Kage: Hi! Thank you thatgirlwiththeglasses, Anonymous Void, BlackRoseGirl666, and Mew I is Dinosaur for reviewing my story. ^u^ It made me happy to see your reviews.

Thank you Anonymous Void for the Criticism/advice, no, I'm not going to be using lyrics in all of my stories, actually if things go my way my first chapter will be the only one with Lyrics in it. I just thought that it would be confusing without the lyrics~ And I know what you mean, and I'm sorry if in any of my one-shots the characters may seem out of character, I'll try to make sure that they are the opposite.

New record~ I updated again~ It usually takes longer~ ^o^

Well, enjoy!

(A/N: Ah! I'm sorry for making it confusing! I'll fix that, I was a little hesitant about placing the past in Italic's but now that I'm confusing people I'll fix that. Even if most of it is in Italics. XD)

All I Ever Wanted(Airborne Toxic Event): NethCan

Warning: Mentioned: drug abuse, abuse, non-con, and dub-con. Human Au.

"I love you."

Moonlight pored in threw the window and Lars laid on his back staring at the slighter figure besides him. He sighed as the Canadian continued to sleep, it seemed as though he could only say those things when Matthew was sleeping. When he said them to Matthew when he was awake he would gain no response and Matthew would shake as though saying those three words were a taboo.

Turning on his side so he was facing the Canadian he allowed his hand to stroke Matthew's hair, tucking a few strands behind his ear. Matthew breathed out and nuzzled his hand whist shifting closer in his sleep. Lars smiled ever so slightly before he sighed and laid back to stare instead at the ceiling.

"What's wrong?"

"I…I'm afraid…"

"What happened? Are you ok?"

"I feel as though I'm becoming my mother."

He had held Matthew close allowing the blonde to cling to him as he shook. Lars had never met Matthew's mother but, supposedly, the woman was vile; at least that was what Alfred had told him. Always screaming and mad over every little thing. Then, she became addicted to marijuana, crack, lethal drugs that deformed her. She became desperate for the drugs and did things, possibly horrible things but Matthew and Alfred wouldn't say what she had done.

Though he didn't hold it against them, everyone had there secrets. And from what he can tell Matthew wasn't anything like her, and so Lars keeps the shaking crying Canadian in his arms and on his lap, they both, now, sit on the floor in the kitchen. He's cuddling Matthew like he would his sister when she had a nightmare back when they both still got along.

Lars keeps his eyes closed as he rests his chin on the top of Matthew's head and breaths in the Canadian's scent of snow and forest.

"I feel myself turning into my father."

His father was abusive and addicted to weed, every memory Lars has of his father is of him getting high with his friends or of him beating his mother. Lars was a naïve boy at the time and thought it was cool, except for the beating part. Soon, he too, began to use the drug. He abused the drug and got himself addicted to it, from what he could remember Matthew was addicted to it as well. They got each other off of it. It was a hard journey but finally their minds were no longer dependant on the drug and they were free from its web.

Matthew's quiet now and as Lars looks down he realized that the quiet Canadian had fallen asleep. Lars sighs and lifts the Canadian like one would lift a bride and as he takes him to there room Lars muses on how there relationship turned.

There wasn't much of a trust going on anymore and they find there selves wondering if they should lie and pretend that they are happy. Though, with young couples they seem to pretend that there relationship isn't cracked just for the sake of sharing something meant to be so precious with another human being because that's how humans are. They want someone to hold onto, they want someone to hold and love.

Even if it could be platonic.

Lars feels that feeling of frustration begins to bubble in his chest and as his heart races he has to hold in that urge of screaming. It had happened once before and Matthew had been so scared and so worried. Lars spent a whole hour trying to calm down the Canadian.

"I love you."

Even though Matthew reacts in such a way when he hears those three words Lars knows that Matthew wants to hear them. He wants to hear how much Lars loves him. And Lars is more then willing to tell Matthew any little complement the Canadian wants to hear, any little sweet word that Matthew desires. And Lars ponders on the thought of the Canadian no longer being in his life, he shutters because he wants to be with Matthew, forever.

"Lars."

Oh, he remembers that night.

The night.

Matthew's voice had sounded like a ghosts whisper and he's shaking when he spoke Lars's name. Lars had turned to him and looked down at his small body, Matthew was always so quiet and small compared to him.

"What is it Mattie?"

The Dutchman sat besides Matthew his words gentle as he reaches out a hand and strokes Matthew's cheek. Suddenly he's pressed down on the bed with the Canadian sitting on his torso, cheeks flushed and eyes slipping from one side of the room to the other.

"I want to be taken."

Lars stares up at Matthew in surprise, he never thought of Matthew as the kind of person to say that. And with the moonlight shining off Matthew's glasses making them shine in his eyes. Lars can't see Matthew's face, he breathes out and his arms lift to cup the Canadian's face.

Soon Lars is the one on top of Matthew, kissing a pattern down his throat as the Canadian gasps and grabs onto his shirt. Cheeks flushed, eyes wide, face aglow, and panting Lars pauses. This is the face of someone he didn't know. But when Matthew gasps his name he comes to and he presses his lips gently to Matthew's and is answered immediately.

And, he supposes, that was how he knew Matthew loves him.

"I love you."

He says it again to the sleeping Canadian, there is a hitch in Matthew's breath and Lars pulls him in closer. Holding him gently, he feels Matthew place his head on top of his chest, though he must be doing so unconsciously because it still looks as though the Canadian is asleep.

"Lars!"

His name is said with panic and Lars finds himself holding onto a hysterical Matthew. He holds Matthew close and suddenly Matthew is spilling his guts out. Telling, explaining, that when his mother was still alive she…sold him to men for money to feed her marijuana addiction. And after speaking that awful truth he's sobbing and apologizing as though that was his fault. And he stands and hurries to there room, Lars follows immediately wondering what the Canadian was going to do. His heart freezes and his blood runs cold as he watches the Canadian silently sob over his luggage bag, clothes already thrown in carelessly.

He doesn't know when but his arms are around Matthew's waist as he hugs him from behind.

"Don't go."

He whispers that desperately into Matthew's hair and Matthew is surprised because he was certain once Lars knew of his dirty secret he would want nothing to do with him. Instead Lars holds Matthew on there bed for the rest of the day.

"You're all I ever wanted, dear."

Lars mutters that and while Matthew breathes out he makes a soft almost whistles sound. And Lars is tracing small unimportant things onto Matthew's back, Matthew wakes up silently eyes heavy with sleep. He looks up at the Dutchman and smiles.

"Are you going to be here forever?"

Lars is surprised by the question and Matthew falls asleep the smile still painting his face.

"Mattie."

Matthews face was scrunched up and he was tossing and turning in bed making soft cries. Finally Lars is successful in awaking Matthew and he hugs the Canadian close whist stroking his hair. Matthew's crying eyes alight with tears making his eyes sparkle. Lars wants to tell him that he could change him when he's crying at night. Though they knew that was a lie, all Lars could do was try to save Matthew from his dreams of shadowy figures tearing at him, taunting him, and teasing him with there disgusting voices and elongated clawed hands.

Love may be defying.

However, who said love was easily done without trying?

Lars muses on these thoughts and subconsciously allows his fingers to gently run threw Matthew's hair.

"I love you."

Lars says it again, knowing he won't get an answer, and his eyes are beginning to fall heavily and soon, without him knowing, he falls asleep. Matthew opens his eyes and smiles at the Dutchman, his Dutchman; he sighs in content and snuggles into Lars's arms.

"I love you, too."

Kage: Well, thatgirlwiththeglasses, I hope it was what you wanted. I apologize if it was a complete fail. If you have any problems with this one I'll be happy to write you another one! ^w^ Please review, they make me very happy. And a happy author is a healthy one! :P

Jk, Jk, review if you believe I deserve one and please-as I said in my last chapter-polite criticism is appreciated.

Well I'm off to work on the next chapter~

Thank you for reading.