|| CHAPTER TWO ||
Here..
we've come to the end of our winding road
no one knows..
the reasons my eyes had til now been closed..
still you constantly, openly, stripped of me my deepest love
built on promises you never kept.. so just stay gone
There you are.. broken.. fake it
- For The Taking, Blackout
The sunlight stung her eyes which were dry and sore from crying almost half the night before. As if things couldn't get anymore annoying to a self proclaimed late riser, her cell phone was going off, vibrating from where she'd put the damn thing on silent the night before when a number she didn't actually know kept calling her and breathing, hanging up.
"Rise and shine." her twin deadpanned as she sat up in their old bed and stretched before answering grimly, "Fuck you, Bella. You know I hate waking up early. What's up?" as she pulled herself to a sitting position and felt around for the t shirt she'd somehow managed to come out of while sleeping the night before. Her twin sister chuckled and then said solemnly, "Just wanted to forewarn you.. Alice had a vision."
"And? It's my business because? You know I don't believe in that crap. I mean yeah, getting me to believe they were vampires was hard.. That mind reading and vision seeing crap? I will never buy into it."
"Because it's not scientific, right?" Bella finished her twin's sentence as Aria grumbled "Something like that, smartass." and pulled the t shirt down over her head as she found it. She'd forgotten how chilly fall mornings in Washington could be, in all honesty, with the way the weather was, she was beginning to have her serious doubts about her sanity when she'd packed her clothing and things to make the trip to her father's house.
"Anyway, Alice had avision.. About you.. And a shapeshifter."
"Whoa, stop right there.. Look, Bella, I know you mean well.. I know you're the motherfucking picture of domestic bliss.. But really, I'm fine the way I am. I don't want or need more heartache and disappointment in my life, okay? I'm gonna..." Bella butted in to add "You're going to what, Aria? Stick your head in the sand? Forget everything you told me you still feel for him?"
"Huh?"
"Jacob, moron.. Good god, go pour yourself some coffee and wake up already." Bella said quietly as Aria grumbled, probably more swears if Bella had to actually guess, and then said solemnly, "Not all of us get happiness and sunshineand rainbows and shit. I'm content as I am."
"You're not content. I bet right now, you're lying in bed.. At exactly 11:07 am, with tissues surrounding you. And a battered edition of either Wuthering Heights or Pride and Predjudice nearby. If memory serves, Aria, that's how you always coped when you were upset. You retreated."
"And you fucking didn't? Hello, your boyfriend deserts you in the fucking woods and you curl up there.. For two days.. Meanwhile, Bella, us sane people are going sick with worry.. At least I'm just sticking my head in the sand, sister.. My way of coping isn't going to make the entire god damn free world miserable." which made Bella sigh and shake her head then say calmly, "I'm going to tell you about the vision whether you want me to hear it or not."
The dial tone was the next thing that Bella heard and she scowled sourly at the phone for about ten minutes before shrugging it off.. If Aria wanted to bury her head in the sand, let her.. But if Alice had seen things correctly, sooner or later -knowing Jacob and his lack of patience when he really, really wanted something to happen, her personal bets were on sooner-, things were going to happen and Aria just wasn't going to be allowed to bury her head in the sand anymore.
"You've done all you can do." Edward replied from across their breakfast nook as he looked at her and managed a smile before adding, "It's more fun this way."
"Not really, no.. Trust me, I know my twin, Edward.. This is going to be about as much fun for the poor guy as a trip to the dentist for a root canal.. You heard everything she told me when she came here to stay a while and clear the air between us."
"And if it's meant to be, Bella, it will happen. We're in Alaska, there's really not much we can do to help things along."
"True, but.. It's just I love my sister and I loved Jacob, I still love him as a friend.. And if they can both be happy together.." Bella mused as she stared out the window and at the gentle pale sunrise. If Aria was going to be stubborn then how the hell were things finally supposed to fix themselves?
And why did she have a brief and fleeting pang of jealousy for her twin's simple and silly mortal problems, anyway? She'd chosen the life she wanted and for the most part, she was content... Every now and then, however, a stray what if would wander into her head and she'd wind up obsessing over it all day. Today, apparently, was going to be one of those days.
Aria sat on the bed in her old bedroom, scowling at the phone when the downstairs doorbell rang. She raised a brow but remembered that her father was still sleeping and quickly grabbed the first thing she could find as passable for a shirt, an old one she'd sort of stolen from Jacob back when they'd been friends, back before she finally couldn't take anymore and she'd left just to get away from the bizarre triangle he let himself be roped into over and over.
It never occurred to her that Jacob Black would be the person knocking on her father's door at 11:15 on a Saturday.
If she'd had an inkling, she'd have at least put on pajamas or something.
She jogged down the stairs and opened the door a crack and promptly gasped as she set her first sight on an older and definitely more ruggedly handsome Jacob Black. For a moment, she wanted to smile, but instead she remarked dryly, 'You let your hair grow back."
Jacob nodded. The tension was so thick between them you could almost reach out and pluck a handful out of the air. He stifled a lump in his throat and a groan that tried to fight it's way to the surface when he realized she was actually sleeping.. And apparently, in one of his old and long forgotten sleeveless t shirts. He couldn't help but let his eyes roam over her body slowly, lick his lips as he finally coughed and said "Yeah.. I heard you were back in town.. Now maybe you can explain to me why in the hell you leave without even a goodbye or a text or something?"
Aria stared at him a moment, slowly a dull smirk crept onto her full lips as she bit her lower lip and answered quietly, "Wasn't aware that I had to clear anything with you, Jacob."
"You could've said goodbye." Jacob argued.
"Fine.. Goodbye." Aria said as she shut the door and slid down, sitting in the hardwood floor in front of it. He knocked and she grumbled.
Why the hell did he care now?
Why the hell did her heart skip a beat because he cared now?
"It's the damn horomones. That's all.. It doesn't help that he's always been sexy and very aware of it, very able to use that damn sexiness as a weapon or something. And those eyes, ughhh.. " she grumbled to herself as a warning.
Her sister's odd phone call came back to her at that particular moment and she wondered if Jacob weren't the shifter in question that Alice had a vision about her with.. Now she was curious and kicking herself for hanging up on her twin.
Why hadn't she just humored her?
'Because, Aria, you fucking idiot.. You've never stopped loving the damn guy.. Problem is, he's never actually loved you.. Not even a little. And he's always chosen Bella over you. If she were free right now? He wouldn't be standing on your father's porch making an issue as to why you chose to leave without telling him goodbye.' her thankfully practical mind insisted while the other part of it insisted 'Open the damn door.. There was something in his eyes.. Just like that night you went to him and laid it all out on the line then ran out of his house like the big chickenshit you're known for being, Aria.. He had that look again. If you don't open the damn door, Aria, you'll never know and you'll always wonder..'
She sighed as Jacob called out through the door, "C'mon.. Just open the door, okay? All I wanna do is see you.. I want to talk to you.. About that last night I did actually see you."
"Go away, Jacob. I'm too broken now, okay? Just leave.. Leave me alone right now. I cannot have this discussion with you.. Especially not right now." Aria called out as Jacob grumbled, shuffled his feet and glared at the door.
Apparently, this was going to be much more complicated than he'd originally thought. It was a good thing, he reckoned, that he was up for a good challenge, and as stubborn as he'd always been.
Then again, Bella had warned Sam that in order for this all to work itself out, things weren't going to be a walk in the park.
"Sooner or later, Aria, we're going to have to talk about why things got left the way they did."
The door flung open and Aria glared up at him, a hand tangled in her distractingly long and wavy hair as she said sourly, "Talk about why.. Jacob Ephiram Black, get off my fucking porch now.. Things got left the way they did, okay, because you didn't want to hear anything I had to say then. This does not give you the right to come around 3 years later and demand answers. You made your choice, I made mine."
"And obviously, neither of them were the right one." Jacob argued as she fought to shut the door and he stopped her from properly doing so, earning him probably the dirtiest look she'd given him to date.
And she gave dirty looks a lot when people irritated her.
"It gives me every right and you know it, Aria.. You don't just climb through a guy's window, half drunk and totally out of it, throw yourself at the guy, offer up a journal in which you describe in great detail every dirty little thing you want to do to said guy and not expect him to be stunned. And then you run like hell?" Jacob argued as she grumbled and said "And naturally, you're still as dense as ever. If you'd really cared to know me then, Jacob, you'd have seen it.. As for now? Trust me when I say this.. You do not want me.. I'm done with love. I'm done with putting myself out there and getting fucked over. Now go home." before finally exerting every last bit of energy she had to shut the damn door properly.
He stood glaring at the closed door, scratching his head. Okay, so he'd tried the direct approach.. And as predicted, it'd blown up right in his face.. Now he had to fight his way in.. maybe he'd be a lot more patient and subtle..
He'd try but he couldn't promise.. He'd been without her for almost 3 years now and it was killing him slowly. Now that she was back, naturally, he wanted the pain to end. He wanted to make her his and he was now more than willing to do everything it took to make that happen.