Devastated. It was the only way to describe how she felt in that moment. She'd dressed up, taking longer than usual, putting forth more effort than usual because she wanted to look pretty for Jane. Just because it wasn't a romantic date didn't mean Maura couldn't flaunt herself a little bit. She was surprised more than anything to discover that Jane had tickets to the symphony. Tickets that she actually planned on using. But what really floored her is that Jane asked her to come along. Her. Not Agent Dean, not Casey, not any other guy or friend or guy friend. Her.
She'd done it in her typical goofball fashion, overplaying it with the exaggerated fluttering of her eyelashes, the over-the-top, down on one knee presentation of the tickets. But Maura's heart soared at the gesture regardless. She'd scampered off to find a brand new dress, one that clung to her curves and oozed class, and of course new heels had to go with it.
She felt like those teenage girls in those cheesy movies, getting ready for prom with their high school sweethearts. The 'butterflies' in her stomach, as Jane would call them, hadn't gone away. Until she'd walked up to the homicide unit and found Casey and Jane talking, heads bent closely together. The butterflies stopped cold.
She couldn't tell what was being said, but if Jane was still calm, if she wasn't throwing Casey out, then they were probably attempting to mend their relationship. A relationship that would edge Maura out of the picture of Jane's life soon enough. Her chest tightened and a lump formed in her throat. The smile dropped from her lips and the sparkle in her eyes dimmed to a drab gray.
Suddenly she didn't want to be there anymore. She didn't want to be wearing the off the shoulder, cream slip with black floral lace covering dress. She didn't want to be in the stunning heels she'd agonized over purchasing. Anywhere else, that's where she'd rather be. In her morgue performing an autopsy, cool and confident in her scrubs. In her home, feeding Bass some strawberries in what she classified as her 'lounge wear'.
Anywhere but watching the most harmful romantic relationship Jane had ever been in, being coaxed back into existence.
She shuddered out of her frozen state, spun on her heel, and fled to her car. Halfway to her house, Jane called.
"Isles," she declared, even though she knew that Jane knew she knew it was her.
"Hey, Maur, where are you hiding? I thought you were okay with coming with me tonight?"
Maura breathed deeply, trying to calm herself yet at the same time answer without lying. "I'm in my car headed home. I didn't think you required my services for the rest of the evening."
"Your services?" Jane gawked, confused. "Maur, I thought we were going to the symphony."
Clearly Jane wasn't going to make this easy for her. "We were, Jane, but I thought it was quite clear that you'd have a different date for tonight, given your recent visitor."
"Are you talking about Casey?" she asked, surprised.
Maura rolled her eyes, a habit she'd picked up from the detective. "Yes."
A brief pause. "Maur, you know we're not getting back together, right?"
Maura pulled over. She stopped the car, afraid her sudden onslaught of emotion might cause her to wreck. "You're not?"
A chuckle. "No, Maur. And besides, I made this date with you. I wouldn't ditch you for a guy; I thought you'd know that by now," her voice lilted into sadness near the end.
Wiping away at her eyes, Maura put the car back in drive. "I'll be there in ten minutes. Pick you up outside?"
"Okay," Jane laughed. "But I'm still the guy!"