Negan had been up since dawn having spent the night somewhere between sleep and consciousness, his mind constantly turning over ideas and refusing to fully switch off. It was noon now although he hadn't left his room or even wanted to. He sat watching the clock on his wall, waiting for the second hand to tick to twelve before he turned the cap of the bottle, breaking the seal of the lid and deciding it was five o'clock somewhere.

There was a knock at the door, as expected, and he poured the freshly opened gin into two cut glass tumblers before calling, "come in."

Simon took a seat in his usual spot, his posture relaxed as he sank into one of the deep set armchairs with a satisfied grunt.

Negan pinched the tumblers together in one hand, in the other he carried the bottle before taking a seat opposite from Simon and passing him his drink. Gin, neat. "How did everything go with the Kingdom?"

"Good," he raised his glass before taking a sip and sinking even further into the chair. "The drop was full but you know what they can be like..."

Negan chuckled bitterly, taking a sip of his own gin. He knew exactly what Ezekiel's people could be like. But he could hardly blame them. If someone tried to take just one box of his supplies he would be crazier than a bear with a thorn in its paw. There's no way he could stand by and watch it happen week after week, even if it cost him his life.

Negan laughed again, he thought of Rae and the way she hadn't surrendered to Jacob despite the terrible odds of her people making it through to the end. She was willing to fight until her last breath. Just like him. The thought didn't exactly comfort him but thinking of Rae made the Matchstick Fort seem a milion miles away.

He nursed his glass, rolling it between his hands, he'd never been much of a gin man. He preferred scotch or a nice cool beer but anything was good when it had become as rare as a simple bottle of gin had become. Negan didn't know how long they sat together in comfortable silence, like two strangers at a gentleman's club, but it only seemed to make what he was about to say feel even more significant.

He stared out of the window where he could just about see his fence of dead that had once been a source of joy second only to Lucille but now it was an eyesore. He sighed taking a big gulp of the gin, it tasted bitter and slid down just as bitter as everything in this place seemed so fucking dull. From the grey walls to the empty faces to the faded sounds of his wives doing whatever the hell they did on the other side of the closed door.

Simon was the closest thing he had to a friend but despite that they would sit in silence like this until Negan decided what they would talk about and it was never more than surface level shit.

"I need you to do something for me," his gaze waited until Simon's caught up, "and I need you to keep it fucking discreet."

Simon laughed, "you know me."

He certainly did. "That's why I'm fucking telling you to keep things discrete."

Simon saluted with his lopsided grin, "whatever the hell you say boss."

Negan took a breath and downed the last of his gin. He wasn't sure why this felt so difficult except that it felt like the end of something and a shaky beginning of something else. "I want to get rid of my wives."

Simon leaned forward in his chair, the smile gone from his face, "you want me to kill 'em?"

Negan laughed. Hard. Any tension he'd been feeling heaved from his chest so loud that the whole sanctuary could probably hear. Jesus fucking Christ. Killing them would be the easy option. "No, I don't want them fucking dead. But when I tell them this shit show is over then I wanna be prepared. I don't want to be trapped in this room with five pissed off exes if you know what I fucking mean."

Simon laughed, relaxing back into his chair while Negan topped up both their glasses.

"I want you to find them all new rooms. Amber and Sherry can fucking share." No doubt they'd run right back to the boyfriends they'd thrown away for him and no doubt those dumbassess would welcome them back with open fucking arms.

"Kirsten." He took a shot of gin, his eyes hard, "let's get one thing goddamn clear about Kirsten. I want her as far as fuck away from me as humanly possible. I want her on the other side of the compound with Skinny Joey making sure she doesn't find her fucking way back here."

Simon snorted, "maybe I'll let her bunk with me. She might need a new sugar daddy to comfort those titties."

Negan knew Kirsten was the most obnoxious woman he'd ever met the second he spoke to her but he hadn't been planning on doing much talking. Out of all the wives she was the one that would give him the most trouble about a divorce. It wasn't that she gave two shits about him, it was that Kirsten loved nothing more than herself and she liked herself as Queen Bee. Divorcing her would put her back with the rabble and to Kirsten that would be a fate worse than death. "I don't care where the fuck you put her as long as I don't have to be within ear shot of it."

Negan could see the cogs turning behind Simon's crazy expression. "What about the others?"

"Sonya and Jennifer," he scratched his beard, he'd been thinking about those two all night. "They're good girls. Set 'em up with something nice." He'd had fun with them and he wanted to look after them still. "But like I say, I want this to be just between us until abso-fucking-lutely necessary."

Simon nodded with a shit eating grin. "So… are you moving the redhead in?"

"No." Negan kept his face even. He didn't want people, not even Simon, to think about Rae as anything more than a woman he liked to fuck. He didn't want them knowing that he gave a shit about anything because giving a shit was what made you weak. Throwing away his wives already felt like he was giving up some power, the power to be the King Dick with five women in his bed, it created an image that people could follow whether they agreed with it or not.

"Why then?"

"I'm getting rid of my wives because I can't stand a single fucking one of them." It was too honest so he added, "I don't need to be married to find decent pussy and I'm not gonna marry every last chick I wanna fuck." Having a harem of desirable women didn't seem so exciting anymore, neither did owning Dwight's scrawny ass. Dwight could have Sherry, she was a shit lay and boring as fuck to talk to - if she ever opened her mouth to say anything.

"Alright, whatever you want Boss," Simon downed his drink and stood up. "Anything else?"

"Yeah, if you see that prick Donnie send his ass to my office." Fuck, if Negan was going to be responsible then so could that little fucker.

/

From the second they left the house Rae felt the tension silently sitting between herself and Tim. She could see it in the way he squared his shoulders with his eyes never quite meeting hers and his words limited to 'yes', 'no' or a barely audible grumble.

She could have left Tim at the farm and taken Negan's men on today's scavenging hunt and in the future she probably would. But today Rae needed to do what she should have done before, talk to Tim. The tension that lingered between them had sat at the dinner table last night and an awkward breakfast this morning. It wasn't fair to everyone else and there was no avoiding each other when they lived in a community of less than thirty.

They pulled up at a daycare, the multicoloured lettering faded in the sun and the doors still locked up tight. They needed supplies for Carly's baby and anything else that might be useful but more than anything she needed a place away from home and any real danger where they could talk without a million ears listening. Tim jimmied the door with a crowbar, the noise didn't seem to disturb any halfers that might have been waiting inside but after scavenging with Negan she knew better than to be complacent.

Rae stepped in first, her knife at the ready, her breathing slowed to silence as her ears pricked for any and every noise.

Nurseries always had that same smell; paint, playdough, little boys urinals and school dinners. It took her back to the time when she started her very first day at kindergarten and if she closed her eyes she could almost conjure the memory that Zuzu would never have. She sighed tracing one fingertip along a display wall filled with hundreds of painted handprints. All different colours cut out of card and stapled down like a rainbow. On the other wall was framed photos of staff members, all of them women and all sporting that same cheesy smiles that said 'I love kids'.

"Tim," she said, glancing away from the photos and trying to work up the courage to say something more.

She could feel him looking at her and in his silence she could tell he knew, without a single word, what it was she wanted to talk to him about. "I know you don't like Negan, I get it but he's in my life now and I-"

Tim snorted, when she looked at him his face was twisted, "don't tell me you're in love with him!"

Was that what she wanted to tell him? Was that what she felt for Negan, a man she'd known for less than two months. Maybe it was. "I care about him. I think that-"

Tim surged forward, stopping short of colliding into her but close enough that she could feel the heat of his anger. "I thought you'd know better! I thought you'd figure out what he was on your own. Haven't you learned anything? You can't trust him Rae."

"He helped us when we needed it. He's brought us food, men, he'll bring us more."

"Do you know how he talks about you when you're not there? The things he says?" His rage looked more like pity now, "I didn't want to tell you because I don't like to even think about women like that."

Her heart sank, "what did he say?"

"He says you're just nice pussy that he wants to fuck. And judging from the look on his face last night, you gave him exactly what he wanted."

Her cheeks flared red, her denial kicked in, "it's not like that."

"Jesus Rae, are you that stupid? Do you really think he cares about anything but himself? He's got what he wants from you just like he probably gets it from every other woman he meets out there."

She could feel tears swelling in her throat but she swallowed them down. Tim was only saying every single thing she feared about Negan but her heart refused to believe it.

"I'm sorry Rae," Tim's voice was softer, his hand reached for her shoulder but she pulled away. "I'm not trying to hurt you." He pulled his glasses off his nose, and pressed his fingers against his eyes with a heavy sigh before he looked at her. "Do you remember when everything went to hell and I showed up at your apartment? I helped you find your sister and Zuzu then got you guys to your Grandma's house."

She'd been a mess, she'd watched an old school friend die right before her eyes and had barely been able to talk let alone think. "Yes."

"God Rae, I went to you. You over everyone because I... I was in love with you, even then. Jesus Christ!" he leaned his hand on the wall, not quite looking at her, "I've loved you for years."

"I..." she didn't know what to say, there wasn't an easy way of telling someone you didn't love them back, she sheathed her knife. "Tim-"

He reached for her again, his hand cupping her cheek, his breathing more agitated, "and now... I have to watch another man putting his hands all over you. Do you have any idea what that's like? Its disgusting!"

Rae felt fire flare in her belly, her shoulders squared, Miguel had told her she was a whore for having a relationship with Jacob. She wasn't going to let Tim make her feel that way about Negan. "I didn't ask you to love me Tim. Yes, you helped me but that was your choice. I don't owe you anything!"

Tim didn't answer, he grabbed her. His grip painfully tight on her arms as he slammed her against the wall of handprints, the back of her head taking a blow that made her dizzy. "Ti-" she tried to reason with him but his lips crushed against hers, his tongue forcing between her teeth.

Rae pushed against him but the weight of his body pinned her tight to the wall. She reached to strike his face but he caught her wrist, slamming it against her head as her other hand squeezed around his neck with as much force as she could find. He weakened and her knee bent, landing on his crotch in one hard shove.

Tim released her, collapsing to his knees, his eyes watering as he cupped his hand over his jeans.

"What the hells wrong with you?" She shouted, her own eyes streaming with tears.

She wanted nothing more than to run to the car and drive all the way to Negan's men and send for him but anything she might have done was irrelevant when the sound of a gun cocking seemed to echo from every wall.

Rae's heart stopped beating, her hand instinctively reached for her glock but it was too late. There was already a barrel pointed at her head, the shine of the muzzle catching her eye as a man stepped through the door Tim had jimmied open.

"Put you hands in the air," the man drawled but her hand kept onto her glock, her heartbeats creeping back in as she wondered if she could be fast enough, if she could pull her gun and duck behind a nearby bookcase.

"Y'all better do what he says," another voice commanded, her attention glancing down the hallway to where two men stepped from a side room, blocking any chance she might have had at escaping.

Her heart beats were relentless now, her breaths desperate pants as her mind tried to think of an option that was better than surrender. Negan wouldn't surrender but Negan wouldn't be out here on his own either. Why hadn't she brought his men?

"Are you Rachel Honey?" the first man said. Jacob's men she decided, her head whipping back around to look at him, his revolver held out straight, no hesitation and the look in his eyes as cold as ice.

"How do you know my name?" she said, her voice surprisingly even despite the fear that wanted to cry and collapse into a heap on the floor.

"A friend." His stance relaxed, the gun never wavered but she felt hope. "He told me you were good people. The kind of people I can trust."

"What friend?"

His eyes narrowed, his jaw tightening before he nodded to her gun, "put your weapon on the ground and we'll talk."

Rae looked over her shoulder to the other men who had inched closer, making her even more certain she could do nothing but do exactly what they wanted. Even if she wanted to fight Tim was already placing his gun on the floor. She pulled her glock from her belt, slowly, her eyes burrowing into Tim. If she hadn't decided to come out here with him, if he hadn't attacked, a million of if's and maybe she wouldn't have been in this situation.

"Now kick it to my friend," she did, it slid across the linoleum easily.

"Knife too," the straggly haired man ordered, his accent even thicker than the first mans.

Rae bit her tongue, her eyes glancing between all the men as she pulled her knife free and did as told with irritated reluctance. When she was disarmed, she demanded, "who are you people?"

The first man lowered his gun, his eyes shining with softness, as if he was relieved things had gone so easily for him, "my names Rick Grimes."

A/N- Thank you for reading and to everyone who has followed and especially those of you who have taken the time to leave me feedback over the last few chapters. You guys rock and keep me writing when I'm having trouble finding the words! xoxo