"I know love," Matthew said, leaning over to kiss Mary's soft cheek. "But this is the last of the meetings in Berlin. After this project is done, I'm no longer going to be head of any future foreign transactions. I'm turning it over to Mika. And we can get a lot more accomplished remotely once the new computer interfaces are set up. I can be here and she can be in London or wherever and we can still work out any negotiations."
Mary's head leaned against the sofa back. Her legs outstretched on Matthew's lap. The nightly foot massages had become part of their new routine. A way to unwind and catch up. She usually loved it. A way to relax. Reconnect. But tonight she felt extra tense.
He switched to Mary's left foot.
The recent events on London's Westminster bridge had unnerved her. Matthew worked and lived close to the Houses of Parliament. Now he was traveling to Europe where there had been other scares in Paris and Nice.
They both knew there was nothing that could be done.
Life was uncertain anywhere.
But Mary worried nonetheless.
Matthew was so very precious to her now.
Matthew's kind eyes met Mary's. "Herr Müller is very old fashioned. He wants to meet with me alone and in person. We're closing on the property next week. I'll be back by Thursday."
She nodded, throwing off her gloom. "Abe starts tomorrow. Jerry is doubtful about his potential. But while he's young, I think he'll catch on to our routine."
"What else is on the agenda?" Matthew asked, trying to be subtle as he slowly began stroking her calves. His fingers stretching and inching up towards her inner thigh. "The builders coming to Crawley House to finally get the kitchen backsplash tiles installed?"
"Martin said they'd be done by the week end. I hope so as I've got Edith and Sybil insisting they get the tour." She shimmied down the sofa as his hands reached her rear, the stretchy material of the leggings making his tour of her curves and assets all that more welcoming.
"You're not staying at the House are you?" Matthew looked up from his tender ministrations. "It's not safe. There's debris everywhere. I told them to get rid of it but you might as well be talking some form of alien speech."
"I won't be staying." She reassured her mother hen husband. "It's not as bad as it was last time you were there, though. They've got all the wall down that blocked the view of the garden from the library and the lorry came and took all the masonry away."
"Good." Matthew returned to attention to Mary's body. He lifted himself up so that he could put his ear next to her growing belly. "Are they kicking or napping?"
The fetal movements began weeks ago as the twins fought for the confined space. Mary had felt them early in the morning. Around 2am the first punch from her belly woke her up.
She had gasped, at first in concern, and then astonishment.
Matthew grumbled beside her. He had arrived late from London and they had gone straight to bed. She was exhausted from the long day at the Stables office. Then a doctor's visit to make sure everything was good.
Mary wondered if she should wake her slumbering husband.
The kicks were like something out of a MMA fight that Sybil had her watch one time because she had the hots for Conor McGregor. The twins made their demands for attention known.
"Matthew." She had whispered.
Still he slept.
"Matthew!" A sibilant hiss.
Nothing.
Mary rolled her eyes and felt for his hand. She grasped it and placed fingers and palm of his hand right where the twin on the left was trying to win an Olympic medal in gymnastics.
Her eyes flicked between her belly and his eyes to see what his reaction would be and was rewarded when she felt the pressure of his fingers on her abdomen. Squeezing gently as he felt the kick.
Then his eyes flew open.
Blinked rapidly as what was happening flooded into his brain.
"Darling." He whispered. "It's happening."
Mary's overjoyed grin was infectious. "I know!"
He sat up on his elbow, never letting his other hand go of the wonderful miracle happening beneath Mary's soft skin. He rubbed gently.
Mary's hand came to rest upon his own.
Matthew's lips grazed her knuckles. "Darling. Darling, it's wonderful."
And they had spent the next hour giggling and trying to anticipate where the next kick or elbow jab would come.
Mary had gone to her OB and was told to monitor the number of kicks in the morning and evening. If she didn't feel anything for more than two hours, to call immediately.
That had alarmed her until Dr. Walsh reassured that her twins were healthy and no complications were expected.
So this had been going on for several weeks. Matthew, however, remained in utter astonishment every time it happened. And in absolute awe of Mary's resilience. She had kept up her exercise regime and diet studiously. Her weight gain was within her doctor's parameters. Her blood sugar under control. Her strength of will to maintain a perfect pregnancy while continuing to work and monitor the renovations at Crawley House made him love her and admire her until he thought his own heart would burst.
He had, without telling Mary, already informed Tom that he'd be handing over the reins of CB Properties to Branson and Jones earlier than expected. He could not in good conscience continue to work in London and travel while Mary did so much. Instead he'd take the extended leave of absence immediately after the trip to Berlin, using the time before Mary's due date to help her out while setting up his own consulting branch of CB in Ripon.
So now, on the eve of that last trip, Matthew felt both at ease and under strain to just get it all over with. He wanted to stay on this sofa forever.
Mary answered his query about the twins' movements. "Napping. They were giving me right good karate chops and jabs earlier though. It was as if they were fighting already."
Matthew made soothing sounds with his mouth as he lifted Mary's tee shirt and kissed the rounded form that held the twins beneath. "Don't disturb your mummy little chaps. She's protecting you and loves you very very much."
His kisses reached her breasts. His fingers massaging one as his lips grazed the other.
Mary's mouth twitched in delight. "I know your agenda." She said, catching her breath at his touch.
"Too right…" Matthew's silky, dark tones insinuated itself into her skin, making her shiver in anticipation. He pulled down her leggings and pushed her down on the sofa and unzipped his jeans.
She moaned deliciously as Matthew gently entered her and brought her to exquisite climax.
They had been warned about the potential for pre-term labor if their previous vigorous sex life had continued into the third trimester. But having been told that, Dr. Walsh then admitted other couples managed, despite the growing discomfort and logistics of positioning.
And so far they were managing quite nicely.
XX
"It's really taking shape." Edith admired the new tile work in the kitchen. "I love the colours."
Mary pleased as well took a look around. The kitchen had turned out exactly as she wanted. It had taken the most time at Crawley House, the rest being mostly a matter of paint and new furnishings. Once the wall had been taken down giving Matthew the view he wanted from the new library, the builders went to work on the kitchen.
Their first tour of the house had sent Mary into a kind of despair. Matthew had tried to minimize the amount of renovation that needed to be done, saying some new paint, new furnishing. He had scratched his head and gave his best boyish smile.
"I know you'll learn to love it."
And then they went into the kitchen where Mary's eyes almost bulged out of their sockets.
It had been a garish shade of green that Mary said "almost made me nauseous. And as I'm proud of the fact I hardly had any morning sickness that cannot be allowed to happen now."
Her distaste grew with every minute. The cabinets were large and ugly. The windows small. The "whatever that is" on the floor had to go immediately. She waved a dismissive hand.
Matthew looked down at the odd assortment of tiles and linoleum. The kitchen definitely had a mish mash '70s/'80s feel. At some point in its history a previous owner had tried to update the house to disastrous effect.
Mary groaned inwardly as she took in the window treatments. "Rather like bulbous plague victims wouldn't you say?" Spoken so dryly Matthew at first did not catch her sarcasm.
She gave him a wicked side eye.
Then he burst into laughter. "We'll change all of it my dear. I promise."
And so they did.
Matthew had gotten right to work finding contractors and builders, using as many locals as possible as well as sustainable products and eco-friendly materials. Mary had hired a design consultant who agreed with her idea to reconstruct the home as much as possible as it was in 1905 with a modern flair and sensibility. The kitchen would be airy and bright with new windows and overhead lights. A new Aga stove but stone flooring and appliances that did not clash but harmonized with the rest of the décor.
So having her sisters in for dinner just when the last finishing touches had been complete just that afternoon pleased Mary.
"I see Old Towne Antiques delivered it." Edith ran her hand along the beautiful cherry wood table top. "It fits just perfect in the space."
Mary's satisfied smile met her sister's. "Yes. Keela and I measured at the shop but I was still doubtful until it was delivered yesterday. The chairs will easily fit even with the two high chairs we found. We won't need them for a while but at least I know they'll fit quite nicely."
"We we we?" Sybil asked with a teasing tone. "I can't get my head around how much you two are connected. Can you not even make a choice about a high chair without Matthew's input? Time was you would make your own decisions."
Mary whipped her head around ready to bite her sister's head off with an acidic retort only to see her sister laughing and pointing at getting Mary's goat.
"Touché" Mary replied, recovering with aplomb. "I probably deserve that reminder. I do actually still find it unsettling how much we think alike. I find myself deliberately getting cross with him because of it."
"That sounds just like you." Edith interjected. "But I think it's right to find someone with whom you can have a meeting of the mind."
"But not to point where you bend to their will." Mary responded pulling out one of the chairs and sitting down.
"If they're right, why not?" Edith pointed out. "It's not weak to agree."
"That sounds just like you." Mary said coolly. "Men like it when women bill and coo and tell them how right they are. I'd never do that."
"Oh Mary you are impossible." Edith exclaimed in exasperation. "Do you really think Matthew would act like that?"
Mary thought about that. Time was, she realized, the two sisters would end such a discussion with Edith making a face and Mary stalking off triumphant.
Instead she deliberated Edith's question. Did she think that was the proper way to conduct a relationship? To be right was more important? How would that work over the course of a relationship? She had never really considered it as she had never thought of any other relationship in such long terms. But she was in this with Matthew.
Bonded. Loved. Until they both walked their last steps on this earth.
She had changed. She didn't like to admit it. To change for a man? Weakness she'd have scoffed. But no, it was more subtle, more important than that. She had become part of a team. A marriage. And she could no longer just think for herself. She had to take his thoughts, his ideas into consideration. It was not going to be an easy transition, she knew herself too well.
Plenty of good arguments, as they had joked. But instead of being angry or put out by it, Mary found herself looking forward it all. She wanted to be in this.
"No." She finally answered her sister. "you're right. I know Matthew wouldn't do that." She gave Edith a knowing look, not completely unwilling to give up all control. "Not that I'm likely to let him know that I know."
Sybil guffawed. "He's so in love with you I doubt he'd care. Those heart eyes give him away every time. I think he'd forgive you anything."
Mary doubted that. "Well I don't intend to test him."
And her undertone was caught by her siblings. Unlike someone else in their family who tested a marriage to a potential breaking point.
That sobering awareness made all the sisters fall silent.
Mary got up to put the kettle on. She had found some herbal tea to her liking and felt like a cup. The electrics had been reconnected that very morning.
The house was really taking shape. Matthew was due back from Berlin in two days and while she was to go to London to meet him at the station and have dinner with Isobel, they'd be able to finally set a move in date. Which she knew would please him no end. Living at Downton was proving a strain on Matthew and Robert. Not the old arguments, but with Cora away the younger couple felt an odd obligation to entertain Robert. Even as they had their own views on his actions, neither wanted to deliberately provoke him. But Matthew was running out of conversational topics. And Mary grew tired of Robert asking after Cora. Her mother had been evasive with all members of the family, emailing occasionally to inquire as to the twin's health and her pregnancy but never giving out any information on her return.
So after two and half months of this, Mary was just as eager now to move into their own home as Matthew.
Mary turned to her sisters. "Have either you heard from Mama?"
Both shook their heads negatively.
Edith asked, "You?"
Mary shrugged. "Not much. A few emails. She has never acted like this before when she went to Connecticut."
"She never had reason to be out of touch." Sybil pointed out. "She'd skype with Papa and make fun of him being unable to direct the camera towards his face. Now …."
She couldn't bring herself to say it.
"Now that she's left him…there's nothing left to say." Edith finished.
"Is that what we believe?" Mary unconsciously put her hand on her belly. To what she believed in.
"What else are we to think?" Sybil got up to pour herself a cup of tea. Not the herbal Mary chose but a strong black tea.
"I want to think she's just taking some time to work out her emotions. That they can overcome it."
"Do you think that's possible? I mean he cheated on her. What would you do?" Sybil pondered, looking at Mary. "Could you forgive? I couldn't."
That gave Mary pause. "It's not that cut and dried. You think you have one answer and then circumstances change."
"You're saying that because of Matthew." Sybil pointed out. "You don't want to accuse him of the same thing. Do you think his first wife will ever forgive?"
Mary sat back down again. "Perhaps. But he wasn't looking for her to forgive. Just accept. We want Mama to forgive and remain married. And that must be her decision alone."
"And then there's Peter." Edith reminded them. "Papa kept that a secret as well. From Mama. From all of us."
Mary's distant look was caught by Edith. "What? Did you know about him?"
Mary blinked and took a sip of tea. "No. I didn't know about Peter. But I did have a conversation last summer with Mama that I now see in a different light. She was warning me about getting involved with a married man. She said men can sometimes lose their way in a long marriage. I thought she was just telling me to be careful. But I now believe she knew more about Papa's affair than she let on. She knew about it. Forgave it. But is now struggling to live with not only the fact he never outright confessed about it but deliberately kept an illegitimate child hidden from her. From the family. That is something else entirely."
"It's like he's cheated on her all over again." Sybil muttered. "how many times is she supposed to forgive?"
"Can we?" Edith tentatively asked. "At some point we're all going to have to meet our half-brother aren't we?"
"Not until Mama and Papa settle things between them. He'd only be brought into the lion's den if we invited him now. I want to get to know him. To love him. But only if his new parents agree and everything is settled." Mary vocalized her thoughts.
"That makes sense." Sybil agreed reluctantly. "I admit to some curiosity about him. I used to dream about having someone younger than me in the family. A brother too."
"We'll welcome him no matter what. He's been through so much with his mother. It's best to let things lie for now." Edith finished their thoughts.
They all let it go for the moment.
"Shall I go ahead and order the take away? Pizza or Indian?" Mary held out her mobile. "The Aga hasn't been hooked up yet. The electrician's coming tomorrow to finish."
"Pizza." Sybil said. "Then I want to see the rest of this house. What else is on the first floor?"
"Go out into the hallway and turn left you'll see the day nursery and Matthew's office. I warned him having both so close to each other might not give him a moment's peace but he's too much in euphoria about the twins to listen. When they start bawling in unison he might change his mind."
"Oh Mary I love this wall painting. It's like they're in a garden." Sybil said, walking into the nursery where the two cotss were put in an L shape along both walls. The opposite burst with colors from wildflowers that started on the baseboards and grew up to the ceiling and across to the center of the room.
"It was my idea to extend the outside garden inside to this room." Mary explained. "I just couldn't' come up with a theme that wasn't just the same old same old toys or steam engines or teddy bears. The artist is a local girl. She's only 17 but look at it. I just love coming in here and seeing something new all the time. I told her as I'd be spending hours in this room feeding and changing I'd go mad if I didn't have something to look at. And this is what she came up with." The twining, twisting patterns of colours and types of flowers complemented the muted shades of the carpet and furnishings. "Isobel already bought me a couple different pumps for when I can't feed both boys when they want it. I have to say they're intimidating but everyone at the ante natal class says I'll get used to it."
"Not much longer." Edith said as she walked around the room. "And we'll be here to help. At least some of the time. I'd love to babysit." She took a rattle out of a wicker basket and shook it.
"I'll take you up on it then." Mary jumped on the offer. "Probably sooner than later. I want to get back to riding full time as soon as it's possible."
"What does Matthew have to say about that?" Edith riposted, going back to their earlier debate.
"He'll take the lead from me." Mary returned confidently. "He knows what I want."
"Especially if you have a full-time nanny to help out." Sybil couldn't resist adding. "you are going to do that right?"
"I…" Mary hesitated. "Matthew is irrationally opposed to such an idea." She left it there with her sisters but privately Mary knew that Matthew thought as he took a leave of absence and with the help of family, they could handle it all. He wanted to do it without having some outsider take care of his…of their children he had corrected. Mary knew, however that he'd come around.
"He'll see sense." She put a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "And then I'll handle it as well. It's simply a matter of timing."
Said with typical Mary certainty that neither sister vocally disagreed. But they did exchange an amused glance. Having the twins as living, breathing human beings would bring Matthew to his senses most probably, but it would also put Mary off her stride no matter how much bravado and confidence she exuded now.
And both sisters looked forward to that if they were to be completely honest. But they also knew they'd be there to help her when she was desperately up to her elbows in nappies and spit up.
XX
Mary was tucked up in bed at Downton. She was to leave in the morning for London and was preparing an email to Jerry about Mr. Banks' vet visit when her mobile went off.
She glanced down not expecting a call. Matthew had already messaged to say he was tied up in last minute negotiations and would see her in the next day.
Unsure at first at the international exchange, she realized it was her mother.
Mary grabbed the smartphone from the coverlet and answered.
"Mama." She tried not to sound anxious.
"Hello my dear." Her mother's flat American tone greeted her. It seemed to be accentuated with her stay in Connecticut.
"I'm so glad you called." Mary said.
"I didn't mean to leave it so long. It just got away from me. My mother's had some health issues and I've been in and out of the hospital with her. It was just as well I came home when I did for I'm not sure she'd have had her heart looked at. Turns out she'll need a stent to clear this blockage. So I won't be home for another week or so."
"So you are coming back?" Mary couldn't stifle her relief.
"I wouldn't miss the birth of my grandsons for anything. How was your last check up? I know you said in your email that it was yesterday."
"We're entering the last stretch. Dr. Walsh is threatening bed rest again if I don't put my feet up more and relax. But all was fine. Their heartbeats are strong and their kicking like they want out now. For sure they're running out of room as it feels like a full rugby team against my stomach." Mary laughed as once again she felt the waves of rolling pressure in her abdomen. "George is certainly in charge. His kicks might be the death of me."
"So you've decided to go with George and Jeremy?" Cora asked. "I do like those."
"Yes. Matthew caved after I nixed his jokey attempt at naming. Sebastian and Benedict indeed? What are we having I asked. Babies or marvel comic book superheroes? I told him to get off the telly when he's trying to be serious."
The two women laughed.
"I'm going to stay with the Russells in Ripon when I come home." Cora informed her daughter. She wanted no expectation of some reunion at Downton.
"Oh…" Mary's long sigh was answer enough.
"I want to be there for you and Matthew. I want your father there too. We are family. I'm not just ready yet to say what the future holds."
Mary could feel the pain in her mother's voice. "I see." She wondered if she should suggest something. Counseling?
"After the birth and you're settled I think Robert and I should take some time away together. Sort things between us. I can't do that at home. There's too many memories there for me to think rationally. He knows what he's done. I don't want to dredge it all up. But I can't go on without an understanding."
Mary took hope at her mother's desire to at least begin the process of healing. "That sounds like the right thing to do."
"How is he?" And again Mary heard the crack in her voice. The pain. The hurt. The love.
"He's despondent." Mary admitted truthfully. "Driving Matthew and I a bit mad with his meandering conversations. But he's in good health. Recovering well his doctor says. I know he'll take heart at your return."
"We'll see what the future holds. I'm taking all this one day at a time." Cora did not want Mary to wish for something that wasn't in her power to give right now.
The two women rang off wishing each other a good night.
Mary slept well despite the growing discomfort of never finding a position in which both she and the twins were able to agree upon.
In the morning she'd see Matthew and by the following week her mother would be home.
It was enough.
XX
I hope this enough for all you wonderful readers of this story. I know I took some time off… erm… ::Legion:: and ::Beauty and the Beast:: kinda got in the way of writing lol. As well as some travel and family and work stuff. But I think I'm back in the stride of this story. Matthew's return, dinner with Isobel, and an awkward family reunion is up next! Love all your wonderful reviews. They make my day sweeter!