Chapter 26 - Friendship

Amy was both confused and concerned, first she got the frantic call from Sheldon, 'Penny has gone nuts', his exclamation to her as soon as she answered his call. Now as she talked to him, while she brought him home from work, he had told her he had taken the bus into work after his terrifying run in with Penny, surprising her as he explained in detail about how her Bestie had acted. So no sooner then they arrived in his apartment, she had tried calling Penny, knocked on her door, and even resorted to calling Bernadette, but she got the same thing from both girls, nothing. Amy had not seen the girls since that crazy Friday night and now all Amy could think of was 'What the hell was going on'.

Penny saw Amy's calls, but she couldn't talk to her, she didn't know what she would say to her friend and though it was cruel to ignore her friend, she thought it was better at this point to not talk to her. Also, she was still not feeling great about her husband being gone and she was worried about Bernadette, so she had enough on her plate right now and couldn't take anymore. Penny purposely took her time driving to Bernadette's, with everything on her mind, she found she had to concentrate more on her driving or she would zone out and probably run a light or stop sign. Therefore, it was almost 5 PM before she reached Howard and Bernadette's apartment, so when she saw Bernadette's car not there, she didn't think her friend would be their either and wasn't surprised when no one answered her repeated knocks on the door.

Penny now sat in her car and was really wondering if she could put up with Howard's mother long enough, to get the key to verify that Bernadette wasn't there, when it dawned on her, Bernadette's car was probably still on the street they left it on, Friday night. Bernadette had no transportation, so she had to be still here, where else could she be and that made Penny immediately worry. Penny looked again at the apartment and got back out of her car, knocking on Bernadette's door harder and longer, she was going to try a lot longer before she gave up again.

Bernadette had ignored the first knocking, but the second time, it sounded like the door was going to come down, this constant noise started to break through Bernadette's dazed state. She mindlessly pulled herself off the bed and padded to the door, not really thinking or caring what she was doing, she even opening the door without seeing who it was first. As she stood there staring, it took her a few minutes to even realize who was standing there, and she cried as her friend took her into her arms to comfort her.

Penny had been shocked to see the way Bernadette looked and the way she was acting, it was almost like she was in a trance. Penny saw someone who had gone through as much as she had and she knew exactly how Bernadette was feeling right now, so as much as for Bernadette as herself she took her into a hug. In the doorway, both girls just stood holding each other for several minutes, as tears fell from their faces, both finding some comfort with someone who understood the pain they each were feeling.

"Penny, I miss him so much."

"I know Sweetie, I can't get Leonard out of mind either."

"Why Penny, why did they have to take him?"

"I don't know, sniff, I don't know." Tears kept falling from Penny's eyes.

After a little while they let go of each other and went sit at Bernadette's kitchen table. Bernadette mindlessly made tea for them, without even thinking to ask Penny if she wanted some, just needing to do something. It wasn't long before they were sitting there with steaming cups before them both staring at each other, neither of them knowing what to say. The silence went on for a little while until Bernadette finally looked to her friend and spoke.

"I realized this weekend that I didn't know Howard like I thought, before I married him." Bernadette stared at he tea.

Penny looked at her friend, worried where she was going with this discussion. "Sweetie, what do you mean?"

"I thought I was marrying this sweet, skinny nerdy guy, who just made me happy. Not some guy who keeps risking his life and does some the wildest macho things I've ever seen. I went through that before in my life, wondering if my father, the cop, was going to come home each night, I thought Howard was different, I wouldn't have to worry about him, he would always be safe and home with me. But, he keeps leaving me and I don't know what danger he is in or if he will come back. Penny I can't take it." Tears appeared on Bernadette cheeks again.

Penny was now very concerned, "What are you saying, Sweetie. Are you saying you don't want to be with Howard anymore?"

"No….I love him too much, I couldn't live without him." Bernadette was getting more upset and started to cry again. "I just don't know what to do."

Penny reach over and patted Bernadette's hand, not knowing what really to say, finally deciding just to open up to her about Leonard. "Bernadette, I was more than a little surprised about Leonard too. I have know for a long time he loved me, and I guess I knew he would put his life on the line for me, but to actually see him do it, was…I don't know, sort of unbelievable." Penny stared at her cup for a minute. "I guess before I have always thought it would be awesome for some big handsome guy to rescue me from danger, but now, watching some one you love put his life on the line, just makes you want them to be safe and you worry about them and all….sniff….and it is so scary…sniff…..and you just want to hold him and be with him…sniff." Tears started to fall from Penny's eyes now too.

Bernadette turned her hand under Penny's and grabbed her hand, giving a squeeze. Both girls then gave each other a little smile, separated their hands, then took their napkins to dry their eyes. Neither of them now said much, just sat their sipping their tea, lost in their thoughts. Penny had finished her tea before she looked back up at Bernadette.

"I guess, I am a little hungry, since I haven't eaten since breakfast." She was desperately trying to get her mind and Bernadette's off their pain and on something else.

"I don't know, I'm not too hungry."

"Why don't we get something quick and then get your car."

"Oh, I actually forgot about the car." Bernadette shook her head. "I guess I'll need it to go back to work."

"Yeah, that will be fun, I'm really looking forward to working at that stupid restaurant again. Did they give you that phony doctor's letter too about how you been sick?"

Bernadette nodded. "Yeah, it says I had a bad 3-day flu and my temperature got so high, I had to spend the weekend in the hospital. How about you?"

Penny nodded, "Same."

"Okay, let's go before it gets dark. Can we pick up the car first?"

"Yeah sure, just let me just use your bathroom before we go." Penny smiled at Bernadette.

Bernadette thought she must look a mess too. "Yeah, that is probably a good idea for me, too."

-TIN MAN-

Leonard and Howard sat in the officer's club, eating with Major Martin, the food was actually good, but neither of them were terribly hungry. After a few minutes Leonard decided to ask Martin the question both him and Howard were wondering about. "How long are you going to guard us Major Martin?"

"You will be given a schedule tomorrow at 8 AM, after you are up and ready, then you will be less guarded by me. I'm really not guarding you, I'm just here to help you get settled and work with you on the program work you will doing here. Tomorrow you will find out more, I promise."

Leonard and Howard nodded, it was Howard that asked the next question. "We want to contact our wives. Will be able to do that?"

Martin nodded. "I have laptops for you both, so you can email them tonight. They are in your rooms. Phone calls probably tomorrow, I am getting you cell phones and hope to get those to you tomorrow too."

Leonard looked at Howard, "I think I am done eating and want to go to my room, how about you Howard?" Howard nodded.

"Okay, there are sweat suits, for tomorrow, in your rooms, I'll meet you in the lobby of the officers quarters at 0745, don't eat much because you will be physical training in the morning."

They both got back together as soon as they found the laptops in their rooms, Howard now logged into his email account and typing, his fingers making enough noise to drown out the noise of Leonard's typing in the chair across from him. Leonard was in Howard's room, both of them with the same thought on their minds, writing emails to their wives immediately. Howard was still feeling guilty for leaving Bernadette and after he told her about his day, he tried to write something to assure her he would change his ways, he didn't want her to worry about him leaving again. Unlike Leonard, he had not talked to her and that made him worried, he hoped Penny was with her now, and as he continued to type he prayed that everything was good with his wife.

Leonard was trying to keep everything normal for Penny, by just putting down everything that happened to him in as much detail as possible. He just wanted to make things seemed routine and safe, to make her not worry, the look on her face as he left her, still burnt into his brain. However after writing several pages, he had to tell her he missed her and he loved her, the whole page he wrote about that, seeming not enough for how he felt. But he didn't want to make her feel like he did right now, so he went back to rewrite it until it was only a quarter page long and not as intense. He then reread everything several times before he felt it wasn't scary for her and not too intense, before he was satisfied and hit send so it would go to her.

-TIN MAN-

Penny and Bernadette, first went to get Bernadette's car while it was still daylight, luckily it was still in the same location and not disturbed, even though it had sat there all weekend. As Bernadette walked up to it, she stopped before getting in it, to pull the parking ticket from under the windshield wiper, shaking her head, a humorless smile on her face, at the irony of it all. She thought about all the things that happened around the area they were now standing, a few days ago, and how everything was so back to normal now. It made her think about Howard, Leonard, Penny and all the good US soldiers that almost died there, and she shook her head again knowing if she let her mind dwell too long on what had happened she wouldn't be able continue doing what she now needed to do.

Penny and Bernadette then stopped to eat dinner together, both of them realizing that they were better being around each other, then not. There was a comforting feeling about being around someone who knew exactly the situation you were in and shared your pain. It was during dinner that Bernadette quickly asked Penny to stay with her, and Penny quickly agreed, Bernadette getting the words out before Penny could ask the same question. Penny tried to rationalize that it would be better for Sheldon if she wasn't around him, where she could hurt him if he upset her, but the truth was she needed not be alone. It made perfect sense to Penny, Bernadette and Penny had been friends for a long time, they wouldn't ask each other stupid questions or ask each other how they felt, because they both knew how the other felt, they both were suffering the same. They would be the perfect roommates till the boys came home, until their lifelong roommates returned to their arms.

They both stopped back at Penny's apartment, to quickly pack her clothes and her Laptop, then were back at Bernadette's apartment by 10 PM, Penny now sitting on Bernadette's couch with her laptop while Bernadette used the bathroom first, to take a shower. Bernadette's couch folded out into a bed and it would be Penny's home for the next couple weeks, she was amazed how comfortable she felt just being there on it now. Just hearing the background noise of Bernadette in the shower, made Penny not feel alone, though the thought of not sleeping with Leonard that night actually scared her. It was silly, and she knew it, but it would be the first night as husband and wife they weren't laying together, and somehow that thought made her fell terrible. As Penny sat there, her eyes feeling wet, she noticed her laptop, grabbed it and turned it on, thinking that maybe there was something there that could brighten her now rapidly growing sour mood.

The 'you have mail' beep immediately got her attention and Penny was so happy to find an email from Leonard, as soon as she logged on to her account. The tension seemed to drain from her and it made her feel happy and relaxed as she read about his day, a tear falling down her cheek, when she read his last paragraph on how he missed her. She smiled and kissed her finger, putting in against the screen over his email, then hit reply and started to write him back about her own day. She knew he would be happy she was staying with Bernadette, because he wouldn't have to worry as much about her being alone and she was happy he had Howard to hang with him too. She completed her email and hit send, just after Bernadette came out of the bathroom allowing her now to get ready for bed. It was a little while later that Penny ended up reading Leonard's email again, before going to sleep in the bed, the warm feeling of his words allowing her to fall asleep knowing he was okay.

Bernadette had completed her tenth reading of Howard's email, she had hung on every word, stopping every so often to just think about him. She adored her husband, even though they were sometimes snarky with each other, she loved him with all her heart and she knew without a doubt he felt the same about her. She kept stopping at the part of his missed call to her, and the pain of missing being able to talk to him, stirred resolve in her to do better. Penny being with her made her feel not so much alone and actually doing some things that evening had relaxed her, the routine making her feel some form of normalcy back in her life. Howard actually needed her to be strong, she could see it in his email, though he never said the words, and she loved him too much to not be that way for him. She just wanted him safe and in her arms again, the best way she saw to get that wish was to be as supportive of him, the best she could be, like she was before, when he went to space. A small smile formed on Bernadette's face as her fingers started to type on her keyboard, she had a lot to tell him, but before she started to tell her about her day, she wanted to tell him how much she loved him. She wanted him to know she would be here waiting for him and would always love him, she also asked him to stay safe, as she wrote from her heart in the most loving words she could think up. Bernadette wrote for over a hour, changing and correctly her email when she felt it wasn't loving or supporting enough for him and after she finished she felt better, a small happiness now inside her that she could be a comfort to him in a small way. She hit send and then let out a small sigh, she now felt a little better, she thought she could sleep, she laid her head down and was asleep only moments later, her last thoughts how wonderful it would be to be in her husbands arms again when he came home.