A/N: Posting a chapter that occurs during Christmas vacation at the beginning of September? Why not? ;) :P So, my dear Dead Poets, another chapter is here, dedicated with much love to my friend Nushka. Congratulations again, my friend, I wish that you will always be successful and happy in your life and that you will seize the day! :D I hope you will like the chapter, I gave my best...and I also included some "Harry Potter" and "Thief Lord" quotes for you, hehe!

Guest 1- Thank you so much for your review :) I love Pitts so freaking much, he's so adorable I can't even!

Guest 2- Thanks a lot, hope you will like the update :)

The title is taken from a verse from the song "Not Alone" by Red.

Disclaimer: I don't own DPS (boo-hoo)

"I like stories very much," the priest said. "They help me understand myself better."

(Simon Van Booy, "Love Begins in Winter: Five Stories")

Nellie's POV

Playing the piano helped me a lot; it distracted me from my quarrels with my father. Art always had that influence on me, regardless if it was music, literature or dancing. Virginia once had teased me, saying how someone so passionate about art had chosen to major in Law. To be honest, I was still wondering about why I had chosen this specific major myself—the answer 'Law is the family tradition' wasn't accepted. Except the wish to fight for justice and achieve balance in a field that was stigmatized by corruption, perhaps I also wanted to prove to myself that a girl could actually become a good lawyer, against the common belief that women had no business in a courtroom.

"Our timing is perfect." Alexander laughed, closing his History book and returning me to the family house in Medford. "I just finished too. So, what do you want us to do now? Maybe we could go for a walk, get some fresh air; and I really hope it will snow, you owe me a snowball fight."

"I haven't forgotten it; you should see the campus in Yale the day I left, it was basically a white blanket." I chuckled as I stood up to sit down next to him. "And a walk sounds pretty good to me; after all, staying all the time inside the house is both unhealthy and will drive us mad."

At this moment, though, the phone rang in the corridor, making us jump surprised, since we didn't expect anyone. Alexander immediately exited the living room with quick steps, telling Julia not to be bothered, because he would pick it up. I remembered that, when we were children, we were competing who would pick it up first, running across the house—our father always freaked out—and pushing each other to reach the phone. We really were carefree back then, before the damn society and our roles in it interfered and tore us apart.

"Hello, this is Alexander Russell," my brother greeted whoever it was politely, trying to give a more formal tone in his voice. "Who is it? Yeah, she's here, just wait a second, please. Thank you."

He said the 'Thank you' part in a sing-song voice that made me wonder who on earth it was to make him sound so cheerful and somehow sly. When he came in, he was grinning from ear to ear and stared at me for a few moments without saying anything, obviously trying to test my patience, something that reminded me of Virginia.

"Guess who it is!" he said in the end, snickering as if he was telling me a very entertaining joke.

"Santa Claus." I mocked him, also grinning, now really curious who had called us. But I wouldn't give my baby brother the satisfaction to give up so quickly.

"Nope, wrong guess. It's much better than Santa Claus."

"Leonardo da Vinci." I continued, mentioning my favorite artist from the Renaissance era.

"Ah, no, I doubt old Leonardo has a phone where he is." Alexander burst into fits of hysterical laughter. "No, no, no, only one more guess!"

"Ugh…Mr. Darcy from Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice!" I exclaimed teasingly, because, fictional character or not, I'd give anything to actually meet the specific man.

"No, no and no! Shall I tell you?"

"Yes!"

"Well…Let's say…It's your secret admirer."

"My what?" now it was my turn to laugh loudly, although I felt a blush spreading on my face. "What are you talking about? Who are you talking about, I don't have a secret admirer…at least none that I know of."

"Well, if you knew he admired you he wouldn't be a secret admirer, dummy!" Alexander commented, winked at me and laughed again, making me stare at him in disbelief; had someone spiked his water or something? Seriously, was he my brother or was it only some long-lost twin of his? My eyes widened in confusion, the complete opposite to him, who was a second before actually revealing the identity of the mysterious caller. Despite my curiosity, I didn't give in; two could play this game and, if Alexander wanted us to play twenty questions, then so be it. Besides, from his reactions and answers I could jump to a conclusion.

"Do I at least know him or is he a complete stranger?" I wanted to know, my playful smile mimicking his.

"Oh, you do know him…and very well, may I add." Alexander snickered, smirking from ear to ear and his hazel eyes having a mischievous spark I had never seen on him before.

Whoa, whoa, whoa…wait a minute!

Could he mean…?

Truth be told, even at the mere possibility that the phone call was from my best male friend, my playful smile turned into a happy one. It was still the beginning of vacation, but I was worried about him, wondering how the situation in his home was and remembering how confused and puzzled he looked when we said goodbye.

"Earth to Nellie!" Alexander snapping his fingers in front of my face. "You still here?"

"Yeah, yeah." I chuckled and ruffled his hair, to which he responded with a chuckle. "Alexander, seriously, if it's who I think it is, then I swear that the term 'secret admirer' has nothing to do—"

"We'll see," he replied with the same sing-song voice he had used previously. "Now go, he's waiting and he sounded very eager to talk to you."

Nodding and chuckling slightly, I jumped on my feet, ignoring Alexander's comment that I too seemed very impatient to talk to Mr. Mystery Caller. I grabbed the phone and pressed it to my ear, cursing myself mentally for actually hoping that it was him. Not that my brother's 'secret admirer' comment was true or anything, it was just that a guy so shy and laid-back like Pittsie wouldn't be so eager to call a girl, even if said girl had assured him he could call her anytime. So, I pushed the hope aside and spoke hesitantly, in case I was wrong or in case Alexander had played a very good prank on me.

"H-Hello?"

"Nellie?"

Warm, gentle voice with a hint of concern; it was definitely him. I could feel my face heating up and I was sure that the light pink on my cheeks had turned into a deep red. Instinctively, I smiled widely and suppressed a squeak of joy literally at the last minute. Being used in my friend's company, which calmed me down no matter the circumstances, I had to admit that I had missed him.

Damn you, Nellie, you sound like a love-stricken fifteen-year old.

No, another voice in my head disagreed, I sound like a girl who misses her buddy and who tries to hold on in a house with a father that treats her like a piece of furniture!

"Pittsie!" I exclaimed and, this time, I couldn't hold back the joy in my voice. "I'm so glad you called!"

"Yes, well, I wanted to see how you are," he answered with a small hesitation and I shook my head; even though we knew each other for a while, he still sounded as if he was a burden. "Hope I'm not disturbing you."

See? Told you.

"Not at all, I'm just chilling with my brother."

"Oh, yeah, how are things going? Everything okay?"

I remembered I had confided my worries about Alexander and me to him and how he had told me that it would go well. He was really willing to help his friends because he was honestly concerned for them, not because of some sick curiosity or something like that; a trait a huge number of people lacked in our days. That made me feel even more comfortable around him—although still not that confident to talk to him about my almost-marriage—but it was saddening me at the same time. He was so focused on helping us that he didn't want to speak about what was bothering him. He was a closed book, never revealing anything, despite the sadness and confusion I sometimes saw in his eyes.

"Everything's fine, don't worry. It's as if this estrangement between Alex and me never existed." I said. "Looks like you were right; the minute both of us relaxed we started behaving like true siblings."

"See? Told you it would be well," he commented and his voice was filled with genuine happiness that I was okay with my brother. "So, having fun in Medford or are you stuck with your college books?"

"Ah, nothing special, just studying, playing the piano a bit…tomorrow I'll visit my childhood friend, though, to learn what happened while I was away. And yourself? Don't tell me you're locked up inside your house for the whole day?"

"Well, it is quiet, actually, but I don't really mind. Reading a bit, listening to the radio, catching up with friends…"

He didn't really finish his sentence and, knowing him for a while already, I could clearly hear a hind of sadness in his voice and the silence that lingered all of a sudden. My mind travelled back, when I had found him next to the phone looking ready to burst out and I frowned. It was obvious, something serious had happened in his life, maybe it had passed, I couldn't know; but what I did know for sure was the fact that the aftermath was still painful for my friend. This tendency of his to block everything, to keep everything inside was worrying me, mostly because I was the same and I knew what it meant bottling your feelings up. On the other hand, of course, I didn't want to pressure him for more information, I had no right to interfere in his matters. If he ever wanted to speak, I would be there for him, but until then I should focus on simply being a good friend and making sure he wasn't uncomfortable around me.

"Nellie, is everything alright? You're very quiet," he spoke again. "Are you sure there's nothing troubling you?"

"Don't worry, it's nothing important…I'm the black sheep of the family, so I'm used to it." I decided to tell him the general concept without revealing specific information. It was the truth, basically; I was a girl and this meant a standard way of treatment by my father, especially if said girl was the complete opposite of the obedient daughter he wanted.

"Tell me about it," he left a sad laughter and it needed all my composure to stay calm; Pittsie, of all people, was considered the black sheep of his family? Seriously now? "Well, the only thing we can do is defend ourselves, right?"

"That's right; and have patience as well. It's only two weeks, don't forget that." I reminded him, voicing my own wish: the wish to return back to Yale, to my Law courses, to my friends, to being free and independent again.

"I am really looking forward to going back; believe me, Yale is the first place I've felt like home," he said and, the next second, a voice was heard from his end of the line. "Oh, Nellie, I have to go, my mother is calling me. So…have a good vacation and Merry Christmas. Seize the day while you can, okay?"

Seize the day? Now that's an advice I'm all too willing to follow! Honestly, how can you give an advice that fits perfectly in my situation…What on earth hurt you so badly?

"You too; and embrace the new year and whatever surprises it will bring. Oh, and something else, the most important thing!"

"Yes?"

"Hang in there, Gerard."

Pitts's POV

It wasn't a word I had never heard before; it was my own name, for God's sake! My parents and all of my relatives call me that, Meeksie too, although not so often and only when he wants me to get his point. But it was the first time Nellie had called me that. She always called me by my last name or 'Pittsie', the nickname that had been following me since my Welton days and which I didn't mind if it came from people I considered friends. I had accepted the fact that Nellie was calling me that, thinking it was another sign of our friendship; of the comfort we were feeling with each other. The sound of her saying my name, though, hit me harder than a natural disaster; probably because I wasn't expecting that. The second she uttered my name I felt shudders running down my spine, my face turned bright red and I smiled widely like some naïve schoolgirl. A soft gasp in my ear told me that Nellie was equally surprised, obviously because she herself wasn't planning it or because she was a great detective and had sensed my surprise.

Well, Knox had once said that accidental words are the most honest ones.

"Y-You called me by my first name." I stuttered, not really knowing what to say; what does someone say at a situation like that? I remembered my conversation with Charlie some minutes earlier, blushed even harder and cursed myself mentally; great, the last thing I needed was Nuwanda's words actually affecting me.

Of course, if Nuwanda was in my position he would find something witty to say. After all, Charlie is Charlie and the word 'awkwardness' doesn't exist in his vocabulary…quite the opposite from the down-to-earth and somewhat shy Nellie I knew.

"Well, that is your name, isn't it? Or did you introduce yourself to me with your pseudonym and you have a secret alias?" she asked teasingly and both of us burst out into fits of hysterical laughter, although Nellie turned serious again. "Unless you mind…"

"Not at all." I replied quickly; maybe a bit too quickly to convince her, so I went on. "Honestly, I don't mind at all; after all, we've known each other for months, so you could say it's overdue."

"Fair point." Nellie chuckled. "Anyway, I don't want to delay you, I'm sure your mother is waiting. Just…call whenever you want, alright?"

"Same goes for you, you know that."

After we said our goodbyes, I hung up and went to the living-room, still wearing that stupid smile on my face. It disappeared, though, when I noticed her serious and sad expression and I realized immediately that she had heard my conversation with my father. All this tension between us was taking its toll on her, I knew that; my father always wanted to toughen me, to make me emotionless because "emotions cloud your judgment"—his words, certainly not mine—while she was showing me in her own way that emotions aren't bad if you can control them; she was trying to help me open up more, explaining that expressing emotions isn't weakness. When Neil died and my father accused me of being a disgrace for this family and I was a wreck, grieving for my friend, the Dead Poets Society and the feeling of freedom we had felt in the Indian cave, my mother was there for me, consoling me when I had nightmares.

"Sorry about earlier, I did not mean to disrespect father," I told her now and lowered my head. I had meant every single word I had said to him, but my mother had nothing to do with it and I wouldn't put her in the middle.

"Respect is won, my boy, and you deserve your father's respect," she answered softly and I stared at her. "He should try to listen to you and your opinions, not trying to impose his on you. You are an adult and mature enough to know what you want."

"Well, apparently, I am still a child in his eyes, the same child that 'disobeyed him and make him seem like a fool' according to him." I bitterly commented; oh, yes, my father always 'praised' me like that. "He doesn't understand that I may be young, but I'm not completely stupid."

"I know that; and I also know that problems don't just disappear because you've got older. That case with your friend two years ago hurt you deeply; still hurts you and it is understandable," my mother sighed. "And instead of being there for you, your father's only worry was that you had broken the rules…It is my fault too, of course, I'm not talking and that's why he thinks I agree with him…"

"Nothing is your fault, mother, you're just trying to keep the balances here, I'm not blaming you for anything!" I assured her and sat next to her with a smile. "Believe me, I'm dealing with this, college and friends help me a lot."

"I'm so glad that you have friends there; was that a friend from Yale you were talking to earlier?" she wanted to know. "You seem relieved, as if something pleasant happened."

"Well, happiness can be found even in the darkest of times. If one only remembers to turn on the light."

Nellie's POV

The next evening, true to what I had said to Gerard and Alexander, I decided to visit Olivia. I hadn't seen my childhood friend in months and, except a few letters, we hadn't really communicated and I missed her a lot. After calling her and making sure that I wouldn't be a nuisance, I told her I'd go there at six and she had replied that the time was perfect, because her fiancé would also be there. To be honest, I still hadn't met Thomas Warren in person; I had only Olivia's opinion about him, which, of course, was really positive. Not that I had any reason to doubt my friend, but Olivia was always compromising, not resisting when she could; so, if her family had persuaded her that Thomas was the perfect match for her, then Olivia would believe them. Despite not having the same point of view, this had never gotten between our friendship, but now that I was a student, I really wanted to know how Olivia and her future husband were seeing married life: would the latter allow Olivia some personal space or was he one of those guys who insisted that a woman should be locked up inside her house?

That was why, when I rang her doorbell, I was both excited and nervous. Olivia opened the door and left a happy squeak when she saw me, embracing me tightly. I hugged her back; with all this tension back home, it felt good to see a friend I knew since I was ten.

"Nellie, welcome! I'm so happy to see you, it seems like forever! I thought you had forgotten us in Yale!"

"Not going to happen, Olivia," I laughed as I pulled away. "How could I ever forget my best friend who also happens to be about to marry?"

"Come in, come in, Thomas is already here."

I followed her into the living-room where a young man was sitting, although he jumped on his feet when he saw us. He was approximately twenty-two, twenty-three years old, with black hair, dark green eyes and a friendly smile. I smiled back at him and, as I shook his hand, I noticed the affectionate glance Olivia sent him. Well, the first conclusion was made: arranged marriage or not, she seemed to get along with him.

"Thomas, this is Nellie, my best friend and a dedicated student of Yale Law School. Nellie, this is Thomas Warren, my fiancé."

"Pleasure to meet you, Thomas."

"The pleasure is all mine, Nellie. I've heard many things about you from Olivia here."

We sat down and started a friendly and relaxed conversation. Thomas was kind and, when Olivia and I narrated him various events from our childhood, he looked really interested in what we are saying. I had expected him to be cautious towards me, considering me a bad influence for Olivia because of the fact that I wanted to study and later open my own law agency, but, thank God, that wasn't the case; both he and Olivia asked me questions about my life in Yale and my courses. I was happy to answer and we spent some time talking about college, although the subject soon changed to the upcoming wedding.

"So, when are you planning to marry?" I asked. "Soon?"

"Oh, we were thinking about Easter to tell you the truth, when you have vacation." Olivia explained. "After all, I can't marry without my maid of honor, right?"

"Maid of honor?" I repeated baffled as I smirked widely. "Are you serious?"

"Don't tell me you thought I'd choose someone else." Olivia shook her head, as if she was wondering how I could be so silly. "You were the only choice."

"I'd love to, thanks a lot." I eagerly nodded and turned towards Thomas. "Well, have you chosen your best man or are you keeping it as a surprise for me?"

"No, no, I've already chosen, although I haven't told him yet," he answered. "It will be my cousin Charlie, from my mother's family. He lives in another town so we don't have much contact, but I don't think he'll mind. You'll meet him soon enough, I'm sure…Just don't let him scare you."

"Why scare me, is he a ghost or something?" I raised my eyebrows.

"No, no, it's just that he sometimes makes some jokes that can be…misunderstood, so to say." Thomas said carefully.

"Oh, I don't mind that; believe me, I'm hearing worse at college…the consequences of being a girl in Law School I guess. So a few jokes won't bite me."

"See? I told you that she's more than capable to rely on herself. Besides, isn't your cousin the same age with her? I think they'll get along just fine." Olivia spoke before turning to me with a smile. "So, Nellie, you've told us about Yale, but the only things we've learned is about your courses and your friends…isn't there some nice young man you want to bring as an escort to the wedding?"

"Olivia!" I exclaimed and immediately felt my cheeks turning red. "I'm…I'm quite young for romance yet, I still want to get used in Yale first…not to mention that I don't feel ready for any relationship right now. Of course, I won't complain when that time comes and it will be wonderful to be with someone I love and who loves me back. It's just that I'm not searching for it; it's not my purpose."

"Well then, girl, I wish that, when the time comes, you'll marry the one you deserve."

I smiled at her, although I couldn't help but think that there was something missing from her wish.

The one you deserve…and the one you will choose!

A/N: Soooo, that was for now, my friends! Hope you liked the chapter and I can't wait for your reviews :) Hugs and love to all of you!