A/n: Hi guys! I'm here with the latest (and last) instalment of Dragons: Oneshots of Berk! (Cue teary farewell and emotional speeches.)
Anyway, sorry this is later than usual - the whole thing deleted itself and I lost like an hour's worth of work, which was also everything that I'd written up to that point... not fun. But I'm done now, so take that irritating laptop crashes!

Ahem. Oh yeah, thanks to everyone who reviewed/favourited/followed/read this, you're great!

EDIT: Dang, forgot to mention that How to Train Your Avengers will be coming out on the 27th, because 27 is the best number and 'cause I can. Well, now you know, so you can keep an eye out for that one.

Now, enjoy the chapter...

Hiccup blinked. One second, he'd been settling down to sleep, just closing his eyes, then a wave of disorientation hit him and he was suddenly standing in what appeared to be the underneath of a tree.

In front of him was a boy, looking about the age Hiccup had been when he'd first met Toothless and staring intently at Hiccup. He was crouched slightly, tensed ready to strike.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, before Hiccup could try to explain. Not that he had anything to explain.

"I..." Hiccup was lost. "I don't know... where am I?"

"Think he's a spy?" a girl over at the edge of the room asked. "Want me to interrogate him?"

"No thanks." the boy said. "Where did you come from?"

Finally, something he knew. "Berk." he said confidently. That elicited strange looks from the trio. What did I say wrong?

"Berk?" the boy repeated, suspicious and surprised at once with his eyebrows raising to merge with his unruly ginger hair.

"Yeah, Berk." Hiccup confirmed, a bit confused. "Best kept secret this side of anywhere? Home to the dragon riders? Um... the chief's Hiccup?"

"No he's not." a different boy, just as scrawny as the other inhabitants of the strange tree-house, said, in a tone which heavily implied that he thought of Hiccup as stupid. "That's Hiccup right there, and he's anything but the chief."

"What?" Hiccup frowned. "No, I'm Hiccup! And I am the chief - who else was going to take over after Stoick died? Snotlout?"

"Yes." the other boy - Hiccup, apparently - deadpanned. It was his turn to be confused."That's who's chief. And Stoick's still alive."

"I watched him die, I think I'd know." Hiccup assured them, voice taking an aggressive tone.

"Really?" the girl asked, slightly concerned now. "Who did it? Was it Alvin, or the witch, or one of the Dragon Furious's dragon army?"

"It was none of those because he didn't die." the other Hiccup snapped. "Who are you really?"

"Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third." Hiccup answered, not sure what to think anymore. "Chief of the Hairy Hooligan tribe, dragon master... who are you?"

"Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third..." there was a definite hint of confusion to the younger boy's voice now, "Not the heir anymore; I got the slave - no, dragon mark. And I'm no dragon master... I can't even get Toothless to put his coat on!"

Hiccup sat down, head in one hand as he tried to think the situation over. "I'd say you were a past version of myself... but that can't be right." He shook his head. "When I was your age I was just meeting Toothless, and we spent all our time in the cove so that no one saw him and tried to kill him..."

"Why would they kill him?" the other Hiccup asked, crouching down so that they were at the same level.

"Because that's what everyone did!" Hiccup explained. "Killed dragons on sight? Thought they were only trying to steal our food and kill our people?"

"Well, we never let something as small as that stop us!" the girl said proudly. "Us Bog-Burglars get the fiercest and most dangerous dragons!"

"Yes, Camicazi." the other Hiccup said tiredly. "We've got the same name, and the same home, but completely different lives..."

"Not completely," Hiccup corrected, "We still have - had - Stoick... do you have Gobber? Valka?"

"Yes and no. Who's Valka?"

"My mother..." Hiccup frowned again. "Have you not met her yet? I didn't until I was twenty, so..."

"What? No! My... my mum's Valhallarama, not Valka. And she might be off questing a lot, but she's still there!"

"Oh... lucky you, then." Hiccup grumbled.

"Yes, so lucky," not-quite-a-younger-Hiccup responded with biting sarcasm, "to be hunted by two armies and have to become the king of the Wilderwest."

"Wilderwest?" Hiccup echoed. "Never heard of it. And never been chased by armies, either... unless you count the times Alvin turned up trying to kidnap me, but that never really worked..."

"You have an Alvin too?" the boy sat on a bed asked - what was his name? Was he supposed to be someone Hiccup knew - in surprise.

"He's probably not dead-set on killing you, is he?" other Hiccup guessed. Hiccup shook his head.

"Well, good for you." the boy on the bed snapped, "You get the prize of not having to hide in a crummy tree so that no one kills you."

"It's not crummy, Fishlegs," Camicazi chided. "it's just a bit cramped. But us Bog-Burglars have no problems with that!"

Fishlegs and Hiccup rolled their eyes. "So... what now?" the ginger boy asked.

"Ooh! The other Hiccup could tell us all about his adventures!" Camicazi suggested happily.

"What makes you think he's had adventures?" Fishlegs asked. "He hasn't said anything about it..."

"But he has a missing leg!" Camicazi enthused. "That must mean he's done some really awesome adventuring!"

"Not really..." Hiccup chuckled. "Actually, Toothless gave me that."

"Toothless couldn't do that." the other Hiccup pointed out. "He doesn't have any teeth."

'Toothless could!' a small voice from beneath Hiccup's clothes protested. A small green dragon popped his head out and flew over to the other version of his human friend. He pretended to take massive bites of the metal leg with his gums.

"That's Toothless?" Hiccup laughed. "Wow, he really doesn't have teeth."

'Toothless is toothless dragon.' the small dragon said proudly, puffing his chest out. 'Toothless is most important thing.'

"Most important thing?" Hiccup looked questioningly over at his counterpart.

"You speak Dragonese?" was the reply. Then, after a few seconds of thought in which the other Hiccup decided that that wasn't actually such a big surprise: "The king's things are these objects that Grimbeard the Ghastly used to own. They're the things you need to become the king of the Wilderwest."

"Ah." Hiccup hummed in thought. "My Toothless is a night fury. People used to call them the 'unholy offspring of lightning and death itself', and he's the fastest dragon on Berk. Also the alpha. So, I suppose being one of the king's things would've been a bit overkill."

The other Hiccup nodded in agreement, not getting to speak as Camicazi butted in: "Why are we talking about boring things? I want to know how you lost your leg!"

"Okay..." Hiccup closed his eyes as he remembered the events. "I'll start at the beginning, on the night of the last dragon raid on Berk..."

'Twas set just before the events of How to Betray a Dragon's Hero, btw.