Here you go again! To the best Readers and Reviewers out there! Thank you for all your support.
The Fosters
When Lena and Mariana got home they found their whole family out in the back yard with a whole picnic lunch spread out in front of them.
"Welcome home loves" Stef greeted "Come join us just in time."
Lena kicked off her shoes and crawled onto the blanket next to her wife "This is nice."
"Brandon went to the store for me" Stef smiled "Got us all these lovely fun picnic fixings."
"And Oreos!" Jude cried "He got Oreos."
Lena reached across Stef to where Callie was lying next to her on her stomach editing some photos on her phone. "Hi Sweetheart" She smiled brightly "How are you feeling slug a bug?" She said poking her arm with a smile.
"Better than last night" Callie smiled
Stef patted Callie's bottom before just resting her hand on it while she talked to Lena "This one here, her fever broke around 8:30 this morning right after you left. I've kept her on Tylenol though and the last few times I've checked it's been at 99.9. So under a 100" She smiled "And with that came back her sassy pants. Sassing her mom around all morning."
Callie shook her head and rolled her eyes "I am not sassy! You are."
"I bet it's both of you" Lena shook her head as she crawled a little closer so she could lean across Stef to kiss Callie's forehead so she could feel with her own lips how her fever was going. She was happy to find the girl barley warm.
"I missed having you with us this morning, but I am so glad to see you feeling better."
"Mama want me to make you a sandwich?" Jesus offered as Mariana slid in next to him on the blanket.
"That'd be great buddy" She nodded
"Callie, phone please" Stef held out her hand "Get your plate dish up" She patted her daughters bottom again causing the girl to groan but she saved her picture she was working on and handed Stef her phone before sitting up to do what she was asked. That was a vast improvement since the day before. She really must have been feeling crumby and they hadn't even put it together. Lena made a mental note of that for in the future.
"So how did it go?"
Lena looked to Mariana who was dishing up her own plate piling it full of strawberries.
"It was better than we thought it was going to be. It would have honestly been nice to have Callie with us today. Next time though. Our next group one is scheduled for Friday and tomorrow morning I have one for Callie scheduled at nine."
Callie swallowed a bite of her chip as she looked at Lena "I have to go tomorrow?"
"She said I can go in with you, since you missed today. You won't be alone."
"What if I don't want to go" Callie challenged
"It's not really an option babe" Stef shook her head using her tone Callie knew not to challenge.
"I wasn't asking you" Callie said glancing at Stef "I was asking Lena."
"Whoa. No" Stef held up her finger at her daughter "Watch it Callie. You don't get to pit us against each other. Mama and I are on the same page when it comes to this. As I told you last night. We may know what's best for you when you don't know."
"Whatever" Callie mumbled as she picked up another chip but shot Lena a glare anyway.
Stef narrowed her eyes at Callie "Callie" She warned
"Callie! Stop it!" Jude snapped "This is supposed to be a fun lunch. Don't ruin it! You don't always have to have the last word!"
Callie looked at her brother bewildered for a moment before dropping her gaze onto her plate "I am sorry" She mumbled
"It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be" Mariana offered trying to defuse the situation as Jesus handed Lena a full plate.
"Thank you" She smiled as she took a deep breath "I got a call from the school board on our way home" Lena said looking to Stef. "I have to go in for a meeting this afternoon."
"What? No" Stef sighed "They can't give you more than a day?"
Lena sighed "Press and parents want to know things. They really wanted to meet yesterday but because of Callie they decided to give me a day off?"
"Because of Callie?" Jesus asked as he frowned "That's what they said?"
Lena nodded "Mmmhmm because my child was shot, they gave me a day off"
"Oh how kind of them" Brandon said sarcastically.
Callie crinkled her nose as her hand went to her arm wincing as she touched it "But you were shot too mama. We shared the bullet."
Lena gave a small smile Callie slipped in the mama title, the girl was getting more used to it and that made her heart soar. Then it made her shake her head with Callie's crazy emotions towards her one moment she was glaring at her the next calling her mama and then she realized her daughter said they shared a bullet and for some reason that was the craziest sentence she had ever heard and it was true. She wanted to laugh and she wanted to cry. She kept her eyes on her daughter. They truly had a bond now. They shared a bullet.
"Mama you okay?" Jude asked as he caught her zoning out.
"I am fine" She nodded "Just thinking" She then turned her attention back to Callie "You're right I was, they aren't making me go to all the meetings. Just a few of them. Since I am the vice principal."
"Lame" Callie mumbled as she turned back to lunch "I don't want you to go" She said quietly catching everyone by surprise.
"Cals, I won't be gone long" She promised "They told me it was only an hourish and mom will be home with you."
"Well I don't want you to go" She said again
"I have to Callie" Lena sighed loudly "It's my job."
Callie shrugged and turned away from Lena on the blanket and just picked at her lunch quietly.
"I have to go Stef" Lena looked to her wife who nodded hoping she'd understand when clearly the kids didn't. "I know love" She assured her "We'll be fine here. Don't worry"
"Callie's right" Jesus said after a moment "It is really lame they need you today. Why can't you be home with us for at least one more day? It's not fair."
"I don't want you to go either mom" Jude shook his head and Mariana nodded "Please don't go. Tell them you're sick. Or tell them Callie was in the hospital last night! She should have her mom with her."
"Her mom is with her and they know that" Lena shook her head "Guys, I have to go. But I'll tell you what. I am going to take my cell phone in and have it on me the entire time. You are free to text or call me at any point. Even if it's just to say Hi. Okay?"
Jude and Jesus nodded while Brandon reached out and patted Lena's arm "Mom, we're going to be fine. Don't worry. It's just different."
Mariana sighed "I guess, if you promise to come home right away."
"With Callie's fever under a hundred while you're out I think I am going to take the kids to the beach" Stef said out loud getting three cheers from the boys a raised eyebrow from Mariana and crossed arms over her chest from Callie. "Why don't you meet us there after?"
Lena nodded "I love that idea. The beach is a great get away."
She then looked at the kids "I'll have my phone on me I promise" She looked to Callie "I promise."
"I. Don't. Want. You. To. Go" Callie said standing up tossing her mostly empty food plate into the trash can they brought out by the blankets before she went inside the door slamming behind her.
Stef held up her hand "Honey, don't let her get to you. We will be fine."
Lena chewed her lip "She doesn't request much from me. She never asks for anything. Leaving her when she is very dead set on me staying. Leaving her is going to be hard."
Stef glanced at Mariana "Remember the first time we left Mariana at daycare? During the summer when you had to do summer school? You remember the tears? You also remember how she was alright? She even had fun? She was fine. Callie will be fine honey. Jude's here and I am here."
Lena went to protest but nodded "Just remember I have my phone on."
"We know sweetheart" Stef said gripping Lena's hand. "We'll be okay. All of us. This is just a small step."
Lena took a few more bites of her lunch before standing up "I have to go get ready. Thanks for lunch" She said quietly as she headed into the house.
"Guys keep eating" Stef smiled to the kids "Or if you are finished start packing beach baskets, towels, toys, sunblock, tubes, snacks! Lots of snacks"
She then headed inside after her wife quickly. Didn't take her long to find Lena pouring coffee into a travel mug in the kitchen.
"Hey love"
Lena sighed "Hi sweetheart."
"Lena, Callie's going to be okay."
"I know" She nodded "I know she's safe in your care. The truth is I am having just as much separation anxiety from her and the rest of the kids as they are from me. I just have to be the adult. I have to do my job. I have an obligation." Her lip began to quiver and Stef was there quickly wrapping her arms around Lena pulling her in to a tight hug "The death total is at fifteen now. Ten children five adults and several in critical condition. My children are all here. All alive and breathing and I am freaking out about leaving them? How pathetic am I?"
Stef shook her head "Not pathetic at all! Lena Elizabeth not at all! Your children and you were put in a very dangerous situation the other day. You and Callie were shot at it! Thankfully it was just a graze but my love that is traumatic! I would be worried if you were happy to leave the kids. I would be worried if the kids didn't have a little bit of separation anxiety from you too."
"Ten children dead" Lena sobbed "And because the kid wanted to kill me. Why? Why did he want to hurt me? I wasn't mean to him. I was compassionate even when I suspended him. I let him know it wasn't personal but just the rules. Why did he turn on me?"
"I don't know" Stef said honesty as she tried to wipe tears away. "He was angry. His life was unstable. It wasn't really about you. It wasn't personal."
"The bullet graze in my daughter's arm makes it feel personal! He targeted my kids! That's personal."
Stef sighed "It was a statement."
"Statement made loud and clear" She shook her head "As ten kids are dead, and five sets of other families lost a parent." Lena took a calming breath "How did I miss he was so angry" She chewed her lip "Mari asked today if Callie was that angry" She whispered in case Callie was around. "It scared me" She said honestly "No I don't think our daughter would ever do this, but she's angry enough to hurt herself in big ways."
Stef chewed on her lip "Yeah, I guess she could, but she has us watching her. Loving on her. We are here. Look at Andrew's home life. He had nothing stable. She has us now. Believe it or not babe she feels safe with us."
Lena pinched the bridge of her nose as she tried to calm herself down "I know, I see that, but my mind right now is working on seeing the worst. I can't lose my kids. Stef I can't lose my kids. I am not strong enough to lose them."
"Oh baby" Stef shook her head as she held close and rocked her "We aren't going to lose our kids."
"We could" Lena cried into Stef's shoulder "Ten kids just died in a blink of an eye. It's so real. It's all I can think about. It could have been one or all of ours!"
Stef just kept a hold on her no longer having the words to try and comfort her. There was always a chance something could happen. She didn't want to promise her it wouldn't happen. She just didn't want her to swell on it.
Lena finally pulled away and wiped her eyes "I am fine. I just need to go before I am late. I'll meet you at the beach."
Stef grabbed Lena's hand "If you're really not up for this, don't go."
"I am fine Stef" Lena said again "I need to help my coworkers deal with this."
"Alright" She agreed "But just remember before you're a Vice Principal you're a mom."
"That's why I am going' She nodded "I am a mom, I know how sensitive this is" She leaned forward and kissed Stef's cheek. "Remind the kids I have my phone with me. They can text me all they want."
Stef nodded "If they struggle I will remind them of this."
"Should I go say goodbye to Callie? Or will that make it harder on her?" Lena asked picking up her keys.
"I don't know love. Follow your gut? I can't tell if she needs space or if she needs a reminder of how loved she is." Stef sighed "But, I'll have her with me all afternoon. Planted next to me on a beach towel resting. So she'll be okay."
Lena grabbed her purse and her mug "Alright. I'll meet you at the Beach."
"Bye my love" Stef whispered as she watched Lena head for the door.
"LENA WAIT" Callie yelled running down the stairs as she ran towards Lena her eyes wide.
Lena put her things down quickly on the ground just in time to stop Callie from crashing into her.
"Whoa, Callie Honey"
"Don't go." Callie grabbed onto her arm and held on tightly. So tightly she could feel her shaking and her nails were digging into to her arm. She winced slightly trying to get her to loosen her grip. "Honey, that hurts"
Stef was now behind Callie and had wrapped the girl into her arms from behind "Let go of mama" She said kindly but obviously with command in her tone.
Callie loosened her grip a little "Don't go. Please Lena."
"It's just an hour Cal" Lena tried to free her arm while Stef held onto to Callie holding her tightly against her. "Callie, I am here."
"No, it's not the same" Callie's eyes filled with tears "Please mama. Please don't go." Tears began to fall "Mama!"
Callie's legs went weak as a sob took over her body and if it weren't for Stef they would have crashed to the floor but she managed to pull Lena down too as she refused to let go of Lena's arm.
"Honey" Stef rocked her slightly "Baby girl, you have to let go of mama's arm."
"No" Callie cried "No, she can't go! She can't leave me! Please she can't go."
Callie was now shaking in Stef's arm as sobs took over her body "Don't' go."
"Let go of her" Lena said to Stef who let go immediately and Lena pulled her into her own arms and rocked her on the floor.
"I won't leave you" Lena promised "I am going to stay right here with you Callie. I am staying. It's okay. I won't go."
Callie sucked in some air as she held onto Lena her body shaking "I'll hug you" She said softly "I'll hug you mom. I'll kiss you. I'll be a good girl."
Stef closed her eyes all of a sudden as it clicked. Callie was terrified that if Lena her in that moment that she wasn't going to come back. She'd come close to losing Lena the day before and now she was convinced that something terrible was going to happen and she'd loose another mother.
Lena looked over Callie's head to Stef "I can't leave her this upset. I'll have to tell them I can't come."
"You have the right" Stef said softly getting Lena's phone "This is your child and she comes first. They can't fire you over it. Really Lena it's fine. She was in the hospital two nights in a row. If she needs her mama she needs her mama."
Lena nodded as she held Callie against her rocking her. She didn't know how to fix this. She didn't know how to make her children be less afraid. She didn't know how to make herself be less afraid. So she just held her daughter rocking her in her arms promising her she wasn't going to go.
The Fosters
FB
Callie woke up wanting her mom. She'd never not hugged her goodbye before and now she was in a desperate need of a mommy snuggle. She was still mad about the sleep over but she wanted her mommy.
She entered the kitchen expecting to find her mom and Jude making pancakes but instead she found Gracie her mom's best friend rocking Jude on her lap her eyes red and puffy.
"Gracie, what are you doing here?" Callie asked "Where did Brittany go?" She asked referring to the babysitter.
"She went home really late sweetheart" Gracie cleared her throat "Her mom came and got her after it got late. I came though."
Callie frowned "Why? Where's Mommy and Daddy?"
Gracie's heart sank as more tears filled her eyes. "Sweetheart, we have to talk."
Callie shook her head "No, no we don't. Just tell me where Mommy is"
Her stomach was filled with bad feelings. She didn't like the way Gracie looked.
"Baby girl, last night your mommy and daddy were in an accident. Your mommy didn't.. She.. Baby she went to be with the angels. Your mommy she died."
Callie stopped breathing. She knew what died meant. Her cat Jinx had been hit by a car and died a few months ago. "No" She shook her head "No you're lying Gracie! That's a mean Nasty thing to say! Give me my Mommy!"
Gracie put Jude down and went for Callie who smacked her away "No! Go AWAY! I HATE YOU! MOMMY!" She ran from the room hearing Jude crying behind her. She ran to her parent's room expecting to find them but instead finding their bed exactly how her mother left the night before with her night gown laid out ready for her to change into when she got home.
She grabbed the gown and threw it to the ground before she slid down next to it in defeat. Thinking back to when her mom tried to get her to talk, tried to get her to kiss her goodbye and she refused. She'd been nasty to her mom and now her mom was gone. All because she had been a bad girl.