With you on my shoulder

By HeartofSummer

Genre: Brittany and Santana romance

Copyright: Lord Tubbington is not mine. But the world is his. We all know it.

A/N: Lord Tubbington is here to remind you I just moved to London... I have got a life for once! Doesn't mean I've forgotten about this fic though! Bear with me, alright?

Chapter 12
So 90's (Sectionals)

(Brittany)

.

I throw the rest of the so called "chicken tikka" away and turn to make sure Santana's still right behind me, happier now.

"Feeling better?" she asks me, and I just shrug. The baby bird in my locker started singing because it was happy, and the janitor had to bend it open. I had been sad all morning about it, and they had made me go talk to the scary cleaner lady. I don't know if she actually is the cleaner, because she doesn't look like it, but she forced me to talk to her about the bird and why I wanted to lock "the poor animal" in there. She even asked me if I felt like the bird. I told her my dad's the vet and that I had birds inside me, but that I knew I wasn't a bird. The good thing was that the bird had gotten well enough to fly, and most techers had spent all morning trying to catch it. Now it was sitting in the ceiling of the cafeteria, singing.
I look down and nod. She gives me a smile, reaching out to entangle our pinkies. I smile too, though a bit nervously since I'm about to ask her something embaressing. But the best thing about having a little sister and asking my best friend over to help me babysit, is that no one would ever think it was a date. Not even Santana.

"Uhm, San..."

"Mhhm?" she asks, our elbows brushing against each other as we try to get through the crowd. I catch a glimpse of Finn laughing at Pucks joke, while Quinn is leaning her head on his shoulder, staring at Puck's plate. She looks a bit sick. I should thank her later. I got the idea about babysitting from her. I even begged my parents to go have a night out.

"Uhm... I've got to babysit tonight. Would you mind helping me?" Santana doesn't even look at me when she answers, just shrugs.

"Sure. But isn't your sis a bit too old to have a babysitter?" I shake my head.

"Well, not really, but... when I was her age I was still drawing ducks all over the sitting room walls," I nodded. Santana laughs quietly. I can hardly hear it over all the chatter.

"They act from experience. Your parents always had a soft spot for you. No matter what you did they never really had the heart to make you stop."

"I just wanted a wallpaper with ducks on them!" I said. "And mom said they didn't have any in the store." Santana laughs again.

"I've got Maths. See you at practice then?"

"Okay! Bye! Good luck with the rainbows!" I waved at Santana's as she raised an eyebrow over her shoulder as she went, feeling so happy I couldn't even feel my face.

.

.

She jumped a tiny bit when my fingers went against her hand.

Daphney was half asleep on her other side, head on her shoulder, and I had bit my lip so hard not to do anything to Santana before this. But now, with her hand right beside mine on the pillow, the temptation was too big. I really hadn't been thinking of things beyond touching her, really. Okay, so I might've had a few flashes of me grabbing her from behind when she was making the pasta sauce, but that had only been to hug her. Or help her stir the pot. Or...

Santana's eyes were fixed upon the screen where Hilary Duff were just inching in to kiss Chad Michael Murray. I respondend to this by using my nails instead. Santana squirmed and pressed pause on the control, moving her hand away.

"I think it's time for bed, Daph. You're drooling on my shoulder." Daphney looked up, eyes half closed, with a whine in respons.

"No! I'm not tired..." she yawned, eyes getting all teary at the edges. "...at all."

Both me and San laughed. "Riiight. Bedtime. Or would you rather like to help us do the dishes?"

"Oh, alright then..." she said, suddenly in a hurry to go to bed. Santana got up as well, taking a hold of our dessert bowls.

"You go make sure she doesn't fall asleep in the stairs and I'll start down here." She went in to the kitchen as if something was chasing her, and I smiled to myself.

"Alright!"

I quickly made sure she brushed her teeth before she dragged herself into bed. While she did it I locked Tubbington into my room. He gave un an offended mew, but I just whispered to him to go to sleep. Mommy was gonna do something and she didn't want to be disturbed.
Daph gave me a kiss on the cheek, before she immeadiatly fell onto the pillow and started to snore. Bailey got up and lay down at the end of her bed, wagging her tail at me.

"Stay" I giggled, turning off the lights and shutting the door quietly behind me. Sighing, I braced myself for what I wanted to do. Just the thought of Santana being downstairs, alone, made my thighs hum. I pressed my fingers to my lips. It's a piece of chocolate cake to seduce someone, but Santana wasn't exactly one of the boys. I needed to talk to her, but even more than that I needed to kiss her. Right now.

I went down the stairs, trying not to think but to just do. As soon as I saw her looking out the window with her hands in the hot water, I did. Sneaking up behind, wrapping my arms around her. She jumped, swore quietly in spannish and then relaxed into my touch.

"Stop scaring me." Her breath hitched at the end as I kissed-sniffed her hair.

"Sorry, San. I just really wanted to hug you." She took a deep breath, as if to steady herself.

"Look, Brittany, about the other night..." I didn't let go of her, I just leaned my head on her shoulder, remaining my friendly approach. "I was really drunk and took a bit of advantage of you. I guess I was horny as well. Let's just say his results won't go into Guiness." She laughed coldly.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked her, the need to take care of her slightly overpowering the want to kiss her.

"What's there to talk about? Most guys don't have very long staining power, we both know that." She laughed again, and my grip tightened.

"But girls definatly do." She froze in my arms.

"Excuse me?" I smiled as I pressed a kiss againt her ear.

"Girls definatly do. Have staining power. We both know it's all about hitting the right spot."

"Brittany..." her voice was ragged but definatly a bit teasing. I planted a few kisses on her neck, feeling her wet hands in my hair. Then I turned her around, gripping her by the hips and pushing her against the sink. She ran her hands across my shoulders before staring up at me, eyes dark and smiling. So, so tempting. Warm coke.

I leaned down to kiss her lips, feeling her teasingly respond, leaning into my touch. Kissing, that we had done before. There was nothing strange about it. I knew just where to bite to make her tremlbe.

Santana moaned qietly, her hands on the back of my skirt. Then I pulled away, almost runnning to the sofa,kissing her again before sitting down. San straddled me, and managed to talk to me as I bit her lip.

"You do know we're just friends right?" I hardly heard what she said since her mouth was pressed against mine through half of the question. If this was friends, then fine. As long as I could keep doing it. I just hummed in response, laying on top of her on the sofa, pressing harder against her. Then I leaned back, took a hold of her panties, and pulled them down her legs, slowly. Santana looked at me with expectation and what looked like fear in her eyes. She took a hold of my hand, looking at her lingerie. It was black lace. I looked back at her, grinning. She gave me a flickering smile, that seemed to dissapeared quicker than it appeared.

I threw them on the floor, letting a hand softly go up on the inside of her leg, to her knee, then back again. Then I did it again, only going further up. I repeated this, looking at her, then adding a kiss on top of her trembling kneecap before letting my hand go all the way up. Santana sucked in a sharp breath, closed her eyes and sighed. I leaned closer, taking it all in.

Santana's fear was gone and she urged me closer, seeming to need me to do it as much as I wanted to. It came to me as naturally as holding her pinky had. I just got lost somewhere, feeling her legs around me. It was weird, but it was like we didn't even have time to take the cheerio costumes off. But then, when it was actually, literally happening we both slowed down. Locked eyes, kissed.

She shuddered, moaning, biting her lip hard with closed eyes. I kissed her right below the chin, feeling her pulse against my mouth, before putting my head on her chest. Santana's fingers came to my ponytail, undid it quietly, and started pulling her fingers through my hair. Both of our breathing slowed down, melted into one and I'm not sure how long we lay there. I started pulling my nails up and down her leg, and she didn't seem to mind. For once, I didn't have anything weird to say. For once... everything made perfect sense.

That's when we heard the keys in the door.
Santana turned to ice, then she almost shoved me off of her. She started putting pillows that had fallen off back into place, tripping over the carpet and slamming her knee into the coffee table. She swore in spannish again, and my mom called from the hall.

"Girls, are you awake?" I hurriedly glanced around the room. That's when I realized Santana's panties were peaking out from under the arm chair. I picked them up, giggling, hiding them behind my back just in time for my parents to come around corner.

"Hiya mom, dad! Did you have a nice time?" I smiled and took Santana by the arm, smiling. I could feel her shaking against me, smiling effortlessly, but shaking none the less.

"Oh, it was lovely darlings. So what have you-? Oh, A cinderella story, is it?" She grinned and winked at us, and Santana laughed.

"Well, Daph chose it." My dad just smiled and said:

"Ooh, I don't think you suffered, having to look at Prince Charming all night." Considering what had just happened on the sofa, I guess he should really be talking about Cinderella... But I kept that thought to myself.

My mom took her scarf off, looking around.

"Wow, and you've even cleaned up after yourselves. Maybe we should start going out more often, apparently it's cleaner after we get home." She put her hand on my dad's arm, and he laughed loudly.

"At least there are no stray birds in the dishwasher, right?" He winked at me. My parents had liked the idea of me taking care of the bird. Dad actually laughed when Principal Figgins told him. I'd overheard him describing all about the fact that the locker had air holes and was high and best of all dark, which would stop the bird from trying to get out and hurt itself. Then he's talked to our principal for half an hour about birds. Apparently the Principal loves them - especially ducks. Just like me!

"Actually, there are still some dishes-" Santana moved to take care of it, but mom stopped her.

"Oh, don't you dare! Leave it and we'll take care of it tomorrow." Then she smiled. "Are you staying?" I looked at her expectantly. She met my eyes and actually, I think, blushed.

"Nah, I better get home. Promised dad breakfast tomorrow." She smiled and I followed her into the hall.

She put on her shoes, not looking at me and without leaning forward. When she stood up, I just looked at her, smiling. My hummingbirds where going crazy, and I leaned in close holding onto her middle, kissing her ear.

"I wish you'd stay." She swallowed, nodded and looked away.

"Next time." I pushed her panties into her hand, laughing quietly, and she smiled too, before shouting:

"Bye you two! See you!"

"Bye sweetie, be safe! You sure you don't want a ride home?"

"No thank you, I'll walk. Bye!"

"Bye!"

One last look at me, a smile that she tried to keep away, and then she was gone, pushing her panties into her backpack. I giggled again, closing the door and leaning on it, letting out an excited breath.

.

.

"It's all coming down now," Santana says to me and I give her a concerned look.
"Hoedown Throwdown, like in Hannah Montana." She ignores me as she calls Kurt. She's been ignoring a lot today. I smile at the thought of the other night though, feeling a tingle. I shake my head, trying to concentrate. As soon as Kurt picks up, she's on it.
"We just heard, who told?"
"We assumed it was you," Artie says, and I can tell it makes Santana annoyed. I lean in towards her a little, wondering if it was true. No, she wouldn't do that, never. Santana snaps.
"Why would I do that?"
"To get back at Puck," Kurt explains, like it was the most natural thing in the world. "Aren't you guys dating?"

I look at Santana for her answer. She told me it didn't matter, she told me they weren't dating. She told me... I feel the urge to make them back away from her, and at the same time back Santana up. My free hand found the hem of my skirt, tugging nervously.

"Sex is not dating." I look away, agreeing.
"If it were, Santana and I would be dating." The words are out of my mouth before I can even think of stopping them. This happens to me way too often. I have an idea, I speak and then I think. We both stop apbruplty and Santana's head snaps at me, then she quickly looks away, worried someone might be looking, I guess. I look at her, listening to everyone on the line holding their breaths.

Uhm, well, that was not supposed to slip out. I mean, we would be dating but we're not. We're just friends, and... no, no matter how you look at it, we had sex. I feel my heart skip a beat. Shitcakes.

I look down at my feet, almost hearing Santana's brain sorting through options a million miles an hour. Trying to save the situation.

I bet Tina's interested, Mercedes is rolling her eyes, Kurt is hungry for gossip and Artie... well, like any other guy he's probably having a fantasy about me and Santana making out with Tina in front of him... I guess I wouldn't mind making out with Tina, but I'd rather not share San.

"Look, I don't wanna rock the boat." I look away, start moving my feet to keep up with Santana as she's working on ignoring the words that just slipped out of my mouth. I feel the heat on my cheeks, hoping they misunderstood. Worrying about Santana's angry reaction to this. A terrible feeling start bubbling inside of me, reminding me that I might have ruined the chance of ever having actual sweet lady S-E-X with her ever again.

"Since Quinn got pregnant, I'm top dog around here." I nod my head in agreement, keeping quiet. That's why this can never get out.
Suddenly Mercede's blurts;

"Hold on, Rachel's walking by!" Santana's arm shoots out to stop me, grabbing at my elbow and making my heart miss a beat. I draw in a sharp breath as the devil walks by.
Mercedes looks so funny when she grins at Rachel.

"Hey, Hot mama!" She spins around, talking quickly to us. "Look, I know I screwed up telling all of you guys about Quinn and Puck. And I feel really terrible about it..." I sigh, looking at Santana. She's not wanted to talk about it, but somehow I'm worried that she's upset about this as well.

"...but we cannot let Rachel figure this out. If she tells Finn, he's going to flip!"

"And then we really have no chance at sectionals!" Kurt finishes. Santana meets my eyes and I just give her my tired look, while I know she's must be worried about so much more than just sectionals. We close our identical phones and cross our arms, like we have rehearsed it.

"I'm sorry," I mumble as everyone starts going off to class. She won't look at me.

"This is about sectionals. Nothing else matters." I nod. "We just... you need to go out with Matt. He likes you. He told me." I swallow hard.

"Are you sure?" Santana looks at me, then she walks away without another word. I look after her, pressing my nails into my palm.

.

.

"The punk just walked in and sucker punched me!"

"Don't play dumb! You're too friggin dumb to play dumb!"

"Hey!" Mr Schue's voice is angry, and I really don't like it. I have grabbed onto Santana, worried.

"Who told you about this Finn?"

"Obviously it was Rachel!"

"What? I didn't do anything!" Rachel looks like she's peeing her pants. I swallow.

"Yeah, it was Rachel, but I wanna hear it from your. I wanna hear it from both of you!"

"Hey Finn, just calm down!" Finn tears himself away. He looks like his whole body is hurting. If I hadn't been so scared, I would've hugged him.

"Noo! They're both lying to me!"

"Is it true?" Quinn is crying, quietly. "Just tell me, is it true?" She steps forward, sobbing, with Puck's eyes fixed intently on her. No, everyone's eyes.

"Yes," her voice is breaking. "Puck is the father." Shitcakes.

While everyone's piling out, Hannah finds me.
"Sue want you in her office, ASAP." I nod, look at Santana talking to Matt and Mike, and slip away. It's better if I leave her out of it.

.

.

"You leaked the set list! You don't wanna be here. You're just Sue Sylvester's little moles!"

I feel frightened and ashamed. Quinn says behind us;

"I know for a fact that's true. Sue asked us to spy for her." I looke at her, slightly betrayed, my hands shaking. Santana steps up, like a knight in shining armour.

"Look, we may still be cheerios, but neither of us... ever gave Sue the setlist." She shrugs. I don't like this, and it's so typically Santana to protect me, and to speak for us both. This is Glee club, I want to be honest with them. I want them to know I have a mouth and a voice and a will of my own. Even though I adore my best friend, I want to come clean about things. Truth.

"Well... I-I did, but I didn't know what she was gonna do without it." I stood up to Sue today, and didn't tell her about the Quinn/Puck/Finn drama. But I leave that out for now.

People sigh and roll their eyes, groaning. I think I'm going to cry. Really. Santana glares at me.

"Okay, look. Believe what you want..." she walks away, leaving me alone or maybe making sure all eyes are on her so that they can't yell at me. Still, her ignorance hurts more.

"...but no one's forcing me to be here." Her voice is full of emotions, emotions you can usually only detect when she's singing. "And if you tell anyone this, I'll deny it..." she pauses, looking away, rolling her eyes ."...but I like being in Glee Club." She shrugs. "It's the best part of my day, okay? I wasn't gonna go and mess it up." She's not looking at me. I'm alone in this.

Everyone's quiet. Somehow it feels like Santana took all the responsibility with her. Like her coming clean somehow made what I did less important. Like they should've expected it. Like I don't have a free will. She sits, spotlight on her, and Rachel of all people, speak up.

"I believe you." Santana gives her one of her rare smiled, and jelousy flares up in me together with the shame.

I go to sit next to Mike, who gives me an awkward smile. Like; "Poor you, stupid girl."

Quinn comes up and touched the sofa behind me. A queen's hand of approval. I now forgive thee. Like she would pat a pet. I feel even more miserable. I wish they wpuld yell at me, in a way. That's when Finn enters the room.

"I have one." he sighs. "I found the sheet music online, I used the cheerios copier to make copies... Then I thrashed the thing." I grab a sheet, looking at Santana, trying to tell her how sorry I am.

"Mike, Matt, Brittany, Santana- You're the best dancers. Figure something out and we'll all follow your lead." San looks down, and I do to, trying to get my head around it.

Finn must think we have a chance. I give him a smile and Matt (who supposedly likes me now) moves a hand to my arm. I already know what he's thinking, and move over to throw the ideas out on the table.

Santana is leaning over the table, ignoring me. I keep looking at her black, shiny hair... People act like I'm dumb. Maybe it's easier to live up to their expectations. Maybe... Maybe I should just not care. Maybe I am dumb. If I listen to what they say, maybe I won't betray them again. Because... I love them. I love them so much I can't describe it. It's like... Titanic. Red hair in the wind, the warmth of someone on your back, flying with you. And dolphins. Yeah, dolphins underneath and the sky all around.

.

.

She is twirling, a little bit drunk from the after party which turned into an after-the-after party. She, Matt, Mike and Tina are singing too, a bit out of character, together. Me and Mercedes are walking a little behind them. I know they're living on the next street, and I know it will be just me and Santana left. We still haven't spoken about it. We held hands during the announcement, and we hugged but then she just looked at me awkwardly and turned away.

Mercedes is laughing quite loudly at my story of Lord Tubbington reminding me of Kurt the other day - he tried to claw the jumper I got from my grandma for Christmas up with the same expression as Kurt had worn when he's seen it.

My eyes keep drifting to Santana, who is kissing Mike's and Matt's cheeks goodbye, and the boys come over to us. Mike gives Mercedes a double kiss, and she laughs bubblisciously, before grabbing Tina's hand, pulling her down her street. Matt hugs me, picks me up and spin me around. I laugh and gave him three soft kisses on his cheek for the effort.

Mike is skipping over to me and slaps me a high five before putting his arm Matt's shoulder, humming on "somebody to love" while they are going up Matt's driveway. I smile, looking to my side where Santana is studying me.

She holds out her pinky, and without a word we start walking towards her house. It's quite cold, and I pull my hat down even further to keep the heat inside my body. Looking up at the sky, I can see purplish clouds hurrying past the anorectic moon. The naked tree branches almost looks like fingers, reaching up to try and catch the fluffiness and squeeze them tight.

Suddenly I am pulled to a stop.

"Look, I'm not mad at you anymore." I look back at Santana. She is still holding onto my pinky. "Do you understand now why I didn't want you to listen to what she says?"

I take a step closer. "She's a teacher, I have to listen to her." She shakes her head. I let go of her pinky and take another step closer. "And about the other thing?"

"What other thing?" But she refuses to look at me.

"You know what thing. The- the... the dating-sex thing!" A car's approching, and Santana pulls me into the trees.

"Schh! It's not!" I look at the road, and then back at her face, only lit up with the orange light from the road. The shadows clouds her serious face.

"They were in a car, Santana..." I mumble, almost wanting to smile.

"Well, they don't need to know my bussiness." Now I do smile.

"So it is your bussiness?" She rolls her eyes.

"How drunk are you?" I don't answer, I just lean in to give her a kiss. She gets caught up in it for a second or two, before pulling away, hiding her mouth in her scarf.

"Britt, we have to..." she looks at me very seriously, and it scares me.

Then Santana moves and I close my eyes, expecting her to push me hard against a tree... Instead she suprises me by pushing some hair behind my ear, and kisses my nose. She's not smiling, but she is staring into my eyes when I open them. Then she leans in closer, puts her hands on my waist, and whispering into my ear;

"We need to keep this a secret, okay?" She gave me a kiss on the ear. "If we tell the others that we kiss and... just kiss, we can't do it anymore." I feel a sharp twinge of fear shoot through me.

"No more...sweet lady kisses?" Santana laughs loudly and unexpectantly, that melodic rare laugh that I wish I could save in a bottle.

"You like those, don't you?" I nod obediently, letting my arms wrap around her waist too.

"I don't just like them, Santana." She stiffens in my arms, but when I don't say anything and just cuddle into her scarf, she laughs again, quietly this time.

"Well, FYI..." she leans out, kiss my chin before letting her nose touch mine. "I don't just like them too." It's like a warm, sunny cat in my chest, stretching and rubbing it's claws over my ribs and I forget the cold and the scary woods.

It's almost like he's playing some sort of music. Maybe he and the hummingbirds can start a choir. Some day soon, when Santana puts her head to my chest, they'll play her a concert.

.

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A/N: Give it to me baby. It' cheesy. But it's... good. Haven't watched the "I kissed a girl" episode, so I'm off to do that now. hee hee. ENJOY!