Chapter Twenty
"I appreciate everything you've done for us." Hershel said as they sat on the tailgate of Daryl's truck drinking fresh lemonade Beth had made that morning. Daryl nodded his head as he looked towards the house, waiting to see if Beth peeked out her window or came outside. He wished she would, he wanted one more glimpse of her before he left the farm for good. But nothing. No flutter of her curtains, no slamming of the screen doors, just silence. And still. He set his mason jar to the side and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
"I appreciate you takin' me in, and not sendin' me to jail afterwards." Daryl said and Hershel laughed softly before finishing the last drop in his glass.
"Just try and stay outta trouble, son, okay? There's only so many times I can convince Rick not to go ahead and press charges." Hershel said and reached over, patting Daryl's shoulder, "She'll be okay."
"Huh?"
"Beth. I see you keep lookin' at her window. She'll be okay, Daryl. She's never been good with goodbyes, and it's not easy to see a friend leave." Daryl finished his glass of lemonade and looked back at the screen door to the kitchen. The memory of walking through that door for the first time came flooding back into his brain, seeing her smiling, innocent face as she turned to greet him. He still remembered the taste of the strawberry she handed him as she tried to learn a little bit about him. He remembered stealing kisses from her in there a few times whenever everyone else was in the dining room waiting for them to bring out pitchers of tea, water, or lemonade.
"I'm gonna go double check the guest house, make sure I have everythin'." Daryl muttered and pushed off of the truck, running his hand through his hair, trying to push Beth from his mind. He walked inside and looked around at the living room that merged with the dining room and kitchen. He didn't show up with much, and hadn't acquired much after moving in, but still, the place seemed empty now. Maisy's belongings had been moved to the main house since Daryl knew she'd be happier in a stable home. He scanned the front rooms quickly, then moved down the hallway, peeking into the bathroom. When he made it to the bedroom he stopped and looked at the handle. With a heavy sigh he pushed the door open with his heart slowly sinking into his stomach. The bed was in disarray from where he woke up that morning and he stepped forward, straightening the comforter before something caught his eye. He reached down between the nightstand and bed, picking up one of Beth's earrings off of the floor. He felt a sad smile play across his lips as he remembered one morning, after a long night of making love, she had woken up to find one had fallen out and she couldn't find it. He had helped her strip the bed, shake out the sheets, and empty pillow cases to find the thing but never had. He sat on the edge of the bed, the side sinking and an envelope sliding out from underneath the pillow onto the floor. He set the earring next to the lamp on the bedside table and picked up the envelope. He pulled Beth's picture out of it, the one she had taken just for him in nothing but a pair of cutoffs and his vest. He slid it back in the envelope and tucked it inside his shirt before walking back out to the truck. Hershel helped him make sure that his motorcycle was secured in the back before slamming the tailgate closed.
"I hope to see you around one day, Daryl." Hershel said and held out his hand, Daryl taking it and feeling Hershel squeeze it in a firm shake.
"I may pop in at the clinic to say hi time to time. I ain't gotta clue where me and Merle are goin', but if we're ever around I'll come by."
"You're always welcome to. Be careful out there, Daryl, and be safe." At that moment the screen door to the kitchen creaked open and slammed shut, Maisy bounding across the side yard to the truck and jumping up on Daryl.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm going to miss you too, mutt." he said as he scratched behind her ears, hearing someone clear their throat. He looked up to see Beth standing in front of him, a paper shopping bag in her hands as she tried to avoid his gaze.
"Daryl, you have a safe trip, son. I'll leave you two alone." Hershel gave Beth's shoulder a gentle squeeze before whistling for Maisy and walking inside with her.
"Mama wanted to make sure you had lunch and dinner for tonight." she said and held the bag out for him to take, "I stuck some water bottles down in there, there's fresh bread, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, cookies, and a good portion of cake. I stuck a couple of apples and bananas in there too."
"You'll be okay, Beth." Daryl said after setting the bag in his seat, watching her cross her arms over her stomach. He knew she would be, at least, he hoped she would be. He had to restrain himself from reaching out and touching her elbow, cheek, or pulling her against him. This was for the best.
"I know." she whispered in response to his statement and bit her bottom lip, watching her scuff her foot in the dirt.
"We're from two completely different backgrounds, Beth. I don't think we were meant to be. Girls like you aren't supposed to be with guys like me. Guys like me, we get girls like you hurt an' in trouble. I ain't gonna risk your life or your health."
"Daryl, please, shut up." she said and looked up at him. He saw the redness in her eyes and noticed how puffy they were underneath but she didn't shed a tear then, "The more you try to explain your reasons the more it hurts. If you're gonna leave, leave, but don't drag it out, don't hurt me more than you have to okay?"
"Okay." he murmured and looked down, hearing her sigh softly.
"Daryl?"
"Hm."
"Please be safe, okay? Just...be careful."
Because I couldn't bear the thought of you getting hurt, or worse...
She couldn't say that out loud though, not anymore. A week ago she would have had no issue telling him that but now, now it was different and that kind of confession would be out of line.
"I'll be alright. Stay outta trouble, Greene." he said and reached forward anyways, giving the underside of her chin a little tap with his finger. She managed a smile and a small laugh before they heard an engine coming up the driveway. They both glanced towards the outskirts of the farm to see a large, shiny black truck making it's way towards them.
"I'll be on my way. Looks like Rick and Lori are here. See ya 'round, Greene."
"Bye, Daryl." she murmured softly and took a few steps back from the truck, watching him slid in and buckle his seat belt. His engine roared to life, and with a nod and a small wave, he was pulling out of the driveway and passing the Grimes' truck with a quick honk.
Daryl glanced in his rearview mirror and watched as the farmhouse grew further and further away. He saw Beth, her head hanging with her arms crossed over her chest as she stood where he left her. He heaved a heavy sigh and rolled his window down, rubbing his hand across his mouth a few times before looking in the mirror again. She was walking slowly back to the house, stopped and looked at him one more time before disappearing inside.
"If you're there God, tell me if I'm making a bad decision."
It didn't take him long to get to where Merle had been hanging out for the past three weeks, at one of his friend's garages. He was helping fix cars and motorcycles to rake in enough cash to go drink, pay a lady of the night, and get his fix he so desperately seemed to need. When he pulled up he honked his horn and tossed his cigarette, the third since he left the farm, out the window and came to a stop behind the garage.
"Well well, what's up?" Merle asked as he and his friend, Chase, or Charlie, hell he couldn't remember, came walking out of the garage and up to his truck, "Your bike turned out good, little brother. Maybe we can go for a ride this evenin', huh? Mine's just 'round the other side."
"Yeah, sounds good."
"We can go to the bar if ya want. I heard Carol's gonna buy it from the owner, said he's in poor health and can't keep up with it anymore."
"Cool." Daryl said and pulled out another cigarette, placing it between his lips and lighting it. He felt the burn in his throat and the tension ease in his muscles.
"What's wrong with you, boy?"
"Ain't nuthin' wrong with me, Merle. Help me get this damn bike unloaded. I need a fuckin' drink."
"Alright, pissy pants I'll hel-Hey! Calm down!" Merle shouted as Daryl turned and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, cigarette hanging out of the corner of his mouth as he jerked him forward.
"Watch yer tongue, Merle. I ain't puttin' up with your shit today, alright?"
"Okay, okay, calm down." Merle said and shoved himself away from his brother, "Damn you're helluva lot stronger than you were before you went to work for Doctor Dolittle."
"Keep that in mind then."
Come out w/ us 2nite. U will have fun! Promise.
-Sam
Beth read the message and sighed, sliding her phone back into her pocket and walked towards the guest house, a laundry basket propped on her hip and Maisy following right behind her.
"You can do this." she muttered as she forced herself through the door and into the house. She swallowed hard as she looked around at the living room, glancing down the hallway. She still expected to see Daryl coming out of his bedroom, a grin on his face as he made his way down the hall towards her. Disappointment hit her again and she sniffled, fighting back tears as she walked to the kitchen to collect dish towels. Maisy ran through the house with her nose to the ground, whining as she popped into all of the rooms. Beth walked down the hallway and into the bathroom, Maisy sitting at the door and watching as she picked up all of the bath towels and wash cloths.
"He ain't comin' back, Maisy so stop your whining. Crying ain't gonna fix anything." she said but realized she was mainly fussing at herself. Maisy darted out of the bathroom and down to the bedroom, stopping in front of the door and putting both paws against the light wood of the door frame. Beth placed her hand on the cold knob and closed her eyes.
"You can do this." She shoved the door open and walked into the bedroom. She felt the lump rising in her throat as she choked back tears. It smelled like him still and the comforter on the bed was stretched sloppily across the top like he had always done. She set the basket down and was quick to strip the pillows and toss them into the laundry basket. As she reached for the comforter and sheets a glint in the light caught her eye and she looked over at the night stand and paused. She sat down on the bed and picked up the small diamond earring.
"Oh crap! Daryl, wake up, I can't find my earring."
"Huh? Wha?"
"Up, Daryl, help me strip right quick."
"But you're already naked."
"The bed, Dixon, not me. My earring fell out and I can't find it."
"S'ok Beth, I'll find it for ya."
She tightened her fist around the stud and sniffled, this time feeling a fresh wave of hot tears rolling down her cheek.
"Dammit, Dixon, what did you do to me?" she muttered and wiped quickly at her cheeks. Maisy walked up to her, tail and ears lowered and sat down in front of her. With a low whine she rested her head on Beth's knee and looked up at her with large brown eyes.
"I know, I know, I miss him too." Beth said as she leaned down and hugged the dog's neck, Maisy giving her cheek a loving lick, "I miss him. I miss his stupid face so much." Her phone vibrated in her pocket again and she pulled it out, seeing another text from Sam.
U decide nething yet?
-Sam
Beth looked at the earring then back at her phone. Maisy whined again and she reached down to scratch behind her ear.
Be at ur house in an hour. See u then
-Beth
A/N: Wow I've been on a roll with the updates this weekend! Things have been calming down so I can write more, and plus I've been watching the Dead White and Blue marathon to keep me motivated. I hope everyone is doing well! Reviews are much appreciated, but really thank you so much for reading!