Chapter Sixteen
As Myka was driving away from the Warehouse, having borrowed Pete's car, she soon became aware that she was beyond tired and quickly wound the windows down to let an early autumn breeze in. She could almost feel the dawn fast approaching and wished the adrenaline from her confrontation with Artie would last long enough to get her home safely.
She pictured the lost expression in Helena's eyes again and prayed that her instincts had been right. It would be so easy for the inventor to wait for Leena to go to bed and then sneak out the door in the middle of the night, driving no matter how carelessly, until she could hop on the nearest coach or train to nowhere. But she had promised to let Myka be a part of her life. It wasn't much of a promise, but it had clearly been made with the understanding that their future, simple or not, would be together.
Myka chose to put her faith in that.
Not a soul stirred in Univille as she drove through the sleepy town and, with relief, turned off the engine of Pete's four by four and climbed wearily out. She followed the lit path to the front door and crept inside noiselessly. The first thing she spotted were the two new pairs of shoes by the door and she sighed happily; one pair was notably smaller than the other.
The house was quiet. Even creeping passed the inventor's door there was nothing and Myka had to keep those child-sized shoes in mind to stay focussed on the task of preparing for bed so that she wouldn't succumb to a panic attack.
She eventually heard the tell-tale sounds of Claudia, Pete and Steve arriving home and was surprised to find that she didn't feel guilty about Artie's absence. In her mind she watched as they all settled for the night and felt as the house fell sleepy again. Still her eyes stayed open. She was beyond exhaustion; should not have physically been able to stay awake, and yet her mind still whirred like it was powered by some external force.
HG's door opened with barely a creak but Myka still found herself wincing at the intrusive noise. Her eyes were well adjusted to the dark and she noted with a heavy heart that the double bed was empty. Panic rose again in her chest, until her gaze fell on the child sound asleep across the room.
A smile tugged at her lips without thought and her feet carried her in a similar fashion to the girl's side. Kneeling by the side of the bed, Myka ignored the practical voice in her head that told her she shouldn't be there. Leaning down to press a tender kiss to Christina's forehead felt as natural as hugging her parents or kissing her sister goodbye after a heartfelt talk. For whatever reason, she was bound to this child now and would do whatever was in her power to keep her safe from harm.
A movement in the corner of the room caught the agent's attention and she was immediately on high-alert, standing swiftly and angling her body to protect Christina's. As a lithe figure stepped out of the shadows though, she relaxed.
"Helena," she whispered lovingly and took several steps towards the Brit before stopping to reconsider her reception. HG's expression was tense, her haunted eyes carrying the pain of prolonged torture and complete fatigue. "Helena? What are you doing in the corner of the room?" Myka asked, attempting to be both considerate and practical.
The inventor's eyes pooled with tears and she wrapped her arms around herself, looking fearfully over at her daughter. Myka forgot her trepidation and instinctively reached out to comfort the other woman. She could sense the imminent breakdown that hovered around the Victorian and wanted to soften that fall as much as possible.
Without trying to elicit a verbal response, Myka coaxed Helena over to the inventor's bed and pulled her into it. HG was reluctant to comply and give up control, but had no energy to put up much of a fight. She allowed the younger agent to pull her head onto a waiting shoulder and took a long deep breath through her tears.
Myka kissed the top of the dark head and ran her fingers soothingly through silky hair. "She's right there, Helena." They both had a good view of the young girl and though their eyes stung with a lack of sleep, the two women gazed with fascination at the small miracle that slept soundly.
Helena's voice was tense and full of emotion, her words lacking their usual smooth clarity as she finally found the ability to respond. "I'm afraid that this is going to be something of a challenge, darling," she sniffed and accepted a tissue that her companion conjured out of nowhere. "I want her to have a normal life, full of opportunity and wonder... I can't even let her sleep without fearing for her safety."
Myka continued her gentle stroking as she considered what she wanted to say. While never having experiences a loss like Helena's, she could understand and empathise with the inventor's fears. "I don't know that I can say anything to make you feel any less afraid of losing her, but as long as you want me around Helena, I'll be here, for you and Christina." She felt HG's arms wrap tighter around her and watched as dark eyes fluttered shut for a longer moment. "I don't know quite what happened in that place," Myka swallowed with difficulty, her mouth having gone dry. What would the writer think to this intense connection she felt towards Christina? "Something's different."
Helena's head rose in alarm to gaze up at Myka. "What do you mean? Are you ill?" The very idea, voiced, sent a new pang of panic through her body, forcing her to sit up straighter. "Myka, you just promised never to leave me; do not begin to tell me that it may only be in spirit or thought... I do not believe that I could..." Tears were now falling in earnest and she felt the sudden urge to hit the younger woman for crushing her hopes again.
Myka scrambled to calm the Victorian down, having been taken completely by surprise at HG's outburst. Helena was terrified of losing her too? What did this mean? "I'm fine, Helena. I'm not going anywhere. I plan to be with you, mind, body and soul for as long as you want me around." She felt the inventor's body sag, collapsing into her arms.
"What did you mean then?" HG asked at length.
Myka knew she couldn't hesitate any longer; couldn't let Helena worry over the unknown. "I didn't expect to feel this way about her. I didn't mean for it to happen. I feel like she's a part of me," her voice became reverent as she looked over at the sleeping child. She felt, more than saw, HG's surprise.
Helena glanced between Myka and Christina. She recognised the look in the agent's eyes and felt a wave of utter delight crash through her. "You love her," she said in a strangled voice.
Myka gazed down at the bedclothes in shame, mistaking the inventor's tone. "Like she'd my own," she confessed anyway and then looked up with guilt-filled eyes. "I'm sorry Helena. You only just have her back and here I am already trying to make a claim on her. I really didn't mean to feel this way."
Helena pulled Myka in close, placing a kiss on her forehead. "Shh, do not distress yourself love. You are absolutely right. With anyone else, I would be incensed to hear them claim the same devotion as my own. But Myka," she lifted the brunette's chin so they were eye to eye. "If anyone is worthy of sharing this feeling with me, it is you."
"You're not upset?" Myka chanced looking into dark sleepy eyes, saw more than skin deep affection there and for a moment, she dared to hope. On the tip of her tongue sat three little words that she longed to say, but something told her that it was too early. More relief than disappointment filled her mind though; there might still be a time and a place for such declarations.
Helena shook her head with her last ounce of strength and sank with a sigh into the pillows, pulling Myka down with her. She wrapped a lazy arm around the younger woman's waist. "Not at all darling. I am quite relieved, truth be told; we will be safe with you."
Agent Bering beamed at her companion, her top lip quirking in the unique way it did when she was truly happy about something, and wriggled closer before finally succumbing to the heaviness of her eyelids.
"Myka?" Helena whispered, semi-conscious.
"Hmm?"
"I will always want you around," HG reassured her from the bottom of her heart.
As they joined their little one in slumber, darkness waned beyond the windowpane; the dawn of a new day rising.
So there you have it. It is the end of a beginning, but as always I make no promises for a complete sequel (for those of you who are at all interested). Saying that, I have written two chapters and am working on a third. I have just finished watching the end of season 4 for the second time so have a slightly better idea of the timeline (I really didn't remember the whole Boone fiasco being so late in the series!) Lots of ideas, now just have to stop playing Skyrim and take pen and paper to the local coffee shop.
Back to school/work after next weekend and at some point before Xmas I hope to be in my own home - with an office space all my own to while away the hours scribbling out femslashy goodness!