Sirius felt better than he'd felt in years as he walked out of the backroom of the temple. He'd been healed more completely than anything he'd ever experienced at Hogwarts or since. The nearly constant pain and weariness he'd experienced for the last ten years was gone as if it had never been. The twins had given his hair a trim and shaved his beard before healing him again after another bout of sex. He even had new clothes thanks to Harry's friend Sarah which was awesome because the twins had burned his old rags. He smiled as he saw Harry and Hermione waiting for him on a bench. "I hope I didn't keep you."

Harry shook his head, "Nah, Hermione and I were doing some sword fighting training at the warrior's guild."

"Warrior's guild? Actually, speaking of, where are we?" He pulled his gaze off several naked girls that walked past. "Last I checked there weren't any magical faith healers, at least none of them that could pull off what they pulled off."

Harry grinned at Sirius. "We're in a book."

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "What?"

"One of my magical talents is the ability to jump into books and pull objects out."

Sirius looked over at Hermione. "Okay, he's joking right?"

Hermione shook her head. "He's not. It's really quite impressive. I was quite annoyed when I figured out that book jumping wasn't a skill that just anyone could pick up."

Sirius's eyes widened. "Any book?"

Harry shrugged. "Just about, I've already used up a couple of children's books stealing magical items out of them but yeah, just about any book. Was there any particular book you wanted to jump into?"

Sirius asked, "What about fantasy books with magic that breaks the rules?"

"What rules are you thinking about breaking?" Harry asked curiously.

Sirius asked hopefully, "Can you grab something to bring back the dead?"

Harry winced. "Maybe but that's probably going to char whatever book I pull them out of."

"Char?"

"Meaning that I lose access to the book and anything in it. I'm trying to limit the number of books that I char. Still, I'd char a lot of books if it meant bringing Mum and Dad back… do you know where they're buried?"

Sirius' eyes went wide in surprise. "You don't know?"

Harry scowled in frustration. "I've never been to their graves, the Dursleys always said they were drunks and died in a car crash."

"I'm going to kill them." Sirius clenched his fists as he thought about the Dursleys.

Harry shook his head. "I have something worse in mind for them."

"Worse than death?" Sirius asked dubiously.

"I can stick them in a story where they can't die, where they can't be normal. They'll never bother anyone ever again. That way, Mum can get her own revenge once we bring her back."

Hermione shook her head. "It would be kinder to just kill them."

"Yep, you are your mother's son." Sirius beamed proudly.

"They did their best to ruin my life, maybe trapping them in some hellish book is sinking to their level but I don't care. Turning the other cheek won't make them better people, it won't protect the other children from Dudley. They know too much to try to toss them in prison."

"I can't see that ending well," Sirius replied.

Hermione asked, "Which book are you going to grab resurrection stuff from?"

Harry said, "I saw a Pools of Radiance book at the bookstore the other day, they should have some resurrection items."

"Pools of Radiance?" Sirius asked confused on how that would help.

Hermione said, "Pools of Radiance is sort of like an arcade game. Do you know what those are?"

"Of course, Pac-man is fun," Sirius replied.

"Basically you control a group of fantasy characters, magic users, thieves, clerics and fighters on an adventure in a magical land to defeat a villain."

"The book version of the game should have similar magic shops and resurrection items. That means that I should be able to jump in, buy the scrolls we need then jump out." Harry sighed. "The only problem is how do we disguise the fact that we brought them back from the dead?"

Hermione asked, "What about the Loliblade, we could turn them thirteen."

"And girls, I'm sure that Dad wouldn't appreciate that."

Hermione countered, "Belts of gender swapping, yet another item you can get in Dungeons and Dragons."

"Okay, that still leaves them thirteen," Harry replied.

Sirius rubbed his chin. "That actually isn't a bad idea."

"You can't be serious… okay fine, you're Sirius but that's still crazy."

"Not really, your parents were twenty one when they died. Going back a couple of years isn't really a big deal in the grand scheme of things. We can tell people that they're your older siblings or maybe cousins."

Hermione shrugged. "We can probably claim your mother is your sibling and James a cousin on the Potter side. It's slightly less creepy when they eventually get back together."

Harry asked, "Do you really think they'd want to go back to school?"

Sirius said, "They might, James would enjoy the chance to prank everyone and Lily would enjoy having access to the library again, at least until we copy it. If they get too bored they can always test out of Hogwarts by taking the OWLs and NEWTS again."

Hermione said, "If nothing else then can always using shape changing magic to look like themselves again."

Sirius shook his head. "Polyjuice only lasts an hour or so and transfiguring yourself to look older is problematic."

"Ah no, I grabbed a book on shape shifting out of a book. It lets us take any animal form we want and change our appearance."

Sirius pouted, "You're going to teach me that, right?"

"I was planning on it, don't worry we have all summer to get to know each other." Harry was looking forward to putting his family back together. He wasn't sure he needed a mother or father anymore but an older sister might be fun. Either way, he wanted the chance to get to know his parents.

Sirius glanced around. "Where did Sarah wander off to?"

"She's training at the mage guild…" Hermione trailed off as Sarah walked in. "Scratch that, she's back."

Sarah smiled as she walked over to the group. "What did I miss?"

"A plan to bring Harry's parents back from the dead and how to get away with it," Sirius replied cheerfully.

Sarah grinned as she thought about the book version of Lily she had sex with. "I'm looking forward to it."

Harry nodded. "Anything else we need here or should I bring us back to the Leaky Cauldron?"

Hermione shook her head. "Not that I can think of."

Sirius asked, "How does it work?"

Harry reached out with his magic and pulled them out of the book and back to their room in the Leaky Cauldron. "Like that."

Sirius blinked as he suddenly found himself back in the Leaky Cauldron. "That was strange."

"Let's head to the bookstore." Harry pulled his thief ring off and handed it to Sirius. "Here, wear this and will yourself invisible. It should keep anyone from freaking out about the 'escaped' convict until the Prophet can publish a story about your innocence."

Sirius slipped the ring on then thought about turning invisible. He was a bit surprised when his hand turned translucent. "That's different."

"Yeah, I'll want it back." Harry smirked as he changed his hair color and features a bit to make sure that no one connected him with Harry Potter.

Sarah giggled as she headed for the door. "Let's go, we're wasting daylight."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Sirius wasn't sure what he'd been expecting but walking out of the wizarding world while invisible was remarkably easy. He'd given Harry his ring back once they got out of the wizarding world and into an alley where they wouldn't be seen. It had only taken ten minutes of walking to reach a rather large muggle bookstore. "Now what?"

"Now we head to the fantasy section and I grab what we need to bring my parents back to life," Harry answered as he opened the door to the bookstore for Hermione.

"We'll figure it out." Hermione gave Harry a smile then walked into the bookstore.

Sarah walked in with Sirius as she whispered, "This should work. We're still going to need to know where their bodies are."

Sirius glanced around at the muggles that were ignoring them then dropped his voice to a whisper just to be safe, "They wouldn't have been able to get through the wards to bury them so they would likely be buried in Godric's Hollow. If they aren't there, then we'll check with Minerva."

"I guess that makes sense." Harry headed for the section of the store that contained fantasy books.

Hermione smiled as she looked over the collection of books. "Pools of Radiance."

Sarah grinned a she whispered a spell to help her find it. She giggled as she spotted a couple of books that were glowing to her eyes. "Found it." She walked over and grabbed the book in question and handed it to Harry. "Who wants to come with me and who wants to look for other useful books?" Harry opened the paperback and started flipping through it looking for a spot to jump into the story.

Hermione said, "I think I'll keep reading."

Sarah said, "I'm not letting you jump into a dangerous magical world without me."

Sirius glanced over at Hermione then back at Harry. "I'll help Hermione look for other interesting books."

Harry put his finger on part of the page then set the book in Hermione's hand. "Okay, hopefully we'll be right back." He reached out and grabbed Sarah with his magic then jumped into the book with Sarah after glancing around to make sure no one was paying attention to them.

Sirius shook his head. "I'm not sure I'll ever get used to that."

Hermione smiled as she thought about the first time she'd seen Harry pull the same trick. "It shocked me the first time I saw it. Of course no one had told me about magic so I was especially weirded out."

"How is he really?" Sirius asked curious about his godson's mental health.

"If this crazy plan works, I think he'll be ecstatic. If it doesn't, I'm not sure…" She sighed. "I think he was focusing on other things just in case it didn't work, if he didn't try he couldn't fail and then there was always hope."

Sirius winced. "And I messed that up, didn't I?"

"There are a lot of options, magic, time travel, alternate worlds and copying people… one way or another we'll get them back," Hermione stated firmly.

"How did you meet?"

"In a bookstore then a library."

Sirius asked, "What about Sarah?"

"She was pulled out of a different world using a magic key, a cabinet and a doll. I'm not quite sure how it works, just that it does. She's a lot of fun and she's cute."

Sirius picked up a book at random and absently looked at the back of the book. "I'm not sure where I even fit anymore."

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked.

"I mean, I'm his godfather, I was just the backup guardian but I couldn't even do that right. Harry had to save me, not the other way around like it should have been. I should have been there for him, I would have if I'd just went to the Ministry and explained about the swap in Secret Keepers and taken truth potion before going after Peter." Sirius sighed in frustration. "I can't fix it, I can't make it right. Hell, I hope Harry grabs three scrolls of resurrection, I'm going to need one when Lily and James get back."

"They're not going to kill you," Hermione replied.

"It might make them feel better." Sirius set the book back on the shelf then picked up another book and looked it over.

"Somehow I doubt that." Hermione picked up the Eye of the World. "Magic and fantasy, magical items, magic users, interesting characters and epic adventures. Might be fun to look at." She put the book in her basket and grabbed another book off the shelf.

Sirius held up a picture book with a half naked mermaid next to a young boy in wizard robes and an underwater fantasy city in the background. "What about this one?"

Hermione read the title, "Merlin and His School Field Trip to Atlantis?"

"There's a magic shop and a magic teacher that teaches everyone a spell for surviving underwater."

"What do they sell in the shop?"

"Mermaid rings and the spells required to make them. A spell to make sea monsters or at least baby sea monsters." He opened the book and showed her the picture of the magic shop that showed a bunch of odd items for sale.

Hermione held out her basket. "It's not like we're on a budget. Speaking of, you should grab that pirate book with all the buried treasure." Hermione pointed to the top of the shelf near Sirius.

Sirius closed the book and carefully put it in Hermione's basket. "How much longer do you think it will take Harry and Sarah?" He reached up and grabbed the pirate treasure book and another book labeled Helga and Her Goofy Potions off the shelf and handed them to Hermione.

"Anywhere from a couple of minutes to an hour depending on how close Harry dropped them into the book." Hermione put the treasure book in her basket and opened the children's potion book to a random page. "That's interesting."

"What did you find?"

"A potion that makes a person permanently grow two point five inches if done correctly and slightly more if done incorrectly."

"That's different, I don't remember seeing a potion that would permanently change a person's height before."

Hermione stuck the book in her basket. "Let's check out then we'll head down the street to the adult comic shop and the bagel shop."

"I could use a bite to eat but why adult comics?" Sirius asked.

"It's simple, porn without plot often time results in interesting magical items or spells that you don't find in a more serious novel."

Sirius chuckled. "Are you looking for anything in particular?"

"Not really, I just figured we might be able to pick up some weird magical items before we bring Harry's parents back to life and have someone around to object."

Sirius laughed. "That's a good point. Okay, let's pay for our books then pick up some bagels and naughty books. Here's hoping Lily can't actually watch us from the afterlife."

Hermione blushed as she thought about having sex with the book version of Lily. "Let's hope."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Sarah forced herself to keep her haughty expression on 'her' face as the paranoid shopkeeper looked suspiciously at the galleons and gems she'd set on the counter. "Is there a problem with the gems Lord Bane gave me? Do I need to tell him why his pet project was delayed?"

The shopkeeper gulped slightly as he looked at the two scarred and twisted looking black robed robed figures. "No sir."

"Good because he is not the forgiving sort as you well know."

"It's just that some of the gems look remarkably similar and the belt is cursed…" he trailed off nervously.

Sarah snorted as she gestured at the rupees. "I'm well aware the belt is 'cursed'. Still, when the high wizard hands me a list, a bag of gold and gems and tells me to hurry, I run. Now if I'm late, I'm going to tell him your name and why I was late before he kills me."

"Of course…" The shopkeeper decided that the gems looked and tested as real enough and Bane wasn't someone that any sane person wanted to annoy. 'Maybe they weren't sent by Bane but the gems detect as real. Blah, to hell with it, I'll just make the deal and sell the gems to some stupid adventurer.' He pushed a few of the coins back to the men just on the off chance that they really were sent by Lord Bane, not that anyone would claim otherwise unless they were insane.

Harry had to work to keep the relief off his face as he collected the two resurrection scrolls and 'cursed' belt. He turned and left the shop at a walk trying not to give the shopkeeper a reason to sound the alarm. He activated his invisibility ring once he was outside the shop. "Ready?"

Sarah smiled as she wrapped her arm around Harry. "More than ready, Zhentil Keep sucks."

Harry reached out with his magic and pulled Sarah and himself out of the book. He blinked a couple of times as he found himself in a graveyard with Sirius and Hermione pointing their wands at him. "What the heck?"

Hermione asked in surprise, "Harry?"

Harry held up his hands. "Can you cancel the illusion?"

Sarah snickered as she canceled the illusion they'd used to look like dark magic users. "You're no fun."

"Sorry about that." Harry smiled slightly.

"I almost cursed you," Hermione replied in frustration.

Sirius stared at the scrolls in Harry's hand. "Did you get them?"

"Thankfully the shopkeeper took rupees otherwise it would have taken a decent pile of gold."

Sirius shrugged. "I'd trade my vault if it brought back your parents."

"Same, thankfully we didn't have to." Harry looked down at his parent's graves. "Hi Mum, hi Dad…"

Sarah asked, "If you want I can bring their coffins up without messing up the ground too much."

"Thanks." Harry hadn't been looking forward to this particular part of the plan.

Sarah reached into the earth with her magic and raised the coffins out of the ground.

Everyone watched as the coffins came halfway out of the ground.

Harry handed Hermione a scroll. "You get my Mum and I'll get my Dad."

"If you're sure?" Hermione asked hesitantly.

"I'm sure. You got the same scroll use training I did at the thieves' guild."

Sirius watched nervously as Harry and his friend started speaking in a strange unfamiliar language. The words seem to blur together and get lost but he could feel the magic released as the scrolls caught fire and turned to ash. He asked nervously, "Did it work?"

Any reply Harry might have made was cut off as both of the coffins opened.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Lily sat up and looked around the graveyard. "You have some explaining to do Sirius."

James coughed as he pulled himself out of his coffin. "I need a shower, this coffin is worse than that one time we hexed Snivellus with that explosive diarrhea curse Lily found."

"James?" Sirius felt his tears coming down his eyes. He hadn't really let himself believe that he'd see his friends again this side of Death's door.

James snorted as he glanced around. "I'd make a joke about zombies but I need a shower way too much."

Lily had to agree about the shower bit. "Sirius Orion Black, what type of dark magic did you use to drag us back to the land of the living?"

Sirius gulped then pointed at Harry. "Harry did it."

"Hey, it was your idea," Harry replied quickly.

Lily glanced back and forth between Sirius and Harry then over at Hermione and Sarah. "In that case, I guess I'll forgive you. Who are the two lovely ladies?"

Harry gestured toward Hermione then Sarah. "Hermione Granger and Sarah."

Sirius supplied helpfully, "His girlfriends."

"I'm not sure that's helpful," Harry replied nervously.

"Was I supposed to be?" Sirius smirked.

James raised an eyebrow. "You have two girlfriends?"

Sarah snickered. "He's awesome and she's adorable."

Hermione gave Harry a one armed hug. "He's my best friend."

"That's the best way to start a relationship." Lily glanced down at her dress with a look of distaste. "Okay, the rest of this can wait until we've had a shower and a change of clothes."

Sirius muttered, "There might be a bit of a problem returning home."

James sighed. "We know, the place is wrecked."

"You know?"

"Halloween is a holiday for the dead, one where we stop running around having adventures and sit around and watch the living."

Harry winced. "You're not mad that we brought you back are you?"

Lily shook her head. "Of course not, we had a choice, we could have said no. Death said to go have some fun and live it up for a while so here we are."

Hermione blinked in surprise. "Death said that?"

"Death isn't what most people think of her as, she's not a jailor, she doesn't care if people avoid death, well for the most part. She's a lover, a friend and most importantly a guide depending on what she needs to be."

"She's also rather cute," James admitted.

Lily smiled as she playfully shook her finger at James. "I don't need a wand to hex you."

"I'll behave, at least for a while."

Hermione spoke up, "We still have the Leaky Cauldron room rented for a couple of hours and Harry can grab some clothes for them while they get cleaned up."

James glanced at Lily. "What do you think?"

"I think a shower sounds great. Once we're done with that, Sirius can tell me how the hell Harry ended up with the Dursleys. I just got bits and pieces of things on Halloween but what I saw was bad enough. I'm going to have words with my sister." Lily felt like hexing her sister until she resembled the monster within.

"It's a bit of a long story…" Sirius wasn't looking forward to explaining how things had gone so very wrong.

Lily snorted. "You'll have plenty of time to explain things while we're fixing the cottage."

Sarah gestured toward the coffins and used a touch of magic to flip the lids closed. Let's put these back where they're supposed to go." She lowered her hands toward the ground as she used her magic to sink the coffins back to where they were supposed to be. "There."

Hermione said, "If I didn't know better, I'd say nothing happened here for years."

Lily asked, "Speaking of, any ideas what we're going to tell people?"

Harry laughed. "I've got several ideas."

0o0o0o0

Lily felt almost human again after her very long and hot shower and a couple of dozen spells to deal with her wild hair, dirty teeth and overgrown nails. She wasn't sure what to think of the red silk panties and silk pajamas that Hermione had given her to wear but they were lots better than the dress she'd been buried in. She stepped out of the bathroom into the hotel room where James was entertaining Harry, Hermione and Sarah with stories of their time at Hogwarts. "Shower's free."

James turned to look at Lily, "You look lovely. I'd kiss you but I stink."

"Yes you do. There are clothes on the counter for you dear." Lily gestured toward the bathroom. "Go, get clean."

"I guess we'll finish the story latter." James blew Lily a kiss before he walked into the bathroom and shut the door behind him.

Lily turned her attention to Sirius. "What the hell happened?"

"Peter sold you out, I went after him in a blind rage and he got the drop on me, it was stupid and insane, almost as stupid as not having your wands on you while in hiding."

Hermione asked, "Why not just be your own secret keeper?"

"Ah, if it was just the house then we could have, we should have done it that way." Lily sighed. "It was an example of us being too smart for our own good, we figured it was better to just hide ourselves. Looking back at it, I'm not sure what we were thinking."

Sirius said, "After that I went to prison without a trial and Harry was stuck with the Dursleys who spent the next ten years trying to beat the magic out of him."

Lily stepped forward and pulled Harry into a hug. "I don't care if she's my sister, I'm going to kill her and her whale of a husband."

Harry hugged his mother back. "Thanks for the thought but I've got a better idea."

"Oh?" Lily let him go as she looked at his dazzling green eyes.

"I'm going to trap them in a book."

"What do you mean?" Lily asked curiously.

"I mean I can reach into books with magic."

Sirius piped up, "Which means he can stick them on a hellish Gillian's Island."

Lily looked over at Sirius. "Did you put him up to this?"

Sirius pouted. "Ye of little faith, he's the one that pulled resurrection scrolls out of a book. How else do you think you're here."

"A new discovery? I wasn't sure. Speaking of using magic to bring us back from the dead, are there any side effects we should be aware of?"

"Not with the version of the spell we used."

Harry said, "That was certainly a consideration and why we went with the more expensive version of the scrolls. Speaking of, I'd rather not have to hide for the rest of my life so we probably shouldn't tell anyone that you're both back from the dead."

Lily raised her eyebrows. "If you think I'm just going to hide away again, you're sadly mistaken young man."

Sirius piped up, "It just requires you to become a thirteen year old girl again."

"Right, okay, let's hear the insanity." Lily looked down her nose at Sirius.

"Well, we've got a magical artifact that can reduce a person's age to thirteen. You stay the same age even after you've taken the bracelet off. Thus, poof you're the daughter that no one knew you had."

Lily rubbed her face. "That's insane and even if I was willing to do it, no one is that stupid."

Sirius smirked. "We live in the wizarding world. Common sense isn't that common."

"Okay, what about James, as much fun as turning him into a girl would be, I don't think he'd want to stay that way," Lily replied with amusement.

Sarah piped up, "That's what the 'cursed' belt of gender swapping is for."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Remind me again how come you boys were never expelled?"

Sirius smirked. "Because we had Remus, oh right, him… we should probably grab him and tell him you're back."

Lily asked, "How long have you been out of prison?"

"A couple of days, there was the trial then the whorehouse…" Sirius trailed off as he realized what he just said. "Can we forgot I said that?"

"No, are you corrupting my son?" Lily asked suspiciously.

"He's the one that brought me there."

Lily blinked. "Explain that again?"

Harry pipped up, "It's a temple of healing, they used magic to heal the damage the prison left on his mind and body."

"So there weren't girls?"

Sarah piped up, "Oh no, there were plenty, it's a temple to the goddess of sex on that world."

Sirius mock pouted. "He's corrupting me."

"Are you corrupting…" Lily shook her head. "Yeah, just no, it doesn't work that way Sirius even if it does. You're supposed to be the responsible one."

"Since when have I ever been accused of being responsible?"

James walked out of the bathroom wearing slacks and a silk shirt. "That would have been Remus's job. Speaking of, do you have any idea where he is?"

"That was on the list," Sirius replied.

Hermione said, "We've got a magic mirror that should let us know where he is."

Sirius blinked in surprise, "You have a magic mirror that can find people and this is the first I'm hearing about it?"

"I was going to mention it eventually." Hermione pulled the mirror out of her bag and handed it to Sirius. "Just say the person's name."

"Remus." Sirius looked into the mirror and saw a shabbily dressed man curled up in a basement with a threadbare blanket pulled over him. "When is the full moon?"

Sarah said, "Tonight."

James sighed. "Damn, I don't suppose you have a cure for being a werewolf in your box of tricks?"

Harry smiled. "Maybe. If we put the Loliblade on him before the full moon that should keep him human, more or less at least."

"Loliblade?" James asked curiously.

"The artifact that turns its user into a thirteen year old girl and gives them armor while they're wearing it. It should be able to keep Remus from being a wolf or at least that's the idea."

James smirked. "Let me get this straight, you're going to permanently turn him into a girl to cure his lycanthropy even though you're not sure it will actually work? Does that about sum it up?"

"The other option is the temple but this way is more amusing." Sirius grinned.

Lily shook her head. "Boys."

Sarah piped up, "I'm sorry but Lily and James need new identities. If we tell people that Remus was watching over Harry's sister, Lilyanne Potter until Harry started school then we have an ironclad reason she wasn't seen or known about before now. If Remus wants to get a new identity then "Remus" died from complications and the newly released Sirius Black took everyone in."

James asked, "And what about me? If you make Lily a Potter..."

"You're obviously a second or maybe even third cousin," Harry suggested.

Sirius piped up, "Or if you really want to horrify people, you can be twins, obviously not identical."

James paused as he considered the situation they were in then smirked. "Okay, twins it is."

Lily shook her head. "Cousins, second or third or I'll look for a new girlfriend."

Hermione asked, "Just like that? You're going to do it?"

James laughed. "Just think of the trouble we can cause as third years."

Lily shook her head. "This would be better if you could pass as Harry's twin."

Sarah laughed. "Actually, we've got a shapeshifting spell book and some youth potions, pulling off eleven shouldn't be a big deal."

Lily said, "We should probably collect Remus before we turn ourselves into eleven year olds or he'll never believe us."

Sirius smirked as he looked down at the mirror one last time. "This is going to be fun." He handed Harry the mirror back then apparated to where Remus was.

Lily shook her head. "This can't end well."

James looked at the mirror. "Let me see that a minute, I want to know where Peter is."

Harry handed James the mirror.

"Peter Pettigrew." James wasn't all that surprised to see his 'ex-friend' in rat form in what was obviously a magical house. Sadly other than the red haired youth, there weren't any details that stood out that would let him find him and he didn't want to try apparating into an unknown wizard's house through whatever wards might be there. "At least we know he's alive."

Lily looked at Harry, "I want to hear more about your ability with books and what you're planning on doing to the Dursleys. Mostly because I want the last thing my sister sees in this world to be me."

"It started…" Harry went on to explain his abilities and got them up to speed, or at least as up to speed as the Grangers were, which is to say, he didn't mention anything about having sex with Hermione or Sarah or anything overly suspect.

0o0o0o0o0

Remus stared at Lily and James in shock. When Sirius had told him there was something he had to see this wasn't what he'd been expecting. He was just glad that he's heard that Sirius wasn't guilty from McGonagall otherwise things might have gotten interesting. "How?"

Lily said as 'innocently' as she could which wasn't very, "Magic."

James said, "Harry brought us back."

Remus turned to stare at Harry. "How?"

"Scrolls of resurrection form a different world."

"How do I know this isn't some horrible trick?"

"I'll show you Prongs." James shifted into his stag form.

Remus felt tears coming down his face. "It's real, they're real…"

Sirius snorted. "I'm a prankster, I'm not an arse Moony, I wouldn't joke about this."

James turned back to his human form. "Enough proof?"

"Yes… now what?"

Sarah asked, "How would you like to be cured of your lycanthropy?"

Remus turned and stared at Sarah. "That's not possible."

"Bringing back the dead shouldn't be possible either," Lily replied.

"But here we are." James grinned at Remus.

"What would I have to do?" Remus looked at Sarah.

"You basically wear a magical artifact and when the change comes you'll hopefully remain a human. If that doesn't work, we'll visit a magical temple that can cure curses. If that doesn't work then I know of a world that has a cure but it's an annoying quest line."

Lily spoke up, "You should tell him about the side effects."

"Side effects?" Remus asked.

"The artifact will turn you into a thirteen year old girl."

"Are you s-" Remus glanced at Sirius, "joking?"

Harry said, "We have another magical item that can flip your gender so you won't be stuck as a girl."

"Just thirteen?" Remus asked.

Sirius smirked. "I was thinking eleven actually. We take a couple of youth potions that knock off a year each then we start Hogwarts with Harry and Hermione. One of the books they have should let us learn to shapechange which means that we'll be able to look like our adult selves if we want to."

"You actually want to go back to school?" Remus asked in disbelief.

"I had a lot of fun there, mostly because it wasn't home and I had you guys." Sirius rubbed his hands together. "Just think about the chaos we'll be able to cause."

Remus laughed as he pictured Snape's face when he saw them. "Okay."

Lily raised her eyebrows. "Okay?"

"You and James are going to need alternate identities. Besides, I wasn't around for Harry for the last ten years, maybe this will help make up for that glaring oversight."

Lily asked, "Why weren't you around?"

"I was pretty messed up after your deaths and Sirius was tossed in jail. Living with a werewolf is no place for a child. Besides, Dumbledore assured me that he'd be safe so I went wandering."

Harry snorted. "I wouldn't call living with the Dursleys safe."

Remus's eyes widened. "He didn't!"

"My aunt used to rant about how I was left on her doorstep in the middle of the night. I'm not sure if that's true as she also told me that my parents were drunks but for all I know it might be."

Lily said, "We've got a couple of hours until you change which means that we have enough time to deal with the Dursleys then get to a safe location for your change in case Harry's plan has complications."

Remus asked, "What are you going to do to your sister?"

"Get some answers." Lily stated grimly.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Petunia Dursley opened the door then stared in shock at the group standing on the front porch. "You're dead! They told me you were dead!"

Lily snorted. "You hit my son. You let your whale of a husband hit my son and his idiot cousin chase him like a wild animal."

"I didn't want him to be like you!" Petunia turned her glare on Harry. "Freak."

Lily sighed as she looked at her hate filled sister. "There was a time when you wanted magic Petunia. What the hell happened?"

"Mum and Dad always took your side. They were so proud of you and your freakish ways. I just wanted, they didn't see me… it was always Lily this and Lily that then you went away-"

Vernon called out, "Who is at the door?"

James smiled grimly before calling out, "A bunch of wizards!"

Vernon stalked to the door. "Now see here! I won't have any of that freakishness in my house."

Sirius flicked his wand and stunned the large oaf. "None of that."

Petunia stared in horror at Sirius. "What did you do?"

"I just knocked him out before he said something I'd have to kill him for."

Petunia gulped. "What are you going to do?"

Lily said, "We're going to come inside and you're going to answer a few questions for me. After that, we'll see."

"And if I don't invite you in?"

"I wasn't asking, move." Lily glared at her sister, half hoping she'd give her a reason to do something drastic.

Petunia sighed in defeat as she stepped back so that Lily and the others could enter the house.

Lily stepped inside the overly neat house. "You're going to start with the night my son ended up here and then explain what the hell you were thinking."

Petunia glanced at Vernon then walked into the living room. "It started when we found him in a basket on our doorstep wrapped in a curiously warm blanket."

"He was left on your doorstep?"

"By Albus Dumbledore, he left a letter explaining that if we took him, he could set up wards that would keep us safe from witches and wizards, that we wouldn't have to see any until the boy started Hogwarts. I'd hoped if he didn't start Hogwarts that we wouldn't have to ever deal with any freaks."

Harry glared at Petunia. "Why didn't you just refuse to take me?"

"Because you were all I had left of Lily."

"Then why were you such a bitch?" Harry demanded.

"Because I hate her... and love her and she was my little sister." Petunia glared at Lily. "Then you ran off to that school and left me alone. You'd come back with frog spawn and weirder things and by the time you caught back up with current events and fashions you'd leave again and I was left remembering that I had no magic, nothing. You weren't there, all they talked about was your magic, your stupid school. The school I had no place in! I wanted to fix that, maybe..." Petunia threw up her hands. "I shouldn't have taken him. I knew I shouldn't have. I was so angry and Vernon didn't like anything weird or out of the ordinary. I tried to stand up for you when the accidental magic started but he said he'd have none of it under his roof and I could leave if I was going to put up with it. For what it's worth I'm sorry…"

Harry sighed as he realized that he actually felt sorry for his aunt. 'Well fuck, tossing them to the same cursed island just seems needlessly cruel.' Harry asked, "Do you still have the letter that Dumbledore left me with?"

"I have it and the other letters he sent over the years trying to check up on you. What happens now?"

Lily said, "You're going to take a trip somewhere you'll never bother me again. You're also going to update your will leaving the house to Harry."

"What about Dudley?"

Harry said, "That depends on how honest you are Petunia. If you answer the rest of our questions we'll merely send him to a military boot camp for troubled boys. If you're not helpful then I'll send him to hell. He's tormented me for as long as I can remember. I don't care if he lives or dies or makes something of his life. Either way, he's going to do it far away from me. Where is he? I have a couple of questions for him about his gang."

Petunia glanced toward the stairs. "He's out."

Sarah smirked as she headed toward the stairs. "I'll get him. I've got some questions for him."

"Please don't hurt him." Petunia begged.

Lily glared at her sister. "I'm not you Petunia. Now start explaining."

Words started pouring from Petunia's mouth, good times and bad, her twisted side of the story.

Harry half listened to his aunt's story as he walked over to where Vernon was sprawled on the floor unconscious. It felt strange looking at the man that had caused him years of grief and fear. Part of him wanted to kick the fat man in the ribs and head until he was sure he was dead. A small part that he ignored whispered that it wasn't right to sink to Vernon's level. While that was true there was a difference between not turning into a monster and continually turning the other cheek while someone beat you to death. Mostly though it was the realization that death was a release that stayed his hand. He wanted Vernon to suffer, to live out the rest of his life in a living hell, not have a few moments of pain then get to lounge around in an afterlife being a monster. "I can't believe I was too scared of this tub of lard to go to the police or leave before I found my magic."

Hermione walked over and hugged him from behind. "He can't hurt you anymore."

"I know, that doesn't change the fact that I didn't stop him, that I didn't stick rat poison in his food, that I didn't strangle him in his sleep or blow his brains out or any of a hundred other paths I could have taken. Just going to the police would have helped."

"Why didn't you?"

"I tried to tell various teachers and the nurse at school. But they only rarely hit me, so it was just kids playing around or that's what one particularly annoying teacher said."

"You're safe now." Hermione rested her chin on Harry's shoulder.

"I know." Harry glared at Vernon. "I was going to drop him on a magical version of Gilligan's Island for criminals but that was before I learned that he was going to kick my aunt out on the street for trying to be a decent human being."

Hermione asked, "What are you going to do with him?"

"I'm going to let Mum finish talking to Petunia then I'm going to have someone memory charm Petunia so that she forgets about the Dursleys and the last decade and change. Then we're going to test the Loliblade on her and send her into a book where she can learn magic."

"Why?"

"Because it wasn't fair that she couldn't learn magic. Maybe she still would have ended up a terrible person if she'd gone off to Hogwarts with Mum but she might not have. Either way, she's family and I can give her a second chance."

"You're the most kind hearted person I know Harry." Hermione gave him a soft squeeze on his arm.

"You say that now." Harry smiled grimly as he pulled out one the tentacle rape hentai books that Sarah seemed to find amusing for some reason he couldn't understand out. "I'm going to send him into Bubba's cell."

Hermione shivered slightly as she looked at the gore filled picture book. She whispered, "Wasn't Bubba the tentacle demon that was tossed into the magical jail for buggering everyone in the Vatican to death?"

"That's the one." Harry replied happily as he reached out and hauled Vernon and himself into the book.