Chapter 27

After sitting with Hotch for the time allowed by the doctors, Haley and JJ walked out of his room, and were at once surrounded by the others. JJ was wiping her cheeks and offered a small smile.

"Are you all right, buttercup?" asked Garcia looking at JJ with concerned eyes. She noticed how affected her friend was after having seen their boss and friend.

"I'm fine, Garcia," JJ stammered. "It's just so hard to see Hotch like that. I'm so use to him full of life and energy, and him laying so still is hard."

Rossi nodded his understanding before turning his attention to Haley. "And how are you holding up, kiddo?"

Haley shrugged and let out a deep breath. "I'm all right. It's just that every time I look at Aaron, I keep expecting him to open his eyes and talk to me. It's hard seeing him like this."

"My liege will be all right. You'll see," Garcia said with a smile running her hand up and down Haley's arm. She saw Hotch's wife smile at her in return, thankful for the vote of confidence. Garcia motioned with her head down the hall. "C'mon with me, Haley," she added. "You look like you can use a little break from this place."

Haley seemed surprised by the gesture. "But…but…Penelope, don't you want to visit Aaron?"

"I do and I will. Later. I promise. Right now it looks like you need a break and can use a friend. So, let's go, missy." Garcia took Haley's hand and started to lead her away from the others. Haley looked back at the others before allowing herself to be led away.

"So what now?" asked Morgan looking at Rossi.

Rossi crossed his arms across his chest. "Derek, why don't you, Emily, and Reid decide which of you will visit Aaron when visiting hours are allowed again in two hours."

Reid rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Uh, Morgan…why don't you and Emily visit Hotch next? I'll uh…I'll wait until later."

Morgan looked at the young genius with concerned eyes. "Pretty boy, what's going on with you? Don't you want to sit with Hotch? I know you do. You've been chompin' at the bit to see 'im, and now you're backin' out? What's wrong, kid? Talk to me."

Reid avoided Morgan's eyes. "Nothing's wrong. It's just that…what I mean is…"

"Let me guess, kid…" Rossi interjected with hands stuffed in the pockets of his jeans. "You're blaming yourself for not figuring out it was Armitage sooner."

Reid chewed his lower lip and avoided Rossi's face. "That's not it at all, Rossi. It's just that right now I can't…what I mean is…that is I can't…."

Rossi nodded as he understood what the young agent was trying to say. He put a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, Reid. If you're not ready to see Hotch yet, you can wait until later. He'd understand. Just remember that we only have three more days here before we need to return to Quantico. And if Hotch needs more surgery in forty-eight hours, he might not be allowed visitors before we have to leave."

Reid fell with his back against the wall and hands stuffed in his pants pockets, looking down at the floor. He was sad at not seeing Hotch right now, but it was his guilt over not figuring things out sooner that manifested itself. What good is it being a genius if I wasn't able to figure out it was Armitage who held you hostage? I'm so, so sorry, Hotch. If I hadn't been so slow to figure it out, you wouldn't have been tortured. I'm to blame for you laying in that bed in a coma, maybe never being able to…it's my fault.

"I need to take a walk," Reid explained shakily. "I…I'll be back soon." Without waiting for a reply from any of the others, the young agent turned and walked down the hall.

"Reid," Morgan called out after him. "Hey, Reid." He started to follow but was stopped by Rossi who grabbed his arm.

"Let him be, Derek," Rossi said. "He'll be all right. He just needs to figure things out for himself. Trust me. He'll be back once he gets over his guilt over what happened."

In a move which shocked them all, Morgan turned on Rossi, anger in his eyes. "Just because you feel guilty doesn't mean everybody else is, Rossi."

"Morgan…" Prentiss began resting an arm on the agent's arm. "This is not helping matters."

Morgan turned his head towards her. "Don't tell me what isn't helping, Prentiss," he snapped. He stared at her. "Why are staring at me like that?"

"My God," Prentiss exclaimed. "You're feeling guilty over what happened to Hotch, aren't you?" Morgan didn't answer which told her she was right. "You're feeling guilty because you didn't go with him when he went to check on JJ."

"Is that true, Derek?" asked JJ now looking at Morgan's face.

Morgan looked at the blond, a pained expression now on his face. "As much as you because you couldn't stop Armitage from taking Hotch."

JJ turned away from her friends abruptly. "I don't feel guilty," she said in a low voice as tears threatened. "I don't."

"JJ?" Prentiss asked touching the blond's arm. The blond turned around and faced her friends, a small smile on her lips, tears building. "If I had taken the shot, I might have stopped Armitage from taking Hotch away. Or at least slowed him down enough until Morgan got there to stop him. It was my hesitation that led to him being where he is now."

"JJ…" Prentiss wrapped her arms around the blond and held her close. "It's not your fault. Your vision was blurred. You weren't able to take the shot without possibly hitting Hotch or somebody else. It's not your fault."

"And if you had gone with Hotch to check on JJ…" Rossi continued looking at Morgan. "…Armitage might have killed you and still taken Aaron."

"You don't know that, Rossi," Morgan said with tear-stained cheeks.

"Yeah, I do. Nothing was gonna stop Armitage that night. Nothing. If he had to kill both you and JJ to do it, that's what he would have done." He noticed Morgan still had doubts. "Derek, how do you think Hotch would have reacted if after he was rescued, he discovered you had been killed trying to stop Armitage?" Morgan didn't answer so Rossi continued. "I'll tell you. Angry. Angry at Armitage. And angry you threw your life away. He would never want one of us to throw their life away for him. He'd want this team to pull together and find a way to save him."

Morgan let out a deep breath knowing Rossi was right. He ran a hand over his bald head and stared into the eyes of the older man. "And what about you, Rossi? You're Hotch's best friend. How do you think he'd react knowing you blame yourself for not being able to keep him safe?"

Rossi rubbed the back of his neck. "Touché, Derek. Aaron would be pissed without a doubt." A sad smile crossed his face. "Looks like the only one without guilt is Emily. No harm intended, kiddo."

Emily smiled in return. "None taken. But even though Hotch sent me on an assignment before JJ was attacked, and he was kidnapped, doesn't make me guilt-free. I wasn't there when Hotch and JJ needed me to be there. I could have remained behind, and gone with Hotch when he went to check on JJ. Or gone with JJ when she had to make those phone calls so she wouldn't have been alone. I'll always regret that."

Morgan allowed himself to chuckle. "Looks like we all have a piece of the corner on guilt market. All except Garcia."

"All except Garcia what?" asked a voice from behind Rossi.

Morgan let out a deep breath seeing Garcia and Haley standing behind them. "Nothing, momma. We were just talking. Nothing you need to worry your pretty little head about, baby girl."

But Garcia wasn't buying it. "Oh no, you don't, my Chocolate thunder. I may not be a profiler, but don't think you can pull that lame excuse over on me." She jammed a finger into Morgan's chest while staring him directly in the face. "So spill, mister. Or I will hurt you."

"Penelope…" Morgan sighed wishing she would drop it.

"Out with it, mister. Or I will find the closest computer and send out those pictures I have hidden of you. And don't doubt I'll do it." Morgan winced.

JJ sighed. "We…we were all sharing in the guilt over what happened to Hotch." Garcia's jaw dropped. "We're sorry."

"I don't understand you people. My liege is laying in there fighting for his life right now. And all you guys can do is play the guilt game. All of you did the best you could. If you had known in advance it was Armitage, rest assured he would not have gotten within an inch of Hotch. You would have locked my liege in a closet with a guard dog in front of it to protect him. I understand that and so does Hotch. And so do all of you. So if all of you want to play the guilt trip, you play it with each other. And stay far away from mon Capitan because he needs only good vibes around him. If none of you can do that, then whoever needs to leave right now. Do you understand me?"

"Relax, kitten," Rossi said with a small smile.

"Don't tell me to relax, David Rossi. You of all people should understand better than anyone as you've known mon Capitan the longest. If Hotch found out, how do you think he'd react right now?" She saw Rossi about to open his mouth in response, and continued, ignoring him. "I'll tell you. My liege would be mad as hell. And besides that, he'd blame himself. Is that what all of you want?"

"You know we don't, baby girl. It's just…."

"It's just nothing, Derek. From where Haley and I are standing, it's either you do or you don't. Which is it?"

"You know we don't want Hotch to blame himself," admitted JJ.

Garcia's face remained impassive. "Then I suggest you all get over it quick-a-mundo. Comprende?"

The others exchanged understanding looks with each other. Rossi nodded and allowed a sad smile to appear. "Comprende, kitten."

"Good." Garcia looked around with a smile until she noticed there was someone missing. "Where is my junior G-man?"

"Reid uh…he went to take a walk to clear his head," Morgan explained. "He also bit off a piece of the guilt trip."

With a roll of her eyes, Garcia threw up her arms, animated. "You guys are contagious," she began. "Now you've infected my baby genius with your guilt trips." She made a shooing gesture with her hands. "Keep away from me and sugarplum here."

"Where you going, momma?"

"I'm going to find Reid." Garcia paused when a hand touched her arm. Looking at Haley, she found the woman smiling sadly at her. "You okay, sugarplum?"

"I'm fine," Haley said. "Penelope, you've helped so much already. Let me find and speak with Doctor Reid."

Penelope turned so she could face the other woman. "But you should be with your husband."

"I know. But don't forget, nobody can visit at least for another…" she checked her watch. "…ninety minutes, anyway. Let me find him and talk with him. This way you can decide which two of you will visit Aaron with me. Whichever two go, you both can visit for ten minutes each."

"Are you sure, Haley?" asked Garcia.

Haley nodded. "I mean, the team has to return to Quantico in three days. And Aaron might need surgery in another two. So each of you should visit with Aaron at least once even if only for ten minutes."

Haley had searched for only fifteen minutes before finding Spencer Reid sitting alone inside an empty hospital room in the ICU. As she studied the young genius through the glass window, he appeared lost in deep thought. With a sigh, she pushed open the door and entered the room. Reid was so deep in thought he never heard the door open, or anybody enter until a hand touched his shoulder causing him to jump. He looked up into Haley's face. She could see his eyes were moist.

"Are you all right?" she asked the young man.

"I'm fine. I just needed to be alone for a little while," Spencer explained crossing his arms over his chest. "Shouldn't you be with Hotch?"

Haley looked around, and spotted a chair near the bed. She picked it up and placed it in front of Reid and sat facing him. She smiled. "Nobody can visit right now. So, I decided to find you and talk. I'm worried about you, Spencer."

Reid swallowed the building lump in his throat. He looked at her. "Don't be. I'm fine."

"Are you?"

"Of course I am." Reid forced a small smile on his face. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"I heard you're feeling guilty, and I'm here to tell you there's no reason to be."

"I don't," Reid said softly now avoiding the woman's eyes.

"Spencer, it's obvious Aaron's entire team feels guilt over not stopping him from being kidnapped and tortured. Now I'm not a profiler, but I've been married to Aaron for twenty years, and I like to think I learned a few things from him. Also, I'm an expert when it comes to guilt." She smiled. "I do have a young child after all." She noticed the corners of Reid's mouth curl upward. "Spencer, let me ask you something. Why do you believe you're guilty?"

"Because I am guilty. I didn't figure things out in time, and Hotch got hurt because of it." Reid looked in Haley's face. His eyes were wet. She watched him wipe his face. "I'm suppose to be a genius and I didn't figure things out until it was too late. Hotch got hurt and may never be able…" He didn't finish his sentence.

Haley put a hand on Reid's arm. "No matter what happens, Spencer, it's not your fault. You all did what you could and found Aaron before this man killed him. Aaron always told me it's the Unsub's fault, not that of the good guys. Armitage chose to do this to Aaron. And if you and the others want to feel something, let it be relief in finding my husband alive, and catching the man who hurt him. I was told what would have happened to him if he hadn't been found in time."

Reid smiled. "We're suppose to be comforting you, not you comforting us."

Haley shrugged. "Turnabout's fair play. All of you have comforted me and Jack every time something happens to Aaron on the job." She got to her feet and held out her hand. "When visiting hours resume, you should be one of the ones to visit Aaron. He'd like that. Besides, you both need this."

Reid looked up at the blond woman, slowly took her hand, and got to his feet. He smiled sadly. "Thank you." They both started to leave the room when Reid suddenly stopped. "What about the others?"

"I wouldn't worry about them. Penelope straightened them out in a hurry."

Reid grimaced as he imagined exactly how Garcia had 'straightened out' his teammates. "That must have been painful," he added with a smirk as he held the door open for Haley.

The blond chuckled. "I have the distinct impression she has straightened out your teammates on more than one occasion." They both entered the hallway and started back where the others waited, Reid had both hands stuffed in the pockets of his trousers.

"Trust me when I say that she has, especially Morgan," he added.

"After seeing the way those two flirt with each other, I don't doubt it," Haley said with an amused grin. They soon rejoined the others.

"You all right, Pretty boy?" asked a worried Morgan.

"Yeah, I'm all right," Reid smiled slightly. "Have you guys decided which two of you are going to visit Hotch?"

"Not really," Rossi interjected. "We wanted to wait until you came back before deciding."

Reid noticed everybody was watching him now, waiting for his response to Rossi's statement. He chewed his lower lip.

"Pretty Boy?"

"Morgan, I've been thinking…" Reid glanced at Haley then back at Morgan. "And I've decided that I want to see Hotch as soon as visiting hours allow." He licked his lips. "I need to see him."