Though Hyde would never admit it, he actually like Christmas. It was the one time of year that he actually got to pay back the Formans for all they did for him all year. And while he might never be able to get Red a Corvette or a Fire Chicken or a GTO, he could do what he could to get Red a gift that the old man would appreciate. He had poked around in the hardware section of the department store until he came across a new power saw. He figured he'd head over to housewares and see if he could find something that Mrs. Forman really wanted.

"Have you talked to Donna since the two of you did the horizontal mambo on Saturday?" Fez had come to the mall with him.

"From what I can remember of that night, I was the only one who was horizontal, man." Hyde let out a slight chuckle as he poked through the housewares section. He started looked knife sets, crock pots and anything he thought Mrs. Forman might like for Christmas. "Yeah, I don't know how I'm gonna be able to talk to Donna. Every time I think about her now I just see her naked."

"That's a bad thing?" Fez looked instantly confused.

"Nah, man." Hyde stood back up straight. "It is damn confusing though."

"Oh, poor baby, every time you close your eyes you see a naked, gorgeous redhead." Fez was trying to look uninterested in the fact that they were merely across the aisle from the women's underwear section of the store. There was a little part of him that had remembered on the drive over that this was the store that Jackie worked at. He debated trying to to get Hyde to go somewhere else but he didn't want to raise his friend's suspicions.

He figured as long as he kept them away from Santa's Village, he'd keep Hyde away from Jackie. Over the last few weeks, he'd noticed his roommate getting quieter but tougher. She retreated a little more but she was getting more decisive. Still, he couldn't think of anyone that she would less want to see while wearing an elf costume than Hyde.

Eric was supposed to be around here somewhere. Back when he'd had the conversation with Jackie about what feelings that she was or wasn't having for Eric, Jackie had mentioned that the two of them were both working here but she didn't say where Eric was working. Fez figured with his experience in the stock room at Price Mart, they had probably just stuck him in the back somewhere.

"Fez, man, which do you think Mrs. Forman would prefer? A new crock pot or a food processor?" Hyde pointed at the two kitchen appliances sitting on the shelf near each other.

"Does Mrs. Forman need a new crock pot?" Fez put his hands on his hips.

"Not really, I almost never see her use the one they have now." Hyde stepped forward and grabbed the box off the shelf. "Alright, Christmas shopping almost done. Glad I don't have to buy for Jackie this year. I was always trying to make that compromise work between getting her something expensive enough that she wouldn't complain but cheap enough that I wouldn't be broke until Valentine's Day."

"I hear that." Fez let out a nervous chuckle.

"How?" One of Hyde's eyebrows shot over the top of his glasses. "When was the last time you had the same girlfriend at Christmas and Valentine's Day?"

"In this country?" Fez idly tapped his chin as the two of them walked to the checkout counter. He watched as Hyde stood there trying to flirt with the checkout girl as she rang through the power saw and that food processor that he had bought for the Formans.

"Hey, so I'm not very good at the whole wrapping paper thing. Can you help me out?" He tried smiling at the blonde behind the counter but she wasn't buying it.

"Over near Santa's Workshop is our gift wrapping station." She snapped her bubble-gum. "You can take it there."

At the words "Santa's Workshop", Fez's ears perked up. He instantly tried thinking of how we could protect Jackie. "It's exam season, the senior girls from high school will be at the Hub all afternoon."

"I have to get these wrapped." Hyde tapped on the boxes. "If I don't do it now, I'll either forget and have to stand in line closer to Christmas or one of the Formans will end up stumbling across the box and it'll spoil the surprise."

"But do we really have to wrap it here?" Fez laughed nervously. "Maybe the gift wrapping girls in the mall are hotter?" He figured this was his best shot. After all, the way Hyde had been talking all day it was like he was looking for any excuse to think about a naked woman who wasn't Donna.

"What is with you today?" Hyde's voice got a little louder and a little more irritated. "Besides, man, they always hire like these reject former Cheerleaders to work as Elves in Santa's Workshop and if you're willing to stand there in tights all day, I'm betting your standards are pretty low."

"Or not." Fez replied quickly.

"Won't know until we try." Hyde got in line at the gift wrapping counter. Of course, the other reason for getting the gifts wrapped here is that the store wrapped their own merchandise for free. The Mall charged you for it. He waited in line looking around to try and find the Elves that were working in the Workshop this year. What he liked about the mall at this time of the year was that it usually stayed open just a little longer than the record store. It was the only way he was ever going to get any Christmas shopping in.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw long flowing black hair and a par if candy cane striped tights that seemed to be clinging to this one elf just perfectly. "Attention, customers. The store will be closing in fifteen minutes." Came over the PA and some salesperson roped off the gift wrapping line behind Hyde and Fez.

"Hey, man, check out the elf at nine o'clock." Hyde tapped Fez on the shoulder and pointed to the dark haired elf manning the camera pointed at Santa Claus. "They must be making hotter cheerleader rejects than they used to."

"I think that Mrs. Clause might be younger than she looks." One look at the dark haired elf that Hyde was fixed on and he knew it was Jackie. Actually, he was surprised that Hyde didn't make the connection. He figured that Hyde had probably memorized more of Jackie's body than anyone else. Of course, Fez knew that Shelly Wessler was playing Mrs. Clause. Anything to try and get Hyde out of the story with raising Jackie's attention.

They got to the front of the gift wrapping line faster than Fez thought they would and with only two boxes to wrap, he figured that they might actually get a couple minutes in the store before they had to be out at closing time. With the boxes wrapped, Fez figured he'd take one last shot at trying to get Hyde out of there. "Come on, Hyde, let's go home." Fez whined. "We are going to miss WKRP."

"What's with you? You've been trying to get out of here since before we got here, man." Hyde would have thrown his hands up in the air if they weren't holding shopping bags. His voice was just loud enough to turn a few heads, including hers. The gasp that Jackie let out when she turned, was just enough to tip off Hyde that she was here. "Jackie!" He spun and came face to face with.

"Steven!" She shrieked.

"The mall is closing now." The voice over the public address system rang through the store.

"Did you tell him I was here?" Jackie turned her accusing glare at Fez.

"You knew?" Hyde growled, turning on Fez as well.

"Ai…" Fez started to nervously twitch. "We, uh, we have to go." He turned and sprinted for the exit to the parking lot. Hyde thought for a second and then decided that he was going to be kicked out of the store anyway. Besides, he could burn her in the parking lot in a few minutes anyway.

"Fez, you knew that Jackie was an elf in Santa's Workshop and you didn't tell anyone?" Hyde caught up to Fez out in the parking lot. "Do you realize how many burn opportunities you robbed your friends of? That's a major violation of the code, man."

"I…I…I didn't know the while time and then I just…aiiii." Fez stammered out an explanation. Hyde walked around the El Camino and popped the trunk open to put the Christmas presents away.

"Now, since Jackie doesn't have a car, you're going to tell me how she gets here." Hyde crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"But, but I cannot tell you that." Fez protested weakly. "If I tell you, then I will have to live with an angry Jackie. And that is terrifying."

"Yeah, but if you don't tell me, then you'll have to hang out with an angry me." Hyde slammed the trunk lid. "So, what's it gonna be?"

"I cannot tell you how she gets here." Fez answered with a measure of defiance. "But I can tell you that if you look, you will find a car that you will definitely recognize."

"Fez, I didn't sign up to play Where's Waldo." Hyde threw open the driver's side door. "So, what am I looking for?"

"It is a car that you and I have spent many hours in." Fez answered, still hoping that his vague clues would be enough to tip Hyde off without actually telling him anything.

"Ah, it's the Cruiser." Hyde ducked into the car. "So, this is where Forman goes every day. Alright, glad we finally cracked that mystery." Hyde did a slow circle of the department store at one end of the Mall. When he came upon the Cruiser at the one end of the store with just a couple fire exits and the bay door for the loading dock. There was the Cruiser, pulled nose into a parking spot next to the fence under a flood light. Hyde pulled the El Camino up next to the Cruiser and put it into park. He got out and sat on the hood waiting for Jackie and Forman to come out.

Eric had actually seen Jackie turn and come face to face with Hyde from his seat in Santa's Workshop. Only layers of makeup and costuming likely kept him from being recognized to. The two of them popped the back door to the store open and neither of them was shocked to see Hyde there waiting for them.

"Well, if it isn't Forman and the elf." Hyde sarcastically shot from the hood of the car. "Forman, how did you keep this from us, man? This is hilarious!"

"Hyde, do you think you could lay off?" Eric groaned as he stepped up next to the Cruiser. "We just got off work. Besides, it' not like you weren't staring at her ass before you found out it was her."

"What?" Hyde pushed a look of fake disbelief to his face. "Whatever, man. I'm just shocked you were able to work with her without bringing the elf jokes home."

"And you!" Jackie turned on Fez. "How could you betray me like this?! I told you that he'd be like this if you told him!"

"But I did not say anything." Fez threw his hands up in exasperation. "I tried to keep your secret. Really, I did. Hyde wanted to go Christmas shopping for the Formans and he didn't want to go to Price Mart."

"Yeah, right." Eric popped the driver's door open. "Everyone knows you can't keep a secret."

"Sure, I can." Fez got angry. "After all, I did not tell you that Hyde slept with Donna!"

"Fez!" The sunglasses almost fell off Hyde's nose.

"What?!" Eric and Jackie spat the question out simultaneously. But neither felt as disappointed or betrayed as they thought they would. Mostly, it was just shock. It was something that neither of them actually thought would happen. "Whatever." Eric just shook his head and got into the Cruiser. Jackie climbed into the passenger seat next to him and Eric backed the car out of the parking lot.

As they pulled out of the parking lot, Eric flipped on WFPP and Vanessa's Vixen Hour was obviously playing another heartbreak set list with the latest from Billy Joel.

Honesty
Is such a lonely word
Everyone is so untrue
Honesty
Is hardly ever heard
And mostly what I need from you

BAD-TIME-TO-BE-IN-LOVE-THAT-70s-SHOW

Donna was sitting on the stoop outside the Forman's for the first time in a long time. When they'd gotten off work last night, Hyde had come running over to her place to let her know that Fez had spilled the beans about the two of them to Jackie and Eric. Once upon a time, she would have expected Eric's wrath. She didn't now. That actually kind of made it worse. When he was angry, she could at least tell that he cared. But she didn't expect him to ever bring this up.

Jackie came striding up the Forman's walk to the stoop and it was everything that Donna could do to not bury her head in her chest. "Jackie, before you start let me just say that I'm sorry…and I was drunk…and I'm sorry."

"Actually, I think I should be thanking you." Jackie took a seat next to Donna on the stoop. "I think I was having a little trouble moving on from Steven but hearing that the two of you had…well, you know…"

The fact that even as they were discussing this incredibly awkward situation and Jackie still couldn't bring herself to use the word 'sex' brought a smile to Donna's face. "Yeah, I was there, even though I don't remember all of it."

"Yeah, well, it's weird." Jackie sighed. "I think that there's always a like a temptation to go back if you can and like try to find a comfortable place again. I just don't think that that's what I'm supposed to do right now."

"So, you're okay with the fact that I slept with Hyde?" Donna was still a little shocked at how well Jackie was taking all this.

"I mean, it's a little weird." Jackie shrugged and avoided Donna's eyes as she tried to process everything that was going on in her head. "But, I guess since the two of us broke up and he's even been married since, I just don't really care. You know?"

"Yeah, I guess I can understand that." Donna nodded slowly. "You know, on the one hand I was kind of upset that Fez told you guys but on the other hand, I'm shocked that he kept the secret for five days."

"I probably have to lighten up on him." Jackie laughed. "I didn't speak to him after he got home last night. "

"Yeah, I heard that he let slip that you're the shift supervisor in Santa's Workshop this year." Now it was Donna's turn to avoid eye contact. "Honestly, I was surprised that you took the job. I always thought that you hated kids. Except for that time that you gave Kelso that egg to see if he'd really matured."

"It surprised me, too." Jackie smiled brightly. "But I really like it. The kids all seem really happy to be there. Even the babies. I mean, a few of them cry when they first sit on Santa's knee but our Santa is really good at getting them to laugh and it gets really easy after that."

"What are you going to do after Christmas Eve?" Donna was genuinely curious. Anyone who'd spent time with Jackie over the last few weeks could see a change in her. There was more confidence and a little less confusion. She seemed happier and more focused. When they first started hanging out, Donna used to envy Jackie a little. It seemed like she had everything she wanted. Now, with her Mom having run off and her Dad in prison, it seemed less and less like Jackie was going to keep it together.

But that wasn't the person that she was talking to right now. This Jackie seemed much more like the person that she first met. The kind of person who could have one good thing and seemed to turn it into ten. "I don't know." Jackie stared off over Donna's shoulder. "But I just feel like I'll find something, you know?"

"Sure." It was that kind of confidence that she envied. She'd talked to Marquette about enrolling in the winter term after Christmas and she'd heard back just a couple days ago that she'd been accepted. It meant that Hot Donna was going to go from being a weeknight show on WFPP to the weekend afternoon shift. It meant six hour shows instead of three hours each night. It also meant coming back to Point Place on the weekends. But Donna didn't feel like she could ask her Dad to bear all the cost of her school. "So, Hyde said you're working with Eric. What's that like? You two never got along."

"It's really good." Jackie's smile grew just a little wider. Something that didn't escape Donna's notice. "He's a lot funnier than you ever told me. Also, it's just kind of nice to have someone there who is genuinely interested when good things happen to you."

"Yeah." There was a wistful tone in Donna's voice. There were things about Eric that were hard to find in other guys. Particularly other guys her age. But then, other guys her age weren't raised by Red.

"We also get a chance to talk when we drive into or home from work together." Jackie's voice softened. "He's not as twitchy when no one is shouting at him."

BAD-TIME-TO-BE-IN-LOVE-THAT-70s-SHOW

Hyde was slumped down in front of the television that night. The gifts for the Formans were stowed in the trunk of the El Camino until Christmas. The only reason for that was that Mrs. Forman was known for finding new places around the house to hide the presents that she bought.

Over his head, he heard the hard lumbering steps of Eric coming down into the basement. He hadn't really talked to Forman for more than a few sentences at breakfast this morning. The TV blared back at him. Truth be told, he couldn't even tell you what was on. Eric jumped over the back of the couch nonchalantly and just started watching television.

"So…" Hyde huffed out. He hated the uncomfortable silences. Besides, Forman was his best friend. He could use someone to talk to and it was just easier if they weren't fighting.

"So." Eric answered back.

"Listen, Forman, I didn't want to you to find out that way, man." Hyde sat up. "It wasn't something that was planned. We just got drunk one night and…stuff happens."

"I don't care about that." Eric shook his head. "Really, it doesn't bug me."

"Like actually doesn't bug you or like fake-zen doesn't bug you?" Hyde pressed. "Because if it's the fake-zen doesn't bug you then all that's going to happen is that you're going to bottle it up for a few days until you do something stupid and you have to explain it."

"No, it actually doesn't bother me." Eric shrugged. "I've watched Donna move on before. It's nothing new."

"See, this feels like fake-zen doesn't bug you." Hyde leaned forward. "Like you're trying to convince yourself that it doesn't bug you but it really does."

"It doesn't." Eric's voice got louder. "It actually doesn't. It would be like you seeing Jackie with another guy after all this time. That wouldn't bug you, right?"

"Nah, man." Hyde shook his head. "After Samantha, and now Donna, I'm over Jackie."

"It's the same thing for me." Eric's voice even back out. "If you want to know what did bug me, I don't think you needed to stick around just to burn Jackie."

"Dude, since when do you care what happens to Jackie?" Hyde scoffed in disbelief.

"I mean, she's trying really hard to put things together." Eric was straining to explain in a way that made him sure that he was talking about Jackie and not himself. "She could use a little support. At work she actually talks less."

"So that's what it takes." Hyde had a laugh. "If I'd known that, I would have tried to get her a job when we were together."

"See, that's why I'm talking about, man." Eric slapped a hand off his knee. "We're all supposed to be friends and it seems like we've spent the last few weeks just sniping at each other."

"And that's different how?" Hyde laughed. "Don't go all girly on me, Forman. It's Christmas the sugar and spice crap is already starting to wear me out."

"I just think it would be nice to have everyone hang out more than two at a time for once." Eric grumbled. "Kelso will be home for Christmas."

"Listen, Forman man, you can't just wish for the way things were." Hyde got very serious. "I may have gone a little hard on Jackie yesterday and I don't know what kind of weird friendship the two of you have going but if it'll make you stop whining, then I'm sorry, alright?"

The two of them sat in silence for a few seconds. "So, what the heck do you do at that store, anyway?"

"Depends on the shift." Eric shrugged. "It's just a seasonal thing. I'll be gone after Christmas."

If you search for tenderness
It isn't hard to find
You can have the love you need to live
But if you look for truthfulness
You might just as well be blind
It always seems to be so hard to give