Disclaimer: …Yep, still own nothing.
The next morning, Jack smiled as he woke up. It really wasn't every day that one got to go to Hogwarts in a false reality. He decided, as he said hello to people, to make it as close to the book as possible… with a few exceptions. He had to stifle his giggles as Ron (The Doctor) mouthed to him, Still Ginger, with a look of excitement. He had made several new friends in his usual charming fashion by the time he got his schedule in the middle of breakfast. His eyebrows raised as he looked it over with The Doctor and Martha. "Aaaand, who's up for Transfiguration with Professor Kitty and the Slytherins?" he asked.
Martha nearly choked on her porridge. "Professor Kitty?"
Sure enough, when they went into the classroom, a cat with spectacled markings was sitting on the desk. Jack gasped with the others for believability when it turned into a stern-faced Professor McGonagall. "Transfiguration is some of the most complex and dangerous magic you will learn at Hogwarts. Anyone messing around in my class will leave and not come back. You have been warned." After she said this, Jack heard The Doctor mutter, "So how come she's a kitty then?" He had to disguise his laughing in a fit of coughing. After having fun watching The Doctor turn his match into a needle, then a match again, then something that looked vaguely like a letter opener and definitely wasn't found on Earth, then look expectantly at Jack, he gave up and laughed helplessly. By the time he recovered, he found his match and The Doctor's both simple matches and Professor McGonagall standing over their table, eyebrows raised. "What is so funny, Potter?" "I'm-I'm sorry, Professor, it's just so unbelievable," he said, trying for sheepish-overwhelmed. Sure enough, Professor McGonagall smiled benignly. "Please try to focus," she said and left. She loudly praised Martha's match, which had become all silvery and pointy. Jack kicked The Doctor. "You're supposed to be angry!" he hissed. "Well, I am now." he grumbled, rubbing his shin.
In Potions, Jack watched as Snape dramatically entered the room-His robes billowed like The Doctor's coat,he noticed with a grin-and bullied Jack, as well as making his overly dramatic speech about "Bottling fame and brewing glory", and Jack pretended to not listen and acted surprised when Snape barked his name. "Potter!" he said. "What would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?" He pretended to think for a few seconds before saying quietly and innocently, "Draught of Living Death, sir." Snape looked displeased and immediately asked, "Where would you look if I told you to find me a bezoar, Potter?" Jack replied, still in his 'innocent' voice, "It comes from a goat's stomach, sir." Snape looked thunderous. "What is the difference, Potter, between monkshood and wolfsbane?" Jack really pretended to think for a little while, then said eagerly, "There isn't any, sir, and isn't it also called aconite?" Snape actually looked slightly incredulous (as well as extremely angry) that Jack knew this. Jack really hoped he wouldn't ask any more questions, because those were the only ones from the book, and as such, were basically the only Potions-related things he knew. But he was in luck, because Snape's next question was, "What is one of the main ingredients in Polyjuice Potion, Potter?" He could feel The Doctor hiding his smile next to him as he said, "Boomslang skin, sir." At this point, Snape looked murderous for a few moments, then raised his eyebrows and said, "Very well then. I see you have at least minimal preparation. However, you will need far more if you are to be even adequate at Potions." He then paired them off to make a boil-curing potion, and Jack saw The Doctor inconspicuously prevent Neville from destroying Seamus's cauldron. Unfortunately, one time Snape saw him and told him off for "Helping another student cheat" and took 5 points off from Gryffindor. After the class, Jack turned to The Doctor. "He just wouldn't be able to function without some points off from Gryffindor, would he?" The Doctor winked. "Neville didn't need to put in 5 porcupine quills. Snape needs to bully poor young Gryffindors. Oh, and by the way? You're welcome for the mind shielding." "Thanks!" Jack said sarcastically.
A/N: Yep. Jack's trying not to flirt, and The Doctor is being The Doctor. Shoulda read the books, Snape.
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