A/N: Thanks for the reviews! :-). I'm fine with Luke and Luke and Andy, but I just like Andy and Sam a lot better. So it'll probably turn into a McSwarek story with a bit of AndyxLuke mixed in. It's hard to summarize what I've got planned for this story, but you'll just have to wait and find out!
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Chapter 2: One Way Or Another
Sam had been off the day that Andy had gotten shot, so he hadn't heard about it. He was clueless when he walked into 15 Division the next day, ready for a day at work.
People had been sort of walking on eggshells around him, and it made him curious. Why were they doing that? He had no idea what was going on, but he was blissfully unaware of what really had happened. People didn't want him to freak out, and for good reason.
He didn't even notice that Callaghan wasn't in today, it just didn't cross his mind.
Suiting up before walking into parade like any other usual day. Of course he noticed that Andy wasn't there amongst her usual friends. And all of her friends looked pretty upset, shaken up to say the least. It peaked his suspicion that something wasn't right. Was Andy sick or something?
Collins even sat there looking as though he wanted to be sick. He sat at his seat with his eyes down at the desk in front of him with the worst look on his face. He might have seen people be shot before around him, being a soldier and all, but Andy was still his partner, she'd been counting on him, and he felt like he failed her. But, Sam didn't know that.
Leaning back in his seat, he looked up as Best walked in and took the podium. Everyone quieted down and looked at Best as he stood there.
"Alright guys. I know we're all still shaken up about yesterday. And I know a lot of you want to be at the hospital today, but we can't be. I want to assure you, Andy is fine. Callaghan and Tommy are with her, she'll make a full recovery, but she'll be out for a few weeks."
Wait, Andy? Sam sat up at the mention of Andy's name and he looked up at best, blinking a little. "What's happened to Andy?" he asked instantly, not even caring that he cut Best off from his talk.
Best glanced at Sam and shook his head. "Nobody told you? McNally was shot yesterday in the line of duty-" he started.
But, Collins finished for him. "We...we were responding to a 911 domestic call. The husband had a gun. Andy...Andy tried talking him down, but he freaked out and shot her. She...she was shot three times. Her vest only took one..." he said in the most guilty tone he could muster.
"WHAT?" Sam asked, instantly to his feet. The chair skidded back and fell onto the floor as he pushed his way over to Collins. Grabbing him by the vest and pulling him up onto his feet. "You were her partner damnit! You were supposed to have her back!" he yelled, rage filling him.
Yeah, he loved Andy. He'd had such a hard time with Jerry's death, and now the idea of Andy dying and her not knowing how he felt just struck him. He couldn't loose Andy, he loved her.
"SWAREK!" Best yelled, looking at him. "Calm down! Andy is fine."
"She is NOT fine!" he shot back. Shoving Collins back, making him stumble back down onto his chair before Sam looked back at Best. "She was shot! And nobody thought to call me? What the hell, Frank?!"
"It wasn't our decision, Sam. It was Tommy McNally's. He told us we were not to call you yesterday, he didn't want you there." Frank answered.
Sam's face sunk as he stared at Frank, shaking his head and looking to one side. "I'm going to the hospital. Now. Bye." he said, starting to storm out of the parade room.
"Luke is with her, Sam." Frank said, causing him to stop in his tracks.
Hearing that, Sam gripped his hands into tight fists. "Luke? Why the hell is Luke with her?"
"He wanted to be there."
"I want to be there. I'm GOING to be there." Sam said before storming out and into the locker room to get his things. He needed to get to the hospital, and he wasn't planning on coming back to the station.
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Andy laid in her hospital bed fast asleep. Luke and Tommy had been there most of the time since she'd been in the hospital, one only leaving for short periods for food, drink or bathrooms. But, somehow Luke had talked Tommy into going home and getting some sleep. Andy was fine, Tommy would be gone for a few hours, and he promised to be there with her.
Luke sat next to her bed leaning back in the chair. He'd gotten sleep...sort of. Sleep in that stiff chair as he watched her sleep. He'd fallen asleep in short periods every now and then, and he was starting to have a crick in his neck.
Reaching up, he rubbed his neck as he shifted to sit up, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and looking up at Andy's face. He loved her, there was no doubt about it. And he hated seeing her in so much pain.
Gently she shifted, starting to wake up. Her eyes opened just halfway as she glanced around, her eyes landing on Luke sitting there. Giving him a small smile before she sighed, looking away a little. "Where...wheres dad?"
"I sent him home to get some sleep. You're fine, and he needed sleep."
"Thanks..." she whispered. Shifting to slowly push herself so she could sit up a little, wincing and gritting her teeth at the slight bit of pain.
"Heyy, hey just stop moving." Luke said, sitting up and moving to take her hand softly.
But she shook her head. "If I don't shift my whole body will hate me, Luke. I'm fine." she said. Finding a comfortable position before she sighed, glancing over at him. "You should go too. Go get some sleep. You've got those circles under your eyes when you don't sleep..."
Yeah, she still remembered what he looked like when he didn't sleep well. When a certain case was bothering him. When he was bringing his work as a homicide detective home with him. Of course, some of those images were hard to just wipe out of your mind, she'd seen them, and she still sometimes had nightmares about some of the things she'd seen on the job. It was awful, the things they would see on the job. But it was part of the job, part of protecting people.
"I'm fine, as long as I'm here with you." he answered. Holding onto her hand, he rubbed her fingers with his before intertwining his fingers with hers, looking up into her eyes.
She sighed a little, looking at their fingers and then back to him. "Luke.."
"Please Andy, don't push me away. I love you, you scared the living hell out of me. Just...thinking I'd never see you again. I miss you.."
"Luke.."
"No. No, let me talk." he said, effectively shutting her up. "I'm going to be here for you. I miss you, and I still want to marry you, I've always wanted that, since I met you. The thing with Jo...well, that was a mistake. The worst mistake I'd ever made. I'd do anything in the world to take that back. When you got with Swarek...I told myself, as long as you were happy, I was happy. But thats not true. I want to be the one that makes you happy. I want to be the one that makes you smile and laugh.." he said, looking up at her face. "Please...let me. Give me another shot."
Slowly she bit her bottom lip as she listened to him. He would be the safe choice, that was for sure. She didn't have to give Luke all of herself, not as much as she'd given to Sam. He wouldn't be able to crush her in the same ways Sam had when he walked away. Even Luke cheating on her hadn't hurt nearly as much as the image of Sam walking away from her in the parking lot of the Black Penny that night. Seeing him get into his truck and drive away. It'd been the most traumatic experience of her life.
Thinking about it, she sighed a little and nodded. "Okay."
"Okay?" he asked, gripping her hand a little.
Looking up at him, she nodded a little. "Okay. I'll give you another shot. Yeah Jo was a mistake, but...but it doesn't bother me anymore."
"Really? It doesn't? You'll give me another chance?" he asked happily, a smile spreading across his lips.
She only nodded, gripping his hand a little back for the first time since he'd taken it.
"Yeah."
Standing up, he moved up to her to gently kiss her, resting his other hand on the side of her neck. And she leaned her head up to gently kiss him back, just softly. It didn't feel the same with Luke as it did with Sam. There were no fireworks, no sparks that set her skin on fire. It was just a kiss.
Gently she leaned back, laying back on the bed and giving him a small smile. She could pretend, pretend that spark existed.
And he smiled back at her. Shifting to sit on the edge of the bed instead of in the chair, moving one arm around her shoulders and rubbing her arm lightly. She shifted herself so he could lay on his side a little next to her. It did feel good to feel someone close to her that loved her so much.
Sighing, she settled down next to him, laying her head on his shoulder and closing her eyes. "Just...just don't hurt me again, Luke. I'm...I'm still somewhere between getting over Sam and what he did..."
"I'd never hurt you again. I made that mistake once, and it cost me my entire life."
She nodded, taking in a deep breath of his scent that was so different from Sam's. For the moment, she was content being held with him. And that would do, for now. She was content with knowing the man that held her didn't hold everything, that he couldn't shatter what was left of her heart.
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Sam raced to change back into his civilian clothes, grabbing his keys and getting in his truck, driving to the hospital like a mad man. He needed to see her, to see she was alive and safe. He was suddenly terrified about having to bury the woman he loved.
He loved her. He could admit that to himself suddenly. He'd been scared of his feelings before, wanting to run from them. Everything became oh so real oh so fast. And then he'd lost Jerry, his best friend, and his feelings for Andy scared him even more. He'd never been one to need someone else to feel okay, but he'd been slowly realizing he needed Andy. It still scared him though, which was why he pushed her away. Maybe if he pushed her away she'd be safe, safe from him.
But, what was he kidding? He was hurting both of them. And now Andy had been shot, she could have died yesterday without ever knowing how he felt about her. Those months he'd spent with her had been the best months of his life. He'd actually started considering his future, a future with her. Never had he thought he'd be that kind of man, a family man. But he would be okay being a family with Andy, having kids with her eyes and his dimples. Only rarely did he let that thought cross his mind, he usually kept it at bay as much as possible.
Driving to the hospital, he found a parking spot as soon as he could. Getting out of his truck and running up to the hospital doors, coming to a stop only when he'd reached the nurses station, taking in a few deep breaths.
"A-Andrea McNally. I'm looking for Officer Andrea McNally." he said once he caught his breath. He still remembered her telling him that she'd been named after her mothers friend, that Andy wasn't her full name but a nickname.
The nurse nodded and pointed him in the direction of her room.
Thanking her before he walked away from the station, walking as fast as he could without running. Going up to Andy's floor and walking down the hall to her room, he stopped at the doorway with the sight he was met with.
Andy laid in bed with Luke laying on his side next to him. She was smiling a little and laughing. But, the smile didn't reach her eyes.
Gripping his hands into tight fists at the sight of Luke next to his girlfriend. Well...she wasn't really his girlfriend anymore, he did break up with her.
Stepping forward into the room slowly, Sam took in a deep breath. "McNally..." he said.
His voice caused her to look up, her eyes meeting with his. Her eyes widened a bit before she looked down. "Sam.." she said, sighing a bit.
Luke glanced over at Sam and shifted to sit up. "What are you doing here, Swarek? Shouldn't you be at work?"
"Luke stop." Andy said, reaching to grab his wrist, looking up at him. "Hey, can you go get me something to eat? Please? And some coffee, god I need coffee." she asked.
He glanced back at her and nodded. "Alright." he said. But he suddenly felt the need to stake his claim on her in front of Swarek. Leaning down, he kissed her slowly, brushing his nose against hers. "I'll be right back." he said before he stood up. Walking out of the room, his shoulder hit Sam's to try and make him stumble. But, he didn't stumble, he just glared at Luke.
What was that? Sam gripped his hands tighter into fists before he stepped into the room. Pushing the door closed behind him and looking over at Andy. "Whats going on here, Andy?"
"What do you mean? You left me, remember Sam? Why should you care." she said, looking down at her lap.
"Yeah, and I made a mistake..." he said, taking a step towards her bed and looking at her. Reaching to take her hand as he sat down in the seat Luke had been using before. Gripping her fingers a little and looking up at her face. "I'm sorry, Andy. It was a mistake, I made a mistake. The worst mistake of my life. I...I was stupid, I shouldn't have walked away like that."
"No you shouldn't." she said, cutting him off. Shooting him a look before she sighed, shaking her head. "Please Sam, just go. You've done enough to me already."
"And Luke hasn't? Andy, he cheated on you. I've never done that, I'd never think of doing that."
"He also didn't walk away! He tried to fix what he'd broken. You walked away. Do you have any idea how much that hurt? After you promised me you wouldn't do that. You broke your promise!" she said, slowly starting to tug her hand back.
But he held onto her fingers tightly, just not too tightly. "I'll never do it again."
"How can I know that? How can I know thats not another empty promise?"
"Because I love you." he said. It'd been the first time he said it out loud. He remembered Andy telling him one day, and he'd been so afraid of that word, those feelings, that he couldn't say it back.
The sound of the words stunned her as she just looked at his face. She'd heard him say it to her in her dreams dozens of times, but never out loud. Shaking her head and looking away. "This is a cruel joke, Sam.."
"It's not a joke. I'd never joke about loving you. Please give me a chance, just give me a chance."
"Do you have any idea what you've put me through? No, no Sam, its too late. You're too late. I...I'm giving Luke another chance." she said, looking away a little. She felt her heart drop at the sound of her own words, they almost caught in her throat as a lump formed there. She loved Sam with all her heart, and now he was there telling her how much he loved her.
But Sam, Sam was shellshocked. She was giving Luke another chance? Shaking his head and moving to stand up, looking at her. "No! No. Andy, please. I thought I was doing the right thing! Giving us both space. Time to work things out."
"Yeah well, it wasn't the right thing." she said. Yanking her hand back and glancing over at him. Fresh tears rimmed her eyes as she tried her hardest not to let them fall. "You broke my heart, Sam. And I just...I can't let you do that again. I can't."
"Is that why you're giving Luke a shot? Because he can't break your heart? Because he doesn't hold enough of it to break it?"
"That is none of your business. Luke and me are none of your business."
"Oh it is totally my business!" he said, looking down at her. Slowly moving to cup her face, rubbing his thumbs over her cheeks. "Please...Andy. Give me a shot. You don't have to do anything, I'll do it all. I'll make you dinner. Every single night. I'll take out your garbage. I'll do everything every day until you say yes, until you're mine again. Hell, I'll walk your dog."
"Sam...I don't have a dog." she said with a sigh.
"Then lets get a dog! Come on, we can get a dog. Any kind of dog, I don't care. And we'll name him Boo Radley. I've always loved that name for a dog." he said, giving her a smile.
She couldn't help but chuckle and shake her head. "Boo Radley..." she muttered, looking away. "Sam, no..."
He was losing, even he could tell, and it tore him apart inside. He was putting himself out there. He'd never told a woman that he loved them before. He'd never felt love for a woman like he did with Andy McNally.
"I need you, Andy...I've...never needed anyone before in my life until you. It...it scared me, okay? How much I needed you, how much I still need you. Everything in me needs you. I need to hold you, to be close to you, know you're safe in my arms. I'll do anything, anything in the world that you want and its yours."
"I want..." she started to say, looking down at his hand that still held hers. "I want you to leave me alone."
"I can't do that...please Andy. Just give me a shot. One more shot is all I'm asking. I know you feel more for me than you do Callaghan. You know it too, it just scares you. It scares me too..."
Andy shook her head, looking up at him and pulling her hand away. "No! Sam do you have any idea what you did to me? What you did changed me fundamentally, changed who I am. I can't go through that again, I can't risk letting you do that to me."
He sighed, slowly moving to sit in the chair and leaning against the bed, looking down. "I was...I was so scared today..." he started to say.
Blinking a bit, Andy looked at him curiously, tilting her head to one side. "Scared? What for?"
"I was scared I'd never see you again..." he admitted, glancing up at her. "Scared you were worse than they told me and you were going to just be gone. I can't loose you."
"You...you didn't have me." she reminded him, leaning back against the bed and sighing.
"I know! And its killing me."
"Then why weren't you here yesterday?" she asked, turning her head to one side and looking at the opposite wall of the room.
He blinked at that and shook his head. "I didn't know yesterday. I found out in parade this morning. Nobody wanted to tell me anything. If I'd have known yesterday I would have been right here for everything, I swear."
Sighing a little, she shook her head. Slowly turning her face to look at him and biting her bottom lip. "I'm sorry Sam. I just can't. I can't give that much of me to anyone anymore. Not even you. I can't loose everything, not again." she said.
"You won't loose everything." he said. Leaning forward and moving to take her hand in his again, stroking the back of it slowly and leaning down to kiss her knuckles. "I'll give you everything and anything you could ever want. I...I want to be with you." he said.
Though he smiled a little, realizing something. Slowly looking up at her. "You didn't deny it."
"Deny what?" she asked, eyeing him curiously.
"That you feel more for me than you do Callaghan. You do, don't you?"
She clamped her lips shut tight and turned her head away, not able to look at him. Yeah she could lie under cover, but she could never lie to those dark brown eyes of his. "N-No! Of course not. I care about him more." she muttered.
"You're lying."
But she shook her head. "I am not." she stated, still refusing to look at him.
"Then look at me. Look me in the eye and tell me that you love Callaghan more than me, that you truly want to be with him, that he makes you happier than I do. And I'll go. I'll go and leave you to be happy." he stated.
But, she just couldn't. Biting her bottom lip and clearing her throat. "This is stupid..."
"See! You're lying!" he said, smiling quickly, showing off his dimples.
She yanked her hand from him and turned her face to look at him. "Stop! I said no. I'm not going to say yes. Go away. Go away and don't come back here."
"Oh, I'm not going anywhere."
"You've hurt me enough Sam. I can't let you hurt me like that anymore, okay? Please. I don't feel the same way about you anymore. You're too late." she said, looking down and sighing slowly. "Just go..." she said in a light voice.
"Andy..." he said in a pleading tone, looking down at her hand and then up to her head, not able to see her eyes. Reaching slowly, he rested his thumb under her chin and brought her face up to look at him. And the tears he saw in her eyes made his jaw tighten. It was all because of him, he knew it.
Slowly, a small tear started to slip down her cheeks, unable to hold it back anymore. "I can't...Sam..." she whispered.
He leaned down to gently kiss away the tear as it slid, brushing his nose against hers and closing his eyes halfway. "Walking away from you was the worst mistake I'd ever made in my life. I can't make that mistake again, Andy. I won't. Tell me what it is I can do to make this right?"
She took in a breath, feeling his lips against her skin and his nose against hers, making her close her eyes just halfway, but she shook her head. "Nothing. You can't do anything." she said.
"But.." he started to say.
But, another voice came from the door. "You heard her. Leave, Swarek. I'm taking care of her now." Luke said from the doorway as he walked in holding a small bag of food and a cup of coffee. Walking over to the bed, he shifted his shoulder to nudge Sam away from her. Looking down at Andy and smiling to her, offering her the cup of coffee. "Here, just like you like it. Don't tell the nurse though, I'm sure they wouldn't like you drinking coffee." he said.
Gently Andy took the cup from Luke's hands, sighing happily as she leaned to take a sip of the liquid, closing her eyes happily. "Thank you Luke." she said. Taking in a breath and opening her eyes again, glancing towards Sam. "You should go."
Sam was fuming, and Andy could see that. He glared at Luke and gripped his hands into tight fists. "Hey, Detective, why don't you watch where you're going? Shoving people isn't nice."
"I didn't shove you." Luke retorted, not even looking at Sam as he brought the hospital tray that slid close to the bed so Andy could eat. Sliding it into place and resting the bag down on it, looking at her. "I got you a breakfast sandwich. Its still early, I hope thats okay, you didn't say what you wanted."
She just nodded slowly. "Thats fine." she said as she glanced towards Sam.
"This isn't over, Andy." he stated, glaring towards Luke. "Don't act so smug. She might have said yes to you, but let me set one thing straight. She said yes to you because you can't hurt her. Why can't you hurt her? Because she doesn't love you. She'll never love you the way she loves me."
"Sam!" Andy said, a blush spreading across her cheeks as she looked at them. "Enough!"
Luke gripped his hands into fists, looking over at Sam and shaking his head. "If she loved you oh so much, she'd be with you, don't you think?"
"That'll just take some convincing. She's running away here." Sam said, looking towards Andy. "Running away from what we have."
"What we had, Sam. Had, not have." she corrected.
But Sam shook his head. "No...what we have. I'm not going to give up on you, McNally. I'll never give up on you."
"Just go! Can we stop stressing the person who just got shot out? Please?" she asked, laying back and sighing as she looked off to one side. She didn't want to think about this now, she really didn't.
"Fine. I will be back though. You can bet on that." Sam said as he started to walk out of the room. But, everything within him screamed for him to stay with her, refuse to let her go. Doing that, he thought, would only stress her out even more, and she didn't need extra stress. He would win her back, one way or another.
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A/N: Hey there! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! :-). Let me know in the reviews. I am so happy this has gotten almost 30 follows already with just being up for like a day or so. It's great. I'll keep updating as best as I can, I promise!