After a few months of drought, a cloudy day brought rain. The ground had begun to curl up, the once vibrant grass morphing into a dull mass. The graves of Lily Evans Potter and James Potter were well worn, representing the people that visited them daily. Within the wizarding world, they were a tragic, unknown story. No one would ever know the true story until their orphaned son became of the age to tell the stories held within him. Yet, the memories would be weeded out as he grew older, making it unlikely that the stories would ever be told. The true story of what happened that night was simply lost. No one knew where Harry Potter ended up and no witch or wizard dared look for him, fearing a fate worse than death. The true power of Dumbledore was no secret within the wizarding world and it was rumoured that Dumbledore came up with the living arrangements after Harry was orphaned.
The rain brought a depressed Severus Snape. The Potions Master had meant to visit the graves for quite awhile, but he couldn't stand the sunny days. There were many memories that would wash ashore, uncovering unwanted emotions. The day he had met Lily had been a flawless day, not a single cloud in the sky. He hated any reminders of how things used to be, fearing that they would make him feel emotions he had pushed away. He walked into the graveyard as the rain began to spit, astray droplets landing in randomly determined locations. The weather was perfect for his emotion.
With each step that the wizard took, the rain began to pour harder. Severus hadn't showered in a week. He didn't care if he showered. He didn't want to shower. The lack of showering was what kept him alive. The grease that built up in his hair reminded him of how Lily had wanted to be his friend as a kid. His childhood house didn't have warm water and in order to take a lukewarm bath, someone would have to boil bucketfuls of water, something that was quite tedious, leading to poor hygiene. Severus's father could afford all the cigarettes and whiskey that he wanted, but as soon as the essentials were needed, money ran tight.
After taking infinite steps, Snape finally reached the grave of Lily whose grave was next to James. There had been quite the childhood rivalry between himself and James. The Potter would never miss an opportunity to embarrass him. Feeling the unwanted emotions stir up, Severus kicked the dirt at James's grave and spat on it. He proceeded to Lily's grave.
Lily, I should have listened to you. My "friends" influenced my decision to join Voldemort and I regret it so much. I didn't realize all the pain that it would cause me and all the regrets it would give me. It hurts so much to know that I gave the prophecy to him. I begged him to spare your life, Lily. I begged him to spare your life. You should still be alive today. You never deserved death. If only the universe had twisted us into a separate fate. Snape thought, an unwanted tear trickling out of his obsidian eye.
The rain began to pour harder and harder and the tears multiplied. There was a clasp of thunder and Severus found himself gripping onto Lily's grave after falling onto his knees. He knew the tumble painful, but his emotional pain blocked out the physical pain. A voice was heard in his head and Snape looked up. "Snape, I know you'll never forgive yourself for what you did and I understand that. Though I may have never expressed it, I hated myself for how I let Peter, Sirius, Remus, and James bully you. I never was able to forgive myself. As a child, I had always thought that life treated all people equally, but when I met you, I knew that was not the case. You were always against all the odds. I knew your friends were dark and I wanted you to stop hanging out with them for one reason. I noticed the profound impacts that they had on you. I noticed how you slowly became darker and darker. That's what broke me. I tried to stop you from hanging out with them, but it was no use. When you called me a mudblood, I knew you had truly changed for the worse. Your dark childhood and poor choice in friends eventually changed you to a vengeful wizard. Believing you hated all muggleborns, I denied you. I wanted to accept your apology, but I couldn't. I forgive you, I know you caused my death, but you've been through so much. Please understand that I'll always love you." Lily seemed to say.
Severus felt relieved after this and knelt there on the grave, waiting for the rain to let up. Lily's death had taken a huge toll on his sanity and it had broken him to hold her body in his arms. The rain didn't let up, but Severus knew he had to move on. He would never forget the one he had lost. She would always be with him. Just knowing that she forgave him made everything feel slightly more resolved. And even as the seasons passed, and the rain came and went, Severus knew that Lily truly forgave him.
Words: 900
Team: Ballycastle Bats
Position: Seeker
Words: 900
House: Gryffindor
Category: Drabble
Prompt: A much needed shower