Heavy Lies The Crown: Chapter Eight
by Starrify
The rhythm of my footsteps crossing flatlands to your door have been silenced forevermore.
And the distance is quite simply much too far for me to row; it seems farther than ever before.
I need you so much closer.
After a week of staying with the two Hawke siblings and Shinn, Cagalli found herself bored. It wasn't that she had nothing to do, but she really had nothing to do. She would often request to go around, but Lunamaria only allowed her to go outside the house if Shinn was with her. She wanted to go back to the library because her visit was cut short last time, but she couldn't ask Shinn to go with her because it was still so awkward between the two of them. Thankfully, though, he hadn't spilled her identity to anyone else.
So now she was stuck in her small room yet again. The feeling of entrapment was just as bad as when she was in the safe house. Maybe even worse because at least there she had Kisaka and Erica; here, she barely saw the two siblings because they were working downstairs.
Suddenly there was a knock on her door and she stood up in excitement. Then, she groaned at herself—she felt like a dog anticipating its master to feed it. Cagalli didn't like the comparison at all.
"Miss Cagalli," Meyrin's shy but high voice called for her. "I'm sorry if I'm disturbing you or something—"
"No," Cagalli responded immediately. "Meyrin, you're not disturbing me at all!"
Meyrin was startled at the blonde's loud outburst, but recomposed herself quickly. "I'm sorry, maybe it's not the best time to ask you this since you're still supposedly recuperating, but could you possibly do me a favor? Shinn and Luna are both out and I need someone to buy me a few ingredients for this concoction I've already started. I can't leave it unattended, you see, or else I might end up burning the house, but I need the ingredients as soon as possible or else the batch I'm making right now would turn into waste."
Cagalli smiled at the younger girl. She was a few years younger than her, but she was smart—after all, she was the one making the elixirs and different medicines they were dispensing in the apothecary they handled. "Of course, Meyrin. I don't mind at all."
The young redhead was relieved at this. "Thank you so much, Miss Cagalli!"
Cagalli grabbed her cloak—the one Aisha made for her—and followed Meyrin down the stairs to their shop. There, Meyrin gave her a basket and a small parchment of paper where a few names of herbs were written down.
"Bark of cinchona tree, nettle weeds, rose petals, thyme leaves…" Cagalli went on to read the small list. "Meyrin, I don't know what half of these things are. How will I know if I got the right herbs?"
"There's a stall in the market which is owned by a guy named Vino. Vino Dupre, he has weird hair. Just give him the list and tell him that I sent you! He'll offer a discount." Meyrin dropped a small pouch in the basket; Cagalli assumed it had the money she was going to use to pay for the herbs. "Once you go out of the house, you turn right then straight. Once you reach the fountain, you'll know that's the center of the town. The market is on the left side. Please come back as soon as you can!"
Meyrin ran to the backroom and left Cagalli standing in the middle of their shop. She just nodded dumbly and dragged herself out to the street where the sun was shining brightly, the children were playing along the street, and a few carriages passed by the center of the small road every now and then. It was a refreshing sight since all Cagalli could see from her window was the wall of the house beside theirs.
But now that she was outside, it was just so beautiful. Maybe it was because she was stuck in her room for the past few days, but there was something to the city that she found captivating. It fascinated her in a different way from how the forest appealed to her every time she left her little den. The city, it was different.
It reminded her of Orb.
This was the same sight she saw so often before and she missed it dearly, but Cagalli shook her head from old visions of her home. She was on a quest of sorts, and that was to return back to the apothecary with the herbs Meyrin had asked for. It was the least she could do for their hospitality.
As she walked further into the city, she began to think that perhaps this was the life Kisaka and her father had wished for her—something peaceful and banal in a small town. It was a nice change of pace from all the running she did in the forest and the occasional thievery she attempted at the trade route which led to even more running. But that was all she knew. She's been running her whole life.
And now that it seemed to stop, she wanted to stay where she was. To stay in place and just watch the world move on. Forget everything she's learned and start over. She was no princess here in Plant, and maybe it was for the better that she would never have to be a princess again.
No! Cagalli scolded herself mentally. How could you even think about abandoning Orb?
Then, her father's words replayed themselves in her head.
"Remember her ideals, Cagalli. You carry the name of Athha, so you must never lose sight of them. If you do so, then we would have lost all hope of recovering Orb."
It still hurt her to remember how she had lost her father so quickly that she hadn't gotten the chance to properly say goodbye. It wasn't fair; she thought they were happy, that the kingdom was content—but everything spiraled downward after the coup d'etat by the Seirans, and Cagalli was bent on avenging her kingdom.
Lost in thought while walking in the middle of the road, Cagalli didn't even notice a rider speeding opposite her direction. The horse was a few meters away and was slowing down too slowly that Cagalli would've been hit with a great force if she didn't sidestep—and trip herself in the process.
"Oof," she groaned as she hit the ground, the basket rolling a meter away from her. The hood of her cloak fell to her shoulders and she saw the rider stop and dismount his horse to run towards her.
"We have to stop meeting like this," a voice chuckled above her. From below, Cagalli could only see a big horse and a cloaked rider. He stood against the light of the day, so there was no way for her to identify the rider who had caused her to fall. There were also other people who were looking at her with concern as she did fall to the ground, but when the rider of the horse offered her his gloved hand, the bystanders carried on with their lives. "Really, this is the third time we've met and you're still on the floor."
Cagalli glared at the stranger. How dare he insult her? But he spoke with her as if he were acquainted with her, and while his voice did sound familiar, she could not simply place it.
"I'm sorry," Cagalli muttered, accepting the stranger's hand. Even his touch was familiar. "I'm not sure if I know you."
He was still holding her hand even when she was already standing. Cagalli was trying to subtly pull her hand away from his grip, but his clutch on her was too strong. After a while, it just started to irritate her, and it seemed to have the opposite effect for the stranger.
"Okay, listen, you creep—and listen well because I am not going to repeat myself. Thank you for helping me stand up, but I don't think I should even be thanking you because you're the reason I fell down in the first place. So if you could just let go of my hand and go to wherever you were originally heading, I'd very much appreciate it because I also need to get going."
But the stranger still wasn't letting her go.
"Cagalli," the guy said and raised his other hand to pull back his cloak slightly. "It's me."
The blonde princess gaped at the blue-haired prince.
"Athrun!"
Cagalli began to scold herself. She had called the prince of the kingdom she was in right now, a creep. He proved to be quite perverted the first time they met in the forest, when he had to take off his top for her to help clean his wound, but still. This was his kingdom she was currently in and she very well knew how commoners are required by law to show their respect for the royals.
She blinked quite a few times, but the sight of messy dark blue fringes didn't go away. She was currently standing dumbstruck and could only think of one thing that commoners immediately do when they see someone from the royal family.
"I am so sorry for telling you off earlier, your highness," she said softly, inaudible to anyone else other than the two of them, while on her knees. The sight of a girl kneeling in front of a man on the street startled other passersby and they stopped, ready to aid a vulnerable lass if need be.
Athrun, aware of the attention she was gathering, also knelt down and said loudly, "What was that you lost? I think I saw something roll over a while ago in that direction."
Cagalli stared at him. "What are you doing?"
"Oh, is that so? I'll escort you to wherever you're going as compensation for making you fall earlier!" Athrun replied ecstatically and helped her back up to her feet—again. The small crowd that had gathered didn't find anything else to be suspicious and so continued to walk on. Letting out a sigh of relief, Athrun pulled Cagalli closer to him and began to walk to his horse.
"Hey, what gives?" Cagalli glared at him. Inside, though, she could feel her heart thumping rather strongly. No, stop it; Lunamaria just fed my brain all these inane thoughts about having a crush on the prince of Plant when in actuality I don't feel anything for him at all!
"I'm trying to be in disguise here, Cagalli." He told her, and the blonde could feel her heart fluttering at the sound of her name—again. "The prince usually isn't supposed to make unexpected visits to cities, but I came here to see how you've been doing. The last time I saw you, you weren't really in your best state."
Cagalli tried to recall the events of the day he found her, but her mind must have been too hazy from her fever. She could remember running away from the safe house, falling, seeing his eyes, and then waking up in Plant. It was all such a blur in her head.
"Well?" Athrun had let go of her wrist and was now looking at her with a soft smile. He looked so different from the guy who had chased her into the forest weeks ago. "Aren't you getting on the horse?"
"I'm not sure if I'm well enough to be on a steed again," she said honestly. Lunamaria would throw a fit if she found out that Cagalli had left the house by herself—what more if Lunamaria found out that she rode a horse? "And besides, I'm only headed to the market. It shouldn't be that far."
Athrun nodded understandingly. "Alright. I passed the market on the way here, and it's only a ten-minute walk away."
Cagalli wasn't sure what to say—or do, because she was with the freaking prince, of all people. And well, he was with the exiled princess of Orb, but no one else in Plant other than Shinn knew that, so she supposed he didn't particularly think of how he was acting with her. So instead she nodded back at him and walked, not looking back at him.
But what Cagalli didn't know was that Athrun was more nervous to meet her than he would be when meeting members of the Supreme Council. He had been preparing a small speech in his head earlier when he decided to take the two-hour horse ride all the way to Februarius City, but he didn't expect to literally bump into her while on the way to the apothecary, and when he saw her again, he forgot all that he wanted to say. He didn't understand how she did so, but she did. She was the only one who could make him so speechless with just one look from her amber eyes.
He wasn't exactly sure what he was thinking when he went off in his horse so early in the morning. He had finished most of his paperwork yesterday. He left the small stack that was left, on his desk with a note to Kira for him to finish. It was the beginning of recruitment season for Zaft, and besides from the annual thousands who wanted to join the military forces of Plant, they had to find ways to recruit more because of his father's intention to start a war against Orb. They had at least a hundred application forms handed in—and as Athrun was the son of the commander-in-chief of the Zaft forces, he was technically second in command, and thus had to review all the applicants because the King was too busy to do so.
But why was he thinking about Zaft? He was with Cagalli now. He had been longing to be back at her side since he had left her in the clinic all bruised and bloodied, though he couldn't place where his compulsion to be with her was stemming from. When he first met her, he wanted to kill her—or at least, to hurt her. But the circumstances of their meeting were different. Now, they were sort of friends.
Friends who weren't talking as they walked to the market.
Athrun couldn't think of anything to tell her. Soon enough, they reached the fountain and just as Meyrin had instructed Cagalli, the market was to the left of it.
"Excuse me," Cagalli stuttered to say to a lady behind one of the stalls. Athrun could tell that she was having difficulty interacting with strangers here in Plant. "Do you know where I could find the stall owned by Vino Dupre? He had weird hair."
"Oh, you mean the skunk?" the lady replied. "His stall's at the back. Turn right then left."
"Turn right then left," Cagalli repeated. "Thank you."
Cagalli started walking in the direction the lady pointed out, almost forgetting that Athrun was there behind her.
"Hey!" Athrun called out. Cagalli stopped in her tracks and looked at him pointedly. "I can't bring my horse inside the market."
"I suppose you'll have to wait out here," Cagalli said with a glare. Really, he was such a bother. Though she knew that she should be more expressive of her gratitude because he was the one to have rescued her and brought her to an infirmary, but it's not like she asked for him to save her. She wasn't a damsel in distress. She took care of herself for five years and did well enough on her own. She didn't need anyone else—not before and certainly not now. "I'll be back."
Athrun sighed in defeat and leaned back on one of the trees. Aegis, his horse, was drinking from the fountain. I don't love her, he thought again to himself. But what else could he be feeling? Gratitude, perhaps, for the feisty blonde who led him back home. That must have been it, but there was something stronger that his heart was trying to tell him. Something he wasn't sure if he was ready to accept or not, but he felt something for Cagalli. And it terrified him.
Cagalli was back with a basket full of jars that contained all the things in Meyrin's list. As soon as Athrun saw the heavy load she was carrying, he took the basket from her.
"I can carry it just fine!" she argued, trying to get the basket back from him. "Hey, give it back!"
"You're not supposed to be carrying heavy things," Athrun reprimanded her as if he was some doctor. He hung the basket to the horse's side and Aegis shifted its legs to adjust to the weight. "Now, get on the horse. We could get back to the apothecary faster on Aegis."
The blonde glared at him, showing that she was obviously not pleased. Athrun frowned.
"Come on. Don't be too stubborn; I'm only trying to help you."
Her gaze softened—it was true, after all. He had done nothing but try to help her. And she didn't mean to act so cold to him; it was just that she didn't know how else to act. She thought she was never going to see him again as he was the prince and she was just some pariah who attempted to steal a ring from him. But he rescued her—twice. And so technically the whole of Orb would have been in gratitude to him.
"Alright," she said and walked closer to his horse. "But I'm not sharing with you."
He smiled, remembering their short journey out of the forest. She had offered him to ride on her horse with her because she had injured him. He gave her his hand to assist her up his horse. "I wouldn't have it any other way, princess."
She retracted her hand and held her breath. Did he know? No, he couldn't possibly know. He did call her that before, in the forest, but still, she was still very paranoid about anyone other than those in the safe house calling her that.
Athrun blinked at her—and adorably so. "Did I say something wrong?"
"No, just…don't call me that."
"Princess? But aren't you one? You have a whole kingdom of your own. The forest, right? Isn't it under your rule or something like that?"
Cagalli mounted the horse and positioned herself. She gave an awkward laugh as he continued to stare at her. "Yeah, sure. Let's just go."
Their walk back to the apothecary was just as silent as the walk to the market. Looking up, Athrun could see that Cagalli did recuperate well enough. In fact, from this distance, she didn't look like she was injured at all. Maybe under her cloak were the bruises she had gotten, but overall, she still looked like the same girl he had met in the forest. The same one he didn't believe was real until he saw her again.
He was expecting the trip to the apothecary to be even longer than their trip to the market, what with the silence between them, but they were in front of the shop in no time. She dismounted his horse without any help from him, and took the basket and ran inside the store, leaving him outside and staring dumfounded at the small wooden door.
"I'm so sorry if I took too long, Meyrin!" she shouted once the door closed behind her. The younger Hawke sibling came out from the back room and smiled delightedly at the sight of the blonde with the basket of herbs.
"No, no. You're just in time actually," she said, taking the basket. "Thank you so much, Cagalli!"
"Cagalli!" The older Hawke sibling came running down the stairs with Shinn trailing behind her. "Oh, thank the gods that you're alright! What was Meyrin thinking, letting you just go out on your own? If our parents found out that we let you out without someone with you, they'd kill us! Worse, what if the prince found out? Then we might have been imprisoned in a dungeon or something!"
"No one here is going to be imprisoned in a dungeon or something." With Lunamaria's loud and rushed babbles, none of them noticed that someone else had entered the shop. Athrun put down the hood of his cloak. "But thank you for taking care of Cagalli."
Lunamaria and Meyrin stared at him. Blue hair and emerald eyes—there was only one person left in this kingdom with such traits and he was even more gorgeous than the descriptions other girls had shared.
"Your highness!" they both cried and simultaneously bowed. They looked at each other and glared, both aware that they were competing for the prince's attention.
"Rise," Athrun commanded. "There is no need for such formalities. I'm not really that much of a prince right now; I had just wanted to visit your ward here."
Cagalli was even more irritated with him now. "I'm not their ward!"
Athrun turned and acknowledged the younger black-haired man who was saluting to him. He saluted back and gave a small amused smile. "Now, why are you saluting me?"
"I applied for Zaft, Sir!" Shinn answered stiffly. "And as the prince, you hold the second highest position and must be given due respect, Sir."
Cagalli rolled her eyes. Shinn knew that she was the princess of Orb but he didn't seem to care for her at all.
"All the applicants for this year are still being reviewed. Those who got accepted will be announced next month, and training doesn't start for a few weeks after that," Athrun told him. "You seem to be over-excited…"
"Shinn Asuka, Sir!" Shinn offered his name. "I'm sixteen years of age and was from Orb."
"Orb? My best friend was from Orb and he's also in Zaft," Athrun frowned. If his father did continue with his plan to invade Orb, Kira and Shinn would have to fight against their own kingdom. But he couldn't divulge anything else to anyone right now. "I'm the one who gives the final say in accepting applicants, so I'll look out for your name, Shinn."
Shinn smiled. "Thank you, Sir!"
Athrun turned to face the two redheads. "Do you mind if I took Cagalli out? I'm sure she'd like to see more of Februarius."
"We—" Meyrin began to say, but Lunamaria cut her off.
"We don't mind at all, Prince Athrun!"
Cagalli frowned. "Don't I have a say in this?"
Athrun grinned and the Hawke siblings tried their best not to faint at the sight of the dashing prince. "I suppose you do. Would you like me to take you around Februarius, let you see the museum filled with dead, preserved animals? Or would you rather take the one-hour trip to the renowned beaches of Martius and get there in time to watch the sunset?"
"If you're not going, then I am," Lunamaria whispered, winking.
"Fine," Cagalli groaned, shaking her head at the giggling redhead. "I'll just change my clothes upstairs."
"I also need to replace your bandages before you leave, Cagalli," Lunamaria told her and followed her up the stairs, leaving Meyrin, Shinn, and Athrun in the apothecary downstairs.
Suddenly, a small thunderous roar was heard from the back room.
"Oh no, my concoction!" Meyrin cried and ran to the back room with her basket.
Now it was just Shinn and Athrun left in the shop.
"Prince Athrun, can I get you anything?" Shinn stepped forward. "Water or tea or perhaps biscuits?"
"It's fine, Shinn. You can just call me Athrun," the prince told him kindly. "And don't call me Sir yet either. Not till you're officially a part of Zaft."
Shinn nodded awkwardly, finding it weird to have the prince of a kingdom let him be addressed so informally. "Athrun, if you don't mind me asking, were you the one to bring Cagalli to Plant?"
Athrun nodded back. "I brought her to the hospice managed by the doctors Hawke in Aprilius when she was injured. She had a fever and fell off her horse, so I brought her there. I had asked her to be transferred elsewhere to recover, but I had not expected it to be so far away."
"Do you even know who she is?" Shinn asked, his voice wavering ever so slightly.
"No." Athrun shook his head. "All I know is that her name is Cagalli Yula—she had introduced herself the first time we met. But I don't know anything else about her. Not even her birthday or where she's from."
Despite ignoring Cagalli since he found out that she was the princess of Orb, Shinn did actually care for the blonde. Over the past few days, he had been thinking and realized that she was the only person who can bring Orb back to how it was before. He was still bitter, yes, but he knew he couldn't do anything about both of their circumstances. He accepted that now, but his pride wouldn't let him apologize to her.
Maybe it's for the better that you don't know anything about her, Shinn thought, looking at the blue-haired prince. If the princess's identity was exposed to the royals of Plant, who knew what would happen to her—and consequently, Orb?
"What about you, Shinn? Do you know who she is?" Athrun asked, his eyebrows slightly furrowed at the enigma that was Cagalli. "She must have told you guys more things than I know now—which is almost nothing, really."
"No," he lied. "I don't really know anything about her either."
"She's ready!" Lunamaria shouted from the top of the stairs. She walked ahead and pulled Shinn behind Athrun.
Cagalli appeared from the stairs and was frowning. She was wearing a red half-coat, white slacks and her riding boots—which Cagalli was alright with wearing, but Lunamaria insisted on fixing her hair and even putting ribbons. As she was walking down the stairs, she was mumbling curses, but that didn't deter Athrun from smiling at her affectionately.
When Cagalli caught Athrun's stare, she asked irritably, "What are you staring at?"
"You," Athrun answered simply, amused at how cute she was when she was infuriated. Cagalli groaned, trying to pull out the ribbons in her hair but they were tied too tightly and hurt more with every attempt to remove them. Athrun continued to smirk and turned to the Lunamaria and Shinn. "I'll make sure she's back as soon as possible."
Then, he faced Cagalli again. The blonde was fumbling at her sleeves awkwardly and he found it adorable. She didn't find it too amusing, but she grinned anyway.
"Hey, pretty boy. Are you going to keep staring at me like I'm from space or are you going to let me go?"
She wasn't expecting to be crying—especially not in front of him, of all people—but she was. It wasn't that it wasn't beautiful, because it was really such a sight to behold. It just reminded her of the sunsets on the beaches of Orb, the same ones she'd often go look at with her father from the high tower in their castle. It didn't seem like too long ago that they were laughing despite the cold stony walls, but it was. She was all grown up now, and she knew that she'd never get the chance to do those things—or anything, for the matter—with her father.
Uzumi Nara Athha. Even if her dreams told her that the king of Orb wasn't really her biological parent, he would always be the only father for her.
"Cagalli." Athrun's voice brought her back to reality, and instead of the grey castle walls, she saw his face against the purpling sky. "Is anything the matter?"
"No," she lied, wiping her eyes with the sleeves of her jacket. "Some sand must have blown into my eyes."
"Alright," Athrun said and went down the horse. They had been riding in complete silence for the past hour and while he had wished that they would be able to converse more, he was content with simply being with her. "This is one of the famed beaches of Martius; soft white sand and the clearest waters—although you can't see that it's clear right now because it's already nearing dusk."
She gave a soft smile as he helped her down his steed. "It looks just like the ones in Orb."
Athrun blinked at her. Had he just been given a hint to who she was? "You're from Orb?"
Realizing what she had just admitted, Cagalli's eyes widened. He looked surprised, too, but probably for different reasons, she concluded. She'd let him know a few things, sure, but he didn't need to know the whole truth.
"I grew up in Orb," she told him as she began to take off her boots. She wanted to feel the sand at her feet—or maybe she just wanted it to feel like home again. Athrun tied his horse to a nearby tree and together they walked closer to the shoreline. "The beaches near my home had rougher sands than this, but the water had a lot of fishes. Sometimes, you can just sit there and wait and dolphins would be jumping seemingly out of nowhere."
"That sounds beautiful," Athrun commented with a smile. "I don't remember ever having gone to Orb. I was eleven when the war against the Alliance and Plant ended and the years that followed were difficult what with Mother's death and negotiations. I wish in between the end of the war and the siege of Orb, I could have gone and seen it."
Her heart clenched every time he mentioned Orb, but she knew that it must hurt him some way, too, to mention his deceased mother.
"I can barely remember what happened in those few years after Mother died," Athrun continued to narrate. At this point, Cagalli left her shoes somewhere and they were now walking along the long stretch of sand. She listened to what stories he had to tell because she figured she owed him more than that. "Father became an empty shell and barely saw me. He did his best to get treaties settled between the two kingdoms. I suppose that's what happens when you lose someone you love the most."
The way his emerald eyes stared into her own, unsettled Cagalli—but at the same time it made her stomach feel light and tingly.
"I don't want to lose anyone I love."
"You mean to say your fiancée?" Cagalli tried her best to sound neutral about it, but there was no helping the slight hint of bitterness.
Athrun didn't catch onto that, though. "Yes, I love her dearly, but just as a friend. The one she truly loves is my best friend—there's no denying that."
There was a moment of slight confusion as they both just looked at each other. Cagalli wondered what he meant, why he was looking at her the way he was. Athrun was still thinking of the same thing since he had first parted ways with her—who was she? Why did she have to matter so much to him?
"I lost the person I loved the most," she said, averting his gaze. He frowned as she walked on ahead, so he made his steps bigger to catch up to her. "My father, he died when Orb was taken over."
"I'm sorry," he muttered, looking apologetic.
"Why would you be?" She gave a small, light laugh. "It's not as if you were the one who killed him."
Athrun shook his head, not believing that she could find mirth with such a loss. But she was different—so, so different from anyone else he had met before. Cagalli was just really full of surprises and he couldn't resist himself from wanting more of her.
"I suppose you left Orb after the take-over, then," Athrun further deduced. "If you went here, then you should be listed as a refugee in a city record or something, but you're not in any listing. There are almost a thousand refugees here in Plant, but your name isn't accounted for."
"I lived in the forest."
"By yourself? For that long? Don't you have any other family? Your mother, a sibling, or maybe even a cousin?"
He doesn't need to know everything, Cagalli reminded herself again. But she did find it relieving to be telling someone else of what she felt—and knowing Athrun, he wouldn't judge her for anything she told him. Not after what they had been through before.
"My mother died before I even got to know her," she began to say. "My brother…he didn't know where I was."
"Is he in Plant? I can help you find him so that you can be with him here," he offered.
"No!" Cagalli knew that Kira worked in the castle and was a part of Zaft, so it wasn't impossible that Athrun knew him. So she thought of another lie to tell him. It made her a tad bit guilty, but she needed to protect herself. "My brother lives in the Alliance."
Athrun frowned, sad that she didn't have any family to turn to. "Would you like for me to arrange to bring you to the Alliance? I can have people search for him there, too."
Cagalli bit her lower lip; it was getting harder to continue lying to him. "That's unnecessary. He probably thinks I'm dead anyway and must have gone on with his life."
"But if you said that both your parents died, that means he doesn't have any family left either, doesn't it?" Athrun asked, confused at why she would refuse herself of his generous offer to help. But knowing her, it wasn't so surprising that she doesn't want to give herself a chance to be genuinely happy. He saw that she had issues with herself.
"I'm fine," she said and kicked some sand to the side. "I've been fine by myself."
"You don't need to be alone anymore, Cagalli."
She smiled at the mention of her name.
"That's why I have you now, Athrun."
And he found himself smiling back.
He took her wrist in his hand and they continued to walk along the beach. She didn't seem to mind his touch, so he kept his hand there. "But I know almost nothing of you. All I know is that you're Cagalli Yula, seventeen years old—"
"Actually, I'm eighteen now."
"What? But you were seventeen last time, weren't you?"
Cagalli chuckled. "People—even if they lived in forests—have birthdays, too, you know."
"When did you turn eighteen?" he asked, hoping to finally be able to know more of her.
"The day you found me in the forest was the day before my birthday."
Athrun's lips turned into a straight line. "You spent your whole birthday sleeping."
Cagalli gave another laugh. "Better sleeping than dead, I suppose."
Dead. It still sent shivers down his spine whenever he remembered how she had looked on the trade route, how he had felt at the sight of her so broken.
"I never got to thank you for saving me," Cagalli was now blushing. She didn't know what exactly she was feeling, but she wasn't exactly adverse to him being so close to her. On the contrary, she liked it quite so. She was lucky that the sun was setting because the red on her cheeks wasn't obvious. "I mean, for saving me again. Thank you, Athrun, for everything you've done for me."
"The first time we met," he started, cautiously sliding his hand down to hers. "When I tried to introduce myself, you stopped me. You said you didn't want me to matter. Are your feelings any different now?"
"Yes." That, she couldn't lie to him about. It scared her to think that he meant more to her now than she could have ever expected, and it frightened her even more to imagine that he would have to leave her life once he takes over the throne—or she, his life, when she reclaims her throne. It was inevitable for them to drift apart and there was no certainty that they would see each other again after this. But they both wanted to be together, though they couldn't exactly place their feelings.
What mattered to them was that they were with each other. They had other greater responsibilities to think of, but both offered the other certain clarity. It's as if the world didn't exist, as though they didn't have their kingdoms to worry about.
"I'm glad, then." Athrun couldn't keep the grin off his face. He stopped walking and she got dragged back. He stepped closer to her and stared into her eyes. "I'm lucky to have met you."
The prince couldn't help but find her beautiful as she left her lips slightly parted. Her sun-kissed hair looked a deep shade of golden against the dark hues of the setting sky; her eyes, a light to hold on to as the night came in.
He pulled her into a hug and placed his chin over her head, putting the hand that wasn't holding her hand, to her shoulder.
"There's a war coming," he whispered to her, his hand running through her short blonde tresses. "I don't know yet for sure, but the King intends to announce a war against Orb. I don't want anyone to undergo the same horrors we did when we were children, but I cannot disobey Father."
"A war? Against Orb?" Cagalli gasped, horrified. Her kingdom was already in shambles! And the King of Plant wanted to destroy it even more? She looked up to Athrun and he saw that she was crying. "But why? Why would he want that?"
Athrun sighed. He wasn't supposed to tell anyone outside of the Council about the oncoming war, but there he was, telling Cagalli all that he knew. She seemed to be so strongly opposed to it as he was—and he understood. She must have been traumatized with the loss of her family and friends.
"There's a man named Djibiril. He was a staunch supporter of the late King Azrael of the Alliance, the same man who started the war against Plant," Athrun further explained, his heart feeling heavier at the sight of her despairing. "There is intelligence that he's behind the siege of Orb and plans to use the army to engage Plant in a new war."
"But it has been more than seven years since the war ended, hasn't it? Why would he wait so long to get his revenge?"
"We don't know what exactly his intentions are. We can only assume and prepare for when my father's suspicions are correct."
Her tears kept streaming down her face. Cagalli didn't know what to do now. This was something else entirely, something that could forever hinder her plan to reclaim her throne. If this war persisted, no one would be able to tell how long it would last. It will only end when one kingdom is left with absolutely nothing—and given the state of Orb now, it wouldn't be hard for Plant to win.
She'd lose her kingdom, all her people; and she wouldn't have granted her father's wish of bringing Orb back to how it was before.
Cagalli pushed him away ever so gently and stood at a distance. She turned around and took deep breaths to calm herself. It took her a few minutes to recompose herself, and when she did, she faced him again. "Why are you telling me this?"
He stepped closer once more and brought a hand up to cup her cheek. His thumb wiped the tears that were gathering at the end of her eyes again. "Because you'll be here in Plant and this is my kingdom and as the prince I will do anything in my power to protect it."
His face was nearing hers, but she didn't make any motion to turn away from him.
"I will fight in this war, but only to protect the ones I love." From this close, Cagalli could see nothing else but his eyes. She was mesmerized by the emerald color of them and the lashes that framed them perfectly. "I'll protect you."
Athrun placed his lips on top of hers, but before Cagalli could actually relish in the small contact, he had already pulled away and pulled her into an even tighter hug. It was such a chaste kiss—and her first one, at that—but Cagalli was sure that Athrun could feel her heart pounding against his chest.
And as the prince held the princess in his arms, closing his eyes and breathing in her scent, he thought, maybe I do love her.
They both didn't notice how much time that went by with them just holding one another, but Athrun eventually pulled away and Cagalli frowned.
"I should take you back to Februarius now and head on back to Aprilius as well," he told her, trying to look away in embarrassment. It wasn't that he was ashamed of what he did because he most definitely wasn't. "I wouldn't want to wake up the Hawke sisters so late just to let you in."
She nodded and followed him as they walked back to where they had left her boots and his horse. It was a few moments of silence, but Cagalli could tell that it would persist again between the two of them as they rode back.
"Athrun," she called out, reaching for his hand. He turned around with a mild expression of surprise on his face. She smiled and entwined her fingers with his. "I'll protect you, too."
"I've returned!" Kisaka shouted into the empty living room. A few seconds after, a few doors opened and people stepped out, greeting the exhausted ex-general.
"And still no sign of the princess?" Mu sighed, seeing no blonde enter through the door. "It's been a week and a half; Kisaka, you've scoured the whole forest by now. I think this should prove that Princess Cagalli's in Orb."
"If that is so, then why aren't we there now, too?" Murrue quipped in from his side. "She wouldn't have left us and she could not have done such a feat by herself. Just because you claim that you can make the impossible possible, doesn't mean she can, too."
Mu frowned. "Don't drag my line into this!"
"Enough, you two," Kisaka sighed, massaging his temples. "We've covered the entire forest, but there's no sign of her. The small den she used to occupy has no traces of her either. It's like she completely disappeared."
"Or perhaps taken by the forest sprites," Erica offered as a joke, but none of the other adults seemed to appreciate her attempt at making the mood lighter. "I think Mu's right. Orb has been liberated and Colonel Todaka attests to the princess's presence, then there should be no doubt about it."
They all proceeded to the dining room table where they had their nightly meetings discussing progresses of their search and other theories they can think of. Kisaka sat at the head, his body aching from being out the whole day for the past week, personally searching the blonde who was supposed to be his ward.
"There should be no doubt," Kisaka repeated, finishing a glass of water. "And yet we all doubt it. If Orb is truly as free as it should be, then why have there been no carriages from Orb? Or an official statement that the refugees who have settled in Plant can return to Orb?"
"Perhaps Cagalli is fixing things so that when people return, it's not as bad?" Mu said, which earned him the irritated glare of his fiancée.
"She wouldn't have abandoned us. She would turn to us for counsel, she would do other things—not simply disappear!" Kisaka continued to rack his head for ideas. He had already sent Sahib to search in the Alliance. Erica had also sent a hawk to the Waltfelds to ask for their assistance in the search for the princess in Plant. "Did Andrew send a hawk with his progress today?"
Erica got a note from her pocket and brought it out for her to read. "So far, he has searched the cities of Junius, Quintilis, September, and Sextilis. Aisha searched in the cities of October, November, and December. None of them have seen Cagalli and neither have they heard reports of a new blonde teenager in the different towns. Tomorrow, Andrew will search in Aprilius while Aisha will search in Februarius."
Murrue then got out another parchment from her pocket. "Sahib said that they have already finished scouting the whole desert, but there's also no sign of Cagalli there."
"It's just like when I looked for her five years ago." Kisaka slumped forward, the glass of water shaking in his hands. "Except now I'm sure she's alive. She's my responsibility; I promised King Uzumi that I would be the one to watch over her. But I lost her again, and I failed our King."
"You failed no one, Kisaka," Erica said. "If anything, it was my fault as I was the one who let her leave. If I convinced her to not go by herself, then maybe we wouldn't be going through all this trouble right now."
Murrue sighed. They were all tired—Kisaka, most especially—but they had no time to wallow in their guilt. They had so many questions that needed to be answered—and more importantly, a princess to be found. "Both of you have nothing to be sorry for. Unexpected things happen more often than not, but they do happen and we need to move on from there. It's been a long day, so let's just all get some rest and start again tomorrow."
Mu smiled, proud of his fiancée because she always knew what to say. "She's right. Let's all go to bed now, shall we?"
The engaged couple stood from the table and greeted the other two a good night before turning into their shared quarters. Erica and Kisaka were left alone in the dining room and when Erica noticed Kisaka wasn't making a move to leave, she stood from her chair.
"Listen, Kisaka." Erica bit her lip. "I'm really sorry. I'll continue to help search for Cagalli; you know I don't want anything to happen to her. None of us do."
"I know. I don't blame you for letting her go. It was what she wanted at the time." Kisaka also stood and took the lamp that lighted the room. Together, they headed back to the living room. "Now, Murrue is right. The past week has been exhausting. You should go rest now as well; Ryuta must be waiting for you to come back to your room."
"Children grow up too fast, don't they, Kisaka?" Erica smiled, pushing the door to the room she shared with her son, open. With the faint light coming from the lamp, she could see the glowing features of her young son. He was fast asleep, clutching a pillow—but when she'd return, he'd be hugging her side instead. "One minute they're playing, running around and then the next, they're—"
"They're running away," Kisaka finished, sighing again for the nth time that night. "Sleep well, Erica."
"You too, Kisaka."
Kisaka entered his own room, blowing out the candle and turning in for the night. He couldn't stop thinking of where the lost princess could possibly be, but knew that Kira was taking her absence worse.
It was nearing ten o'clock and Kira was barely finished with the new paperwork that had arrived. Athrun had left a note on his desk earlier that said he was going out for the day and that Kira was to finish reviewing the few papers that he wasn't able to finish going through yesterday. When he was done with the small pile, a new batch of applications arrived after noon and Kira took the liberty of reviewing at least half of them. He wasn't able to finish going through his share, but he decided to bring what he had done to Athrun's study anyway.
There was a knight guarding the door to the study, but as everyone in the castle knew that Athrun and Kira were the best of friends, the knight let Kira enter the unoccupied room without any argument.
He dropped the stack of papers onto his neat desk and wrote down his own note for Athrun. He was exhausted, having done nothing but read applications all day. That, and worrying more for his twin sister. He loved her, but he didn't like that she had to be extremely stubborn and had to run off because she thought it would be okay.
Kira wanted to search for her in Plant himself, but Kisaka had told him to keep on working in the castle because it might get somewhat suspicious if he left and then was eventually spotted with a blonde teenager that looked like him. Kira didn't want to just stay and do nothing compared to the others that were scouring the deserts in the hope of finding her there—which he knew was highly improbable, but they were going to take their chances anyway.
The brunet plopped down on the chair that Athrun sat on. It was cushioned and covered with velvet, so it actually felt quite nice. Was this how it felt like to be a prince? If his sister became a queen, would he be able to sit in chairs like this, too?
He hadn't noticed that the window was open and there was a rather strong gush of wind that entered. He had forgotten to place a paperweight over the applications and they were now scattered all over the floor.
"Oh no!" he exclaimed, trying to catch the other papers before they could fall to the ground. He sighed, looking at the mess he made and crouched down to collect them all. He was so tired, so perhaps he could just rearrange them tomorrow—and hopefully not get any of the applications interchanged.
But among the other parchments was an envelope—the one Kira could recognize as the letter he had received from doctors from a hospital. He stared at it, his curiosity overflowing. He respected Athrun's privacy, but he still had the gut feeling that he should open the contents. Even if he read the letter, Athrun wouldn't find out and Kira was sure that it wouldn't affect their friendship in any way.
After replacing the applications on Athrun's desk, he got the envelope and turned it around, seeing the broken wax seal of the Hawke Hospice. Kira's curiosity was eating him alive, so he pulled the letter out and his eyes—adjusted to quickly scanning over all the contents of the different applications—had to slow himself down and reread what was written there.
Cagalli Yula. Approximately seventeen years of age. Unknown birth date. Unknown nationality. Unknown occupation. Blonde. Petite build. Approximately five feet and four inches in height. Forty-five kilograms in weight. Blood-type A. Broken ribs, a concussion, a few stitches, a mild fever.
Kira was staring intently at the paper and rereading every detail on it. He hadn't even noticed that someone else had entered the room until he heard the wooden door slam.
"The guard outside said you would be here." It was Athrun, and he had the biggest smile on his face despite his disheveled look. "How was your day, Kira? Aren't you going to sleep now?"
But he heard none of that and instead his adrenaline made him rush to his best friend, holding him up against the wall with his fingers clutched tightly over his coat. Athrun stared, aghast, at Kira's dangerously purple eyes. He had never seen Kira look so wild before, but he looked as though he was ready to kill.
"Kira, what's gotten into you—?"
"Where is she?!" He pushed the Prince more forcefully against the wall. The crumpled letter from the hospital fell from his hand and Athrun saw it as it fell on the ground. She? Athrun wondered, did he mean Cagalli?
"Where is Cagalli?" Kira's hold on Athrun didn't falter. "Where is my sister?"
End of Chapter Eight
Song of the Chapter: Transatlanticism by Death Cab For Cutie
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