Happy Birthday Kas!

I've had this idea bottled up since Phannimay, as such it all sort of came out at once really...

Down the Rabbit Hole

:: (Established Iambic Prose)

"...This is not how I planned to spend my Saturday." In all due fairness Danny figured he was allowed to sound like a whining child just this once. Especially since he had woken up in a dirt cavern with high ceilings, polished tiled floors, and was wearing a bright blue dress with a white apron. "At all."

He had planned to spend the day sleeping in and hanging out with his friends and boyfriend, not waking up in what looked like...like he didn't even know what. Seeing doors that ringed the circular room he shrugged his shoulders and walked towards one, trying the handle carefully and letting out a sigh of relief when he wasn't shocked with thousands of volts of electricity. "Okay then, not as bad a day as it could be."

Turning the handle and feeling it was locked he only smirked, taking a step back. "Locked doors. How original." Taking a breath he grinned even wider, "Going ghost!" There was a few seconds of the words echoing around the cavern, Danny's smile slowly falling. Feeling a flash of panic he tried again, "G-Going ghost!" Feeling nothing but his very human self he lowered his arms, eye twitching.

"In a dress. Ghost powers locked. Not good." There were a few ways to lock his ghost powers but to be able to do that and put him in a dress and leave him here? Without him noticing? Maybe it was another one of Nocturne's dreams- No, Clockwork had threatened Nocturne to never give Danny another nightmare. He wasn't sure what the time ghost had threatened his trickster friend with but since it had worked he didn't question it. "Okay so it's not Nocturne, and Clockwork would have warned me if this was going to be something too disastrous...

"I could still be dreaming though," he hummed, walking towards another one of the doors before pausing, hearing the sharp click that he only heard on tile when his mom or sister wore heels. Slowly looking down he flinched at seeing he was in black dress shoes and white stockings. Suddenly paling he quickly lifted his dress up and pulled the stockings away, looking down before sighing in relief and lowering his dress. "Whew, okay, could have been worse."

Deciding to try the other doors he frowned, although he wasn't surprised, when they were all locked. Sighing he leaned against one of the walls, letting his head fall back and frowning when he felt a piece of fabric in his hair. Jerking it out he scowled at seeing it was a blue, silky ribbon. Tossing it away he blinked at feeling the same sensation on his head. Reaching up he jerked out another ribbon. "Oh no, please no..."

Danny wasn't sure how long he spent tearing out hair ribbons but by the time he stopped he had a good pile of them on the floor by his feet, enough to make a rather long piece of rope if he had to guess. "Self-replicating hair ribbon..." Pinching his skin as hard as he could he flinched and let out a slight hiss. "Not a dream. Great. That means it's a ghost." As he kicked the pile of ribbons he felt a flash of irritation. What sick freak would do something like this?!

Suddenly getting a terrible feeling he jerked his dress off, whining when another one appeared on him in less than a second. "Fuck you, ghost! Fuck! You!" Huffing he threw the dress towards the center of the room, blinking when he heard it land and pile against something. Looking up he saw a small, round glass table in the middle of the room, a small vial of liquid and what looked like a miniature piece of cake.

Walking closer he saw each had a label, one saying 'Eat Me!' and another saying 'Drink me!'. A skeleton key was in the center. Seeing a small door, a size only a mouse could fit through, between two of the large doors Danny let out a noise that he wasn't sure was irritation or hopelessness. "I'm in goddamn Wonderland."

He was trapped inside of a book. A book. He didn't even consider the possibility of it being his boyfriend, Andrew had made it very clear he would never trap Danny in another book. And the fact he wasn't rhyming was also a sign, since Andrew had explained whenever he used his powers to put someone in a book it took on a rhyming format. That meant this was another ghost who could put people in books.

Oh Andrew was going to be pissed.

"Alright how did this book go..." He had read it before in class but he hadn't payed much attention, his life was crazy enough without trying to understand the chaos that was Wonderland. Although he had watched the movie, the recent one with Johnny Depp. Maybe that would at least help. "The liquid makes you grow big and the food makes you grow small, got it."

Swiping the small cake he chewed it quickly, waiting for it to work. In a few seconds he was wincing as his body took up half the cavern, arms and legs twisted uncomfortably. "Right. Food big. Liquid small." Carefully picking up the tiny glass vial he uncorked it as best he could, swallowing the contents. In seconds he was falling onto the dress he had thrown, the fabric acting as a cushion as he slid down to the floor. Raising his arms in victory he grinned, running to the door and turning the handle.

It was locked.

"I'm a goddamn idiot." Looking over towards the glass table, where the key was just near the edge and mocking him, Danny growled, looking around the room. He refused to be as stupid as Alice and try climbing the sheer glass. Seeing the pile of ribbons he had torn out earlier he grinned, walking towards them and dragging a few back to the table, slowly tying them into a length of rope.

"This would be a lot easier if I had my ghost powers," he commented to the empty room, sounding as if it wasn't quite as big a deal as it should have been. He had fought enough times without his powers by now to know how to improvise. Climbing over his dress he began picking through the fabric, eyes intent on finding what he was searching for. Seeing a button, small to normal-sized people but huge to him, he grinned and began tearing at the thread.

"Wow, what a cheap dress." The button came off almost instantly, Danny tying the ribbon rope around the plastic counterweight and walking back to the other side of the table. Seeing he brass key near the edge he grinned, whirling the button through the air by the base of the rope. "Alice clearly needed to learn how to use a grappling hook."

Throwing the button in a clean arc it landed in the middle of the table, Danny carefully pulling it towards him until it hooked around the key. Laughing he gave one sharp tug, grinning as the key came crashing to the floor. Gleefully picking the key up he dragged it towards the door, thankful he still had some of his unnatural ghost strength, as he fit the key into the lock, which took up half the door.

"You know, I don't quite remember the door having a lock this big in the book or the movie," Danny grumbled, twisting the key with his whole body and smiling as he heard a click. Pulling the key out he pushed it aside and opened the door, breath taken away by the sight. "Real or not I have to admit...I'm impressed."

There looked to be an entire tropical jungle in front of him, only with the cool air one would expect from a forest whirling around him. Bright colors met his eyes as he carefully kept to the trail that was marked out. Hearing various rustles in the bushes and noises of creatures running past he tensed himself, ready for anything. He may have been in a book but he had learned firsthand that the pain could be real.

"Oh man oh man oh man oh man." Hearing frantic muttering in the distance Danny narrowed his eyes and tilted his head, trying to hear over the sounds of multiple birds and the wind whistling through the tree. The tone sounded panicked but the voice sounded...familiar. He knew that voice- "This is so not natural!"

"Tucker?!" Running forward Danny quickly leaped off the path and over rocks and sticks and whatever else was in his way, searching for where he had heard his best friend's voice coming from. "Hey, Tucker! Can you hear me?!" If he himself was in here then there was always a good chance his friends were trapped too- Oh jeez Sam was going to kill him. "Tuck?!"

Hearing the voice fade away into the distance Danny sighed, now lost more than ever. "Right. What's the one thing you're always told to do when lost? Never leave the path. And what did I just do..." Glancing around him Danny let out a slight tremble, letting the fear take over for a few seconds. "I left the path..." It was one thing to be stranded alone in a forest, but alone without his powers and only six inches tall?

He wasn't sure how he was going to get out of this one.

"Okay, okay, keep calm Fenton." Danny decided to ignore the way his voice shook. "You've faced worse than this. So you're six inches tall and don't have your ghost powers. That's fine, great! You can fix this." Hearing a heavy noise behind him he blinked and looked back, heart pounding before he saw a fluffy brown rabbit that dwarfed him in size. "Oh- Oh, hey there little guy, or, uh, big guy."

Letting out a rush of air Danny felt himself almost fall over from relief. "Man, you really had me scared for a second there, I thought you were some-" Danny cut himself off at seeing the rabbit now had sharp teeth bared at him, eyes a blood red as it growled and stalked closer. "-thing coming to eat me..."

Danny was a powerful half-ghost teen superhero and a mature seventeen-year-old who was able to face whatever problems he had. However when he was terrified out of his mind and had no idea what to do he defaulted to his typical behavior of completely human Danny Fenton, which was sometimes so far buried under his hero-complex he had a hard time finding it anymore. When he did however he had one instinct. "ANDREW!"

Scream for his overprotective boyfriend.

Seeing the rabbit lunge for him Danny whimpered and shut his eyes, hoping his death would at least be quick, before he felt the shocking sensation of something lifting him clean off the ground. "Shoo you vermin." Hearing the irritated mutter Danny blinked his eyes open, ignoring the tears that slightly blurred his vision, as he saw Andrew was holding him gently in his hands and nudging the hissing rabbit towards the bushes. "Goddamn rodents."

"Andrew!" Being six inches tall did nothing to stop Danny from scrambling up Andrew's shirt and snuggling into his cheek. "Jesus I thought I was about to become rabbit food."

"I noticed," Andrew huffed, still looking irritated, although he let out a small smile at seeing Danny was okay. "...I'm assuming you were put into the role of Alice in this story."

"Still a guy though," Danny sighed in relief, Andrew choking on a laugh. "I checked. But yeah. Alice- You're real, right? Because if you're not I will be very disappointed."

"Yes Danny, I'm real," Andrew rolled his eyes, carefully taking Danny off of his shoulder and holding him in his hands so he could keep eye-contact with him, Danny sitting down comfortably, no fear of the other dropping him. "And before you ask me to prove it I will simply refer to the fact that you talk in your sleep." Danny blushed at that, grumbling under his breath as Andrew smirked. "Last you stayed over you kept asking me how to ask someone you loved on a date. In French."

"Okay! I get it! You're real!" Danny blushed, blue eyes finally settling on just what Andrew was wearing. Choking on a laugh he quickly covered his mouth, Andrew giving him a dull look. "It could always be worse?" In response the purple cat ears on top of Andrew's hair flicked in annoyance, tail swishing behind him.

"True, I suppose. After all, I could always be in a dress." At that Danny lost his smile, Andrew grinning contently. "Although I'm not too happy with the shirt I've been made to wear."

"Purple stripes look good on you," the teen snickered again, crawling from Andrew's hand, across his arm, up his chest and head, and resting in his hair. "Onwards mighty steed! We must find a way to escape!" Andrew only blinked, finally sighing and letting his shoulders slump.

"You are such a child."

"And you love me anyways," Danny cooed, one hand soothing down the stuck up fur on the cat ears, the teen grinning in delight when Andrew blushed and flicked his ears back. "Is it bad of me to hope you keep these ears?"

"Depends whether or not it's wrong that I like to see you in dresses." Danny blushed at that, settling down on top of Andrew's messy hair as he began walking through the forest again, glaring at anything that seemed to move. Quiet for a few minutes of walking Danny finally spoke up.

"I'll wear more dresses if you wear cat ears and leather when we get home."

"Deal." Danny had to choke back his laughter at realizing there hadn't even been a second of hesitation. He really did love his mate. "So now we have to find our way out...shouldn't be too hard."

"Yeah but here's the thing, I think I saw Tucker here earlier." He felt Andrew pause in his stride before lightly shaking his head.

"That could be a problem then."

"Especially since that means there's a good chance Sam and Jazz are here too," Danny grumbled. He knew Jazz wouldn't mind too much, seeing as this was one of her favorite books, but he knew Sam wouldn't like it. She had enjoyed the movie but the book was something that she didn't quite like, and being stuck in it probably wouldn't make her enjoy it either. "So, hey, I don't remember the book too well, but didn't Alice meet others before running into the Cheshire Cat?"

"Yes, she first ran into a group of animals and then scared them off with talk of her ferocious cat, then she runs into the White Rabbit again, who mistakes her for his maidservant. After more problems with her growing and shrinking height she runs into the blue caterpillar-"

"Absolem?" Andrew half shrugged his shoulder, pushing away leaves and vines and making sure they didn't knock Danny to the ground.

"If you wish, the book never named him though, he was merely the Blue Caterpillar." Danny nodded, nudging Andrew's cat ear as a gesture for him to continue. Andrew blushed again before clearing his throat. "After receiving mushrooms that made her change height she mixed them to get back to her relatively normal size-"

"Do you have any of those mushrooms?"

"I'm not letting you eat 'shrooms," Andrew replied in a flat tone, Danny snickering as the other rolled his eyes. "Anyways, once she's back to a proper height she stumbles upon the Duchess and the Cheshire Cat. From what I can tell the only one you've met is that demonic rabbit that tried to eat you."

"...your skin is tan."

"...what?"

"Your skin. It's tan. And you're not glowing- Holy shit the book made you human." Andrew was quiet as his shoulders slumped again, Danny blushing a bright red. "Shut up! I only just noticed okay! Give me a break I'm only six inches tall!" Andrew only kept quiet, Danny muttering viciously under his breath. "I can hear your traitorous thoughts, Andy."

"You're starting a war you won't be able to win, Daniel," Andrew grumbled back up, both glaring at the other as best they could. It was a few seconds until a cough broke their silence, both looking up in surprise to see a large group of tables all pushed together in a clearing, laden with tea cups, plates, bowls, and four people gathered around the table.

"Happy Un-Birthday." Danny flinched at the sound of Sam's glacial tone. Peeking out of Andrew's mess of hair he saw Sam at the head of the table, large top hat on her head that was tilted to the side, tailcoat trailing the edges of the ground, even with her sitting. A teacup was clenched in her hands that held a bright pink liquid. "Now get me the fuck out of this book."

"Oh please do stop your glaring," Andrew rolled his eyes, walking towards the table and picking an armchair to curl up on. "It's hardly my fault we're here, and I'm just as irritated as you."

"Alice seems to have used the Cheshire Cat for a lift to the tea party." Hearing the familiar voice Danny blinked and looked up, seeing Clockwork's apprentice sitting at the table next to their two friends.

"What are you three doing here?!" Habato shrugged, sipping at a cup of blue tea that shimmered in a clear glass tea cup.

"I'm the Door Mouse!" Nomi screamed, jumping up on the table and holding a rapier sword up high. Habato only gave her a small glare, kicking the table and grinning as she yelped and fell back onto a couch that was pushed up to the table. Danny only shook his head, looking over at Hollow who was holding her own tea cup.

"And you're the March Hare, I guess," Danny pulled himself up for better vantage, seeing Hollow had long, fuzzy brown rabbit ears and a waistcoat and hat on. Hollow grinned, sharp teeth glistening as she nodded.

"You're late for tea!" She threw her tea cup at Andrew's head, who only ducked as he looked bored, Danny clinging to his mate and looking terrified.

"And you?" Andrew asked, glancing towards who Habato who only took another sip of their tea before shrugging.

"I suppose I'm Time."

"Then I can blame you for the fact we've been here for hours drinking nothing but tea," Sam grumbled, propping her legs up on the table and knocking the rest of her pink tea back. "Someone better find a way out of here before I use these glass cups to go kill whoever did this."

"I'll run my sword through their measly cowardly heart!" Nomi declared, standing on the table once again. This time it was one of Hollow's thrown plates that knocked her back down to the couch.

"Ignore her, she's invested into her role," Habato rolled their eyes. "Anyone have any ideas on how to break out of this novel?" As they spoke they looked to Andrew, who only raised an eyebrow in response. "Well you are the expert in these cases."

"I have as little an idea as you I imagine," Andrew replied tiredly, carefully plucking Danny off his head and setting him on the table. The teen immediately went to work on looking for something to change him back to his normal size, Sam watching him with amusement. "This is constructed differently than my own novels and powers. None of the characters, us, are following their intended storyline progression."

"So we're screwed?" Habato asked, sighing as Nomi stood up on the table again, sword pointed at the woods.

"Show yourself you blighted demon! I'll run you through with the strength of my ancestors!" Another kick to the table and she groaned as she hit the ground.

"Why the hell do you sound Scottish," Habato grumbled, blinking as they saw a tiny Danny run across their plate. "...I agree with the Mad Hatter over there. We need out of here."

"How did Alice wake up in the book?" Hollow asked, trying to trap Danny underneath her teacup as he scrambled for cover. Andrew only rolled his eyes, thinking back.

"Well, during the trial in the Red Court her sister woke her up, alluding that the whole story was nothing but the dream of a tired little girl."

"So we just hope Jazz wakes Danny up and breaks the spell or power or whatever?" Sam asked, blinking as she suddenly had a triumphantly screaming Danny shoving a small cake into his mouth in front of her. In a flash he was proper size, standing on the table with his fists raised in triumph.

"I am tall!"

"If you want to call five feet and two inches tall then sure Danny, you're tall," Sam rolled her eyes, Danny giving her a glare as they all heard someone stumble into the clearing. Looking over they saw Tucker groan and pick himself off the ground, adjusting his waistcoat as white ears twitched on his head and a pocket-watch hung at his side.

It took two seconds for him to collapse into laughter while pointing at his best friend, who was now blushing a bright red and crossing his arms, moving to sit in Andrew's lap and sulk, the man only snickering and kissing the teen's temple.

"Wow, so you were made the White Rabbit," Sam commented, Tucker only trying to breath through his laughter. "There's irony in there I'm just not sure if I should comment on it."

"My advice is to not," Tucker snorted, finally calming down. "Although I take no offense, I'm actually amused myself. Not as amused as seeing Danny in a dress and apron though-"

"It's a frock!" Danny defended, snuggling into Andrew's neck, who only rolled his eyes and rubbed the other's back soothingly.

"Yes, that sounds so much more manly," Sam snickered, setting her tea down. "On to business now that we're all here." Tucker approached the table as she spoke, finally noticing the Gears.

"YOU'RE LATE FOR TEA!" Tucker yelped as a tea cup straight to his forehead knocked him down to the ground, Sam not even phased as she kept speaking.

"We need to find a way out of this book." The others nodded seriously, ignoring Danny's snickers as Tucker swore up a storm, hands clutched to his forehead. "Our best bet is to find whoever put us in here and beat him, or her, or them, or whatever, until they can no longer move and are slowly bleeding out on this lovely grass."

"You Team Phantom lot worry me," Habato muttered, sipping their tea again. "And that's coming from a ghost who runs a mafia."

"Wait- I thought those were rumors?!" Danny shouted, suddenly looking concerned. Habato only raised an eyebrow, looking amusedly confused.

"Of course they are."

"Then- Wait- Do you own a mafia?"

"Don't be silly, Phantom," Habato rolled their eyes, reaching for a tea that was colored a glimmering golden. "Do you honestly see me as the type to run a mafia or anything like that?"

"Well...no...but you just said..." Habato only smiled again, Danny groaning and scratching at his head. "You three give me headaches." As if on cue Nomi stood up on the table with her sword drawn, Hollow cutting her off before she could speak.

"LATE FOR TEA!" A flurry of tea cups were thrown at the girl, who dodged them all.

"GODDAMMIT HOLLOW IT'S ALWAYS 6PM HERE I'M NOT FUCKING LATE STOP THROWING SHIT!" Hollow's only reply was a thrown bowl of sugar that knocked Nomi off the table into a pile of broken porcelain and sugar cubes. "Goddamn you."

"Tea time."

"Andrew get us out of here," Danny begged, looking close to breaking. "I can't handle all there of them at once it ends with me confused and worried and slightly scared for whatever is left of my life."

"For starters you should calm down," Andrew soothed, kissing the teen's cheek comfortingly. "The only way for this book to end is for either the author to type it out, or for the story to end as it was originally written."

"So we're relying on Jazz?" At the nod Tucker, Sam, and Danny all groaned. "We're doomed."

::

Jasmine Fenton looked at her watch worriedly. Her little brother, his boyfriend, and his two friends had left to see a movie hours ago and they had yet to return. Finally sighing and resigning to the fact Danny would forever call her overprotective she headed towards her room, intent on finding a spare Fenton Thermos and the 'boo'merang. What she found instead was a hardcover book on her desk in a dark purple color with the title 'Alice in Wonderland' and a picture of Alice and her sister sitting on the hill.

Raising an eyebrow at the strange book, that was glowing, she edged closer, frowning at seeing the two siblings looked like her and Danny. "...I have a bad feeling about this." Seeing the name of the author she let out a loud snorting sound, covering her mouth as her face went red with suppressed laughter. "I know this is probably punishment for the war they almost caused two weeks ago but even for you that's cruel."

Seeing a note that said to open the book Jazz did so, taking a step back when seven figures came tumbling out of the pages and into her room. Quickly stashing the book and note under her pillow she took in the sight of the groaning ghosts and humans, all of them looking as if they had just returned home from an Alice in Wonderland costume contest.

Habato was the first one to get up, flicking their ghostly tail in annoyance. "You have my thanks." Sparing Jazz a smile they collected the other two Gears, one waving a sword and another screaming about tea time. Seeing them phase towards the basement she looked back to the other four, who were all still on the floor and groaning.

"So, have fun at the movies?" At the resounding groan she snickered, helping them to their feet and almost busting a lung trying not to laugh at Danny's attire. Andrew at least had come away with the Cheshire Cat ears and tail being fake an attached like a well-made costume. Danny however was still in the full dress.

"I'm going home," Sam sighed wearily, heading towards the door. "We are to never talk about this ever again." The others nodded in agreement, Tucker deciding to follow her, fake white rabbit ears bouncing in time with this subdued footsteps. Jazz finally looked to Danny, who was tugging at his dress in annoyance.

"Thanks for getting us out of there Jazz." The woman only waved it off, Andrew looking curious as he looked around the room.

"What happened to the book?"

"Oh, it vanished as soon as you all escaped." Andrew nodded before blinking as Danny suddenly grabbed his hand and dragged him out the door and towards his bedroom.

"I have to get out of this dress before I lose any more dignity." Andrew snickered as he was pulled along, Danny only giving an evil smile. "You're helping me." At that Andrew immediately lost his amusement, face going a bright green as the door closed behind them.

Jazz had to bite back the warning to use protection.

Waiting a few minutes to make sure everything was quiet Jazz smiled as she took the book out again, snickering at seeing the author name, which was a C. L. Work. "Clockwork you bring whole new meaning to punishing children." Settling on her bed she opened to the first page, deciding to see just how badly they had been punished. She knew she would enjoy it from the first sentence.

She managed to read all the way through to the tea party before she blinked, seeing she was sitting at a table, a gorgeous white gown and crown on her instead of her usual outfit. Looking to the head of the table and the chair beside hers she saw a sharply dressed Clockwork who was sipping his own tea while wearing a handsome black and purple suit that had a dash of steampunk aesthetic to it. A black hat was balanced on his head, smirk playing on his face as his legs were propped up on the table, staff leaning against his chair. "Ah, Jasmine, how lovely of you to join me."

"I have to know, just how did you manage this?" Jazz asked with a grin, blinking as a cup of her favorite tea hovered in front of her. Taking it with a smile she sipped as Clockwork only chuckled.

"Time never reveals his secrets, my dear."

"Fair enough, new question, who exactly am I?"

"I believe you would be the White Queen," Clockwork hummed, looking at the glimmering white crown on her head. "A rather fitting character for you to become." Jazz only smiled, happy to relax in the peace and quiet of the forest.

"You compliment in a such a way that I almost miss them. I'm impressed." At the grin she was given she only chuckled again, smirk playing on her own lips. "So here's an idea. Have you ever thought of a musical as punishment."

"Why Jasmine what a wicked idea...I'll have to remember it."

"I'm sure you will, Clockwork."

For those of you who read Guardian you know I ship Clockwork and Jazz, and really I hadn't /planned/ on Clockwork being the one behind it. I hadn't actually known what was going on until Jazz started laughing.