disclaimer: i do not own bleach or any of its characters or locations mentioned in the manga or anime. i just own this story line and the OCs

warm bleachy welcomes to: blueanimefreak, E. E. Terrill, Lyisle Lualdi, sadfacehappyface, ookamikage14, and Rennay. thanks for joining the party 3

I AM SOOOOOO SORRY GUYS! total screw up...i wrote on my calendar that this chapter was supposed to go up today when it was actually supposed to be up last monday X| super huge apologies. and to show you how sorry i am, for all of you who i know just stayed up til the wee hours of the morning waiting for me to post (that was sarcastic by the way), i'll post the next chapter sooner than usual. probably in the next week or so. again, sorry for my brain fart =[ but enjoy anyway 3

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Chapter 10

No one was speaking. The only audible noise was the ticking of the clock sitting on the side cabinet. Shadows. That word swirled like smoke in my mind. I've heard it before…. As soon as the word had passed Urahara's lips I had felt an odd sensation. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end and my heart rate increased. I felt my breath catch and was suddenly very, very afraid. I couldn't figure out why that word frightened me so much, but it sounded so familiar. Not in the usual sense of what a shadow really was, but a familiar way that I could not call to mind.

"I've never heard of a…Shadow…before," Rukia said, and I almost winced at the harsh way she said it.

"Of course not, Miss Kuchiki. That's because all of us in the Soul Society believed them to be an extinct breed. Yet here they are," he gestured toward me with an open hand as if presenting me to an audience, "alive and reproducing, clearly." Everyone looked at me expectantly for a few seconds as if I would someone know what was going on before….

"Are there any other Shadows around?"

"What can they do?"

"Why did you think they were extinct?"

"Where did they come from?" The questions exploded from everyone like a bomb had just gone off. I didn't know what exactly to do. Everyone kept looking at me with guarded eyes and speaking with cautious tones. They were talking about Soul Reapers and spirit energy and Kidou, and I felt like my head was beginning to spin in circles. All of a sudden Ichigo and Rukia were supposed to have abilities like Renji's, and Orihime, Chad, and Uryuu all knew Urahara. Monsters with bone masks and holes were showing up and wrecking the town and I was seeing spirits around every corner. I had no clue what was happening and to top it all off, Urahara believed I wasn't even human.

Suddenly, I felt very alone in that room. Urahara had clearly identified me as an entity that had never before been known to anyone and they were all acting like I was some kind of wild animal. Rukia and Uryuu probably hadn't noticed, but they had both moved their bodies slightly so they were facing me at an angle, as if hoping to keep me in sight in case I did anything suspicious. Out of my loneliness, I suddenly felt anger flare.

As the questions kept coming, I realized I was obviously the only person in the room who had no clue what was going on. I had been kept in the dark all this time by people who had noticed something was strange about me. I was supposed to trust these people who called themselves my friends and yet they had acted like they never realized I was self-destructing. My hands balled into fists, and I strained to keep the heat inside me under control. I felt like screaming as loud as I could. I was done being ignored and treated like a small child that didn't matter.

I lifted my eyes from the table where they had been glued since the bombarding of questions had begun. They met Urahara's who had just put the lamp back together and sat down opposite me. He wasn't responding to anyone. He wasn't smiling or frowning. He was just…staring at me, expectantly almost. Like he was waiting for me to do something.

"You're a bastard." I said quietly, my voice venomous and filled with anger. Everyone looked at me and the room was suddenly silent. Orihime's hand was covering her mouth in shock, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything. In fact, I could have leapt over the table and strangled Urahara right then and I would not have cared at all. "You knew this entire time and you never said one damn thing to me. Never mentioned that you knew something, or that I was different."

"I tried. You were the one who told me to stay out of your business and that you could handle things on your own. In fact, I remember you telling me just last night that there was nothing to handle." He still stared at me, his eyes searching mine. I dropped my gaze. I had said that. But as an adult, he should have realized I was acting out of fear and anger and not thinking straight. And also-

"Wait," Renji's voice still came from behind me. He still hadn't joined us at the table, but was now sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall. "You haven't told her anything? Not even about Soul Reapers?" He laughed a bit. "No wonder she had no clue who I was. Isn't part of our job here to deal with any spirit beings we find? And wouldn't that mean at least telling her where she came from? The poor kid's been in the dark all this time." There was that word again.

"I'm not a child!" I screamed, twisting around to face Renji who looked a little shocked at my outburst. "I am so sick and tired of everyone here treating me like an idiot." Hot tears pricked my eyes out of extreme frustration. I wanted to flip the table to blast a hole through the wall. I was seething. Never before had I felt so looked down upon or let down. A light hand landed on my shoulder.

Spinning back around I saw Rukia, her hand still slightly extended toward me, staring at me. Her eyes were heavy and her mouth turned down in a frown. There was no trace of the coldness I had seen the day before anywhere on her face.

"We're sorry, Sayuri," she said quietly. "Renji's right. We should have all brought you here sooner but…it's complicated." Her eyes dropped and I was speechless. Still looking down, she finished quietly, "I'm sorry."

"We shouldn't have been so quiet about it," Ichigo added from across the table. His eyebrows were pulled together in the middle like they always did when he was really serious. The others nodded. Looking back at Rukia, I suddenly felt like a deflated balloon. Everything just felt so hard to handle. My anger and frustration, my friends, my whole new life, even who I was. I curled my knees to my chest and rested my forehead on them. Taking a deep breath I tried to keep my voice steady so as to not give away my sudden emotional exhaustion.

"I have no idea what's happening anymore," I said, not to any in particular.

"Neither do we for the most part," Urahara said, his voice softer now than it had been. "We'll have to all go through this together. Carefully."

"Then maybe it's time we fill her in," a voice said from near the doorway. Turning to look, I was surprised when I saw no one there. Only Yuroichi slinked into the room. Confused, I looked around. Everyone was staring at the cat. I looked at her too and saw her big golden eyes watching me. She jumped onto the table and sat facing me, her tail switching back and forth. "There's time for real apologies later. Yes, we're sorry, but your lack of knowledge was a safety measure."

If my eyes could have widened anymore, they probably would have popped out of my head. Stumbling backwards, I just stared at her. I had seen her mouth move and had heard the voice, but it took a few seconds for my brain to register that it was Yuroichi who was speaking. What was even stranger was that the voice was obviously male. But, Yuroichi was a female cat…wasn't she?

"The cat talked," I said stupidly. Urahara laughed quietly.

"You should see what else she can do." No one else seemed as perturbed by the talking cat as I was. She watched me patiently.

"I know this is all a big shock for you, Sayuri, but you're going to have to just go with it for now, ok?" I nodded, then shook my head a bit, wondering why I was answering a talking cat. Putting a hand on my forehead I hoped I had a fever and that I was hallucinating. I could see Ururu peek around the doorway and was suddenly reminded of Rikku and the way she peeked around the wall the first time she saw me. There are weirder things going on here than talking cats, Sayuri, I told myself. You can see dead people, and even touch them, so why is this so strange?

Turning back to Yuroichi, I took a deep breath and nodded slowly. Realizing I was going to need severe therapy after this was over, I crawled back to the table. She was right: there was obviously a lot I needed to learn. I was a bit uncomfortable with the fact that there were things about my life I had never known before. But how did Urahara seem to know so much more about me than I did?

"Was my mom a Shadow?" I asked Urahara suddenly, just thinking of the idea. He shook his head.

"No. Sakura wasn't a Shadow." He stole a glance at Yuroichi who nodded. "But she was a Soul Reaper." I heard a few surprised breaths around me, but I kept my eyes on Urahara.

"A Soul Reaper?" My mind scrambled a bit, but I remembered that that was what Renji had called himself. Urahara nodded.

"They're spirit beings also, whose job it is to keep the balance and order between souls in the world of the living and the Soul Society. They have other duties as well, but that's all you really need to know for now. At first we thought you were going to become one also. Flash Step, that super speed running you can now do, is an ability only Soul Reapers have. Also, your increased ability to sense spiritual pressures and see spirits would back up this theory even more."

"What about my lightning?" I asked, remembering the comment he had made earlier. "It's not…Kidō, or whatever that is?"

"No way," Renji said, finally dragging himself to the table. He squished himself between Uryuu and I, jabbing me with his elbow a bit. Rukia and I gave him annoyed looks as we moved over so we could all fit. "That trick you have is definitely not a Soul Reaper thing. The pressure's all wrong for it to be Kidō." Yuroichi hummed in agreement.

"The lightning that you're able to use, Sayuri, is actually real lightning. It's not made of spirit particles, or reishi, like a Soul Reaper's Kidō is. It's the raw element. That's how we were able to affirm that you were a Shadow." She licked a paw and let Urahara continue.

"Soul Reapers belong to the 13 court guard squads that protect the Soul Society. Squad 12 is in charge of research and technology, and they were the ones who first discovered Shadows all those years ago. According to the research, Shadows were able to harness the natural elements and form them into weapons. It's like their version of a zanpakutō."

"What's that?" I asked, confused.

"Our swords," Ichigo said. "Each Soul Reaper has one. It's how we fight off Hollows and other things."

"Shadows don't only have swords, though," Yuroichi said. "They use a variety of weapons, often reflecting their inner spirit, just like a zanpakutō does. However, the form of a Shadow's weapon depends on their style of combat as well. Yours doesn't seem to have developed into anything yet," she looked at me.

"But it probably will if I fight more, right?" She nodded.

"Correct."

"But what about last night?" I sat up onto my heels. Flashes of the Hollow, coiled up and ready to attack, ripped through my mind. In those moments I had been able to really focus on my lightning and harness it without solely relying on my emotions. That had to be some kind of improvement. I suddenly realized the thought of being able to shoot lightning from my palms no longer felt strange to me. Neither did all this talk of another world full of spirits. It felt familiar, like somewhere inside me I had known about these things my whole life and had just never thought on them. "I fought that Hollow last night with my lightning."

"That's not enough to solidify your powers," Yuroichi said. She stole a glance at Urahara and then looked back at me. "You would need to really exert yourself and use them extensively to gain proper control. We think it would be best if you started training with us, so we can see what exactly you're capable of."

"Train?" I laughed a bit. I could just see myself now running around the park shooting lightning bolts while a fascinated crowd looked on. Everyone's eyes would be watching me. I swallowed hard. As if I'm enough of an oddball already, let's just sign me up for that circus act. "Is that really a good idea?" I asked sheepishly, and Renji gave me a weird look. I could almost hear him calling me a baby.

"You would train here," Urahara pulled his hat down and sat back against the wall. I looked around the small room. Was he going to pull a training space out of his ass? Because there was definitely no room in the small shop. Out front in the yard would be just as public as anywhere else. But before I could ask, Uryuu, who had been quiet the whole time, finally spoke up.

"I think we've missed some of the most important questions." We all looked at him as he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. "One, if Sayuri's mother wasn't a Shadow, then she probably got her abilities from her father. Where exactly is he and is he someone we should worry about. And two, are there any other Shadows left?" Everyone suddenly looked anxious and turned towards Urahara. He didn't move and the seconds ticked by.

Yuroichi padded across the table and jumped down onto the floor. She walked up next to Urahara and stood up onto her hind legs. With her front paw, she swatted his hat away and hissed a bit. He scrunched up his face and huffed, looking like an angry child. Sitting up straight he ruffled the hair on the top of his head.

"Yes, Sayuri's father is, in fact, a Shadow." There was an audible intake of breaths around the table. Everyone looked troubled, but I couldn't understand why. Obviously if my mom wasn't a Shadow, then my dad had to be.

Suddenly I felt a chill, like someone had poured a bucket of ice down my back.

"You said 'is'," I looked at Urahara intently. "He 'is' a Shadow. That means-"

"He's still alive. Yes." Out of all the things I had learned so far that day, this was by far the most shocking.

I had never heard my mother mention my father. We never spoke about him, and I had never felt deprived not knowing him. My mom and I got on well enough and we didn't need anyone but each other. But she had told me he died when I was just a baby…and now Urahara was telling me this was a lie, that he was actually still alive. I had gone all this time knowing that I had no father. It couldn't be true.

"No. He's not," I said quietly.

"Yes, Sayuri, he is," Yuroichi purred.

"No. My mom told me he died when I was a baby. He's not alive. He's dead. He is." Yuroichi kept an intent look on her small furry face. I shook my head, slowly at first, and then faster as my breathing sped up. "My mom wasn't a liar!" I shouted at them. Where was their proof? How did they know he wasn't dead? This was too much. It couldn't be true. I shut my eyes tight and wished all of this would just go away. The Soul Reapers and Hollows, the lightning, and the eyes.

Suddenly they erupted in a burst of flame right before my eyes. Against the black of my eyelids, their crimson color was only made deeper, like fresh blood. They bore into me, paralyzing me with fear, digging deeper and deeper into my being. I felt my body heating up as if just by looking at them I was being set on fire. But I couldn't look away. I couldn't escape them no matter how hard I tried. I could hear the others' voices and I tried to call out, but my voice dried up in my throat.

A hand grabbed my chin and shook my head a bit. In less than a second, my eyes shot open and the crimson ones disappeared. They were replaced by a pair of bright golden ones. The room was quiet and Renji was kneeling over me, his grip firm on my face. He looked at me sternly, like someone reprimanding a child.

"This isn't really the best time for you to have a meltdown and electrify us." My palms felt extremely warm, and I was sure if I could look down I would see the familiar little bolts of lightning wrapped around my fingers. I tried to pull my head back, but Renji tightened his grip and held me still. "Whether or not your mom lied to you isn't important right now. Whatever issues you have, you need to put 'em on hold until we can get in control of what's happening here, got it?" He gave my head another shake and I reached up and grabbed his arm. Glaring at him, I let a little lightning shoot through my palm. It was nothing more than if you had accidentally left your finger on the metal of a plug you were putting into a socket, but he still jumped a bit. Yanking back his arm, Renji glared back at me.

"He's right. All of this has caught us a bit off guard." There was a darkness in Urahara's voice that made me look at him instead of shooting more lightning at Renji. He was playing with the hem of his kimono that was tied around him loosely like always. "We don't know who or where your father is, Sayuri. But, we do know that there are Shadows nearby. We've been able to sporadically detect their spiritual pressures and Renji has been trying to track them for a while. But, every time he gets close, they hide."

"How can they hide?" Ichigo scoffed. "Just pick up their spirit pressure again, it can't be that hard." Renji sneered back at him.

"Why exactly do you think they're called Shadows, you idiot?"

"What did you call me?" Ichigo leaned forward, his hands slamming down on the table. Renji did the same and you could almost feel the level of testosterone in the room increase. The boys puffed out their chests and squared off and I rolled my eyes. Hadn't he just criticized me for acting like a child? I guess having a man-off no longer qualifies as childish behavior…. Maybe there's a book on these rules I need to read….

Rukia took the pillow she was sitting on and threw it across the table. It hit both boys in their faces and they turned their tough faces on her. Unimpressed, she just stared them down. Quietly, they both sat back down, but not before they shot a few more glares at each other. I must learn her secret, I thought.

"The Shadows are capable of hiding their spiritual pressures from detection," Yuroichi said, jumping back onto the table. We all stared at her.

"They can…hide it?" Uryuu asked, dumbfounded. Even though I wasn't as up to date as everyone else was on this subject, I also found the idea pretty strange. If I had listened correctly, spirit pressure seemed to be something you radiated that came from within you. It was based on how strong your spirit was, but I was unaware that it had an OFF button. Apparently everyone else was too, because their faces all mirrored Uryuu's.

"That's why they're called Shadows, my dear children," Urahara said, resting back against the wall and placing his hat back over his face. His next words left me with chills down my spine. "At any moment, they can disappear before your very eyes and become just another face in the crowd. You'll never be able to tell who or where they are. Until they want you to."

ooo

The rest of the day passed in a blur. Somewhere during the rest of the conversation it was decided that after school, when I would normally come to Urahara's for work, my time would be split. Some days I would continue helping in the store like usual, and others I would train with either Urahara or Yuroichi. How I was supposed to be trained by a talking cat I was not yet aware of, but the details of everything were not to be decided at the moment. I was also forbidden to tell Emiko and Isamu anything that had occurred in the past few days on pain of death, or so said Urahara rather creepily so I was sure he was joking about the death part. I hoped. I understood why, though; they were innocent civilians and shouldn't be dragged into anything that might become dangerous. I certainly had no problem keeping them as far from harm as possible.

As I walked out of the shop, I couldn't help but feel like things had changed. Everyone was treating me like a ticking time bomb, as if at any moment I would call on some legion of Shadow monsters to come swallow the town. I wasn't evil. I would never do anything to harm anyone, but I could understand how losing control of my powers might be dangerous. I would need to be extra careful around anyone until I got a good grasp on controlling them.

Lost in thought, I almost didn't hear Rukia call my name until she ran to meet me in the yard. At first, we both just stood there quietly, facing each other. Then, we both started talking at the same time.

"Look, Rukia-"

"Sayuri, I-"

Stopping, we both stared at one another and then suddenly, Rukia started to laugh. I smiled to, and soon found myself giggling as well. We had both been so stupid in the last day or so, and it became more and more obvious every second that passed.

"I'm sorry Rukia," I said, looking down at my feet. "I should have told you when things started happening but I thought you would think I was crazy. I had no idea about any of this stuff."

"I know," she said, looking at me and smiling softly. Her eyes were full of apology. "We should have told you earlier. We knew things were starting to change with you but we didn't know exactly who you were or if you were safe to trust. And then you just freaked out and when you started saying everything out loud I just-"

"Rukia!" I grabbed her shoulders. She looked surprised, but I smiled.

"I'm just really sorry," she said, her shoulders sagging under my hands. I shook my head.

"Nothing to be sorry for," I told her. "I knew you'd have to have a good reason to react the way you did. And I don't blame you. If some new person moved in and started ranting about howling monsters I'd probably tell her she was crazy too." Rukia winced.

"Did I really say that?"

"Not exactly, but I'm sure you wanted to." She smiled and I felt a warmth spread through me. Ever since my freak-out on the school roof I had been going out of my mind thinking that Rukia was convinced I was crazy. But the way things were going, if all this Soul Reaper stuff was really true and I wasn't dreaming, she had to be just as crazy as I was. She had never really been against me, and that thought made me smile. Maybe my friends really were keepers.

"I really hate to break up this touching moment, but we've got a Hollow alert," Renji said, walking over to us with his hands in his pockets.

"We've got it," Uryuu said from the sidewalk just beyond the wall that surrounded the shop. He, Orihime, and Chad waved as they took off down the street.

"They're not Soul Reapers, right?" I asked.

"No. But what they are is complicated and would probably just make you more confused at this point," Rukia said, scratching her head and grinning. I grinned back until Renji decided to pitch in too. He placed a hand on my head and leaned down so his face was even with mine.

"You're little brain's probably fried already, isn't it?" He spoke in a baby voice so irritating I couldn't resist the urge to hit him. I socked him right in the stomach and he stumbled backwards. Rukia crossed her arms and gave an approving nod.

"Don't you have to run along home too?" I asked, irritated. Renji grinned and straightened up. Placing his thumbs in his pockets, he looked absolutely ecstatic.

"Yeah well, it's only a few steps to the front door from here," he said, gesturing back at the door to the shop. The triumphant look slid off my face and I stared at him in disbelief.

"No way," I breathed.

"Yes way." Renji turned and started walking back towards the shop. At the door, he looked back over his shoulder and said, "Your training should be pretty fun to watch. See you in class." I felt something squirm in my stomach. As if having to struggle to master my powers in front of Urahara and Yuroichi wasn't bad enough, now I was going to have Renji for an audience as well.

As I quickly waved goodbye to Rukia and started walking home, I found myself trying to decide if that thought bothered me or not. Although I had just met him, I already knew he was extremely irritating and obnoxious. However, there was a part of me, a small, tiny, microscopic, miniscule part, that didn't mind so much if Renji hung around. I could tell was going to be an interesting week.