explain. She directed her answer at Jamie, but knew full well that Nathan would be listening for it too. She wondered if Haley also found it out of place for her to take Sawyer to such a class. "But it doesn't have to be the mommy who goes," she continued. "It's just so Sawyer can have other kids to play with sometimes."
"Oh. So I could take her?" Jamie asked.
Brooke laughed her raspy laugh. "Pretty sure you have to be an adult, buddy."
"What do you do there?"
"All sorts of fun stuff for little kids. Color, paint, play games. Eat snacks."
"Cool. Are there any Daddy and me classes?"
"Umm, not sure about that one, bud, but I gotta tell ya, the other kids there are pretty small compared to you."
"Oh, never mind then," he said, no longer interested in going if it was only for little kids. "Did you take me when I was little?"
"No. Unfortunately, I wasn't around when you were that age."
"Where were you?"
"New York," she answered with an amused smile. "Anybody ever tell you you ask a lot of questions?"
"Yeah, everybody," the boy admitted. "Even you, Aunt Brooke. Miss Laruen said that's why I'm so smart," he added with a shrug.
"That's right," Lucas jumped in. "If you want to know something, you ask, right?"
"Right."
"Yeah," Haley said. "And sometimes you might actually get an honest answer."
Nathan sighed softly, not bothering to look at his wife, knowing she wouldn't be looking at him either. Was she trying to goad him into another fight here in front of everyone, or was she just hanging on to her resentment over their previous one? He figured it was the latter. Just subtly letting him know she was still mad.
It wasn't as subtle as they thought though. Lucas and Brooke looked from one to the other then to each other. They didn't know what it was about, but it wasn't hard to tell that something had gone down between those two before they'd arrived at Luke's. They weren't acting the loving couple who hadn't seen each other in six weeks like Lucas and Brooke had expected them to.
"So, what do you think of the roast?" Luke asked in an attempt to slice away at the tension that currently hung in the air.
"Delicious," Haley answered. "Nice and tender."
"Yeah," Nathan agreed. "It's good," he mumbled. "Really good."
And then silence again.
"So Nate," Luke tried again. "I have a favor to ask you."
"Ok," Nathan asked cautiously, hoping it wasn't money to fight Peyton in court again. He'd already been clear on that. "What is it?"
Luke began an explanation about how his editor was really after him to write faster so he was going to have to buckle down and get to it. "And Brooke's been watching Sawyer while I do that, but she's got meetings every day next week so..."
"What time you want me here?" Nathan cut in, Luke's favor pretty obvious.
"Anytime in the morning is fine. Thanks a lot, Nate."
Nathan shrugged. "Sure."
It wasn't a problem. First of all, he loved his little niece, second, he had nothing else to do anyway now that he was home, and Haley and Jamie would be gone all day. And third, his willingness to do this favor for Luke should surely show Haley that he wasn't opposed to helping his brother in every way. Just not when it tore mother and daughter apart.
He knew it worked, at least a little, when Haley sent him a brief smile of approval. He smiled back. At times it seemed he practically lived for that look, and would do anything to get it. Could it be he was out of the dog house now? He hoped so. He hated when she was mad at him.
"Guess what, Aunt Brooke?" Jamie piped in again when all went quiet once more.
"What, little man?"
"You're the third Aunt I see today."
"Am I now?"
"Yep. I saw Aunt Millie when me and Mouth went there for lunch, and then..."
"Mouth and I," Haley corrected gently.
"When Mouth and I went there for lunch," he re-phrased, used to the corrections. That's what happened when you had an English teacher for a mother. "And," he continued. "Aunt Peyton when we were going there. But she didn't see me. She was driving her car."
"Oh yeah?" Brooke responded as lightly as she could while wondering if the mention of Peyton would upset Lucas. Or even Nathan.
"Yeah. She was with a guy who played on the Ravens with my dad and Uncle Lucas," Jamie revealed innocently. "I saw him in the championship picture. Mouth said his name is Jake."
Without noticing he was doing it, Nathan's hands clenched into tight fists. What was she doing with Jagielski? It was when he glanced up and saw the look Brooke was shooting him that he knew he'd had a visible reaction and that she'd noticed it.
He quickly unclenched his fists and looked away, to Haley, just as Brooke did the same, to see if she'd noticed it too. Luckily, she was too busy looking across at Lucas to see his reaction. The blond Scott twisted his lips into a snarl, and he laughed, though it wasn't a laugh at all.
"You don't think Jake's...the guy, do you?" Haley wondered aloud.
Lucas shook his head after a long moment. "No. Jake's a friend. He wouldn't do that to me."
"He's also a guy who loved Peyton at one time," Haley reasoned. "If he still does, I don't know, love can be stronger than friendship, especially when you've lost touch with that friend for years."
Still Luke shook his head. "She said the dirt bag was married too," he said.
Nathan shovelled more food in his mouth, avoiding Brooke's harsh stare, yet still feeling it practically boring a hole right through him. She must find it amusing that he'd just been called a dirt bag and couldn't even defend himself.
"He could have gotten married in the years since you've seen him," Haley pointed out. "You don't know."
Brooke glanced at Luke now. He was seriously contemplating Haley's words. She turned back to Nathan. He still avoided her eyes—everyone's eyes actually. Would he just sit there while Lucas and Haley considered Jake as the evil culprit whose affair with Peyton had destroyed Luke's marriage? Apparently so. And why wouldn't he if it cast the doubt off himself? She shook her head. Well, she wasn't about to let Jake take the fall, even if he didn't know he was taking it. "Come on, you guys," she said. "You know it's not him. Jake's too decent a person to do something that low."
Haley seemed to ponder that a moment, and then she nodded agreeably. "Yeah, you're right," she conceded. "It takes the lowest form of scum to cheat on his wife with a married woman, and Jake just doesn't have that in him."
And now Nathan looked even more uncomfortable. His own wife had just unknowingly called him scum—the lowest form of it—and Brooke couldn't suppress a small smile over that. The sour look he subtly sent her made her smirk even more.
Inside he was seething. They were all so damn closed-minded. They had one view, that adultery was to be abhorred and those who committed it were...scum, dirt bags. Okay, yeah, he knew it was wrong, but it wasn't as cut and dry as all that. Not nearly as simple as they made it sound. They didn't consider that there could be real feelings involved, that it wasn't so easy to stay away from a person just because you know you should. They didn't take into account how alone one might feel in L.A. How the loneliness chipped away at your soul.
Damn it, if he could will himself to stop thinking of Peyton, to stop wanting her, stop missing her, loving her, he would. But they wouldn't understand that either. Brooke was proof of that, and it was pretty clear to him that if Haley and Lucas ever found out the truth, there would be no redemption for him from them. They would never forgive. And he suddenly felt very alone sitting there amongst his family, like he didn't belong there with the good people who didn't act on their wants and desires if they were wrong. He felt something very akin to shame for being one who did. Who always had. Brooke should be happy about that, he thought bitterly.
"Sorry Uncle Lucas," Jamie suddenly said.
"For what, buddy?"
"Mom said don't talk about Aunt Peyton but I forgot."
"It's ok," Luke assured the boy.
Taking him at his word, Jamie pressed on. "Are you gonna get a divorce?"
"I am."
"Because she loves another guy instead of you?"
Luke nodded. "That pretty much sums it up, yeah."
"Are you sad?"
"Ok," Haley stepped in to stop her son. "How about you eat your dinner and leave your poor Uncle Lucas alone."
"It's ok," Luke repeated. The kid was eight and he was confused. He expected the questions. "Sometimes I'm a little sad," he admitted to his nephew.
But Sawyer apparently didn't agree with that assessment, for she shook her little head and said, "No. Daddy not sad."
To her mind, he wasn't sad because if he was sad he'd be crying or have a sad face, and she never saw Daddy cry. Oh, the logic of a two year old.
And yet Nathan couldn't help but think again that even the adults in the room shared in such simple logic to a degree. At least to the point that they believed what they believed and there was no changing their opinions, or even mildly swaying them from those set ideas. Oh, to go back to that way of thinking when right was right and wrong was wrong, and there was no in-between.
But wait, he'd never been that way. Was never of that mind frame. Not really. There had always been more than one version of Nathan Scott; the guy who did good for the sake of good, the guy who did bad but with good intentions, and the guy who did whatever he pleased to accomplish some personal goal or to fulfill whatever selfish purpose he may have, even if it were bad.
Yeah, he definitely didn't belong here, he once again thought.
He spent the next several minutes watching the other three adults, and even Jamie who followed suit, try to distract Sawyer from the topic of 'mommy' after having heard the others discussing her so openly. He grew even more irritated by how little effort it took to side-track the two year old and the satisfied, almost smug, faces on the others because of it.
Granted, he didn't want Sawyer upset and crying either, but it seemed to him they would all be happy if the little girl forgot her mother entirely. He held his tongue—he had to—but it didn't sit right with him. Peyton would be so devastated if Sawyer were ever to forget her.
The rest of dinner wasn't any better for him as he picked up on the subtle routines Lucas and Brooke had developed regarding Sawyer's eating habits. The child sat between the two, and Brooke seemed to know as well as Lucas did which foods she would eat easily and which she would raise a fuss about, when she would try to squirm out of her seat...to cover the salt shaker and pretend to shake it onto her plate when Sawyer demanded salt. All little things, but tell-tale signs all the same. If Haley hadn't already mentioned it, it would be easy to tell they'd been spending a lot of time together, Lucas and Brooke. And Sawyer.
They acted like, like they were a family.
No wonder Sawyer didn't seem to miss having her mother around. Brooke had taken over the role. All through dinner he itched to say something, but he didn't because he knew it would upset Haley if he stuck up for Peyton again.
So he sat silently and just ate.
...
"So, how's your life Jake?" Peyton asked as they sipped on beer now, the tequila completely polished off, mostly due to her.
He looked at her in silent wonder. He knew she was wasted, yet she seemed more sober now than she had earlier before he'd left for dinner with his parents. It was weird because he knew she hadn't stopped drinking that whole time. It was almost as though she'd drank herself sober. But it was probably more like the food she'd eaten had succeeded in soaking up some of that alcohol.
"It's good," he answered. "No complaints."
"Yeah? Any special girl besides Jenny?"
A slow, almost shy smile crossed his features then. "There might be."
Her brows rising, she smiled back. That smile said more than just a 'might be'. "Well come on, dude, spill. What's she like?"
"She's great. Beautiful, smart, funny, and kind. So kind. She does all kinds of volunteer work and she's just...amazing. And she and Jenny get along like they've known each other forever."
"That's great, Jake. I'm so happy for you."
"Thanks Peyton. That's all I'm gonna say though," he said with a chuckle. "It's still fairly new and I don't want to do anything to jinx it."
"You won't," Peyton returned earnestly. "Why didn't you bring her with you to Tree Hill? I'd love to meet her."
"She had to work," he answered. "Besides it's too soon for her to meet everyone back home, especially my parents. Like I said, we're still new."
"But obviously you think the world of her already, and if you like her, I'm sure your parents will too."
"Oh, I'm not worried about that. I just don't want to freak her out by bringing her home to Mom and Dad so soon."
Peyton laughed heartily. "I think if you having an eleven year old daughter didn't freak her out, it's a safe bet nothing will."
"She's almost twelve, and you're probably right. I'm probably just over-thinking it."
She nodded in agreement. "So do I, at least, get her name?"
"Do I get your lover boy's name?" he responded coolly, though he was still quite curious about that.
She shook her head, still unwilling to give that out, even to Jake. No, especially to Jake. No matter what he said to the contrary, she knew if she told him, he would see her differently. "If I tell you, I'd have to kill you," she jested, hoping he'd let it go.
He did. She clearly wasn't ready to talk about it right now. Maybe someday she'd open up to him again. "Crystal Chambers," he said after a while. "That's her name."
Peyton responded with a smile. "Well Jagielski," she said in all seriousness. "This Crystal Chambers is one lucky girl."
"I'm the lucky one."
"So don't blow it," she teased.
"I have no intention to."
Of course he didn't. Jake was a nice, honorable, kind and dependable person. Such a far cry from the man she was in love with.
Such a far cry from herself too, she thought dismally. A far, far, cry. "I'm glad you came back tonight," she told him. "It can get pretty lonely around here, so it's nice to have a friend."
"We'll always be friends, Peyton. You can count on that."
...
"You and Luke seem cozy tonight," Nathan said as he and Brooke were in the kitchen loading the dishwasher—a job assigned them since neither had helped with the cooking.
Brooke took a deep breath, knowing by the way he'd made the comment that it wasn't just an observation. It was meant as an insult. She wouldn't rise to the bait. "Yeah? You and Haley don't," she replied in the same tone he'd used.
"You know you're not Sawyer's mother, right?" he brazenly threw out there. "Or Luke's wife."
"And you know you have no right to get jealous of Jake, right?" she countered smoothly.
He stiffened. "I'm not," he denied.
"Right," she said with disbelief. "You were clearly completely unaffected by the news she was with him today. I thought you two were over."
"We are."
"Not if you're jealous because she talked to an ex-boyfriend, you're not," Brooke remarked dryly. "You're still cheating on Haley."
Nathan shook his head in denial. He hadn't been with Peyton since before he went back to L.A. "I'm not," he said.
"You are if you're still thinking about Peyton in that way men think about women," she retorted. "It's called emotional cheating and, trust me, it's not much better than physical cheating."
He sneered at her comment. Did she expect he'd just forget about Peyton's existence like they tried to get Sawyer to do? "At least I'm not trying to jump in on my best friend's family," he returned flatly.
Frowning at the accusation, she turned startled eyes on him. "Excuse me?"
"You, Luke, Sawyer," Nathan answered. "You act like you're all one big happy family now. Except Sawyer already has a mother, Brooke, and it's not you. You don't belong in this scenario and you know it so why don't you all stop trying to make Sawyer forget Peyton. You know it's wrong."
Brooke pressed her lips together to keep from snapping at the nerve he had to talk to her about wrong behavior. "First of all, it's Luke's choice to keep Sawyer from Peyton, and right or wrong, it's his call and it has nothing to do with me. Second, if we're talking moral ethics here, you might want to sit this one out."
Ignoring her snarky barb, he went on. "Look, it's obvious what you're doing here, Brooke," he said. "And hey, I know the doctors say you can't have your own kids, but that's no reason to steal someone else's."
The reaction she had to that particular comment was swift and uninvited. It was still too tender an issue for her that she couldn't help what she did. Her hand instinctively drew back and her open palm swung forward to connect with his cheek in a loud smacking sound. It served him right since he'd hit her way below the belt with that comment.
His own hand went up automatically to soothe his stinging cheek as he stared at her with startled bewilderment. If he thought about it, he probably should have expected the slap, but he hadn't thought and he hadn't expected.
"How dare you!" she hissed in fury. "How dare you presume to know anything of what's going on here when you've only just come home today," she spat as quietly as her fury would let her. "And how dare you lecture me on a code of ethics your cheating ass apparently never had."
To her further dismay, he actually smirked. "This isn't a lecture, Brooke," he said calmly. "But it's also not my first trip home, and I do know what's going on. Or do you think I can't see that you've still been hung up on Luke since high school?"
It was her turn to be startled. She thought she'd hid it pretty well all these years. She opened her mouth to deny his question, but closed it when she couldn't bring herself to do it. Instead, she stared daggers at him. That ought to show him how pissed she was.
"Go ahead, tell me I'm wrong," he pressed.
But before she could utter another word, Haley appeared in the kitchen with a glass and a fork in hand. "Hey, don't mean to add to your work load, but you missed these two..." She stopped abruptly as the other two instantly went back to loading dishes. "What's going on?" she asked curiously.
"Nothing," both Nathan and Brooke denied in unison.
Haley's brows knit in confusion at the hasty, almost panicked, way they'd answered, and she stared at them suspiciously. She wasn't blind to the death glares they'd shot each other all through dinner, and the sudden hushness as soon as she'd entered the room told her the two had been discussing something pretty profound, perhaps even arguing. Not to mention the hand imprint still visible on Nathan's cheek certainly suggested that the smack they'd heard from the dining room was exactly what it had sounded like—a slap in the face.
But why would Brooke slap her husband?
It brought to mind Clay's drunken words at Tric a few weeks ago. She hadn't thought about them again until now. 'You hear me, Haley? He's not the perfect husband you imagine him to be. Just ask Brooke. She can tell you.'
She gazed at them another moment before a dry chuckle escaped her lips. "Come on, guys. What's up?" she asked, demanding an answer. Clearly something was.
...
A/N: Sorry to leave it like that guys. It was getting long so I had to stop it somewhere, and this seemed like a good place. Next chapter will pick up directly from where this one left off. It will also have a little face to face N/P for those who have been waiting on that. Thanks for reading.