I don't own anything but my own mind.
Yes, this is the Fourth Doctor. I have recently started watching the original Doctor Who, and have fallen in love with the awesomeness. :D Oh, and sorry if this sucks. I'm not quite certain what to do with this story, so I'm doing the best I can.
"Ooh, this is brilliant!" cried The Doctor. The portrait smiled. "Isn't it? I'm you, from what I gather, but the you that's supposed to be in this universe." The Doctor looked confused. "But this is fiction?" "My dear Doctor, you're fiction in one universe or another. We're all fiction, and we're all real." "But why were you headmaster?" The Doctor in the portrait sighed. "The Merpeople in the lake? Originally they were Saturnyns, I became headmaster when a ship fell into the lake, we had a talk, it was complicated… they live peacefully now, so long as they get jelly babies." "So is it just me, or do people actually listen a lot more in this universe?" The Doctor in the portrait snorted. "You haven't met the centaurs yet, then." Just then, the door creaked open. Headmaster Dumbledore walked in, and raised his eyebrows. "Harry, Ron, and Hermione. I am glad you came." The three friends composed themselves, and sat down when Dumbledore gestured for them to. "I must admit I am curious… how did you get in without the password?" "I asked nicely." replied The Doctor quietly, and Jack had to hide his grin behind his hand. Dumbledore leaned back in his chair. "I see…" He studied Jack for a while in silence. Then he frowned briefly, and studied Martha, who was starting to fidget. He then raised an eyebrow and looked at The Doctor. They were all quiet for a while as The Doctor and Dumbledore stared at each other for a while without blinking. Martha and Jack held their breath, and The Doctor in the portrait looked worried.
Suddenly Dumbledore stood up and whipped out his wand. "Ostendat formam!" he boomed. A silver light burst out of his wand and surrounded the three children…
Jack and Martha and The Doctor could feel themselves growing, their limbs stretching, their faces changing shape…
They were suddenly released by… whatever that light was. Martha looked at herself, and saw that she was herself again. She looked at The Doctor and Jack, and they were The Doctor and Jack. Jack then said what all three of them were thinking. "Crap." Dumbledore looked furious. "Who are you? What have you done with the children? Bartemus Crouch, why aren't you dead?"
The Doctor sighed. "First off, I'm not Barty, so lower your wand please. It's like a gun, and I don't like guns. No, really!" he added on seeing Dumbledore's face. "I'm not Crouch… Oh here, let me show you." He walked over to Dumbledore still with his hands up. Dumbledore backed up slightly, wand still raised. The Doctor sighed. "Look… I'm going to show you my memories now. The only reason I was hiding them from you before is because I didn't want something like this to happen. Cross my hearts, I won't hurt you. Just relax…" he put his fingers onto Dumbledore's temples.
Then The Doctor headbutted Headmaster Dumbledore. Martha, Jack, and all the portraits flinched. "…Couldn't you use Contact?" sighed The Doctor's portrait. "Only works on other Time Lords," groaned The Doctor as he rubbed his head. Dumbledore was doing much the same. Then he looked up. "You're a Time Lord." "Yep!" "From the planet Gallifrey!" "Yep!" "…My phoenix knows about you and never told me!" Fawkes whistled. Dumbledore sighed heavily, rubbing his temples. "…What will happen after you leave?" "Harry, Ron and Hermione will go back to their bodies and will think that they did all of these things." Martha risked a question. "Uh, Doctor? Why did you headbutt Dumbledore?" The Doctor smiled. "Sharing memories! I really should figure out a better way to do that… Anyways, you lot," he said, turning to the portraits, "Not a word. Got it?" The portraits hesitantly agreed, and The Doctor's portrait smiled. "Don't worry, I'll keep them in line." "Brilliant!" Just then, Jack sighed. "Doctor?" "Yes?" "We can't run around looking like ourselves!" The Doctor frowned. "…Right, that's a bit of a problem, isn't it? Hmmm… Well, I do believe we'll look like not-ourselves in about an hour… Not that I've had experience with this sort of thing, but bibliocriseses are generally fail-proof." Jack groaned. "You mean we're stuck in here for an hour? What if Professor Ba-Snape comes by, or McGonagall?" "Easy." Dumbledore now spoke up. He walked over to Martha, and tapped his wand on top of her head. She then proceeded to disappear. "Feels weird!" A disembodied voice squealed in Martha's tone of voice. "Hey! I'm invisible!" "Disillusionment charm!" The Doctor gasped. "Dumbledore, you're brilliant!" Dumbledore smiled, then proceeded to tap Jack, then The Doctor. "Cool, we're invisible." Jack giggled. "Right," Dumbledore said, looking serious. "You three will have to stay here, and stay quiet. Minerva may be coming around for tea in a little while; until the hour's over, just stay here. You may do your homework if you have any," he added. Something then proceeded to bump against a stool holding a delicate-looking instrument. Dumbledore winced. "Sorry!" The Doctor's voice called. "Blimey, being invisible really does a number on your coordination!" Martha and Jack giggled. "Only you, Doctor," sighed Martha. "Humph." "Would you please stay quiet? I, unfortunately, need to do paperwork. The Ministry expects me to perform miracles regarding the extracurricular budget, and I need to fill out charter forms." "Sorry," the three voices chorused. Dumbledore sighed, rubbing his temples. What a day, he thought. What a terribly confusing day.
I know, that could have gone better. BUT I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO WRITE DUMBLEDORE. *facedesks* Oh well. Please review!