With you on my shoulder
By HeartofSummer
Genre: Brittany and Santana romance
Copyright: If I owned them, a lot of the shows awesome characters would be forgotten, since I'd only be writing about these two. So this is purely for entertainment purposes.

A/N: It's time... and I went all out. OMG.
Sorry about the long wait. Just read. I really hope it was worth it, because I needed this to be... perfect.

Chapter 9: Ballad

(Santana)

It was the foot in my shin that woke me up.
The pain wasn't much, but it made me open my eyes only to flinch and close them again at the sunlight shining in through the window. It took me a few seconds to remember where I was and why I felt something on top of me that usually wasn't supposed to be there. I caught the smell of Brittany's hair in the morning breeze drifting in through the open window. It tickled my nose and the scent of her skin, lotus flowers, made me slowly reopen my eyes.

She was sleeping half on top of me, one of her legs draped across mine, arms around my middle. I flushed as I realized I had one kind of around her too, and the hand on my other arm on top of her hand on my right breast. My nipples started to hardened to make things worse, and the urge to get out of this awkward situation became more and more pressing. But I managed to calm myself down by swearing loudly in Spanish in my head, taking small breaths not to take in too much of her. It was seriously driving me crazy. I felt her warmth and scent in a whole other way now. The other mornings it had been different, though not less awkward on my part. Turns out Brittany needs a train to crash through her room for her to wake up. At least when she's sleeping with me in her bed.

When we'd been small she would always awake by herself when she was ready, which used to be about half past six. She used to wake me up by jumping on her side of the bed, and when I told her to go watch TV and let me sleep, she would throw herself on top of me, shouting that it was my favourite programme and that I wouldn't want to miss it. And every single time I got out of bed.

I knew it wasn't my favourite show on, it was hers, but I loved the look of pure glee on her face when she watched it, laughing at the colourful figures, going on and on about what weird planet would leave their babies all alone in a house with a couple of bunnies and some strange vacuum cleaner. She expected me to have the answers. So I always made up some strange reason why the parents needed to go shopping, or work, or was on a trip to the Pancake Planet to buy stuff for their children.

I could only see the top of her blonde head from where she was laying on top on me, but it made me smile. Our breathing was in synch, and I moved my hand to run my fingers lightly through a few strands of her hair. Then the door opened and I closed my eyes, trying to look like I was sleeping.

"Go wake the ladies up, will you?" I heard Brittany's dad say with his deep voice, as filled with humour as ever. I heard the scratching against the floorboards and tensed when I realised a second too late just what kind of thing was heading towards us. Bailey landed on top of my legs, stumbling and grumbling awkwardly. I opened my eyes and stared the thing down, daring it to come closer.

Bailey just put her head to the side, showing off her teeth like she was daring me right back, but with a goofy grin.
Then she pawed closer, leaning in to lick Brittany in the face. I shivered, inching away as the thing turned it's smelling, huge mouth towards me.
"Yuck! Get out of this bed or I swear I will cut you!" Bailey just wagged her tail and went back to licking Brittany who giggled, pushing one of her hands onto the dog's face, saying:
"Down girl, down." Bailey did as she said, but as soon as she left Brittany realized how she had been sleeping, sitting up, one leg pressing in between my thighs. She smiled a little guiltily at me, and I suddenly wished Bailey had stayed, making this thing far less embarrassing.

"Sorry, San. I hope it didn't get too hot with me clinging to you." She said it so easily I felt a sting in my chest, thinking she must not be as nervous about our closeness as I was.
"It's fine, Britt. I've always known you were a hugger." She smiled, straddling me like she always used to when we were little, giving me those same hummingbirds too. Well, back then they'd been butterflies. Now they had definatly stepped up in size.

Then she put one hand on either side of my head, and I think I spaced out. I wasn't myself. It was early morning, I was turned on by my best friend (and it wasn't just morning wetness, so to speak, this was fully fledged, wanting-to-wrap-my-legs-around-her-waist kind if turned on), her parents were in the house, she was my best friend, the frigging dog was watching, we had cheerleading practice, and oh, did I mention, it was my best friend Brittany that was straddling me?

"You are so cosy to sleep next to." Then she laughed, hopping off the bed and left the room. I stayed on the mattress, feeling as if an elephant had made a point of using my chest as a nice resting spot. Thousands of thoughts should have been running through my head, but really, the only one that did was a quickly put together day dream about Brittany spreading my legs and... Bailey jumped up into the bed again, sitting down and watched me with her tongue hanging on the side.
"What are you staring at?" I barked at her, getting up and away from the monster, hurrying up to get my things so that I could make myself decent enough for school. It felt like an impossible task, but I was from Lima Heights, I was used to living on the edge.
Casting one last, warning look to the dog still on the bed, I went towards the bathroom where I heard water flowing. I could hear voices down the hall, Bailey following me and the smell of pancakes filled the air. Apart from the heart attack, this wasn't a bad way to start a day.
.

.
"Ballad..." The word immediately gets my attention away from discussing Rachel's clothes with Brittany. Mr. Schuester writes it on the board, walking over to us across the room. "From Middle English 'Balade'. Who knows what this word means?" Rachel's hand immediately shoots up, and I flinch in my seat.

"It's a male duck." Brittany states before Mr. Schue gives anyone else a chance. My head snaps in her direction, feeling the smile creep onto my lips. All the other members have learned to ignore Brittany's sudden outburst of wisdom. I shake my head at her, and she looks at me, nodding in that cute way that she always does when she's sure about something.
Kurt, with the help of Mr. Schue continues in explaining what at ballad is and I take a look in Quinn's direction, humoring myself with what ballad they would potentially sing. I catch a glimpse of Quinn staring over at Puck – or Rachel, but I doubt she has the same problems as I do with girls - from where she's got her head leaning on her boyfriend's shoulder. Finn looks like he's trying really hard to understand the idea of a ballad, and it looks like it's hurting his head.

"Stories and music are the way we express feelings that we can't get out any other way!" I pretend to not be listening that closely, when in fact my heart is racing in my chest, and I sneak a peek in Brittany's direction. I wondered what I would have sung to her. About our friendship, about how confusing everything's been lately but that in the end, she's somehow... the feeling that makes me feel at home.
I tune back in at Rachel's annoying voice, trying not to laugh at the face Puck is doing when he pretends to care about Rachel's thoughts... wait, maybe he does care? She is Jewish after all, and he's got this scary passion for other Jews. Like their all sacred or something.

"So here's our assignment for the week. I'm going to pair you off, and I want you to pick a ballad to sing to your partner." Mr. Schuester tells us and I search the room wondering who I should demand to be with. I know Brittany will want to sing with Mike, so I should pick someone else... I should pick Puck, because he's my man and all, but... God, the only one I could picture singing a ballad to is Brittany. Mainly because she wouldn't laugh her way through it. Well, as long as it wasn't Preggo or Rachel I would be good.
"I pick Quinn." Finn's words sets our choir leader off somehow.
"Ah, no, no, no, no! Too easy," he scolds. Brittany looks at me, raising her eyebrows and I try not to burst out laughing at his gestures. "You're partners will be chosen by fate!" Everybody ooh's and when Brittany looks down into her lap, biting her lip, I cross my arms over my chest, smiling.
"I put your names in this hat. Whomever you choose is your partner!"

"I bet the ducks in the hat." Brittany whispers to me, but I only half listen, eyes on that hat. It could bring me a week of fortune, or a week of hell. I hated teachers who wanted to be fair. It sucked being paired up with some Lima Loser who only checked out your jugs when you tried to get a good grade out of the really boring assignment. I should pick... oh, right.

"But Matt's out sick today. He had to go to the hospital 'cuss they found a spider in his ear." I announce this, trying not to laugh. Matt had an irrational fear of spiders and I loved teasing him about it. I guess it was with spiders like with all other animals. They could sense if you didn't like them, and that attracted them to you. It was like me and all the geeks in the school that feared me. It just made me pick on them all the more.
Everyone looks disgusted, and Mr. Schuester just simply puts his name in the hat instead. God, I hope I didn't have to do it with him. That'd be honestly weird, even if he was kind of good looking.
"Who's up first?"
I do the drum roll together with everyone in the club, feeling kind of good about it anyway. Fate should help me out, and Puck was the first one to pick. I kind of hoped he would get to sing with Mr. Schuester. That would have totally cracked me up.
"Mercedes." That would be interesting. Next up is...
"Quinn!" Artie sound like he's just fell out of his wheelchair and landed face down in-between her boobs. I laugh at that, he sounds so hopeful. I'll love to hear their song.

Finn looks like he's gonna cry when he reads the name.
"Kurt." I laugh out loud, not being able to keep it in. That is priceless! I meet Quinn's gaze and she's laughing too, along with everyone else. Brittany leans into me, whispering:
"They're gonna be so cute!" I put my hand over my mouth, laughing, and it only grows harder to stop when Tina reads her note saying:
"Other Asian." Good, then Brittany won't be with Mike and I won't have to fight the strange feeling of jealousy that flares up as soon as I see them together. I jump up to go after Tina, still giddy about it all, grateful that neither Preggo, cripples or Puck was left. Hopefully I wouldn't be paired off with miss Man Hands. I'm wearing my bracelet today, to make her feel happy since poor Mittens is still missing. It's been a week, and I know that he won't be back. He probably got a heart attack from all the cupcakes Brittany fed him. Poor thing, I kind of liked him.
I open my note, making a sound between a laugh and a hmm, looking at my best friend.

"Brittany!" She gasps in joy, jumps up and claps her hands as the others laugh at our fortune. This really was fate. I smile at Mr Schue knowingly, before walking back to my seat, getting a high five from Brittany. She crosses her leg, letting me get by and I move my chair closer to hers before sitting down next to her, enjoying the super awkward moment when Mr. Schue realizes he has been paired up with Rachel.
I actually like this song, I realize as they sing it. It's a beautiful duet – a little too cheesy for my taste – but I wouldn't mind having it on my ipod. I smile as I see Mr. Schue trying to escape from Scary Berry, who looks like she's just gotten a major Hot for Teacher's problem. I look over at Brittany, trying not to laugh, and she has put her head sideways, just looking at them with a smile on her lips. I wonder what she's thinking. I lean back, feeling the giggles rock through my body as he absent-mindedly grabs a chair, building some kind of protective shield before him. Brittany starts laughing too, beside me, and Tina, Artie, Britt and Mercedes, smart as they are, bring out their cellphones, holding them up like lighters to set the mood. I can't hold it anymore, laughing out loud and grabbing the side of the chair not to fall off.

"'cuss no one can deny
this love I have inside
I'll give it all to you
my love, my love, my love..."

Okay, Mr. Schuester's faces is priceless... and as the music tunes out, Brittany can hardly hold her laughter, ready to clap, and I join in.
"Okay, something like that." He practically makes a run for it, and I laugh, leaning into Brittany.
"Wow."
"I wish I had this on my ipod." she whispers, giggling.
"Are you kidding me, I wish I'd filmed it!"
.

.
I'm sending my fifth message to Quinn, rolling my eyes at my attempts to sound worried.
Well, I am kind of worried. Fine if Quinn and I are not as close as we once were, sharing candies and boys and homework and all that jazz, but she's still my friend, or at least frenemy.
I get to be the ruling bitch when she's away, but I still worry. She is preggo and all, so if she got hurt so would the innocent little thing in her tummy be, and that worried me even though it was probably still the size of a blueberry or something. When I'd told Brittany that she'd started referring to the stomach as "Blueberry", which made Quinn annoyed and confused, and made me laugh out loud.
Finn told everyone she was home sick, but what kind of sick he didn't say. Besides it was good to worry about something but how close Brittany was sitting, or how every time I took her pinky in mine she would give me a look that reminded me of Bailey. Or what song I was gonna sing to her.
I threw my phone in front of me on the bed, opening up google on my laptop.
I did listen to a few ballads, but I needed to do some more research before I could find one that fit Brittany. I could probably just sing her one, not needing it to have some special meaning, but I really wanted her to understand that love was something different than what we were doing with the boys in school. And the only way to tell her was through a song, a ballad about the feelings of true love.
"Good Love Ballads" I wrote, pressing enter. As I looked through forums and lists I opened a new window on youtube, checking out the ones I hadn't heard. After half an hour I had a list of the ones I could do. Some were a little cheesy, but proved my point pretty damn well.

- "More than words" by Extreme
- "To be with you" Mr. Big
- "Soulmate" Natasha Bedingfield
- "Finally" Fergie
- "To make you feel my love" by Adele
- "Beautiful Disaster" by Kelly Clarkson

I'd pretty much decided on "Soulmate" when I copied another song, one by Anastacia, that I finally felt like I'd found the one. The music started sipping out, reminding me of how much I'd used to like her. I needed to get me some more of her on my ipod, I decided, when the words came and I got truly hooked.

Tripped along many stones
Enough to say
I found my own way
I don't know, where to go
Couldn't see, where it leads

Making castles in the sand
Afraid no one else would hold my hand
I'm stained from the world
Sad, sad, sad little girl

I wondered a little bit about the lyrics. It reminded me of Brittany enough to speak to her, but to be honest I felt like I was the one that could relate to it.

But I see in your eyes
You wear no disguise
Help me find my way
I'm like a bird in the sky
You helped me to fly
Fly away
Fly away
Back home... back home

I smiled to myself, knowing it sounded a little cheesy, but with that voice she could pull it off. I knew I could pull that off. It was time someone out shined Rachel – Manhands wouldn't know what hit her.
I realized I was crying, and immediately shut the computer screen down, furious with myself. But that song, I'd already decided. I was going to sing it. To Brittany.
.

.
"That's really pretty San!"
It had been weeks since that awkward, kind of hot kiss in Brittany's room but obviously, when she said that to me my heart flipped over like a pancake in my chest and a few lines of the ballad I was supposed to have sung to her slipped into my head. I tried to blink it away, feeling both annoyed and grateful at the fact that we all decided to sing one for Finn and Quinn. That was yet another reason to loath them as a couple – their names made them sound like twins or something.

And speaking of twins, mine were really liking the new bra. Truth be told I'd put it on, heck even bought it, hoping she would comment on it.
I was horny, which wasn't unusual for me, but since me and Puck had been at it like rabid rabbits three times last night it was a little strange. If I hadn't known better, I would've claimed I was sexually frustrated.
Maybe I was going a little loco, but ever since I'd kissed Britt I'd started noticing all kinds of things I'd been ignoring up until now. Like how hot cheerleaders were. And I'd been starting to seriously think about experimenting without a crowd.
It was only for research, of course. I wasn't into to girls like that... I'm sure.
I smiled my shy smile, the one I seemed to save up and use only for her.

"Thanks Brittany."
"I really like the colour, it suits your skin..." She kept on going. I felt myself grow conscious of my body and my room started to feel clammy.
A wave of emotions told me to push her down on the bed this instant but I took a deep, terrified breath and demanded the thought to leave my head. Though, judging from Brittany's coy smile she'd guessed that I was thinking something along those lines.
This was one of those things about Brittany that drove me over the edge. She could be all sweet and cosy and innocent only to turn on her sassyness and flirting the next.
The worst part about that was that I knew I'd been the one who taught and encouraged her to use that.
"Anyway... I'm glad we decided to do a real sleepover here instead of a party", she said, fiddling with the clothes laying on my bed. "We'd only been forced to kiss again."

My eyes snapped back up to hers which were studying me, searching for a reaction with an amused expression. I didn't know how it was even possible, but I felt like I was her lab rat and she was a scientist who was curiously wondering about how my mind and body worked and responded to her tone of voice and what she said.
It was a tough one really, because what she said indicated that she was relieved that we weren't forced to kiss, but her voice – low, sweet and slightly teasing – indicated that she was happy we weren't forced to make out in front of a bunch of horny football players and stuck-up cheerleaders.

"Yeah," was my breathy response, looking away from her, trying to remind myself of some shirt to look for in my wardrobe.
"Now we can do whatever we want", Brittany chirped and I froze, looking over my shoulder suspiciously.
She stood up, winking at me and threw her shirt over her head, revealing a lavender blue bra and for once, matching panties. Her smile was so innocent I wanted to pry it off of her lips.

"Let's run through the sprinklers!" She giggled, waiting expectantly for my response.
"Wha-" I was still in schock, very unlike me.
"Oh please, please, please San!" She begged me, stepping closer, jumping up and down with hands pressed together and a pleading look in her eyes. "Pleeeaaaassseeeee!"
"Uhm, sure Britt. Let's get our sprinklers on."

She gave up a high pitched "YEII!", clapped her hands together and ran out of the door.
"Whoa- wait up!" I hurried after her, and when I got to the living room I stopped, catching my breath – not because I got tired, but because of what I saw when I looked through the glass walls.
She was barefoot and half naked on the lawn, running around and making handstands through the water. It was like being trapped in a bad romantic comedy or a cheesy scary movie. I wasn't sure what would happen next. Either I would go out to do her on the lawn or I would cut out her fake boob with a knife. Since I'm not a dude and Brittany doesn't have fake boobs I just stepped out of my clothes slowly, trying to figure out what a friend would do. Probably run through the sprinklers with her. I calmed myself down and leaned my forehead against the glass, just watching. She was soaking wet already, screaming delightedly like a small child in the lamps that lit up the drops from the sprinklers. Ugh, I'd turned into the dude from that romantic comedy.
Thank god it was still warm outside. She spun around toward me, her hair having come undone, waving at me to come out and join her already.
So I did.
.

.
A half an hour (or so) later we went back inside, laughing together at each others appearances. Our hairs all tousled, mascara running and our bodies and underwear slick with water.
Leaving wet footsteps on the floors I picked a few towels out of the linen closet and went to my room to dry Brittany and myself off. She was holding her arms tightly across her chest, shivering.
I smiled secretly, let the towels fall to the floor, all but one – that I draped around Britt's shoulders.

"We're both gonna get so sick for this," I teased in a pretend tired voice. Brittany didn't answer me, which was a little odd, and then suddenly she snaked her arms around me, squeezing. I didn't say anything, I think she must have been hugging me too tightly, but after a few seconds of doubt I hugged her back and sighed into her neck as she leaned her head slightly on the top of mine.
I could feel her chest heaving against me, making shivers that had nothing to do with the cold water to go down my spine.
It was the feeling of a tightly pulled rubber band in my chest – something was going to happen.

"We're best friends, right Santana?" I felt my heart swell at that and bit back the grin that wanted to storm across my face. Gently leaning back and taking in a shaky breath, I said:

"Sure, Brit." Then I saw her eyes bore into mine, framed by darkened patched of mascara and forgot to think and just leaned into smell and taste her.
I realized my mistake about two inches from her lips, staring at them like I didn't know what to do. Then she leaned in the last bit, kissing me and giving up a satisfied "hummm". Her hands cradled my neck, and I opened my mouth more quickly than I thought was possible, and she answered immediately. I felt my heart running out of the room, along with my consciousness and her trembling fingers left traces of her warmth on my arms.
It was like neither of us were sure of how much we should explore the other, like we were both waiting for something to interrupt us and stop us from crossing that line of friends practising to friends... well, crossing the line. But we were alone in the house. I didn't have any pets. The TV was switched off. The only thing that could have possibly happened was if one of our phones rang, or maybe the fire alarm went off – which in that moment wouldn't have surprised me at all.

But soon our slow touching turned needy, a needy and raging embrace, like we were trying to do as much as possible before something did interrupt us. Her warmth took over, I almost tore off the towel from her shoulders and folded my arms around her waist as she giggled into me before it turned into a moan.

Exploring her mouth suddenly wasn't enough, and I left it, leaving kisses down her cheekbone and then started to work on her neck. Brittany's nails bore into my bare back as I did.
It was all about getting to know her. I bit slightly, and she almost whimpered. Oh, she liked biting.
I kissed the place behind her ear, licked my way up and down her collarbone, and before we knew it we were lying in a bundle of sheets, me straddling her.

The kissing turned warm and lazy, my hands fumbled to her chest as I rubbed against her hesitantly. Brittany opened her eyes slightly as I left her mouth, letting my hands caress her left breast, letting my thumb leap over it slowly a few times. Her bra was thick but her nipples must have been very hard because she closed her eyes, her back arching a little as I did. She smiled towards me, and sat up, reaching back to unclasp my bra. I felt my already hot cheeks tingle excitedly, and the pain in the bottom of my stomach became more unbearable.

Then she kissed them and I closed my eyes, partly falling, partly being pushed against the end of my bed, Brittany licking her way up to my lips before kissing my ribs and stomach. Her nails travelled down my thighs, and one of my hands gripped her hair while another one gripped the sheets. She kissed me right above my panties, then on the inside of my thighs. I didn't know where to go, it was all too much to fit inside my body, my room, my house. It was too fucking big of a feeling to fit in Lima Heights.

My toes wanted to curl into themselves as she leaned over me, I grabbed her neck with one hand, and shoved my thigh in-between her legs. Her knee pressed against me, and I giggled awkwardly, before moaning as she rocked against me, kissing me beside my mouth. She seemed to hang on to my ribs, and I had my hand at the small of her back, moving with her too.

We weren't even inside of one another, but just the feel of her warmth rubbing against me was enough to make me grind harder and faster and in one last motion she collapsed in a heap of moans on top of me, shivering.

I felt like crying as I breathed in deeply, my muscles trembling. Never before had I felt the climax hit me so hard. I mean, I was great at sex. I did get orgasms most of the time, but this was different. It had been like just her touching me could make me reach the point of no return.

Brittany gave me a small kiss on the lips, before moving off of me to lay down on the side. It felt lonely and wrong in between my legs. I just rolled after her, letting a hand come to her hip, pulling her closer and looking at her. She smiled as I met her eyes before closing them again and seeming to drift away. I kept staring at her, wanting to reach out and touch her face and beg her to do this to me again, but I refused myself. A new feeling was starting inside of me. I felt vulnerable and it was revolting.

A little annoyed and on wobbly legs I went up to put another duvet over her, before putting my head on the pillow on the right side of the bed, still watching her side move up and down, her stomach in and out, imagining her breath tickling my toes underneath the covers.

.

A/N: Hot enough for you?
Oh, and one more thing. What now? I love suggestions.