In a way, he couldn't believe that he didn't kiss Shelly. A good, long, lingering hug and a longing look was the best that he could muster as a way of letting her know that he wasn't saying 'no', just 'not right now'. His head was messed up. Sure, they'd been attracted to each other back in high school and, apparently, there was something still going on from Shelly's end of things. And he didn't know if there was from his.

He was human, after all, and she was…well, she was all woman. There was no doubt. And it wasn't hard for him to envision a world where he would have just grabbed her tonight out of some passionate sense of desperation. It would have seemed like some kind of small town cliché. He worked for her mother, at the end of the day. Technically, he even worked for her. She was running the store's Christmas events.

It felt like his nerves were shot. It was a struggle to keep his hands steady on the steering wheel and, with the way the snow was starting to come down, it wasn't the best time for that. As he headed down the main drag back toward his old neighbourhood, he saw a familiar El Camino tucked into the parking lot of a country bar, right under the neon Old Milwaukee sign.

Eric pulled into the parking lot next to the El Camino and threw the car into park. The bar was about halfway home. Not too far from his dad's old auto plant. It was a typical kind of dive country place. Some sawdust on the floor, a slightly crooked and unvarnished bar marked with some old neon beer signs. Leaning over it, his elbows up on the bar and his head hung down was Steven Hyde. The fro almost completely held the Budweiser on the bar from view.

"Hey, man." Eric took the barstool next to his best friend and put a hand on his shoulder. "What number is that?"

Hyde pulled back and stared at the beer bottle for a second. He blinked like he was trying to gather his surroundings. "I think it's four." He mumbled. "I haven't been here very long, I don't think. There was just so much crying and then there was so much yelling, man. It was a long day."

For a second there, on the drive home, Eric almost regretted not going to the funeral. He regretted not sitting there with his parents who had known Randy. He regretted not being there for Hyde and Jackie and Fez. Hell, a part of him even regretted not being there for Donna. After being shouted at a couple days ago, after being accused of contributing to Randy's death, he still felt like trying to take care of the gang. "Dude, I know I've said it before, but I'm so sorry."

"It wasn't just booze." Hyde admitted out loud. The first time he'd said it anyone. "They always think that you can't see the tracks, man. I just didn't know what the hell to do. I figured he'd hit a wall, flame out and just readjust."

That was typical Hyde. The same guy who once said that he couldn't rat Kelso out for cheating but he could try like hell to get him caught. It was the same guy who fearlessly ranted about Big Brother and tried to convince everyone that if they could just do what they wanted, they'd be alright. "Did he ever ask for help or anything?"

"Nah, man." Hyde downed the last sip of beer and flagged down the bartender for two this time. "I mean, it was obvious something was up but he never seemed like he was more than a bad hangover or one hard morning of coming down away from being fine."

"Hyde, man, listen if there's anything I can do…" Before he could finish the sentence, Hyde cut him off.

"You want to help, Forman?" He slid the other Budweiser down the bar. "Drink." The two of them sat there in silence staring down at the bar. For the first time in a long time it felt like there was something between them that they couldn't really talk about. Hyde and Randy had been friends. Donna and Randy had been more than that and now there was this big gap between the two of them that Eric was starting to think couldn't be bridged.

The little portable transistor radio behind the bar was belting out the country station that you sometimes got over the air from Sheboygan. Even for a Monday night at the beginning of December, the bar was surprisingly empty. There were a couple old drunks over in one corner, a couple truckers playing darts back near the entrance to the men's room.

His mind wandered back to work. Nothing about being back home felt like the place that he left. Sure, Red and Kitty hadn't really changed. But Donna seemed to be so angry with him all the time now. He rarely saw Fez any more. Even Hyde, there was something hanging around there. Yeah, if you spent a while apart, things were going to change. But he'd been gone months, not years.

But, then there was Jackie. Since he'd been back she'd been different but in a good way. The only one of his friends you could really say that about. He wondered if he was compensating. All those moments that he'd enjoyed with Donna, the non-sexual ones were the one he actually remembered the most. Like the nights the two of them spent lying on the hood of the Vista Cruiser. He was having those moments with Jackie now. Standing by the sink after Thanksgiving Dinner or all those times they'd shared a laugh while she glued his beard to his chin.

He looked over to find Hyde staring down into the bottom of another empty beer bottle. That one had gone down just a little too quickly. Judging by the smell of his friend's breath, it was closer to eight or nine beers than it was to five. And he understood. There were days where trying to be that unmovable rock for people just got exhausting. Father Carelli, in that little African village had once told him the story of the Hurricane and Rock. For people who lived in the hurricane, the Father had once told him, the rock looks mighty inviting once in a while. Your perspective on the rock would be quite different. But, the Father liked to remind him that the only lasting things in the world used rocks as their foundation.

The bartender slid another round of beers in their direction and, after setting his on a coaster, Eric got up and headed for the pay phone down the hallway near the restrooms. He was stopping after two, but he needed someone to get here and take Hyde and the El Camino home. It had to be someone Hyde would listen to and right now, there was probably only one of those.

He slid in next to Ma Bell's outpost at the back of the bar and dialled the number for his house. "Forman Residence". His mother's voice rang through the phone. Shouldn't have shocked him. He couldn't imagine that his mother slept well with him out of the house. At least that's what she told him when he was in Africa.

"Mom, it's me." Such a simple sentence, but capable of conveying a lot. "I ran into Hyde at a bar on my way home and…well, I'm going to need help getting him and the Camino home."

"You know, your father's not going to like having to get him at a bar." Kitty's voice had a little warning but not enough to scare Eric off.

"Mom, he won't listen to anyone else." Eric answered. It was true. Eric had seen Hyde look rough before but he didn't even look this bad when his mom left. You always heard stories about kids who died in high school. Hell, that was like half of rock music that came out of the early sixties.

"Alright, I'll talk to your father." Kitty was resigned. Eric knew that deep down, his mother was just happy that he'd called her in a moment like this rather than try to figure it out on his own. She hung up the phone and Eric headed back to the bar. It wasn't like he wanted to drag Red out here. He knew he'd here about it, too.

When he sidled up next to Hyde again, his friend looked out from under his sunglasses at him. "Took you awhile." Hyde almost clinked the beer bottle off his teeth. "Who'd you call to come get us?"

"My folks." Eric wrapped his hand around the beer. "How'd you know?"

"Dude, I can see the payphone from here." Hyde pointed over toward the restrooms. "But even if I couldn't, that's always been you. You've always been looking out for us, man. That's why it's weird that you weren't there today."

"I just couldn't do it, man." Eric shook his head. "It's not like I thought he deserved it or anything, but I just couldn't bring myself to care. It's like I blame him for coming home and having everything be different, you know?"

"You're different, too, man." Hyde nodded slowly as he picked at the label on the bottle. "The old Forman would have gone running back to Donna the second she showed any interest. But you stood your ground. I kind of respect it."

"You do?" Eric almost fell off his stool.

"Yeah, man." Hyde let out a belch. "Watched you stand up to Red, Cops, even us. But always figured the foxy redhead next door would be your kryptonite." Eric put his hand on Hyde's shoulder and gave him a little jostle. "So, you gonna go outside and wait for Red so we can accurately judge how pissed he is before we've got to deal with him?"

"It's snowing out there, man." Eric pointed over his shoulder with his thumb.

"Better snowflakes out there than Red raining his feet on our asses inside the bar." Hyde shot back quick enough to make Eric laugh.

"Alright, good point." Eric pushed out from the bar, spun and headed for the door. The wind had picked up and was starting to push the snow across the parking lot. Welcome to December in Wisconsin, he thought. He blew into his hands to keep them warm as he waited for the sight of the Toyota. He really wasn't sure what to expect from Red when he got there. Honestly, his worries were the exact same as Hyde's. A thunderous chorus of feet indiscriminately raining down on people's asses.

The car pulled into the parking lot down off the main drag and Kitty stopped it almost right at Eric's feet. Red didn't look pleased, but Eric had definitely seen his father look angrier. Eric swung around to his mother's side of the car and peaked in the window. "Hey, thanks for coming."

"Well, we just got done burying one drunken dumbass." Red climbed out of the car and stood facing his son across the roof. "Your mother actually cares about Steven. What did you think was going to happen?"

"Your father is trying to say that he cares about you kids and this is what good parents do." Kitty gave Eric a loving tap on his hands.

"No, I'm not." Red corrected his wife. "I'm saying we just got done burying one drunken dumbass and I hate going to funerals." Eric couldn't tell if Red was busting his chops or if he actually meant it. There was always a part of him that thought there was a little bit about Red that might be an act. But he never wanted to tempt fate when he was actually face to face with Red. "Let's get in there. Kitty, I'll see you at home."

The Toyota pulled back out of the parking spot and headed for the exit to the parking lot. Eric and Red stood there for a second. The grim set jaw of Red Forman was unmoved as he stared his son down. "How many have you had?"

"One and change." Eric answered.

"How long have you been here?" Red's hands were folded in front of him.

"Little more than an hour." Eric shrugged and they slowly headed toward the door. "I'm not drunk."

"I know." Red stopped in front of the door. "But you're also a hundred and twenty pounds. So, two more beers and you will be."

"So…should I finish this one?" Eric tilted his head at the question.

"Of course." Red looked confused by the questions. "You don't leave a mostly full beer on a bar." Red pushed the door open and the two of them walked in. Hyde was still parked at the bar, working on peeling the label off his beer bottle and taking a little time to make sure Eric's went untouched. "Figured this was a good place to retreat, did you?" Red walked up behind his surrogate son.

"Figured it was the last place anyone would think to look for me." Hyde polished off another bottle.

"You figured that the best way to remember your friend who died of alcohol poisoning was to go to a bar and drink alone?" Red took a seat between Eric and Steven.

"I was doing pretty well until he showed up." Hyde pointed down the bar at Eric.

"Listen, I know what you're going through." Red flagged the bartender down. "Old Milwaukee. Draft. When I was your age, I tried pickling myself a few times because of the friends that I lost on Guadalcanal and Guam. At the end of the day, you're here and they're not. Drinking isn't going to change that."

The two of them nodded. "That's true." Hyde stuck out his lower lip. "Still sucks."

"Yeah, it does." The pint of Old Milwaukee slid down the bar and stopped in front of Red. "But you ever worry Kitty like this ever again…"

"Foot in the ass?" Hyde guessed with a goofy smile.

"So far you'll think you have a second heartbeat." Red tossed him a sarcastic grin and threw back a swig of beer.

"On that note, I think I'm going to break the seal." Hyde tapped the bar with both palms and headed for the bathroom. After he got out of earshot, Red turned to face Eric.

"Now, what's wrong with you?" Red grunted as he turned around on his stool. "You've been quiet, you don't have a smart mouth and you're not twitching. Are you sick?"

"No. I just have a lot on my mind." Eric answered as the radio behind the bar began to play Johnny Cash and Waylon Jennings.

I met an old friend this morning
And I stopped him and called him by name
I said, "The years haven't changed you
But he said, "Good Lord, how you've changed!"

"Does this have anything to do with the Wessler girl?" Red gulped down another drink.

"Wait, you know about that?" Once again, Eric almost fell off his barstool.

"Your mother is in that LOPP group with her mother Trudie." Red answered. "We found about that job shortly after you got it."

"Wow." Eric settled back down. "I thought you'd bust me if you found out I was Santa Claus."

"I almost did." Red laughed. "But then I figured, you're working. And, if you're Santa Claus, then no one is going to ask me to do it for a weekend."

Eric laughed a little. "So, you don't care?"

"No." Red was half done his beer. "So, what's going on with the Wessler girl?"

"She, um, she came on to me after work tonight." Eric made a concerted effort to avoid Red's gaze.

Then we stopped in at a tavern
We had us a round or two
We called ourselves old desperado's, old desperado's
As old friends are likely to do

"Well, you're not seeing Donna anymore." The elder Forman enthused. "What are you doing here?"

"Dad, I'm just…" Eric stopped and took a breath. "It all seems like I came back to a totally different place. Donna's pissed at me all the time, Jackie's nice to me all the time. Hyde's…"

"Listen, you can complain or you can do something about it." Red dug his elbows into the bar. "If Donna's angry with you, don't see Donna. But grow up. Don't sulk. So, you're not going to marry your high school sweetheart. Most of us don't."

"It's not that." Eric shook his head. "I should have wanted to kiss her tonight. I did want to kiss her tonight, I just…I couldn't."

"That's a pretty girl." Red nodded his head. "You could definitely do worse."

"You don't have to tell me that." Eric was getting more and more frustrated. "I just, I want to know why I froze up tonight."

"Yeah, well, I can't help with that, son." Red gave Eric a pat on the shoulder. Hyde strode back over to his seat at the bar.

We sat for a while and remembered
Then he said, "Let's have just one more"
I said, "I'd sure like to join you
But best be goin' on home"

"Alright, Steven, give Eric your keys." Red stuck his hand out and, without protest, Hyde handed the keys over. "Alright, Eric, you're taking Steven home. I'll take the Cruiser. Go straight home. I'm not coming back out tonight. It's freezing out there"

Red was the first out of the bar. Eric and Hyde were sort of dragging behind him. "Hey Forman?"

"Yeah." Eric nodded.

"Don't tell anybody or anything." Hyde stopped the two of them before they stepped out into the parking lot. "Glad you pulled over and stopped in, man."

"Yeah." Eric let the word hang. "For what it's worth, man. I'm sorry."

"Yeah." Steven nodded. The two of them walked out of the bar.