A/n: A shorter one than usual, but I'm trying to get it up as soon as possible... (And it's TNT's idea (nearly forgot to mention that, sorry!))

Hiccup sighed, eyes cast downwards as he searched for the familiar ship of Trader Johan. By now, he couldn't honestly say it would surprise him if the man had managed to get into some dangerous situation - the tale of which he'd surely love to spend the next few hours regaling everyone with - and his ship had ended up wrecked.

'See anything yet?' Hiccup asked hopefully, trusting Toothless's better vision to be able to spot things he couldn't. He was disappointed slightly when Toothless responded with a quick headshake, but wasn't that shocked. They'd just have to go out a bit further. Trader Johan had been late before, and was sometimes found in the most obscure places, but they always found him in the end.

When they finally found the errant trader, Hiccup and Toothless began to regret even coming out to look for him in the first place.

"It's a parrot!" The excitable words had sounded innocent enough at first, but it wasn't to last. Only a few seconds after Toothless started to pull the boat away from the rocks, (apparently, a thunderdrum had attacked) the parrot opened its mouth.

"Hello!" The sudden words shocked Hiccup.

"Did it just... speak?" he asked, staring at the bird. Johan nodded, looking extremely impressed.

"Yes!" Johan confirmed. "Can copy anything you say. Great, isn't it?"

"Yeah... great..." Hiccup repeated, unconvinced.

"Great! Great!" the parrot chirped happily.

"This is definitely not great." Astrid deadpanned.

"You're telling me? At least you didn't have to spend the last hour having it repeat everything you say! I've had to resort to using Dragonese constantly - apparently, it can't manage that!" Hiccup half-shouted, looking as though he was about to tear his hair out.

'Well, thanks for telling me.' Astrid switched languages, willing to put in the effort of translating everything she said, if only to avoid listening to the beastly creature that Johan had unwittingly unleashed on Berk. She'd only known of its existence for ten minutes, and it was already the bane of her own.

'It's nothing,' Hiccup waved off Astrid's gratitude. 'I'll be on my way now - need to keep track of the thing before the twins get at it.'

Oh, Odin. Astrid hadn't even considered what havoc the twins would be able to wreak if they got their hands on the infernal creature.

"Now say... Tuffnut smells!"

"Tuffnut smells! Tuffnut smells!"

"Hey, no fair! Say... Ruffnut's an idiot!"

"Idiot! Idiot!"

Ruffnut laughed, grinning at her small victory while Tuffnut lamented over the parrot's sudden betrayal. Hiccup heard the exchange before he saw it, and soon he was regretting his decision to let the twins out of his sight, even if it had only been a second.

"Give the parrot back, guys." Hiccup demanded, lacking authority. The twins looked at him oddly.

"Parrot?" Tuffnut asked after a short pause in which he and his sister shared a look, "What's a parrot?"

"That thing that you have. The bird." Hiccup explained shortly, picking it up when the two were too confused to stop them. "I'll be taking that," he commented, "And I'm making Johan take it with him..."