Chapter 2- Where's the Relay?
The crew of the volus cruiser were in a state of mass confusion. Where there was clearly supposed to be a mass relay, there was empty space. The cruiser itself was drifting through space, all thoughts of powered flight forgotten, as it orbited the system's star. However, they were not alone.
"This is the UES Chandra. We have 1 council ship in the system. Profile seems similar to that of a turian cruiser, although there are noticeable differences. What are our orders?" Captain Boris Mikhailovich said as his corvette sat about 3000 kilometers off the alien craft.
The reply came a few seconds later. "You are to make yourself known. The relay is being brought out of jumpspace in approximately 5 minutes."
"Acknowledged." Boris said, before ordering his crew to drop the sensor mask. The effect was immediate. The alien cruiser turned around and hailed his ship.
"Attention unidentified cruiser. We are on a diplomatic mission. If you attack, the council will hunt you down."
The voice quickly came from the communicator.
"What race do you represent?" Boris replied.
"We represent the Vol protectorate. This is the volus cruiser Kuuian. We are seeking a diplomatic meeting with humanity, but the relay into their space seems to have gone... missing." The volus on the other end spoke quickly, quite unlike the wheezing, slow speaking, tired creature from humanity's previous contact with them. 'This must be them talking without their suits,' Boris reasoned.
"We have secured the relay in this system shortly after contact was made with a volus mining ship in the system now called New Haven. The relay will be replaced right about... now." As he spoke those words, a portal generator fired, and the relay was brought into the system, the portal quickly scanning over the massive space station, bringing more and more of it into view. The relay, plus a few man made additions, floated in space in all its glory.
If dropping jaws made any noise, the bridge of the Kuuian would be the loudest place in the galaxy. Two hundred volus just saw a mass relay shimmer into existence in front of them. They were shaken out of their stupor by the voice of the human admiral saying: "Well, are you going to use the relay or not? Because it takes a lot of power to dimensionally displace a mass relay, and I would hate to explain to my superiors that the display you just saw was a waste of their time."
The cruiser moved towards the relay, the human ship close behind them. Then, they hit the relay and were catapulted hundreds of light years away.
"Attention alien vessel. This is Shanxi orbital control. You have been assigned a flight path to the planet's surface. Do not deviate. Repeat, you have been assigned a flight path. Do not deviate, or you risk a collision." The planet's space traffic control station hailed the Kuuian as soon as it entered the system. The captain responded by saying "Our vessel is not able to fly in atmosphere. Are there any orbital facilities to which we may dock?"
The traffic control station responded several seconds later. "A new course has been assigned to you. You will proceed to dock with Stardock 4 in Shanxi orbit. Do not deviate. Shanxi orbital control out." The cruiser flew along its pre-assigned course, the human cruiser following close behind. As the planet Shanxi and its orbital installations came into view, the crew's minds were blown for the second time that day. In orbit around the planet was a massive station, more than twice the size of the citadel. The Volus ship flew in closer, and saw that a large portion of that station was docking cradles and shipyards. The sheer size of some of the docking cradles once again blew the minds of the spectating volus, who wondered as to why would so many resources be wasted in the construction of such massive ships, as the element zero cost must have been enormous. Then, one of said ships flew by, covered in huge cargo containers. It passed just under the Kuulian's wing, turning around before settling into a pre-assigned cradle. Huge mechanical arms immediately began to remove the huge cargo containers, moving them into the gigantic loading bay nearby. The Kuulian then neared its own cradle, turning around before lowering itself in. Even then, the cradle seemed oversized to the crew of the volus cruiser. "Give us a few minutes, we need to put our environmental suits on." The communications officer said, before the ship powered down.
Several minutes later, the Volus diplomatic delegation stepped out of the ship. A group of humans was waiting for them. "Our diplomats are waiting. We will escort you to the meeting room." the lead human said, before he and his four companions surrounded the volus and led them into the bowels of the station. They came to a human skycar, a long, black, official looking transport. As they came inside, they saw a table with several drinks on it, one for each member of the delegation. Some small pastries were provided as well, although the volus could not eat them. "Don't worry, they're safe to drink. You're levo like us, and its filtered so there are no nasty diseases in there." One of the human guards said as he boarded the transport. One of the volus took out an emergency induction port, plugging it into a filter in the bottom of his mask. Then he inserted the other end into the human drink and took a long sip. He reeled back. "What's *wheeze* in this stuff?" the volus asked.
"That is the best vodka on this station, paid for by ambassador Alexei Rozhenko." one of the guards answered.
"This stuff is *wheeze* strong." The volus said as he absentmindedly took another sip.
"That it is." The guard said, before turning around.
The Volus delegation drank their glasses quickly. As he finished, Bartu already saw the world slowly swimming in front of him. He staggered out of the skycar when it landed, one of his fellow delegates, who had several refills, falling out on top of him, knocking himself out in the process. The snoring delegate was quickly woken up, then the delegation walked into the meeting room.
The meeting itself went rather quickly. The humans made a few demands, nothing the vol protectorate couldn't handle, although Bartu still asked for payment, which the humans were more than happy to offer in resources. As he staggered back to the skycar, the ambassador called to him, "As thanks, I hope you enjoy the second bottle I left in the transport!"
Suffice to say, every single volus was happily drunk by the end of the ride back to the ship.
Ambassador Rozhenko was smiling all the way back to his shuttle. He had played those round little xenos like a fiddle. They even fell for the oldest trick in the book, as evidenced by their entering negotiations already tipsy, with one falling over in the middle of negotiations over trade agreements. The volus hadn't even asked for human technology, instead brokering several huge trade agreements in exchange for a few hundred tons of element zero and palladium. Those lightweight volus had even given them up to date starcharts and a complete map of the known relay network, as well as promising to side with humanity in negotiations with the rest of the council, all due to a single bottle of vodka. The entire session was recorded, giving Alexei all the leverage he would need in any upcoming negotiations with the volus
The Next Day
Ambassador Bartu woke up with a terrible headache. He was lying in the middle of the Kuuian's CIC, several other volus in various states of sleep around him. What could have caused this? He feverishly thought back to the previous day's negotiations, when suddenly it hit him. That bottle of strong alcohol. The human ambassador tried to get them drunk right before the negotiations began. 'What have I done?' Bartu thought to himself as he pulled up a document containing the results of the negotiations. He almost fell over right there. He had traded valuable intelligence, brokered mutually beneficial trade agreements, and promised the humans the support of the volus in upcoming negotiations with the council. Quickly wiping the evidence of the traded information, he groaned, and transmitted it to the waiting humans, who were loading element zero and palladium into his ship. The data finished transmitting, and Bartu wiped all evidence of said transmission, just as another volus woke up, groaning, rolling over to reveal a bottle of the human drink beside him, still plugged into a twisted emergency induction port.
A/N- Yaay! Drunk volus! Mutually beneficial trade! Ambassador Bartu in big trouble! What happens next? Tune in... next time.