Chapter 35

In the Batcave the boys were gathered in the studio, behind the glass as they dinked about on various instruments. Spike began strumming "Uptown Girl" by Billy Joel. Instead of the original lyrics he came up with his own as he went along:

Fair-y boy

He'd been prancing in his twinkly world

I bet he'd never had a backstreet boy

I bet he'd never played with tha-at toy

Fairy boy's gonna try, for an backstreet boy

He'd been living in a bear-filled world

And now it's time for a lot less hair

So now he's prowling for a backstreet boy

And when he bends that hairless boy-oy-oy

And when he wakes up hell have burn marks on his thi-i-ighs

He'll see it's pretty bad

And go back to his grizzly bear...

"Dun nuh nuh nuh..." Spike twiddled on for a bit, humming here and there as Nick and David caught their breath from laughing.

Nick plucked a string on his bass, "Now are you the fairy boy? Or the backstreet boy?" Spike glared, "Oh come on, mate... Not like you're hairy enough to be the grizzly!"

David cracked up once more, "Two weeks... Two weeks to get five 'o' clock shadow... you poor pre-pubescent sod..." Both Nick and David were dying of laughter.

Spike straightened and put an un-offended face on, "Well I thought it was rather obvious... Nick's the fairy boy... lusting after men through and through, I'm his guilty pleasure, the backstreet boy, because of my devilish good-looks and hair deficiency... and You David, are the bear that Nick always comes back to... you fucking monkey..."

The laughing came to an abrupt end and they stared at the ground leaving Spike to chuckle now.

"Can't help it if I love you babe..."Nick smiled as he play-flirted with Spike.

Spike gave him a wink, "Later sexy... when were alone..."

"Why were you buried in Buffy's torso earlier?" David suddenly remembered, "And Naked?"

"I'm always naked..." Spike said matter-of-factly

"Love it when you're naked..." Nick said sending Spike a nudge.

Spike stood up and did a little strip tease with his shirt, "Just for you..."

"Wooo!" Nick said, "Marti gra!"

Spike responded by lifting his shirt past his nipples, "Wooo Girls gone wild!" He put on his most feminine voice.

"Jerry Jerry Jerry..." Nick and David both chanted, "Where's the beads!" Nick said suddenly. The three cracked up for a moment and Spike returned to his seat.

"And David said that Spike and I were strange... He never mentioned their activities in private..." Buffy's voice rang through the studio causing the three men to jump simultaneously and turn to see the trio of girls standing in the doorway between sound proof room and control room.

Holly nodded, "I've seen worse... St. Patrick's Day 2008... I found the three of them naked in a man pile on the front lawn... I'm sure they've still recovered no recollection of how they ended up there?"

The men were silent, seemingly to preoccupied with their instruments. Buffy giggled and stepped fully into the room and stood behind Spike, absent-mindedly playing with the hair at the nape of his neck, knowing it to be his weak spot. She leaned down and spoke with a raspy sexy tone into his ear, putting the first step of the girls' secret operation into motion, "The girls and I were talking... and we want to get out of the house later..." She pouted a bit and leaned forward so he could see her jutted lip, "But we realized it would no fun unless we had manly men... shirtless... for our viewing pleasure?" She kissed his neck once, "Would you guys like to come on a walk with us later?"

At this point Holly chimed in, stepping fully into the room, she sat on Nick's lap with her arms wrapped around his neck. "Yes... it's such a lovely day outside... it's wouldn't be any fun with just the girl's..."

David saw the persuasion tactic Buffy and Holly were using and looked towards Willow, hoping the underage girl wouldn't try a move like that on him, "I'm gay..." He said blatantly, not a true fact but it would keep her from his bits.

Willow nodded, "As am I..." She smiled and shrugged while David laughed.

He turned serious, "I'm not really gay then..."

"I figured..." She stepped in and took a seat on a free stool, "I'm... Still gay..." She and David smiled, understandingly to each other, while the other two men were all too easily seduced by their women.

Finally Holly stood up and began her sultry walk from the room, Nick's eye's following her and his tongue lolling on the floor like a cartoon wolf, "We'll let you boy's finish up in here..."

Buffy took here queue, pulling back Spike's head until he was looking at her upside down figure. If there wasn't a guitar in his lap his erection would have easily been noticed, not that he cared much. She leaned down giving him a signature and exquisitely executed Spiderman kiss that left Spike speechless. Then she too turned and began her exit, motioning to Willow as she left.

Willow smiled at David, "See you later then, David."

David nodded his reply, "I'm not gay." He said with a smile.

"I Am," Willow responded, "I'm happy we have this... gay-not-gay relationship."She chuckled and David smiled back giving her a salute as the three girls ascended the stairs.

There was silence in the room as Nick and Spike's blood returned to the correct head, "You alright mates?" David asked quizzically.

Nick gulped and nodded before he picked up his bass and plucked a string. Spike on the other hand was still silent as he watched the door, hoping Buffy would appear again, only naked. David snapped his fingers in Spike's face and he slowly came back, "Blah-duh-blah-blah-blah..." He rambled nonsense for a minute, and then shook his head back into reality, "David needs a girlfriend..." He stated and started strumming his guitar, "So he can have sexy Spiderman kisses and booty rubbins' on his bits like Nick there..."

"So I can be seduced like a puberty ridden school boy is to every bit of cleavage he see's? No... I'm alright for now... I've actually been seriously thinking my sexuality over lately..." Spike and Nick both stopped immediately and turned to the man with the keyboard.

Spike grabbed Nick's hand, and sounded like and emotional mother, "It's finally happening, Nicholas..." Spike's eye's glistened with fake tears, "Our little boy's coming out of the closet! He'll be a great addition to the gay's of the world..."

Nick nodded in agreement, "YMCA..." Is all he said.

David tossed a nearby drum stick between them and their hands broke apart in a fit of chuckles. "No no... I was looking in the mirror the other day and decided that I'm a pretty fucking sexy man... I might go Asexual for a while..."

Spike started laughing uncontrollably hard, sliding from his seat and onto the floor as his guitar fell to the floor. When he caught his breath he pulled himself back into his seat, "Question... can you suck yourself off? If you can... I'd seriously believe you..."

There was a silence from David that answered the question obviously, "Holy shit..." said Nick, the first person to speak after 5 minutes of silence.

Spike looked to the ground and placed his face in his hands, "I knew you were nimble and quick, jack... but not that nimble... I need a beer... Anyone else?"

David raised his hand, as did Nick, "I need about 7 after learning this..." Spike snapped his finger and pointed in response, "Agreed... It's Saturday, Everyone in this room is going to get laid tonight... one way or another... Let's get tanked!"