A/N: THE LONG AWAITED RATED M CHAPTER. PRAISE ME, FOR I AM GOOD TO YOU. It's a long one too. I even made it extra special and dirty because you all have been so patient.

Reviewers!Once again, I am in a rush as I'm still away, but I felt bad for making you wait. Thanks so much for all the reviews! I'm so happy you all enjoyed the last one. Things will be getting exciting again soon!

Like-a-Slasher-Film: Thank you SO MUCH. I can't tell you how flattered and thrilled I am that you've enjoyed my story so much. I'm sorry for the emotional rollercoaster, but I'm really happy you understand where I'm coming from with Remus and Rowan's turbulence. I'm definitely of the opinion that happiness needs to be found within one's self first before it can be found with another. I'm afraid I might break your heart again, but I promise it'll be worth it! Thank you again!

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Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Chapter 45: Of the Act of Giving

Rowan woke slowly to the bright white light of Christmas morning. She curled into the covers at the bright red glow behind her eyelids, rolling over to bury her face in the crook of Remus' arm.

But he wasn't there.

She shot up out of bed and looked around frantically. The space beside her was totally empty with no remnants of his heat – when had he left? The air was cold as the covers fell away, and a shot of ice sprang from her feet as she placed them on the wooden floor. He was gone.

As Rowan felt her stomach seize with panic, she breathed deeply and buried her face in her hands. Calm down, she thought. There's an explanation for this. You're overreacting. She took another deep breath and rubbed her eyes blearily, the darkness behind her hands soothing. She took another breath and then opened her eyes again, assessing her apartment evenly.

Rowan noted with a huge sigh of relief that his clothes from the night before still remained hung over her chair – he'd be back. But where had he gone? She glanced over at her clock. It read 10:05. She sighed again and decided it was about time for her to get up anyway. She grit her teeth and threw the covers off, heading for the bathroom and then the kitchen. She'd make some tea. Remus might want something warm to drink when he got back.

Remus walked briskly down Rowan's street, eyes squinting against the blinding white winter light that burst from the sparkling snow. He thanked the city for shoveling the sidewalks, for there had been a heavy snowfall a few days prior, and his legs were already slightly sore from the intense snowball fight from the night before. He smirked to himself – it was more of a battle, really.

He had woken early, around 7:30, to the soft sounds of Rowan's breathing and her body pressed tightly against his, and his body had responded rudely in kind. He had done his best to quell his urges, rolling away from her and even sitting on the cold floor for a bit, but it was growing harder and harder to not just reach over and touch her.

It had been three and half months now since she'd begun to humor his attempts at courting her again, and he'd finally made a breakthrough the month before. And last night! His body stirred at the memory of the soft sounds she'd made in her room, the way she'd pushed back against him, wordlessly asking for more. He didn't want to push her when she was already setting aside her numerous fears to try and give him the benefit of the doubt, but it was becoming so difficult to not press her against any surface he could find and just take her.

He smiled again with his chest bursting with sparks as he recalled the rest of the night. She'd finally told him that she loved him again. He was so ecstatic with the fire in his blood that he could punch something. He thought of the way her eyes had glowed so disbelievingly, the way her entire face had lit up like the sun, and her quiet confession. It had taken all of his self-control to not totally overwhelm her with his affections.

Since Halloween, he'd been considering what she'd told him about lycanthropic reproduction, and he admitted to himself with some embarrassment that he truly knew very little about the research done on his own kind. He'd spent some time since then going through the literature to see the data with his own eyes, and she'd been right – there had been no evidence that his condition could be passed on to a child. The realization had completely sucked his breath away.

The implications of this newfound knowledge had washed over him slowly over the past couple of months, and soon, he'd found himself staring at Rowan wistfully, thinking of her with the Weasley boys in her arms, with their small faces filled with adoration for her. He imagined them instead with her dark hair and bright smiles, and suddenly, he realized that he wanted to be the man to give her that family more than anything.

So when James and Lily had announced their pregnancy, all the images of his secret reveries came surging to mind, and as he'd watched Rowan's eyes falter quietly with some sadness – undoubtedly questioning whether she'd ever have that as well – he'd understood that it was time to make that next commitment. He'd make his intentions known.

She'd been a vision of happiness, and he mused that his every happy moment after would be filled with the image of her teary smile, the way she'd clung to him desperately in the dark, as if trying to convince herself that it was all real. As they'd walked down her street after Apparating back into London, he'd grabbed her several times to kiss her breathless, and her laughter had echoed through the empty snowy streets. It had never sounded so wonderful.

But despite the need that still lingered in his loins from their interlude earlier that evening, he hadn't pushed her to make another step with him. He'd been somewhat hopeful as she'd pulled him up into her flat, but she'd fallen asleep pressed against him, arms wrapped tightly around his middle. He'd laid awake a little longer, just appreciating the blue glow of night on her cheek and the warmth of her form melded into his. And as he'd fallen asleep, he didn't think it was possible to be happier.

But that didn't mean he didn't want her to want him. He was beginning to wonder how long he'd be able to handle being so physically close to her without really touching her. In his nights alone, he'd imagine the ways she used to say his name and writhe beneath him, above him – the way her muscles would squeeze him tightly as he brought her to completion. No matter how much he tried to convince himself, the pressure of his hand paled in comparison to the rhythmic clench of her body, the feeling of her skin burning against his. It was becoming too much for him to handle, and after the night before – after feeling her leg draped over his waist again and hips pushing against him – he had desperately needed some sort of release.

And so he'd given up and thrown himself into the cold outside. He felt immensely guilty for leaving her in bed alone, but it was better than embarrassing himself or overwhelming her with his physical needs when she clearly still wasn't ready. He'd even jogged a few blocks, lungs searing with the frigid winter air, just to keep his body occupied. It was enough to distract himself from his more pressing urges, and as he walked back, hands gripping a bag of fresh pastries for him and Rowan, he was feeling more confident that he could control himself.

Rowan jumped as she heard the key in her door turn, and she spun around from the kettle on the stove to see Remus standing in the doorway with reddened cheeks from the cold, a large paper bag, and a bright smile. She'd known that he'd return, but she still felt her lungs fill with relief all the same.

"Sorry for disappearing," he said sheepishly, moving in and closing the door behind him. "I was craving a croissant. I hope you don't mind that I borrowed your keys." He moved towards the table, setting both the bag and keys down and then pulling his coat off. He shook his head like a dog, his hair flopping around and releasing a small cloud of snow. The boyish grin he shot her as he hung his coat over his chair sent a surge of heat through her, and she couldn't help but smile back.

"No, not at all," she said. "Good timing too." She pulled the kettle off the stove and began pouring the boiling water into her teapot. The heat hit her face soothingly.

She felt a heavy pressure hit her back as Remus' arms wrapped around her waist. "Good morning," he murmured against her neck. His words grazed over her hotly, and she shook herself mentally at the inappropriate ache that shot through her. She turned in his arms to face him and snaked her arms around his neck and smiled.

"Good morning."

He smiled gently at her, effectively melting away any doubts that had crept into her mind earlier. She glanced past him and saw her keys on the table, suddenly reminding her of something with a slight blush. Remus arched a questioning eyebrow at her, and she grinned shyly. "Let's do presents first," she said excitedly.

Remus laughed softly and swooped down with a swift kiss before releasing her and moving to his coat pocket. She bounced away towards her nightstand and pulled one of the smallest gift boxes Remus had ever seen. It was even smaller than her tiny palms. He arched a brow at her again, but she just blushed and smiled coquettishly. The expression was incredibly endearing. He had to stop himself from kissing her again.

They sat on her bed across from each other with their respective presents in their laps. Remus mused that Rowan looked like she might burst.

"You first," she rushed breathily.

Remus sighed and ran a hand through his hair nervously as she glanced down at the small package in his hand. Rowan's eyes scanned over it excitedly. It looked like a book, but if Remus was giving it to her, it was probably very special. He was always a thoughtful gift-giver – she'd loved each gift he'd given her over the years, even when they'd just been friends. She bubbled as he handed it to her, trying her best to not grin as she carefully pulled the silver wrapping paper from it.

It was indeed a book, but there was no title, no cover image. The cover and binding were completely blank, a deep shade of scarlet leather. She looked at it questioningly then up at Remus, who was watching her carefully. She flipped through the pages – empty.

"What does it do?" she asked.

"It's a conjoined diary," he explained quietly. "I have the same one. Everything either of us writes in it will be seen by the other, so even if we're apart for whatever reason, we can still communicate through this." He eyed her cautiously with a nervous expression.

Rowan slid her hands over an open page, feeling the smooth feeling of the paper inside. She flipped it to the first page and saw Remus' small, elegant script: For Rowan, my favorite subject.

Rowan felt that distant cracking again deep inside of her as she gripped the soft leather book in her hands. She grazed her fingers idly over the smooth ink and cherished the way Remus had written her name. She glanced up to see him chewing his lip in his worried way with brows furrowed. She held the book tighter, as if she were holding a piece of him, and she smiled.

"I love it. I love you," she said sincerely.

Relief melted over Remus' face. He smiled brightly at her, and she leaned forward on her hands and knees, kissing him softly. He sighed happily against her, and as she pulled away, his eyes glowed with contentment. She sat back down and grasped her own tiny box, her shyness returning.

"I actually have two for you," she said, smiling nervously. Remus grinned.

"Really? Is that the first?" he asked, gesturing to the tiny package. Rowan fiddled with it and nodded, handing it to him nervously.

Remus noted that the box was extremely light. He shook it experimentally and heard something hard thud. His face screwed up with confusion, and Rowan grinned with anxious excitement. He turned it over in his hands before peeling the red metallic paper away. The box was of plain white cardboard – a tiny box with a lid. He pulled the lid away to reveal a lone key. His brow furrowed with confusion momentarily before his eyes widened with understanding.

He looked up questioningly to see Rowan chewing her lip nervously with a shy smile. "So you don't have to wait for me to come home anymore," she explained quietly.

Rowan thought her heart might burst at Remus' answering smile. He closed the box quickly and tossed it to the side. He grabbed her face quickly, kissing her soundly and silencing her laughter. She gripped his knees for balance, and his fingers tangled in her hair.

"I love you," he murmured against her lips. "I love you." She laughed and twisted her face away. His mouth trailed over her cheek and jaw.

"You still haven't seen the second present!" she laughed, peeling him off of her. He pulled away with excitement.

"What is it?" he asked.

Rowan smiled shyly, her chest clenching nervously. She crawled towards him on hands and knees slowly and pushed him back gently onto the bed. Remus' eyes widened with disbelief as his back then his head hit the mattress. She grinned at the surprise on his features before crawling onto his lap and straddling him, grinding her pelvis into his. He gasped, and his hands shot to her hips instinctively.

"Me."

Remus' eyes were still wide, as if expecting to wake at any moment. "Is this really happening?" he whispered.

Rowan laughed softly and leaned down, capturing his mouth. His fingers dug into the soft flesh of her hip, gripping her tightly, disbelievingly. Rowan felt her muscles clench in response, and she sat up and experimentally thrust her hips forward. He let out a choked gasp before trying to sit up and pull her towards him. She grinned and pushed him back down quickly, much to his shock and confusion.

"Rowan, I-" he protested.

"Let me," she said softly, leaning forward to kiss him.

She kissed him slowly, letting the heat between them build. His hands tangled in her hair and scored down her back, gripping desperately at her shirt. She could feel him hardening rapidly against her, but she wanted to take this slowly. She wanted it to count. She traced his lips with her tongue teasingly, and he opened his mouth to tangle his with hers beseechingly. He kissed her roughly, begging her to go faster, but she just smiled into the kiss, keeping her steady tempo.

She moved to his jaw, scraping her teeth against the sharp angle there, pulling a sharp intake of breath from him. She grinned against his skin as she moved to his neck, her tongue teasing at the point right below his ear. She felt him tense beneath her, his hands suddenly squeezing her rear desperately. She moaned low against his neck, letting her voice vibrate through him. He groaned in response and pulled her against him roughly, thrusting his hips upward. She gasped slightly at the feeling but maintained control. She would set the pace today.

"I wanted to show you how grateful I am," she whispered, trailing her lips to his collarbone. She reached up and tangled a hand in his hair, pulling his head back gently to expose more of his neck to her. He gasped as she sucked at the sensitive spot beneath his jaw line around his pulse, and his hands seared through the flannel pants she still wore.

"You've been so patient with me, even though I know how badly you've been wanting this," she continued, rocking her hips against him for emphasis. She scraped her nails across his scalp and down his chest through his shirt. His breath was coming raggedly now.

"Anything for you," he whispered.

Rowan's heart clenched, and she sat up quickly, bringing him with her. She tore at his shirt, pulling it roughly over his head. He moved frantically with her, throwing it to the side before groping for hers. She quickly grabbed his hands and pushed him back with her weight again.

"Rowan, come on!" he growled.

She simply grinned and shook her head. "Not yet," she teased. "We have all day."

He glared but obeyed, keeping his hands on her thighs, squeezing and kneading her desperately. She kissed him again deeply before pulling away and sitting back up.

As she slid her hands down his chest and stomach, Rowan admired the long white scars that trailed across his skin. There were a few new nicks and cuts along his forearms and stomach that she didn't recognize, and she felt heat flare in her chest in response. She wanted to memorize each new mark she didn't know, wanted to engrave each of his scars into her own skin. She grazed her fingers along the longest scar that ran across his chest then scraped her nails lightly down his chest and over his nipple. He hissed softly, his hands gripping her thighs almost painfully, and gazed up at her with a dark promise. She bit her lip and held his gaze, rocking her hips against him again. Rowan grinned at the groan Remus emitted.

"Rowan, please," he begged. "I want to touch you." She shook her head and reached down, peeling his hands from her thighs. His eyes widened with horror, but as he was about to protest, she cut him off.

"Just watch," she whispered.

When she knew that he wouldn't move his hands, she reached for the hem of her shirt slowly, keeping her gaze steady with his. He seemed to melt with desperation as she pulled the bottom of her shirt up painfully slow, trailing her fingers over her skin as she went. When she reached her breasts, she smiled knowingly at him, grazing over her nipples with a small gasp. She threw her head back and rocked her hips against him.

"Oh god," he groaned. His hands gripped at the sheets.

She pulled the shirt over her head with a cascade of her dark hair falling against her. Remus looked like he could cry with desperation and happiness all at once.

"Rowan, please, let me touch you," he begged.

"Not yet!" she teased softly.

He groaned in frustration, but it quickly dissolved into a guttural choking gasp as she gripped him through his pants. She slid her hand up his length through the material and watched his head fall back with a surge of pride. She slipped a few fingers beneath the waistband of his pants and boxer briefs and began to pull them down, moving off of him. Remus quickly reached down to help, shoving them down in a rush. She laughed softly at his eagerness as he kicked the material away, then pushed his hands to the side again.

The burning ache scored through her as she saw the evidence of his arousal. It had been so long since she'd seen all of him. She'd nearly forgotten how beautiful he was, how long his arms and legs were, how the muscles in his stomach and hips clenched as she touched him. She wanted more than anything to feel him inside of her again, but she'd set a plan for herself and was determined to see it through.

She grasped him in her hand, gently running her palm over his length. He inhaled sharply, nostrils flaring as he watched her, propped up on his elbows now. She moved back between his legs and slid her hand over the head slowly, spreading the fluids that had already begun to leak over him. He groaned, head falling back slightly. She chewed her lip with anticipation as she thought of how he used to push inside of her, how fully he stretched her. She wanted to see him unravel with her name on his lips.

Before he could fight her, she leaned down and took him into her mouth, tongue swirling around the sensitive head. She heard him choke on a broken form of her name, and her head swam with pride. She slid him further into her mouth as she reached down to grasp him at the base. Her other hand gripped his hip for support, pushing him further into her mouth wetly. He groaned deeply and she hummed with approval, letting the vibrations of her throat sear through him.

She set a slow but steady rhythm, enough to pleasure him but not enough to let him finish. His hips flexed and jerked against her, and her own muscles clenched in response. She knew she was already wet without him even touching her. She kept herself from reaching down and touching herself, focusing all of her attention on him. When she felt him begin to tremble, she looked up and saw him watching her with the hungriest expression she'd ever seen, lips parted slightly and panting. She held his gaze and took him in deeply, hitting the back of her throat.

And then she was being pulled up his body roughly with tearing hands and harsh breath. She realized weakly that he was tearing her pants down her legs, and then she was in his lap, her wetness pressed against him hotly. Her mouth was being scored with tongue and teeth, and all she could do was whimper as his hands pulled and squeezed at every part of her. His mouth was suddenly on her breasts, sucking at her nipples roughly. She cried out as his tongue flicked her, and he growled deeply against her skin.

His hands were squeezing and kneading her ass, pulling her against him so that his length was pressing against her entrance. She cried out against as he ground himself against her clit, and he groaned against her lips. Before she could stop herself, she was guiding him with shaking hands as he pushed into her, and as he buried himself inside of her she saw stars.

Her entire body shook with pleasure. She gripped at his back desperately as he held her against him, trembling slightly, panting harshly against her neck. He didn't give her a moment to adjust to him, however. He quickly set a brutal rhythm, slamming her hips down against him roughly. His hands held her tightly, almost painfully so, and she dug her fingernails into his back.

He was so much bigger than she'd remembered, stretching her fully with each jerk of the hips. She cried out with each thrust as she bounced on his cock, gripping his shoulders desperately as he took her. She felt her nipples graze against his chest sensitively as he held her against him, slamming her hips down onto him. His hands were everywhere – searing up her back, over her thighs, in her hair. He kissed her possessively as she rode him. She was vaguely grateful that he held onto her so tightly, for she couldn't figure out which way was up or down. All she could focus on was his overwhelming heat, the feeling of his length inside of her, and the pressure that was quickly building.

She knew he could tell how close she was. He held her gaze darkly as he thrust up into her and squeezed a hand between them to rub her sensitive spot. She cried out and felt her muscles begin to quiver. She realized it wouldn't take much longer to find her climax.

"Remus, I'm so close," she panted desperately.

Remus' eyes flared. "Yes, come on. Let me hear you," he growled.

He thrust hard into her again and again, and her muscles clenched down on him, squeezing him tightly as she came hard. She cried out loudly as she jerked and trembled against him, clutching his shoulders desperately. It seemed to go on and on, and as she felt him finish inside of her hotly with her name tearing from his lips in a choking gasp, they collapsed together in a heap of panting limbs.

Rowan breathed deeply as she tried to steady her racing heart. She was so warm. She closed her eyes and could almost believe that it was spring. She noted the wetness that remained between her legs with satisfaction. The man beside her was hers, his hands still wrapped tightly against her waist. She breathed in his scent deeply as she rested her head against his chest, savoring the memories it evoked. He was solid beneath her hands, warm against her skin. He was really, truly there.

She felt him begin to stir and let him roll her over onto her back. She opened her eyes and gazed up at him calmly. His eyes glowed happily with a gentle smile. He leaned down to kiss her slowly, letting the heat between them linger. When he pulled away, Rowan was sure her body would melt away.

"I love you," he whispered.

Rowan smiled and lifted her hand slowly to comb through his hair. She admired the silver that salted his brown hair and thought to herself that he looked very much like a man now.

"I love you," she breathed back.

He smiled softly, eyes trailing over her face. His hands danced at her waist, and she made no effort to hide herself, feeling extremely comfortable in her own skin. His smile broadened, and he squeezed her breast playfully. She laughed and swatted his hand away, but he grinned and pinned her wrist down, rubbing his face against her chest with a satisfied groan. She squealed at his sudden perversion and wrestled against him.

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting to touch you like this again," he groaned, mouth slightly muffled as he pressed it against her skin. She laughed delightedly and pushed him away. He grinned at the light blush on her cheeks before scraping his gaze down her form with deep admiration.

"I didn't know you could be so sexy," he said teasingly. "You stripping for me while on top… holy shit. I thought I'd died and gone to heaven," he sighed. "You don't know how many times I fantasized about you doing something like that this past year."

Rowan grinned. "You fantasized about me?" she asked slowly.

Remus looked at her with an incredulous expression. "Are you kidding? Everyday probably since we were 15," he said. He sighed wistfully. "Never came close to the real thing though. I mean my god..."

Rowan laughed and admired his lean form, tracing her fingers over the definition in his arms. She laid on her side and slid her hand up his arm teasingly, nails scraping over his scars.

"Tell me what you'd fantasize about," she urged quietly.

Remus looked at her with a dark expression before grinning slowly. He ran his hand gently down her spine. She shivered lightly at the feeling and smiled up at him, trailing her fingers from his shoulder down his chest.

"You tell me first. Did you think of me too?" Remus asked quietly.

She could see the burning expression behind his eyes and knew he'd wondered about her while they'd been apart. She had told him that she and Barty had never done anything, but she was beginning to realize how much it had bothered him to see them together. She wondered if it still haunted him even now.

She smiled. "Maybe," she teased. She brushed her thumb over his nipple, and he shivered, gaze darkening. She inhaled sharply as his nails dug into her back lightly, scratching over her skin.

"Tell me," he breathed. He lowered his head and ghosted his lips over hers teasingly, pushing her back again. She gasped as she felt his fingers whisper at the underside of her breast. He teased her again by sliding his fingertips along the curve and upward, coming close to her peak but never touching her where she was most sensitive. He grinned at the light frustration that began to appear on her features.

"Did you ever touch yourself while thinking of me?" he whispered against her lips. He teased the corner of her mouth with his tongue, then flicked her nipple lightly with his thumb. She gasped, arching up against his hand, but he pulled it away.

"Yes," she admitted breathlessly.

He grinned and kissed her lightly. She tried to reach up to deepen the kiss, but he pulled away again. She growled in frustration, but he continued to tease her, flicking her nipple again lightly then grazing the curve of her breast with his callused fingers.

"How?" he asked.

Rowan looked up at him with her face burning. They'd always enjoyed dirty talk in bed, but this was new. He continued to touch her teasingly with that smug grin. She knew she'd have to give him something before he'd continue.

"I'd touch my breasts first," she whispered, holding his gaze steadily. The heat in his eyes flared.

"And what did you think about?" he breathed. He slid his fingers between her breasts slowly. She savored the feeling.

"I'd think of your mouth." His lips pressed against hers again, firmly this time. He slid his mouth languorously against hers, and she sighed into the kiss. But then he pulled away again.

"What about it?" he asked quietly. He traced the underside of her breast again teasingly.

"Your tongue," she gasped as he flicked her nipple again. "Your tongue and your lips… They're so good."

"Where did you want them?" he whispered against her lips. Rowan tangled her fingers in his hair, begging him to kiss her fully, but he wouldn't budge. He just grinned and shifted slightly, smiling against her cheek.

She breathed deeply with frustration, battling with what she should tell him. She didn't know why she was so embarrassed – he'd teased her countless times before – but this was different. Speaking so explicitly seemed so intimate, so shameless. Her entire body burned.

He slid down her body, dragging his lips and teeth along the sensitive skin of her throat and chest. She gasped as he grazed the curve of her breasts with his lips. She could feel his breath over her nipples, but he held himself a couple inches away from touching her. Her entire body ached.

"Remus, please," she whispered, grasping his shoulder beseechingly. He grinned, his fingers dancing along her ribs. She trembled.

"You have to tell me what you want," he said darkly. His eyes burned into her. "Where did you want my mouth?"

"There. Please!" she begged, gripping his hair almost violently. He laughed softly at her wantonness and lowered his head to her breasts, taking her nipple into his mouth.

Rowan's entire body burned. She felt the heat shoot straight to her core as Remus licked and sucked at her breasts, fingers gently grazing and pulling at her skin. She panted and whimpered as his tongue trailed down her stomach and over her ribs, hands scalding down her sides and over her hips.

"What else did you imagine?" he murmured. His voice rumbled deeply against the dip of her pelvis, and she gasped as he pushed her thighs apart slowly, settling himself between them. She was so exposed, and he made it a point to emphasize it. He grinned roguishly up at her with his mouth dangerously close to her most sensitive places. She thought her face might burn. She had to avert her eyes or else she might implode.

"You'd touch me there," she whispered, avoiding his gaze. He was overwhelming her.

His fingers trailed over the seam where her thighs met her hips, and she gasped, choking on her own lungs. She didn't even have to look at him to know he was smirking at her.

"Here?" he asked softly.

She shook her head minutely.

His fingers grazed gently, calluses scraping along her sensitized skin. They danced along her pelvis, dangerously low. The ache was almost unbearable. She whimpered.

"Look at me, Rowan."

She brought her eyes back to his hesitantly to his and thought she might burn away beneath his gaze. He was propped up on his elbows between her thighs, so close to touching her and yet clearly showing that he wasn't ready to give her what she wanted yet. His hand was splayed against her hip, thumb brushing her hipbone. His expression was predatory.

"I'm not going to touch you until you show me how."

Rowan's lips quivered as she half-heartedly glared at him. He grinned and leaned back. I'm waiting.

Rowan sat up on her elbows with her face still burning, but she held her chin up defiantly. She spread her legs further so that he had a full view, daring him to look at her. He inhaled sharply at the sight but remained propped on his elbows. His gaze pierced through her.

"Show me," he breathed. The deep note of his voice sent heat shooting through her.

She raised her hand hesitantly and downward slowly, scalding down her stomach until she reached her hips. His eyes followed the simple movement with deep rapture.

"I'd imagine you here," she whispered.

The heat in his gaze flickered. "And what would I do?"

Rowan slid a finger slowly up her folds, coating her fingers in the wetness that had already begun to build again. She spread herself slightly for him to see. His nostrils flared with anticipation.

"You'd touch me here," she whispered. She slid her finger over her entrance and then up to her bundle of nerves. She rubbed it gently with her wet fingers and gasped softly, hips trembling. She pushed a finger inside and bit her lip to muffle her voice.

But it escaped anyway unbidden as she felt another hand cover her own, a longer finger pushing into her roughly to join hers. She moaned loudly, her own voice mixed with a low rumbling groan from Remus. He slid his finger back out, pulling hers with it, before sucking her fluids off of both. She could feel his tongue swirl around her finger and his teeth scrape along the sensitive pad of her fingertip. His eyes blazed, and a tremor shot through her hotly as she watched.

Then his mouth was back on her again, and she fell back against the mattress as his tongue darted out, running up the seam of her folds before flicking at her sensitive bundle of nerves. Her hips jerked up and she shrieked slightly as he sucked on it gently. His tongue teased her relentlessly, hands gripping her thighs tightly, holding her hips in place as she bucked and thrashed. Quickly, her muscles began to tremble, and she knew she was close. She cried out again as he slid a finger into her and pulsed it at that electric spot behind her clitoris. Her muscles collapsed around his finger.

She was coming hard against his mouth, bucking and moaning. He groaned against her, lapping and sucking like a starving man. His fingers gripped her thigh almost painfully. But then as her muscles began to calm, she felt him slide up her body, and he thrust hard into her.

"Fuck!" he hissed. Rowan cried out his name, her muscles clenching again around him.

He didn't move, staying still and trying to get his bearings as the aftershocks of her orgasm settled. He shuddered against her, eyes clenched shut as if savoring every tremble of her hips. When his eyes reopened, his gaze was dark.

"Again," he commanded.

Again, he took her hard, thrusting roughly but purposefully into her. She felt him hit that spot behind her front wall that made her scream over and over again, and all she could do was take him. She cried out loudly as he thrust against that spot again, her hand shooting to her mouth to muffle her voice. Remus' eyes flared, and he reached forward quickly, pulling her hand from her mouth and pinning it down.

"Let me hear you!" he growled. He thrust hard again, and she cried out loudly. He grinned roguishly and continued to take her roughly.

It was too much! She'd already come twice now – how could he expect her to again? Her muscles were already beginning to spasm with the warnings of her next orgasm, but it was overwhelming. Surely, she couldn't come again!

"Remus, I can't! Too much!" she begged brokenly.

"You can!" he growled, thrusting hard into her. She shrieked, hips trembling wildly. His grip on her hips tightened as he sped up, thrusting against that spot mercilessly.

"Say my name," he commanded gruffly. He thrust again.

"Ah, Remus!" Rowan cried out. Her head was swimming. She couldn't take this. It was cruel. Her body couldn't withstand this much pleasure.

"Mine," he growled. His eyes burned into her. "Not Barty's, not anyone else's – mine!"

"Yes! Remus!" she begged.

And then her climax hit her hard. She screamed and trembled, hips jerking against his as he shouted out his completion and emptied himself inside of her. She didn't think it would ever end. Her muscles squeezed and tensed and clutched desperately to him. Her entire world went white as she shook, and as she came back down, her hips continued to tremble.

Remus' collapsed on top of her, panting harshly against her chest. She lifted her hands weakly to hold him against her, fingers threading through his hair.

She felt as if every muscle in her body had disconnected. She felt Remus twitch, still inside of her, and smiled softly. She felt a dull ache below as her muscles stretched and adjusted. It had been so long since anyone had touched her there. She sighed happily at the languid feeling of completion that settled into her bones.

Finally, Remus began to stir, struggling to sit up. He propped himself up on his elbows to look at Rowan. She smiled gently at him, which he returned, kissing her softly, slowly. When he pulled away, they both winced slightly at the feeling of him slipping out of her wetly. He stumbled a bit out of the bed, to Rowan's amusement, and grabbed his wand from the table, coming back to help clean up the remnants of their lovemaking. She giggled slightly at the sudden coolness that remained as he vanished away the fluids, and he tossed his wand to the side, grabbing her gently and kissing her again until she was breathless.

She grinned lazily at him. He raised an eyebrow and smirked back.

"What're you looking so pleased about?"

Rowan smiled, her eyes struggling to remain open. "We forgot about breakfast," she mumbled.

Remus laughed softly and kissed her again, pulling her in against him tightly. The winter sun spilled in through her window and onto the white sheets of her bed. She sighed sleepily, contentedly, as she felt his hands linger and skim across her skin. She smiled as sleep draped over her again, and she knew happily that the man beside her would be there when she woke.