Ignoring his arguments with Miranda and Jacob of the importance in continuing to obtain squad members for the mission against the Collectors, Shepard ordered Joker to set coordinates for the Citadel.
"I just don't understand what the purpose of going to the Zakera Ward is," Miranda said after Shepard declared the decision final.
"There are some... supplies that we need to pick up," Shepard answered evasively. "We would have been able to avoid this trip had I the money for the... supplies when I went to see Anderson. If the Illusive Man didn't insist on giving us funds after recruiting people. I mean, why the hell doesn't he give us the money to put towards the mission instead of as a reward after the mission?"
"We'd have plenty of money if you didn't insist on purchasing asari porn," Miranda muttered under her breath, having ordered EDI to send her any financial transactions using Cerberus credits. As it turned out, Shepard had a thing for the color blue.
"What sort of supplies do we even need?" Jacob asked. "The ship is stocked with everything we could possibly need."
Shepard rubbed the back of his neck. "I didn't necessarily say that what we're going to get is something we 'need'. Nor, I suppose, is it really 'supplies' as more as being a single item."
"You're having us cross the galaxy for a single item? What is it?"
"Well... you'll find out later." Shepard dismissed them before they could get any more information out of him.
Shepard, accompanied by Garrus and Mordin who he hoped wouldn't question his purchase, raced up a flight of stairs to Level 27 of the Zakera Ward and into a nearby store called 'Citadel Souvenirs'. He failed to notice the furrowed brow of the asari running the shop as he accessed the terminal in front of her. Without checking the price, Shepard inserted his credit chit and confirmed the order.
"Shepard, what are you going to do with that thing?" Garrus pondered, looking over the commander's shoulder to see what he bought.
"You don't do anything with a hamster, Garrus," Shepard explained. "It's like with my fish—it's there for display. And I already have a place picked out for it in my cabin so I practically had no choice in getting it."
"Didn't you forget to feed your fish and they died?"
"Didn't you get hit in the face by a freakin' rocket like two days ago? Shouldn't you be, I don't know, in a hospital bed?"
Before Garrus could respond, Shepard turned to the manager of the store and asked, "So do I pick up my space hamster from you, or is it sent to my ship?"
"It'll be at your ship," the asari said in a strangely cold manner, her arms folded in front of her.
"Great. That gives me plenty of time to ask around about whether not the lakes in the Presidium—" Shepard glanced at the terminal screen, still displaying his transaction, and finally noticed the cost of his space hamster. "Wait a second, the last time I was here the hamster would've cost 7,666 credits. It says I paid 9,200. What's with the sudden markup?"
"The price has not been changed since the last time you visited the store, Commander Shepard." She hissed his name like it was the most vile thing she could think of.
Pretending not to notice the third-degree, Shepard leaned on the counter between them and smiled. "Surely you haven't forgotten that I, Commander Shepard, the man who defeated Saren, endorsed your story in order to get a discount? After all, this is my favorite store on the Citadel."
"Is it?" she spat. "From what I've heard, so is Rodam Expeditions, Saronis Applications, and the Sirta Foundation. In the future, Commander Shepard, you should know that endorsements attract more attention when there isn't three other stores right next to each other running the same advertisement."
Shepard frowned. "I... uh... well, this really is my favorite store. Sure, the others can supply me with vital weapons and armor enhancements, upgrades to my tech, or upgraded medi-gel that can potentially save my or one of my squad mate's lives. But there's nowhere else in all of the three levels of the Zakera Ward that I'm allowed to go to that sells me pets and cool models—one of which, by the way, is of the first Normandy, my old ship. I believe some sort of royalties deserve to go my way."
"A portion of the sales on the SSV Normandy model goes to the Alliance," the asari admitted begrudgingly.
"I said my way, not the Alliance's," Shepard clarified. "Anyway, since I have been reinstated as a Spectre since the last time we met, I am once again applicable for the Council employee discount you mentioned last time. So regardless, I believe you owe me a refund."
The asari murmured something in her own language, likely a curse or two directed at the commander, but she did refund him the credits he was due back. Sarcastically thanking her for the friendly business, Shepard and his team left the store.
Later, back on the Normandy, Miranda approached Shepard with a miffed expression on her face as he directed Joker to head out for the prison ship Purgatory. "You made us put our mission to stop the Collectors on hold to acquire a rodent?!"
Shepard gasped, appalled at her words. "Mister Squeakers is not a rodent! He is a hamster, and I like him a hell of a lot more than I like you. If he wore a skin-tight uniform, I wouldn't be able to take my eyes of him either."
"The Illusive Man does not provide you with credits so that you can go out and buy personal items."
"You're half right: the Illusive man doesn't provide me with credits. Most everything I've bought for this mission has come from my own pocket... or rather, the pockets of my dead enemies. He barely gave me enough to afford Mister Squeakers and still have enough for other important things."
Miranda rolled her eyes. "Like Big Bottom Blue Beauties 7?"
She'd hoped that revealing her knowledge of Shepard's private life would've been enough to get to him. Unfortunately, he simply grinned. "If you want to watch my movies, you just need to ask."
Sighing in defeat, Miranda abandoned all hope for the human colonies and walked away from her pervy commanding officer.
A/N: Thanks to Nuclearwullfs, Johnwolf234, anakinpk200, Gairi, dinabubakar5, and thelegendarysupernerd for reviewing since the last update.
So it's been a while. I've been struggling with the newest chapter for my main fic, and I decided to set it aside momentarily before I gave myself worse headaches trying to get it done. I'm sure this chapter probably isn't the greatest I've done for "What Did They Say?", and it doesn't really match up with the tone from the other chapters, but hopefully the simple fact that I updated means something to you.
This story is probably never going to have regular updates; it could be a few days or a few months before Chapter Ten comes out. Regardless, I love your reviews and I appreciate all my readers. Except for Tim. Nobody likes Tim.
... I just know one of you is going to be named Tim because I said that. Oh, well :)