A/N: From the anon prompt requesting 'domestic Kurtbastian'. Newlywed Kurt and Sebastian trying to negotiate doing laundry. 511 words. Future-fic. AU.
Sebastian stood impatiently balancing his basket of dirty laundry on his hip, watching Kurt sort through his clothes.
"Come on, Kurt," Sebastian pleaded, "just give me your shit so I can do the laundry. We have reservations in a couple of hours."
"Pft," Kurt scoffed, separating his clothes into numerous piles on his bed. "Patience is a virtue."
"Ugh!" Sebastian groaned in frustration. He spotted a promising looking pile of t-shirts that had been neglected for more than ten minutes, and started loading them into the basket. Kurt's head snapped up to look at him, eyes wide with horror.
"Wh-what do you think you're doing?" Kurt screeched, grabbing Sebastian's wrist to stop his attack on the clothes.
"I'm trying to get to the wash before my clothes are actually out of style," Sebastian griped, watching with despair as Kurt rescued the few t-shirts Sebastian had managed to toss into the basket back out again.
"Too late," Kurt grumbled, laying the t-shirts back out on the bed.
Sebastian raised a foot and kicked Kurt lightly on the ass.
"Oomph!" Kurt fell forward, throwing out his arms to catch himself before he hit the bed.
"They're just t-shirts, Kurt," Sebastian whined. "Just give them to me so I can finish the wash."
"These aren't just t-shirts," Kurt said. "And they need to be steam cleaned or else they'll fade."
Sebastian rolled his eyes.
"Okay," he relented. "Well, what about those?" Sebastian pointed to a pile of jeans beside the t-shirts. Kurt shook his head, clucking his tongue, refusing to dignify Sebastian's question with a remark.
Sebastian dropped his head and sighed.
"So, how do you do your laundry then if nothing can go into the machine?"
"Well, I do some of them by hand," Kurt explained, "and the rest get dry cleaned."
"Dry cleaned?" Sebastian choked. "Your laundry must cost a fortune. We might as well just go out and buy you a whole new wardrobe. I think it'd be cheaper."
Kurt stopped mid-sort, dropping the sweater he was holding onto the bed.
"You know, you're right," Kurt said. He turned to Sebastian, his eyes twinkling, his mouth curled into a mischievous grin. "Dry cleaning this is going to be really expensive." Kurt wrapped his arms around Sebastian's waist, running his hands down his back and over his ass. Sebastian moaned as Kurt's hands ventured around to the front of his jeans. Sebastian closed his eyes, gripping the laundry basket tighter as Kurt's hands dipped into his pockets, brushing against his rapidly hardening cock. But then Kurt's hands were gone. Sebastian opened his eyes as Kurt pulled away. Kurt walked to the closet and grabbed his coat.
"Wait?" Sebastian stuttered in confusion. "Where are you going?"
"You do your laundry your way. I'll do my laundry mine." Kurt blew Sebastian a kiss. "I'm off to the mall. See you in a few."
Sebastian watched in a stupor as Kurt left, a little perplexed. Then a thought crossed his mind. He dropped his laundry basket and searched his pants pocket.
His wallet was gone.