Standard disclaimer: I do not own Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir, and am not affiliated with them in any way. If I were, it would still be Chat Noir, even in the English version. As it is, I have to go with the English version, since that's all I've really seen. Even if it makes my favorite side of the love square slightly awkward.

I am trying to keep this as close to the original series as far as tone goes. But these guys make it hard. Let me know if you think I need to up the rating. I may need to soon anyway.

Issues

"I am a cat, just chillin' out. But in the night, she's all I think about." -Miraculous Theme

Chapter 5: In Which Cats Are a Problem (well, one in particular)

Natalie was just as efficient as ever, responding to Adrien's call and getting to the Tower even before the police. Lila was still alternating between crying that she loved him and screaming that this was all his fault to begin with (both of which he was ignoring at this point). By the time she had quieted down to a sulking silence, all it took was a phone call and a word with the police before she was bodily carried off to an ambulance, probably to check her mental stability or something. He'd have to ask Plagg what the long-term effects were for being akumatized multiple times.

The car ride back to house was quiet. Adrien apologized for turning off his phone, explaining that he had been helping a friend get through some troubles and hadn't wanted to be disturbed. (It was not even untrue.)

His father met them in the foyer, and Adrien didn't even bother looking at the man as he was asked a few brief questions (and no apologies for sending a supervillain after him!). Then Adrien was sent to his room. Gabriel Agreste had an important dinner party. He would talk to his son later.

Hmph. Yeah, right.

At least he didn't have to go this time.

After a long shower (fangirls, ugh!) and a quick supper, he quietly asked Natalie not to disturb him, since he wanted to go to bed early. A few minutes later, Cat Noir was racing across the rooftops of Paris again, the moon high over his shoulder.

He landed on Marinette's balcony quietly, very much aware that her parents might have some strong opinions to her having a boy in a leather catsuit in her room after dark. Still, it didn't stop him as he tapped three times on her hatch.

Her head popped out and she groaned. "Cat Noir, there were three akumas today! THREE. Can't this wait?"

"Well, that depends on how you want to count them," he countered, crouching down so he was closer to her. "I think you only counted as half an akuma. Unless you're counting Lila as one-and-a-half?"

"I can't do numbers right now," she grumbled, rubbing her eyes.

"I won't be long," he promised. He was tired too, but he really didn't want to go back home yet. It was cold, and dark, and there was too much for him to think about if he was left all alone.

Sighing, she let him in. He dropped down to her lounge area, noticing how exhausted she looked. He suppressed a pout. He really would have to be quick. But he wanted—he wanted to just be near her for a while! Her room was a beacon of light and warmth… and comfort. But at the same time, energizing. Weird.

"Do you want a snack?" she asked, looking over her shoulder at him.

"Do you have any more cookies?" he asked hopefully. She nodded and headed downstairs to get them. He took a quick glance at her computer and couldn't help it! Trying to appear innocent, he tapped one of the keys, waking it up. To his disappointment, the screen had a generic background, but he just made a face. He hadn't been homebound for so long without learning a few tricks! He slid into the chair and prepared to work some magic. A few more taps on the keys and—BAM! Previous desktop backgrounds. And… oh my! Cat Noir felt a wide grin spreading on his face. No wonder Plagg had been laughing so hard! Those were some sparkly hearts….

Then Tikki floated down in front of his face, glaring at him in disapproval. He jumped back with a squawk.

"He's corrupted you," she said flatly.

"Aww, don't say that, little lady," he said, trying to charm her with his smile. Her glare narrowed. He pouted. "But I only got a peek before!" he protested.

"Marinette," Tikki called. Cat Noir stood and tried to hush her, in vain. "There's a reason why you shouldn't leave pets unattended!"

"What are you talk—" Marinette was halfway up the stairs when she saw them. "CAT—!" she whisper-screamed, glancing downstairs. He whirled around and whistled innocently, which turned into a (not-so) innocent smile when he saw Marinette glaring at him from the top of her stairs.

"Isn't there a saying about curiosity killing the cat?" she growled, stalking towards him.

"There is," he admitted, hands up in surrender. Still, he couldn't help himself! "But satisfaction brought it back! And you have to admit, I can rock pink sparkles." He grinned at her and gave her a wink.

Marinette stopped mid-stride and blushed bright red. Cat Noir couldn't hold back the laugh bubbling out of him as he fell back into the chair and twirled around to study the picture closer. This was worth more than gold! And it was making her blush! She was so cute when she blushed!

"How long did it take you to make this?" he asked, looking at all the different pictures she had added to the collage. They were all from different magazines, at different times, so it must've taken her awhile to collect them all and— Then she was beside him, clicking out of the window.

"Naughty kitties get no cookies," she said, folding her arms with a huff.

"Aww, don't say that, purrincess," he whined, giving her puppy-dog eyes. "I purromise I'll be good!"

She buried her face in her hand, making a strangled sound caught somewhere between a laugh and a groan. "Cat—"

"Do I at least get some milk?"

"No way!" she said, stomping her foot. "I'm mad at you!"

He held out his arms, inviting her to come sit on his lap. "Can I kiss it better?"

He knew he'd gone too far when he saw her pale and back up instead of blushing more. Or yelling at him. Or making a joke about it. But before she could bolt (and before he could think about what he was doing), he shot forward and wrapped her in a tight hug.

"Sorry, I'm sorry," he muttered frantically. "That was too much. Too far. Please, don't—I…." Inside he cursed himself. He was used to flirting with her and being pushed away no matter what he tried. But now….

"I'm sorry too," Marinette mumbled into his chest. "I just don't know how to act around you anymore." A small, helpless laugh left him.

"Me either," he admitted. This was all so much to take in! Before, no matter what, he'd always known his partner would be there. The teasing didn't mean anything, because the masks would eventually come off. Now… if he pushed too much… would she go away forever? He let her go, just enough to look at her. She was blushing again. Progress. Maybe a step back was a step in the right direction?

"I liked what we had before. Friends forever, right?" he suggested with a smile. She tentatively smiled back. Definite progress. Still, he hated to back down completely… maybe just a little more flirting? "Of course, if you want to be more than friends…."

"Caaaaaat," Marinette whined. He grinned at her, seeing her old humor back.

"All right, all right, I won't push," he said, holding his hands up in surrender. For now…. "But if you won't talk about our future, maybe we should talk about the past?" He suggested, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. "I'm more interested in hearing about this other kiss anyway."

She stared at him for a moment, then sighed, her shoulders slumping in defeat. She had known this was coming.

"Dark Cupid. Last Valentine's Day," she explained, walking past him to sit at the computer he had activated; bringing up the Ladyblog. "You were under his spell and the first thing that came to mind was what we'd just learned in class that day about waking people up from magic spells."

"The prince kissing the princess?" he smiled, leaning on her chair. Then realized- "Hey, that makes you the prince!" Marinette let out a little laugh of her own.

"Well, you were in distress, Damsel Kitty," she smirked up at him and then turned back to the Blog. "I'm surprised you haven't seen this yet. I thought you were a fan."

"Oh, I am, My Lady Prince."

She snorted in laughter. A couple more clicks showed a picture of Ladybug on the ground, kissing the Cat Noir above her. He felt his jaw drop.

"That was real?" he exclaimed, peering closer at the screen. "I thought it was a photoshop Alya did for Valentine's Day!"

"Nope."

"So, what's with those black spots around us?" he asked furrowing his brow. He'd always wondered why Alya had included them in the picture. Shouldn't they be red hearts or something?

"You were… err… trying to use your Cataclysm on me," Marinette admitted.

"I WHAT?" he shouted, jumping back in horror. She shushed him quickly, glancing over at the stairs up to her room. He covered his mouth. Oops. That had been louder than he intended.

"You were under a spell," she reminded him quietly. "You missed, I got you out of it, we defeated the bad guy, pound it. Another day, another akuma."

"Still." He felt weak.

"Marinette?" Tom's voice called. "Is everything all right up there?"

"Yes, Papa, sorry to wake you," Marinette called back. She and Cat Noir shared an "eek" glance and he quickly leapt onto her bed and out the hatch. And not a moment too soon. Her father's head appeared and Marinette spun around in her chair to face him with an innocent smile.

"I was, uh… just looking at… the Ladyblog! And this old photo of Ladybug and Cat Noir kissing!" There was no doubt about it: she was a bad liar. The only thing to really distract him—go for shock value— "It's just, if you look at it right… I mean, are they using tongue?"

Out on her balcony, she heard something crash.

She gave her father another innocent smile. "Must be a stray cat," she said through her teeth. Then she gestured to her computer. "So, what do you think?"

As she thought, her father rubbed his neck in embarrassment. "I think you need to go to bed," he said, barely glancing at the photo and flushing. "And I think any more questions about kissing would be best answered by your mother."

"Ok, Papa, good night," she quickly agreed, waving. Tom retreated down the stairs.

Marinette breathed a sigh of relief and quickly followed Cat Noir's path up the stairs and out to her balcony. Said Cat was standing there, sheepishly holding what was left of one of her favorite potted plants.

"I am so sorry," he said, still flustered. "I'll buy you a new one, I promise."

"It's fine, Cat Noir," she sighed, taking it from him and putting it in the corner where she could clean it up in the morning. "But you really should get going."

"Right," he agreed, dusting off his hands. Then he looked at her and grinned, taking her hand and bringing it up for a kiss. "Sweet dreams, princess."

She couldn't help the blush that spread over her face. "J-j-just go," she stammered, "before you break any more of my pots."

He gave her a bow, but smirked at her as he turned to leave. "You know, technically, that was kind of your fault," he drawled. "Talking about that kiss." She turned redder and prepared to defend herself, but he wiggled his eyebrows at her suggestively. "So, tongue?"

Flustered and defensive, she grabbed the nearest weapon, a spray bottle, and spritzed him. "Not on your life!"

He yelped and quickly retreated, but he was laughing as he left. "Good thing I've got nine!"

"I don't get it, Plagg," Adrien said as he flopped down on his bed. "Before I left I was tired and crabby, and now, even though it's later, I feel…" Excited. Happy. Warm. Light and free. "…good!"

"That's because Ladybug's your other half, kid," Plagg said, happily floating around his wielder's head with an extra-large piece of camembert. "Just being together will make you feel more balanced and energetic. If you ever get injured, stay with her as long as you can. You'll heal faster. And bring lots of camembert. So I heal faster!" He gulped down his cheese and swooped in for another wedge.

Adrien chuckled and threw his arm over his face. "Awesome. Marinette comes with extra perks." Then he realized what he'd just said and blushed. "Not that I—I didn't mean it that way!" he said quickly.

"Su-ure, you didn't," Plagg drawled, grinning mischievously.

"Status buffs! That's what I meant! Like in a game!"

"Uh huh, she's buffing something alright!"

"Plagg!"

The kwami cracked up, cackling wildly as Adrien grabbed a pillow and covered his flushed face. Plagg finally settled down with yet another piece of cheese.

"At least you're not sitting in front of the Blog pining anymore," he said with satisfaction. "You wanted the Lady, you got the Lady. And I helped! I'll take my thank you in brie and camembert, please!" Adrien half-heartedly threw his pillow at his kwami, grinning. It missed.

"You've still got two wheels," he muttered, his mind still focusing on everything he'd learned tonight. Mostly about a certain girl with a tendency to do crazy things…. The night before, he'd stayed up late, pacing and worrying about their reveal and what it meant. He'd resigned himself to the idea that Ladybug really didn't like him and he'd have to work twice as hard to win her affections… and he was determined to win her affections! But now! Everything that had happened today! Pictures, and kisses, and pictures of kisses…!

As well as the other thing that had been in that particular picture…. His elation deflated quickly as reality kicked in. Buzz-kill. He frowned and looked at his hand.

"Plagg," he asked slowly, "what would happen if I did hit somebody with my Cataclysm?"

"Do I even need to answer that, kid?"

Adrien's stomach clenched and he felt sick. So close. He'd been so close to doing it and he hadn't even been in control of himself. What if, next time… he made a fist. No, he couldn't let there be a next time! He sat up quickly.

"Plagg, I will feed you camembert until you pop if you tell me how to stop Hawkmoth from taking me over again," he said.

Plagg looked at him with an eyebrow raised. "You're overthinking it," he said, gulping down another mouthful.

"No, I'm not," Adrien argued. Plagg sighed and rolled his eyes. "It's not funny, Plagg!" he exclaimed. "I could've killed her! And now Hawkmoth's gone after everyone in my class but me! What if he tries to akumatize me next? What if she's not there to stop it? What if—gah!" He held his face in his hands, getting a headache thinking of all the possibilities.

What if he's saved me for last for a reason?

What if I turn into an evil Cat Noir and start hurting people? Or even killing them?

What if I have to fight Ladybug? Ugh, of course I'll have to fight Ladybug!

What if I-?

"Aww geez, the answers are right in front of you, dummy," Plagg said, still hanging onto his cheese and savoring it bit by bit. "You're overthinking it. That's how he gets to you. Just be yourself. Tell jokes instead of getting angry. Think about Ladybug. That always makes you happy, right? Being in love. After all, it's probably what broke her out of it today."

Adrien smiled at that. He couldn't help it. The best thing that had happened all day….

"I'm still trying to process the idea: Marinette had a crush on me!" he laughed. That other picture! With his photos and pink hearts and sparkles all over…! It changed everything! She didn't hate him. She had never hated him! She wasn't still mad at him for some stupid gum prank, or just being polite because she was awesome like that; Marinette couldn't talk to him because she liked him! Like, liked him liked him! Or, at least, she liked him as a model. A fangirl crush. Still, it was a start! Better than nothing!

And Ladybug! Today she had started shouting out everything she thought was good about him! Things he'd never even noticed, or taken for granted; she… she—dared he say it?—she loved him. Nah, too much. He didn't want to read too much into it. But she definitely liked him when she was Ladybug too! Maybe not as much as he wanted, but… the idea was there. Ladybug liked him! He grinned and stretched out on his bed again. Yeah, feeling like this, Hawkmoth wouldn't have a chance of taking him over!

"Ugh. You two are disgusting, you know that?"

"Oh, be quiet. You'll get your cheese."

"Hooray! And the world is beautiful once more!"

That was one thing they could agree on, Adrien thought, still smiling.

Marinette woke up to the sound of her phone ringing. Groaning, she grabbed at it with blurry eyes. That wasn't her alarm! It was her ringtone! Who could possibly be calling her this early?

"He-hello?" she yawned.

"Girl! You have some explaining to do!" Alya screeched in her ear. She sounded far too awake for this hour.

"Alya, I already apologized for skipping out on you yesterday," she groaned. It had been a text, and she had kept it short for obvious reasons, but still….

"Whatever, girl. You're not off the hook just yet! I still want the deets of what you did with Adrien ALL AFTERNOON. But this! I am appalled. I am offended! I should've been the first one you called!"

"What are you talking about?" Marinette asked, confused. If Alya wasn't talking about her disappearance with Adrien yesterday….

"GURL! It's all over the news! I can't believe you didn't tell me! SOMEONE ELSE GOT THE SCOOP ON MY BEST FRIEND AND CAT NOIR! Do you have any idea how embarrassing that is?" Alya yelled.

Marinette felt the blood drain from her face.

"What?"

"Marinette," her father called from downstairs. "If you're awake, I think you need to come down here." He did not sound happy.

"Alya, I gotta go now, bye!" Marinette quickly hung up the phone and scrambled down the stairs.

Her parents were waiting in the living room, standing in front of the TV. Her father turned at her arrival and raised an eyebrow.

"A stray cat, huh?"

Marinette stared at the TV in horror. There, on the news, was a picture of her and Cat Noir on her balcony. It had to have been taken last night! And at just the worst moment too! He was kissing her hand and she was blushing, with a headline proclaiming: CAT NOIR'S SECRET LOVE!

She stammered nervously at her parents' expectant expressions.

"I, uh, I can explain this…."

It was impossible to get out of her front door unnoticed. There were reporters everywhere. Fortunately, her father was a smart man, and instead of threatening everyone with lawsuits, or trying to smuggle her out the back door or something silly like that, he simply called them all together so Marinette could make a statement.

She took a deep breath and tried to appear less nervous. She had addressed the press before, of course, but as Ladybug, not Marinette. Oh, how she wished she could put the mask on for this! But it wouldn't help. This was Marinette's problem, not Ladybug's. At least her father's hand on her shoulder was a solid support. So, she took another deep breath and started the same story she had given him and her mother. Fortunately, she had now practiced this script, so she didn't stutter and blush while saying it anymore.

"My name is Marinette Dupain-Cheng," she began, ignoring the slew of questions that threatened to interrupt her. "Yes, Cat Noir visited me last night, but it was in no way romantic. He came to see me, because yesterday, I was almost akumatized in my class. He was just checking up on me." Inspiration struck her and she added to her story. "Ladybug also came to check on me a bit earlier yesterday, but I guess the photographer didn't catch her," she said, with a little laugh, "or it wasn't sensational enough." The press began muttering amongst themselves. Still feeling a bit resentful of whoever had decided to try to make her out to be some kind of sordid love story, she decided to add a nail to the coffin.

"I know what the picture looks like, but I wish the photographer would've taken another one a few seconds later, when I sprayed him with my squirt bottle and chased him off my balcony!" The reporters began laughing. Marinette only got a few more questions, but they were easy to play off.

Catastrophe over (yup, he was definitely rubbing off on her!), her father patted her back and escorted her to school, even as the press was already dispersing. Probably to go find out who had taken the picture and proclaimed that Cat Noir was having an affair without getting all the facts straight.

Marinette sighed. She'd no doubt have another akuma after her by the end of the day, screaming about how she'd ruined his career. Oh well, Cat Noir owed her one. He'd have to cover her this time. Hopefully he wouldn't flirt too much.

Her father dropped her off in front of the school. Security was pretty tight, since so many celebrity children went to the school, so the reporters couldn't ambush her here. He'd also already threatened to get lawyers involved if she was harassed further, since she was still underage.

"You're sure you'll be all right?" Tom asked worriedly. She gave him a smile.

"Yes, Papa. And I'm sorry I didn't tell you and Mama the truth last night. I didn't want to worry you about being almost akumatized," she said, ducking her head.

"Being akumatized is nothing to be ashamed of," her father said sternly. "It's happened to a lot of people, even adults. I'm just proud you fought him off! And I'll bet Ladybug and Cat Noir were too."

"Yup, they were pretty happy they didn't have to fight another villain yesterday," she laughed. Three in one day was too many. She hoped Hawkmoth had exhausted himself. Like, maybe into a coma? If she was lucky?

Her father finally let her go with a wave goodbye. She smiled until she turned around, only to come face to face with Alya, who looked ready to pounce.

"Deets, girl."

"I'm not dating Cat Noir," Marinette deadpanned.

"Don't say that!" Alya exclaimed, her stern expression melting away in an instant as she threw an arm over Marinette's shoulder. "I already added a whole new section to my blog! The love triangle! The great and powerful Ladybug, who loves the suave, debonair Cat Noir, who falls for the plucky class president!"

"No."

"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh! And then you're in love with Adrien! It's a love square!" Alya squealed, already tapping on her phone.

"Alya! Don't you dare publish that!" Marinette exclaimed, cringing at the implications. My Life: the Soap Opera. Quickly followed by: Alya's seriously going to kill me if she ever finds out our identities.

"And—and! Can you imagine if Adrien was in love with Ladybug? That'd make the whole thing complete!" There was no stopping her.

"Actually, Alya, I can verify that one," Nino said, coming up behind them with a grin. "Adrien's got several Ladybug posters in his room. Apparently, he's a big fan."

"Nino," Marinette moaned, hanging her head as Alya shrieked in happiness, "don't encourage her, please!"

"Ah, don't worry, Marinette," he said. "I'm still rooting for you and Adrien. I didn't figure you'd go for the leather-catsuit type."

She gaped at him as he gave her a mischievous wink. Ugh, at least Adrien already knew about her crush now (but she was still mad at him for that!) and wouldn't find out about it from whatever Alya decided to publish on her blog. (She wasn't quite convinced her friend wasn't just teasing her, but… with Alya, who knew sometimes.)

"Nobody did!" said best friend gushed, shaking the arm still draped over Marinette's shoulders before the girl could protest her innocence again. "But hot damn, is it the talk of the town! So, Marinette, how do you feel about Marichat?"

Marinette blinked at her friend for a few seconds before she realized what she was talking about.

"Oh no, Alya!" she cried, "You gave us a couple name?!"

End Chapter 5

A/N: I just want you guys to know: I hate this chapter. Mostly because it's my favorite ship, and I want it to be perfect, but it won't be perfect because its these two idiots! It's going to be flirting, and puns, and sarcasm galore, but mostly awkward AF. And I love it and I'll happily watch it with popcorn, but writing it when I want them to just be together is… AHHHHH! (I will not write sin. I will not write sin. I lie so bad. I will not write sin… yet.)

Marichat forever!

Adrien argued about that computer scene for a long time, so I understand if some of you think he's OOC. Then Plagg pointed out some other things Cat Noir has done that Adrien probably wouldn't (moonwalking in the park being one of them…), so I don't think I pushed it too far.

Next, Chapter 6: In Which There is Too Much Information (and Marinette hates reporters)