December 19, 2003

Sycamore Street – Falls Church, Virginia

1728 Eastern

The week had flown by, while Harm had been clearing out his office at JAG Headquarters and wrapping up his cases. Mostly, they were the remaining backlog from when he had returned to duty. Today had been his last day, with the next two weeks being leave time during which he would get everything ready for the transfer to London. Mattie's school started its winter break next week as well, so she would be around to help. As for leaving Virginia to move to England, the teen wasn't really saying much about that. Harm had found a number of sites that the military maintained to introduce newly arriving personnel to the area. He had also told her about the travel opportunities they would have, even visiting other countries on tours.

Beth had spoken to her detailer in BUPERS about the upcoming marriage and requested spousal colocation. She was going to be taking a posting in the US Embassy in London as part of the Office of Defense Cooperation. The only problem was the fact that she'd just be posted to the Academy, which meant that a mid-year replacement had had to be found quickly. She just had the final exams left to grade and then post the semester's final grades. After that, it would be taking care of the wedding and packing for the move.

Harm had looked into the housing situation facing them when they got to London and wasn't overly enthused by the prospects. Their first choice was to stay in housing allotted to military personnel assigned to England. The houses had looked fine in the brochures he'd been given, but they were all an hour or more away from his office and the Embassy. The other side of things was renting something nearer to the embassy and applying for the housing allowance.

To this end, he'd contacted an agent in London to get a list of what was possible. The results now occupied the desk in his home office and were shocking, even by Washington standards. Not knowing the area and what were the better parts of London meant that he was going by appearance and price, assuming that the higher priced areas would be in the better sections of town. So, Harm now had a dozen possible apartments and houses from which to choose. All very nice, all very expensive. He'd sorted through them, stacking the pages in the order of his preference. When Beth came for the weekend, he'd show them to her and have her give her opinion.

The sound of the doorbell pulled Harm from the papers, for which he was extremely thankful. However, he was also curious as to who was at the door. Standing up, he left the office and walked down the hall. Going down the stairs, he saw that Mattie had already answered the door. However, from his position, he was unable to see who was outside. It was clear, though, that Mattie didn't know who it was either.

"Is Harm at home?" came a woman's voice that instantly brought a smile to Harm's face and caused him to hurry down the last steps.

"Mom, what are you doing here?" Harm asked as he moved past Mattie.

"Well, I thought that Elizabeth could use some help with the wedding preparations, darling. So, we came out a few days early," Trish Burnett told him as she hugged her son.

"We? You mean Frank's here too?"

"Of course I am," Frank said as he came up the walk. "We even made a stop on the way here and picked up someone else, as well."

Harm was stunned as he watched an older woman with long, white hair walk towards him aided by a cane. He moved past his mother and Frank to sweep her into a breathtaking hug, lifting her off the ground. The others could only watch in amusement as she struck at him with the cane, playfully demanding to be let down.

"Harmon Rabb, don't let your wife-to-be see you carrying on like that or she'll think you're one of those sailors with a girl in every port," Sarah Rabb said with a grin.

"You're the only other woman for me," Harm told her with a smile. "I've missed you, Grandma."

"Huh, not too much, considering it's only a few hours from here to Belleville and you rarely come for a visit."

"Well, you see more of him than I do, Sarah," Trish told her.

"I would think so, given the distances. Maybe now that you're getting married, we can talk your better half into making you come and visit your family," Sarah said, looking over at Harm.

"Yes, Ma'am," was all Harm could say as he led his family into the house. Mattie had been standing by the hallway watching and was now nervously awaiting meeting Harm's family. Seeing her and the look on her face, Trish made straight for the teen.

"You must be Mattie," Trish said as she approached. Mattie brought her hand up to give the woman she knew was Harm's mother, only to see the hand ignored.

"No, dear. In this family, we don't do handshakes. We hug one another, especially when we're welcoming a new member to the family."

Mattie's eyes lit up on hearing that and she stepped into the embrace. A moment later, she felt another pair of arms wrap around her. Looking over her shoulder, she saw Harm's Grandma Sarah had joined them. Mattie moved one of her arms from around Trish to pull Sarah into the hug. None of the women saw the smiles that were on Harm and Frank's faces.

Eventually, the women pulled apart but only so that they could move to the living room. Here, Trish and Sarah took the couch, with Mattie sandwiched between them. Harm and Frank each sat down in a chair.

"So, Harm, how are things coming for the wedding?" Trish asked.

"The ceremony is well in hand. I spoke with Chaplain Turner on Tuesday and he said he would do the ceremony. Bud and I have our dress whites cleaned and pressed, waiting in the master bedroom here. You'll have to ask Beth about her dress and Mattie's, because she's told me I don't have a need to know," Harm said.

"And the reception or were you doing something here?" Frank asked.

"I was thinking here, just a simple dinner for the family."

Frank and Trish exchanged a glance, which Harm easily caught and interrupted as disagreement.

"What are you two planning?" Harm asked.

"Well, I talked to someone and found out that the Willard has an available room that they use for smaller wedding parties. So, your mother and I reserved it for Christmas Eve," Frank said.

"Frank, I can't ask you to do that."

"Harm, you didn't ask. Your mother and I did it because we wanted to. Besides, I don't think I've seen your mother happier than she's been since you said you were going married. We've also reserved a couple of suites for Christmas Eve and Christmas day, in addition to the one we took for our visit."

"Frank…"

"Harm, stop arguing and just say thank you," Beth said from the entryway to the living room, where she had been silently standing for the last minute or so.

Harm got out of his chair and wrapped Beth into a warm embrace while sharing a tender kiss, drawing smiles from his mother and grandmother. They could both see the genuine happiness on Harm's face as he held this woman and the look of love in her eyes for him. Both women silently approved the pairing. When they finally separated, Harm led Beth over to the couch.

"Mom, Grandma. I want you both to meet Elizabeth Hawkes. Beth, this is my mother, Patricia Burnett, and my grandmother, Sarah Rabb."

"I'm very pleased to finally meet you, Beth," Trish told the younger woman as she stood up and folded her into an embrace.

"I'm pleased to meet you too, Ma'am," Beth replied.

"What did I tell you about that, Beth? It's not Ma'am, it's either Trish or Mom."

"And that goes for me too, Beth," Grandma Sarah put in. "You'll call me what Harm does and that's Grandma, understood?"

"Yes, Ma'am," Beth said, an impish grin crossing her face, one seen by both Trish and Sarah.

"I can see what drew Harm to you, dear," Sarah said, "but don't you think a pretty young woman like yourself couldn't have found someone better than my grandson?"

"Sarah's right, Beth. I mean, I love him, but that man is never on time. He rarely calls and hardly ever visits, even when he's less than an hour away."

"All that may be true, Trish," Beth replied, noticing the teasing twinkle in the other women's eyes, "but I happen to love this man too much to go looking for something better. More importantly, he loves me more than I ever hoped anyone would."

"Loving you is the easiest thing I've ever done," Harm told her, wrapping his arms around her from behind. The women in the room all melted slightly at the words, shocked to some degree to hear them from Harm's mouth. Both Trish and Sarah had, to a certain degree, resigned themselves to Harm being the last of the Rabbs. They both believed that the death of his father coupled with the death of Diane had combined to prevent Harm from being able to express love, certainly on the level needed for a marriage. They both thanked heaven for whatever magic Beth had worked on him that had gotten this result, little knowing that Beth was the thankful one. She treasured the fact that she was the one blessed to have won this man's love.

After a few moments, Frank mentioned dinner, causing an embarrassed look to cross Harm's face. He had been supposed to have been cooking by the time Beth had arrived, but the events of the evening had changed those plans. Fortunately, Frank also suggested that the whole family go out to dinner. With Harm knowing the area, the choice was left up to him. So, taking into account the tastes of those present, he led them to an Italian restaurant.

The remainder of the evening was spent with Harm's family getting to know Beth and Mattie. When they heard that Beth still hadn't chosen her wedding dress, Trish and Sarah insisted on taking her and Mattie shopping tomorrow. Frank and Harm were firmly told that their presence was not desired, which brought a laugh as a relieved look crossed both men's faces. After returning to the house, Harm suggested that Frank, his mother and Grandma stay there rather than at the hotel. The guest rooms were quickly allocated. Sarah would have the room downstairs, while Frank and Trish took the spare room upstairs.

Mattie managed to provide an amusing moment when she asked innocently (or not so innocently) where Beth was going to stay if both guest rooms were full. Harm and Beth both blushed as they stared at the teen, which drew a chuckle for the other adults. None of them assumed that Beth and Harm weren't sharing a bed, it being 2003 rather than 1963 and the pair were due to be married in less than a week. Mattie did have the good grace to look shamed as she saw the blushing Harm and Beth, before racing off to her bedroom. Harm and Frank went out to the car to collect the luggage and bring it into the house, before everyone retired for the night.

Somewhere over the Pacific, En Route to Hawaii

2128 Eastern/1628 Hawaiian

Mac sat in the business class section of the aircraft, having decided to spend a little extra to upgrade her seat. More than ten hours in the air was going to be bad enough without being cramped and caged in a too small seat, probably stuck next to some guy trying to pick her up. Instead, she'd gotten a reasonably comfortable seat next to a businessman who was settled into the seat next to her, going through some paperwork he'd brought aboard. Even dinner had barely disturbed the man, serving to give Mac the time to think that she both wanted and dreaded.

What was wrong with her? She felt like her emotions had been thrown into a blender set on high, before being set to boil. Everything just kept bubbling up, from rage to terror to pity and worthlessness. Take her reaction to Harm at Clay's showing. The slap had come out of nowhere, as had the anger and hatred she'd felt for the man. Yet, watching his car drive away had left her in tears.

And why was it that every time she and Harm had gotten close and he had been available, why had she pushed him away? Looking back, she could easily see how she had misread the situation in Sydney, finally understanding that he wasn't rejecting her but simply asking for time to find his place again. In the moment though, all she took it for was rejection, an unwillingness to commit. So, when Mic had been willing, she'd taken his ring.

The big one, though, had to be Paraguay. Harm had given up everything to find her, to save her. In spite of that, she'd pushed him away again, telling him that there would never be an "us" and that a relationship would be impossible for them. She'd chosen to go to Clay, a man that was about as opposite as possible from Harmon Rabb. Clay's world was a world of secrets and deception, need to know and unexplained absences. Harm's was one of duty and loyalty, the search for the truth no matter what that might be and promises made that were kept.

A shocking realization came to Mac in that moment, a realization that might explain a lot. In her mind, Harm was the knight in shining armor, pure and noble. When he committed to something, the cause was worthy and just. His search for his father, helping Dar-Lin and finding Annie's murderer, watching out for the wives and families of friends who'd lost their lives. And a secret part of Mac knew she wasn't worthy of such a man, that her past in many ways condemned her. She was responsible for the death of her friend when she'd been a teenager, she was responsible for the death of her husband, and in her mind she was even responsible for the death of Dalton.

Looking at things with a startling clarity, she now saw why she'd pushed Harm away. He was too good for her, he deserved someone better than Sarah MacKenzie. Yet, there was that part of her that desperately wanted to be worthy of his love and that got jealous of the other women in his life, like Annie, Jordan, Renee and even Skates. That feeling of unworthiness was what drove her to push Harm away and why she was with men like Dalton, Mic and Clay. None of them were bad men, per se, just flawed men and that's all she felt she deserved.

Laying her head back in her seat, she didn't notice the man next to her taking in the closing of her eyes. He had been fascinated with the beautiful woman since the moment she'd sat down. The pair had spoken very briefly when the flight was boarding, simply the polite small talk that fellow travelers exchanged before a long flight. Somehow, he'd sensed something wasn't right with her, a certain sadness in her eyes that seemed to come and go, as if willed away.

Something in the way she spoke also hinted at a desire to be left alone, so he'd buried himself in paperwork. Only, he'd slowly come to realize, he wasn't doing a good job of it, as he seemed to keep losing his place and ended up rereading entire paragraphs that he'd already read. His eyes kept being drawn over to her, studying her face, her eyes and her hands. Observation was something he excelled at, as he noticed the bagginess under her eyes, the red lips that matched her finger nails and the light tan of her skin that went so well with the chocolate color of her hair. No rings were evident, yet there was evidence that one had recently been removed, which may explain her sadness.

Yet, he'd been involved in enough relationship to know when not to pry and the woman may as well have been wearing a sign that said "Leave Me the Hell Alone". So, he just sat there and observed, a little more openly now that she appeared to be asleep but still instantly ready to turn his attention back to the papers in front of him if necessary. Besides, the flight was due to land in a couple of hours and he'd probably never see her again.