I own nothing. Warning, may contain Out of Character moments.
Today the overcast was weaker, with more of the blue-sky peeking through the grey blanket. It wasn't much, but Bakugou could at least be glad for the little sunlight that'll occasionally come in through the windows. Really brightens things up… Especially when 1A was all silent and in deep thought, with Tsuyu tiredly going around and sweeping the floor again. It was depressing how no one was conversing, what happened to the bonds they all shared? Well there was some exceptions as Mineta, Kirishima, Kouda, and Aoyama were sticking together, but didn't bother anyone else as to not disturb their thoughts.
Then there was the fact that Uraraka and Eri were holed up in his room again… Things are not going to get better if people can't talk about their damn feelings. So, Bakugou decided it was time for an intervention.
"Hey frog chick, go get round face and the shrimp. They can't stay cooped up in Deku's room forever and mope about by themselves. Weren't we all a God damn team? Shouldn't we all be grieving together?"
"Hmmm… Yes, we should… I'll be right back." Tsuyu then set her broom against the wall and proceeded to walk to the stairs. The others of 1A stared at Bakugou for making such a call, which earned them a dirty look from the explosive Hero.
"The Hell you looking at? You know that shit's true."
"We know. But you bringing people together and not tearing them apart is always a strange sight."
Todoroki began making these vague hand gestures to bolster his words. It wasn't very effective at helping his idea, but everyone really didn't need it to understand what he meant. Bakugou and being friendly was a rare sight, a sign that things were starting to get better.
"Fuck you Two Face!"
"I don't know man… You've been more involved with us lately…"
"Get off my back imp shit!"
"Hey, if Mineta could see it then it's really obvious."
Before the explosive Hero could bite back against Kyouka, Tsuyu returned with Uraraka and Eri in tow. They were looking slightly better, not by much but livelier than before, though that wasn't the point of interest. What was were the fourteen notebooks the two were carrying in their arms. One of them looked burned, signaling to the rest on what those books were.
"Ochako-chan, aren't those…?"
"They are, Mina-chan… Deku-kun's Hero notes…"
Both the surrogate Mother and Daughter laid out the fourteen notebooks on the table, everyone gathering around it. From the first book and its crayon scrawled cover, to the last with its orderly penmanship, these were the vessels that held all of Midoriya's observations, ideas, hopes, and dreams. Proof that he never stopped thinking about the kind of person he wanted to be…
A Hero.
"Papa was always writing in these books when he wasn't busy with schoolwork or playing with me… I never really looked inside and Papa always says it's just boring Hero stuff… But now that he's… G-Gone… I want to look through it with everyone…"
It almost broke their hearts how the one horned girl paused before admitting that Midoriya wasn't coming back. Eri had to clutch onto Uraraka's hand before she could finish her thoughts, barely containing her desire to break down. 1A looked sadly at her as she wiped away at the tears that did manage to leak through before their eyes turned to their gravity girl. The area around her eyes looked red and puffy as her body tried its best to look well, but ended up looking rigid.
Uraraka at least sounded better, with her fatigue not being as intense as the one two days prior.
"I don't know if Deku-kun would mind… To be honest, I really don't want to go through something so personal…"
"Uraraka, believe me when I say this, but Midoriya would always be willing to share his notes. I mean, these idiots keep asking him for study material whenever Yaoyorozu or Iida wasn't available." Todoroki then proceeded to point at both Mina and Kaminari, who at first looked offended at the statement and then just accepted it… Seeing that it was completely true. Though what came next was just depressing…
"Not that we could do that anymore… Guess I have to start going at it alone…" Kirishima gently put his firm hand on Mina's shoulder, giving her slow pats as she gazed down at the table of books. They all entered a somber mood, muting out whatever energy they all had just moments ago. This wave of sorrow wasn't as intense, but it still felt over bearing…
Kaminari however, instead of slipping into a wistful state like his friends, he opted to pick up the first of Midoriya's Hero notes instead. Questionable glares went to the human stun gun over this action, but none was as intense as Kyouka's.
"What are you doing Charge-Dolt?"
"Ernest Hemingway said that 'Every man's life ends the same way. It is only the details of how he lived and how he died that distinguish one man from another'. So with that, I think Todoroki's right about how Midoriya would want us to read these… In fact, he'd be over the moon and would go into a mumble storm over the Heroes inside… He was a nice guy who wrote down every story and his own in these books... And I feel it would be wrong if we went to honor him without fully learning and understanding who he was… But that's just me, what about you guys?"
It always surprised the class that their friend, dead last in academics, knew a whole lot about American novelists and was surprisingly wise at times. This was only another nail in the long-sealed coffin that, while Kaminari was an idiot, he still has his days to shine. So looking at the books laid upon the table, they each began thinking about the electric Heroes words. Yaoyorozu was the first to speak up again…
"There was a German novelist who once said, 'Without words, without writing and without books there would be no history, there could be no concept of humanity'. Meaning that writing helps Humanity construct a unique identity and without it, we'd be nothing. And our history that would've been lost could now transcend the annals of time and become part of something greater… All because someone was dedicated enough to record it… Kaminari-san is correct, we'd be squandering Midoriya-san's memory by not reading these books. This act will give all the knowledge he accumulated validation and in turn, it'll acknowledge that he existed."
"I whole heartedly agree. He gave it his all for these books and was always ready to offer us his wisdom… So let's not waste the blood, sweat, and tears he put into writing these and read them." Iida said. There was a hum of agreement before all eyes turned to Uraraka for the final input, seeing that she was the closest to Midoriya thanks to Eri. She gave a slow nod before sitting down, breathing out a sigh and mumbling something so inaudible that even Kyouka couldn't hear her. It was tense, but as luck would have it, Kaminari diffused it in the only way he knows how.
Stupidly.
"Hey, I know! Let's go through the first one together! Gather around boys and girls, Grandpa Denki is about to tell you all the secrets of Heroes penned by the greatest man I ever knew! It's chock full of things a growing kid needs to become a super cool, super strong, and super smart Hero!"
"Uncle Denki, if you're Grandpa, is Aunt Kyou Grandma?" Eri's innocent, out of the blue question nearly caused a cackling outburst from the class, though one could still hear the laughter being held back from several throats. But while it didn't completely go through, this was their first good hearted laugh in a long while. Kyouka, despite being redder than Kirishima's hair, just began frantically waving her hand at Kaminari to move on… Whilst making herself as small as she humanly could.
"Alright, alright guys, leave the Missus alone and let's get our feet wet! Here we go, Midoriya's Hero Analysis for the Future, book one!"
From that point on, time didn't exist. As the class bear witness to the many pages that the One True Hero scribbled on, they could feel his voice come to life. The first book created a starry-eyed child who they could feel bounce around as he watched Heroes duke it out with Villains on the TV. The memory even appeared as a phantom in their mind's eye, with 1A noting how adorable the young Hero in Green was.
"All Might is so cool! No one gets hurt when he fights the bad guys cause they can't stop looking at him! When All Might laughs, it always makes them mad before he hits them and wins! Like a man who fights cow! Making baddies very mad means easy win."
While most of these crayon-written notes were extremely crude, as expected for a four-year-old, they contained very interesting points on how Heroes engage Villains in battle. No one was sure which Villain Midoriya was referring to, but what he noted down as a child gave proof that this was how his strategic mind was developed. Drawing attention away from civilians with taunts minimizes casualties while aggravating the opposition into predictability, which was then exploited.
When 1A was his age, their Quirks had already manifested and they began experimenting with it soon after. But since Midoriya was born Quirkless, he didn't have that chance so he turned his mind to something else. Towards Quirk Study and Combat Analysis. And this pattern persisted from cover to cover, most likely continuing in the next book and the one after that. These diligently taken notes, and his undying dream, was all Midoriya had when it came to Heroics. It was heartbreaking…
Though that did absolutely nothing to stop 1A from busting a gut when they saw a tidbit involving All Might on the very last page. Circled in red crayon and pointing to the Hero's abs and chest, a young Midoriya wrote this impossible note in big, bold, black letters…
"MASCLES BIG MACHO!"
"He did not write that!" Uraraka nearly choked when Kaminari read that, as did everyone else in the room. Even Bakugou! No matter how stoic or unflinching they may be, the thought of their adorable Cinnamon Roll writing that down is absolutely absurd. Even more so that the boy should be too young to know anything about muscle culture.
"I can't… I just can't… What the heck Midori?" Mina's giggles couldn't subside as Kaminari closed the book and laid it back down on the table. There shouldn't be anything special about this crayon scribbled mess… But with Midoriya's charm rubbed all over it, this reading became a real treat for all of them. Bakugou stared at the notebooks, especially the one he burnt, and thought back… The nerd really was attached to them, the effort he spent on them now evident on the explosive Hero.
"Even when he's gone, Midoriya's still surprising us…" Mineta commented.
"Yeah… It kind of sucks we didn't meet him before UA… We could've had so much fun…" Tooru sighed. The girl tucked in her invisible legs, pressing them against her chest as she rested her head against Ojiro. The tailed boy nodded as Tokoyami grabbed the next book in the series, opening it up to the first page. Reading the notes scribbled in more crayon, another phantom of child Midoriya appeared and they heard his excited voice reading the scribbles.
And this trend continued as they proceeded through each of the books. But one notable difference as they moved towards the last one was the voice of Midoriya, changing from starry eyed child to the hopeful analytic they knew him for. 1A didn't know when, but they all could see all of Midoriya's ghost wandering about the common room. Seeing each one of them pore so much passion and attention into their respective books was heartwarming…
Yet completely bittersweet since they wouldn't hear anymore beyond the fourteenth…
"Using my legs for Full Cowl has been getting trickier than I had thought… Though I managed to get through recent incidents just fine, my movements are still predictable… Not to mention for the fact that I keep failing to get a clean knockout when it mattered the most, leaving me open to a counterattack… Right now, my kicks still lack Iida-kun's raw power since his Quirk gives him dedicated strength in his legs while mine is more spread out… And being in the air hasn't been working out either since my attacks at 11 percent can't generate enough wind pressure to maneuver in mid-air like All Might… Should I stick to the ground?"
This Midoriya was mumbling about the nuances of Full Cowl, an ability he had mastered before the final battle. To hear him talk about issues of the past was certainly nostalgic… It made 1A think back to those moments where he stayed up late into the night, practicing his strikes beneath the soft glow of the moon. Even with sweat drenching every inch of his body, Midoriya training was a strangely beautiful sight as the droplets of his perspiration would glisten like stars whenever One for All activated.
Looking around, Bakugou could see the ghosts of Midoriya all over the common room. The younger ones were jumping about or sitting impatiently in front of the TV while the older ones were scribbling down something or reviewing old notes. And no matter how bad the prayer like mumbling got, the unnerving noise just belonged in this hectic space called home.
"Huh?"
"What is it Kaminari-kun?" Iida briskly walked over to behind the human stun gun and looked at the page he was on. He reeled back the moment he laid eyes on the first few words, causing the others to look on with worry. Bakugou sighed and pushed for the initiative, seeing that the others weren't going to say anything.
"Well spit it out Glasses, what did Sparky find?"
"Midoriya-kun… He left something addressed to us in this book…"
Where one moment everyone was sitting in their places. The next, they were all crowded around Kaminari and began looking at the pages he was on. And sure enough, there was a very long note penned by their deceased comrade. The voice of his ghost began speaking in that kind but slightly shaky tone he's known for.
"Hey guys, if you're reading this then I definitely fell asleep while writing this whole thing down. And don't worry about me feeling betrayed or something that you're going behind my back to read this, I don't mind you guys to reading this. It's just that… I'm not sure why you would. I mean, the notes I have on everyone are pretty extensive, but it's still pretty rough and I don't think I've gotten all of it down…"
Which was a lie since the former Hero in Training had absolutely EVERYTHING on them. From weaknesses to behavioral tics, nothing got by Midoriya in his habit to catalogue data for future reference.
"Still, if you guys are reading this, you must have gone through everything before, right? I'm sorry if all that creeped you out, but I just find everyone so interesting and fun to wa – No wait, that didn't sound right either."
1A could see the phantom of the Midoriya currently speaking covering his flushed face. How on Earth did he fumble his words even when he was alone and writing this was beyond anyone. Still, seeing Midoriya as an awkward teenager served as a nice reminder of the person he was before that fated night two weeks ago.
"Of course that nerd would make a mess of his thoughts even when writing."
"Says you Bakugou, it's endearing." Uraraka answered back.
"Guys, we're trying to read here." Sero replied, gesturing to the notebook. The two gave each other a hard glare before returning to the voice pouring out of the pages.
"Okay, anyway… I just want you guys to understand the point of why I made these books and why I'm so intent on taking more. Every little bit of information I absorb, I could, somehow, apply it again sometime later. All around me I see ways to be a better Hero in each of you and I want to learn how to do it myself. So I practice it using what I know, going at it steadily until I could get the feeling down. And that's really it, I don't really have a secret to my growth or anything. I just took what I'm good at, note taking, and thought about how to apply it to what I'm bad at, which is arguably between fighting and talking with people."
"I don't think that's how it works Midori. People are a big glass box of emotions, it's hard to predict what people do." Though the moment Mina stopped, she tilted her head and the gears began spinning around at the thought. "Could it?"
"Well it would certainly help one keep track of a person's habits and personalities." Iida answered.
"Yep, that's what Midoriya wrote here in this giant crossed out paragraph."
Kaminari pointed out said writing on the page where the green Hero wrote down a detailed explanation as to why note taking could be useful for interacting with people. And based on how it was crossed out and the phantom in the room began mumbling, that entire part was completely unintentional. They shouldn't be saying this because he's gone… But that mumbling's really getting out of hand. Luckily the next passage started up with the boy realizing what went wrong and rerailing himself back on subject.
"Sorry, got off topic. I know it's a weird way of learning, but it works for me. And I'm sure there's some random method that works for you too. Not everyone is dealt a fair hand, but it's how we play our cards that allows us to make the most of what we have. So take everything you know about yourselves and each other, think about the different angles of attack, and start throwing it at the problem. Just don't be afraid to fail, pick yourself up and try again from a new perspective. And whatever it is that's bothering you, I know you'll succeed in taking care of it. I believe in you."
Bakugou saw a warm smile forming on Midoriya's phantom, an illuminating feeling that his classmates reciprocated. The gloom of the days before shrunk back before this good feel aura that surrounded them all. For the first time since that battle, 1A felt… Complete…
"But if you guys still have a few questions, just wake me up and I'll be there in a bit."
And that just soured it, way to go Midoriya. The melancholy returned as they all considered those last words, a painful reminder that caused all their friend's ghosts to disappear. Eri hugged Uraraka, the young girl showing tears as she nuzzled against her surrogate mother. There was a loud sigh from their six-armed giant.
"Well this was to be expected, Midoriya wrote this on a day where nothing was occurring."
"Agreed Shouji, this is simply a casual statement twisted into something more somber because of recent events." Tokoyami replied.
"Man, I don't know what to feel anymore…" Tooru leaned back in her seat, staring straight up at the ceiling for an answer.
"But you know, this just shows how Midori's always ready for anything… Me? I barely know what to do. School, Heroics, I just do whatever comes to my head and roll with it…" Mina was always a free spirit, but even untempered freedom had its downsides and she faced it before. Kaminari put a hand on her shoulder, a show of understanding between kindred heroic spirits who love to cause mischief.
"Carpe Diem, living like tomorrow you're going to die… That's why I could never sit still long enough to study anything… There's so much I could spend my time doing and that became a habit… And an easy excuse…"
"There's nothing wrong with that Kaminari-san. Between modern medicines and medical practices, we tend to forget how fragile life really is. It doesn't matter what walk of life you come from, we all go to the same place in the end." Yaoyorozu somberly nodded to that notion. It was morbid to think of such thoughts, but never the less appropriate during times like these.
"Yeah, but that's why Midoriya spent time living each day doing what he loved and thought about what kind of tomorrow he wanted. And I know he doesn't regret 'wasting time' on something like school work because it brings him closer to future he dreamed about. But could I say the same thing? I don't think I could…"
"Then why don't you do something about it?" All eyes were on Bakugou as he began rereading book number 13, the one that was burnt by his hands. "The nerd couldn't change the fact that he was Quirkless, but that didn't stop him from doing everything he could to try and be something he wasn't. And look where that got him…"
There were several hard glares and frowns aimed towards the explosive Hero. To even implicate such a thing while they were still healing from his sacrifice, the nerve. But before Uraraka, Iida, Todoroki, and a few others were ready to give him one Hell of a verbal lashing, Bakugou said something that would absolve his harsh tone.
"Deku became something more than any of us could accomplish. The One True Hero…"
Pensive silence…
"So? What are you going to do Sparky? Are you going to keep fooling around? Or are you finally going to fix that dim head of yours? Choice is yours."
Kaminari stared longingly at the floor before raising his head to face his peers, a new spark dancing within his gold colored eyes. He gave a soft smile as though their problems didn't matter all of a sudden, another plus to the class' recent rise in spirit. A kind of determination that you can feel…
"You know when they say that it's not about the destination but the journey? Well, you can't have a journey without a destination in mind. I'm not Midoriya, never could be… But I'm going to stop wandering around so aimlessly and start making my way to become a rad Hero. Carpe Diem is great, but I'll use that energy to dream bigger and go further."
The electric Hero then looked towards the notebooks resting on the coffee table in front of them all. All the ghosts of his former classmate reappeared, and he could see that they were all looking in every direction. But for the Midoriya that Kaminari knew personally, he was staring right back at him whilst that warm smile decorated his face. Though someone had to be the moderately wet blanket…
"Wow, I didn't think you could be so cool Chargedolt."
"Why do you got to be like that Jirou? If Mineta could climb out of his trash pit, then I could do something about my stupid ass."
"Language, Eri's still here." Uraraka proceeded to throw a cushion straight into Kaminari's face, who didn't even bother to dodge it. The one horned girl just patted the gravity Hero's arm and she relaxed as another looked up, the class' attention drawn to her. Mina, with dark eyes shining, stood up and stared ahead at the ghosts of Midoriya who looked back.
"I've made up my mind. I'm going to pull a Midoriya and start putting what I know into what I don't. Not sure if it'll really help me or not, but I trust him to know what he's talking about."
"You always strike me more as a people person Ashido, do you think those social skills will help in things like school?" Ojiro asked. There was a slight drop in his tail, a sign that didn't correct itself when Tooru began to slowly play with the fluff on the tip. Mina contemplatively looked at the martial artist and thought about her answer to his question, before speaking once more.
"I remember from somewhere that wisdom is the sum of everything a person experiences. What we learned in school, what we learned from each other… All the good and bad becomes a part of us that we could go back to. So I should have something in this head of mine that could make things work, even if I'm bad at actually applying it. But to the Deku who never gives up, I'll keep going at it until I get right."
"And we'll be here to support you whenever you need us Ashido-san. Just as Midoriya-san was there for us."
"Thanks Yaomomo."
More light came in from the afternoon sun, the clouds parting more and more. Bakugou once more looked at the ghosts of Midoriya, each fading one by one with a smile as they looked on at the blessed mess that were his classmates. The explosive Hero clenched his fist as the last disappeared, leaving them with the evidence of his efforts to be a Hero.
"Hey Bakugou, you okay?"
Mineta's question brought the rest's attention to him, those worried stares that dug into his skin… Bakugou waved them off as he began wandering off. That was until Kirishima stood up and stopped him, grip laxed on the explosive Hero's shoulder. Red eyes met as that silent tension built, no one knew if the fuse was lit inside Bakugou. For he has been very lax lately…
"Practice what you preach man. If something's eating at you, we're here to listen."
"I know Hair for Brains, but it's not that simple."
"None of this is, Bakugou-chan."
He shrugged off Tsuyu's response and Kirishima's hand, going back to wander in his thoughts. 1A left their classmate to himself as they all turned to the notebooks once more. Even if they had already gone through it, another read could yield something different about their lost friend. That and to simply hear his voice one more time before trying to muster the strength to move on.
3 days until the Memorial Service…
And that's Chapter 4! First of all, I'd like to apologize for the lack of an update. While you might think I may have been caught up by real life, I was not. I just got really lazy.
"Way to go man."
However, I'm going to do my best to reestablish my writing spirit and get back onto schedule. And create a half decent ending to this tale of grief and remembrance.
"But there's not much grief here."
I know, my feels kind of wavered when writing this part. So instead of too much sadness, I decided to put some humor in knowing these kids probably need it after what they've been through. Also coming up what would be inside Midoriya's Hero Analysis notes is tricky, especially his older ones when the guy can't be any older than four or five years old. As a result, this whole chapter has been a bit more iffy as I try to figure out what feelings go where.
"Didn't you write a draft for this or something?"
I did, but it's still hard to put all of your ideas out into practice. Anyhow, I'll leave the quality check up to you, the viewers, and start preparing to make the next chapter a bit more serious. Leave any questions, comments, and concerns in the usual place and I'll do my best to answer them.
"So stay tuned for next week where a robot and ice king do some shit that brings everyone even closer together."
So with that said...
Until Next Time. T1.