Author's Note: Inspired by something a very close friend of mine said.
Levi almost dozed off because of this fat guy's boring speech about, if you have to go to the bathroom, you ride your horse back to the wall. Levi, was going to be giving a speech similar to that, but with different answers. Finally, the guy stopped talking and gestured to Levi. Erwin had his fingers crossed, hoping that the Captain wouldn't say anything stupid.
Levi got up as he took a deep breath. "What was the question?" he asked blinking because he was bored, and when he gets bored, he gets tired. Levi gets grumpy when he gets tired.
The man frowned. "When you have to-" the man was cut off by Hanji who was trying not to giggle.
"What do you do when you have to take a dump in the middle of the battlefield," the scientist answered trying hard not to laugh and look all professional.
"Yes," Levi started getting a mischievous look on his face. Oh. No. Erwin knew that look. This was not going to go by well. "So, if a Titan is chasing after you and you're in deep fear; with no horses. It is fight of flight. Right?"
Erwin face palmed, Hanji was trying not to pee her pants in laughter, Mike had to take a step outside to laugh, Dot Pixis choked on his boes, Nile just buried his head in his shoulders laughing, and Eren was falling over his chair and laughing. The man scowled. "But, what if you release something?" he asked as Levi raised an eyebrow.
"Then, you take off your pants and take a dump while running! We don't care what you show! Male or female," Levi answered as the man just was going to keep on protesting because he did not agree that it was 'safe'. (Since when is the Survey Corps ever safe?)
"What about decency?!" the man yelled pointing an accusing finger at Levi who narrowed his eyes and leaned up against the wall. This man didn't have a clue about what a Titan looked like.
"Decency is overrated," came the response. Levi didn't even think twice before saying it. He didn't care what the people thought of him. This was clearly, someone from Wall Sina.
"Yes, but, that Titan will catch up to them! And, no one wants to die with their pants off!" he protested folding his arms feeling like he won the argument. (According to him, it was an argument)
"No one really cares how they die. All we care about is making it out alive. Now, that is all I have to say," Levi stated coldly sitting back down. Erwin just got up and was lost in words